SAMURAI SHODOWN V
Obscure classic beat 'em up action with a ludicrous price tag attached
Arcade - Issue 52 (February 2006) - 5.0/10
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SN00403W)
sshowdownv.txt
SAMURAI WARRIORS
Ambitious, epic hack 'n' slash that suffers from a lack of variation. Sometimes more hard work than fun
Action - Issue 34 (October 2004) - 7.0/10
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KO00602E)
Samurai.txtRead Review
As fans of the Dynasty Warriors games will know, bigger means better. And we're not just talking about the length of your sword either; we mean the colossal collective of enemies that players can hack, slash and blast their way through. Samurai Warriors transports the epic action from feudal China to Japan, but all the familiar game modes are on offer.
Story mode, unsurprisingly, gives players the chance to work through a multitude of armies as one of five specific characters, all with various weapons and outlandish special attacks. Depending on which character you choose, you'll encounter each of the other four's armies in your struggle through each six-battle saga. Successful fights naturally result in your character earning Experience points to upgrade their attributes after each battle.
Less is definitely not more here, as wave after wave of soldiers ripe for the slaughter charge at you, providing plenty of fast-paced, sweat-inducing gameplay. It's fantastic fun slashing your way through an entire army (it's common for the number of enemies killed on one level to run into the thousands), and knocking out tens of opponents in one go should prompt a glowing satisfaction in even the most ardent pacifist.
Unfortunately, this can bring on monotonous button-bashing gameplay too, because melee attacks are limited to the X button and magic attacks to A, with range attacks (Y) mostly ineffective against smaller foes. Spectacular combos are dependent on how many enemies surround you, rather than player skill, and there's not a massive variation of bad guys either. That said, the engine runs smoothly enough, and there's not the slightest hint of slowdown during the frantic action.
Although not as visually stunning or vibrant as their Dynasty Warriors Chinese brethren, the dark and gritty environments of Samurai Warriors do invoke the misty-eyed mysticism of medieval Japan. But at the end of the day, these too become very similar, only punctuated by the odd castle or two.
The several additional game modes (Free, Survival, Challenge etc) should offer a bit more sundry swordplay, but the time challenges only thinly veil the same core gameplay of the single-player campaign. Two sprouting samurai can take on the hordes co-operatively in the passable multiplayer, though during a particularly intense battle the action gets a tad confusing, so it's probably best to shun your sword-swinging mate and go this one alone.
It's not the most original or groundbreaking of Xbox games, but Samurai Warriors knows exactly what it wants to be and, being a devout samurai, makes no pretensions of swaying from the hack/slash/hack/hack/slash gameplay mantra. It can occasionally be more hard work than fun, but if you want ferocious fighting on an epic scale, tune in for the latest Dynasty episode.
SAVAGE SKIES
Pretty decent, with solid multiplayer, but Panzer sets the benchmark
Shooter - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 6.3/10
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SavageSkies.txtRead Review
Now let's be honest about this. If you were desperate to read about shoot-'em-ups involving winged beasts, then chances are you would have already stopped letting your fingers do the walking and feasted your eyes on the Panzer Dragoon Orta review. But you're here now, which means you want to know how Savage Skies can offer something different against the mighty Game of The Month that is Panzer. And the truth is, it does have a certain appeal, but you'll need to be somebody that goes for personality over looks to get the best from it.
On cosmetic value alone it's easy to dismiss Savage Skies. It's in a different league to PDO - kind of like the Nationwide Conference compared to the Champions League. It's not that it looks terrible - it doesn't - there are some impressive particle effects, some very good landscapes and the beasts themselves aren't short of a decent animation or two.
But where Savage Skies breaks the chains of being labelled a cash-in clone is through the gameplay. For a start, it's not an auto-scrolling title, which means you're relatively free to explore your environment. There are still plenty of invisible walls to bash against, but you do get a feeling of freedom as you swoop and soar between cliff faces and castle turrets.
The missions are also pretty varied. At the start of a single-player game you have a choice of joining one of three factions, with each faction having a campaign consisting of nine missions. The missions look quite different but the objectives remain similar: search and destroy, rescue, protect and escort... you get the picture. Each faction has their own beasts - ranging from some evil-looking skeletal dragons to cuddly owls, so there's an incentive to play through the different campaign options - but it's a shame that all the creatures handle pretty much the same.
Then there are the multiplayer options. You and three friends can duke it out in split-screen Deathmatch mode, or choose between Team Battle, Crystal Capture or various Co-operative missions. So with nearly 30 missions and a comprehensive multiplayer mode, there's certainly a case for Savage Skies to contribute to the shoot-'em-up genre. It's just a shame the publishers decided to release it in the shadow of a dragoon's wing...
SCALER
Very generic but surprisingly fun. The addition of several different characters tips the scales in its favour
Platformer - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 6.3/10
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TT12201L)
Scaler.txtRead Review
A name like Scaler may not conjure up the most pleasant of images; it's a bit too close to scabies, scabby and scaly for our liking, things we generally go out of our way to avoid. So after prolonging our follicular phobias for as long as possible, we got under the skin of this pleasantly entertaining platformer.
Forget the baffling plot (some nonsense about a kid who, whilst being interrogated by an army general commanded by evil dragons, gets zapped with electricity and turns into a bright blue lizard then gets teleported to the Dragon's home world). We told you not to ask. Instead, kick back and just enjoy the chaos.
If the opium-smoking caterpillar from Alice in Wonderland ever designed a game environment, this would definitely be it. Psychedelic clashing colours, giant mushrooms and baddies straight out of Critters 3 all add up to a truly bizarre experience. Central character Scaler's movement is slippier than a greased-up slapper at a foam party, which becomes pretty frustrating when precision jumping over precarious, tricky platforms. Ranged attacks using Scaler's impressively big, erm, Dragonhood mean his thrashing tongue makes smashing your way through the tons of breakable objects an absolute breeze.
Each level provides a decent enough mix of simple puzzle solving and exhilarating zipping around on the handy vines that link each mini-stage. Scaler has the ability to upgrade various attributes, dependant on the amount of those phenomenally useful golden orbs generic to so many platformers. By destroying specific enemies, Scaler also gains the ability to assume their form. Often vital to progress past certain puzzles, this brilliantly keeps gameplay fresh and varied.
Obviously not the most groundbreaking title out there, but a solid title that, with a bit more concentration on the presentation front, could have scaled the heady highs of platformers.
SCOOBY DOO! MYSTERY MAYHEM
A fun and easy-going adventure. Brilliantly captures the cartoon's atmosphere. Zoinks!
Action adventure - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 8.1/10
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Scooby.txtRead Review
Over-age dropouts hanging out with smart teenagers, free love, suppressed lesbianism and blatant drug pseudonyms. The Scooby Doo! cartoons perfectly captured the mood of the the '70s, and garnered legions of blissfully naive young fans. Scooby Doo! Mystery Mayhem aims to encapsulate all of these ingredients into an easy-to-swallow,
bite-sized Scooby Snack, whilst creating an entertaining experience for relative newcomers, and it's done a sterling job all round.
Players alternately control Scooby and Shaggy, though both are very similar in ability, with Scooby's crawl move being the only major difference. By guiding the dopey duo through numerous levels, uncovering clues and solving some brain-friendly puzzles, the gang must unravel the mystery of who's haunting an old library, terrorising a movie studio etc. Characteristically, it's always the dodgy-looking bloke you meet at the start who rattles out the classic line, "I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you pesky kids!" once he's been rumbled.
Don't go thinking this is a simplistic kids' game though - it's far from it. Mystery Mayhem is littered with brilliant, authentic touches. The developer obviously has a real affection for the original cartoon (and not the rubbish film), as the atmosphere is brilliantly captured, from the great-looking cutscenes and voiceover (provided by most of the original cast) to the comedy sound effects and awesome canned laughter. There's no real combat as such. Instead, enemies (the customary ghosts, monsters and mummies) are trapped in your Tome of Doom. Whip out this nefarious novel whenever enemies are near and repeatedly tap the corresponding buttons to suck them into the book. By collecting more discarded pages, Shaggy and Scooby can capture more varieties of ghost.
Although there's no true health bar, our heroes are dependant on a Cool meter; too many scares and they'll scarper off to console each other with a hug. The Cool meter is restored with Scooby Snacks. Save points are represented by cameras, as they "capture a moment in time when the pair were happy together". Ahhh. There are several bonus games and levels to discover, including a comical eating contest and a mine cart ride that'll blast the cobwebs away. This all adds significantly more to the whole tripped-out experience.
To be fair, the level design isn't exactly the most imaginative in the world, and the camera isn't fully rotational, which causes the odd problem. But don't worry about all of this; just kick back, get the munchies in and let yourself sink into this wonderful, psychedelic haze of a game.
SCOOBY DOO! UNMASKED
The Scoob is back for another scrappy adventure - a distinctly average platformer
Platformer - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 6.0/10
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Scooby2.txtRead Review
Scooby Dooby Doo, where are you? Languishing in this distinctly average platformer, it seems. It's not terrible, in fact some bits are rather fun. Of course, run-of-the-mill platforming is just about all you'll be doing. Collecting items and twatting enemies out of the way is about as taxing as it gets, as Scooby, Shaggy and the gang investigate a series of maniacal special effects robots gone haywire.
Grabbing as many Scooby Snacks as you can get down your neck, along with pointedly obvious clues scattered among levels calls for a certain degree of platforming skill. Collecting food for Shaggy to cook up, thus gaining players additional reward points, is a humorous aside, though we would have liked to have seen a lot more of these side missions and mini-games.
Level design is confusingly inconsistent. The developer has included much more verticality in this latest Scooby scrape, and as a result the wonder dog has the ability to climb ladders, traverse gaps on monkey bars and descend death slides. This makes for a bit more interest than your average run 'n jump game, though the developer does put a lot of emphasis on these in early levels, so the novelty soon wears off.
The unfortunate counter to this is that there are far too many invisible barriers in each levels, and the result is a very on-rails experience. When you look at how cartoon franchises can be done (check out the excellent Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit), stuff like this feels very dated and tedious.
There are a couple of nice touches, like the way the cut scenes are cel-shaded to try and hammer home that cartoon feel. However, these look decidedly rough, and lack even the polish of a scratchy 1960s Hanna-Barbera offering. A bog-standard platformer that'll strike a chord with younger gamers, though not a lot of others.
SCRAPLAND
An entertaining adventure, massive in scale and with the characteristic McGee twist. Mulitplayer is a letdown
Adventure - Issue 38 (January 2005) - 8.0/10
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EL00102E)
Scrapland.txtRead Review
Have you ever woken up from a twisted nightmare, thankful it was only a dream? American McGee has those sorts of dreams, only he uses them to put an alternative spin on children's classic stories. Just look out for the upcoming game and movie tie-in Oz for proof. Taking the lead producer's role of Scrapland was no easy feat, yet although the game is a somewhat tamer tale, the end result is still a characteristically comical affair.
Scrapland has been bandied about in the press as a sort of 'GTA in space', and there are some striking similarities. First and foremost is the free-roaming nature of the game. Now don't get us wrong, the sleek and sexy cityscape would no way give San Andreas a run for its money in terms of environmental interaction or sheer scale. What it does have in its favour however, are stunning visuals. Lush, futuristic buildings ascend into a fantastic, asteroid-littered space panoramic, and the vibrant environments are alive with hundreds of inhabitants and explosive police chases.
Scrapland is a planet inhabited solely by robots. Their world was decimated by humans, so they've rebuilt it from scrap. As a result, humans (or anything organic) are outlawed. But the Mayor of governing city Chimera has now been found dead, and it's up to you as lead character D-Tritus (super-sleuth/reporter scum) to gather clues as to whom the murderer could be.
Gameplay is a weird hybrid of mission-based actioner and free-roaming adventure. There's a massive number of characters to interact with, and thousands of lines of spoken dialogue. Because every type of robot inhabiting the city is logged in the divine Great Database, D-Tritus can hack into all of them from any one of the ports dotted around each location. Big D can assume one of the 15 types of robot available (they're an inbred lot). Each has different functions or special attacks, giving countless different ways of completing missions. But there is a flipside to changing your image more than Madonna. Beholders, little flying snitch bitches of the police, are quick to point you out if they see you filling another's mechanical shoes. It's illegal, so do it away from the watchful gaze of their scanners, as denoted on your handy little radar.
Get caught, and just like an annoying little chav, they'll get their bigger brothers. Though slower and thicker, they pack a punch that's actually worth worrying about. It's here that Scrapland suffers its first short circuit. Sure it's fun swapping identities left, right and centre, but the Beholders will always eventually suss you as an impostor. Far more satisfying is to become a Beholder yourself and accuse a robot that needs assassinating, letting the heavy boys roll in and do their worst.
It's not actually possible to 'die' as such in Scrapland. After getting obliterated for the umpteenth time by persistent police, D-Tritus invariably ends up in the slammer. Escape is monotonously simple - take over the form of a little Stapler that appears in your cell, evade patrolling police and escape out of convenient tunnels. Although not a difficult task, it does quickly become tiresome as it takes five minutes to get to where you were before.
The more exciting aspects of the game occur during the ship-racing and combat missions. Race for cash, race to complete a mission, or just race for fun; there's a ton of different excuses to zip round tracks collecting holographic buoys. It's illegal to physically destroy fellow competitors, but your ships are equipped with a handy electrical whip. Although tricky to master, once you do you'll be leapfrogging the competition in no time, though watch out for your fellow racers as they can do the same to you. Whilst the races are enjoyable, you don't get much of a feeling of speed, due to the fairly sluggish nature of your ships. The controls are default inverted and can't be changed, either.
That said, you can build your own custom ships. Each ship requires plans which are teasingly difficult to discover, spread out all over Chimera. Once you've acquired the blueprints, head back to your trusty pal Rusty's Scrapyard and get to work. Choose the engine size and weapon upgrades, though your choices are limited by the amount of cash in your stash. There are tons of ships available, each useful in different ways. Beef up the engines of the more lightweight craft, and they'll blitz round the track like a greyhound on a promise. Toughen up your artillery and you'll be unstoppable on combat missions. Most of the ships still handle very similarly though, and it's a chore to keep trekking back to your garage to swap vehicles. There are a load of different sub-missions available, though once again these are limited to increasingly faster races - a shame, considering the amount of characters on offer that have gone unexploited.
The game features a rip-roaring multiplayer mode, using all the ships from the single-player game. Deathmatch, Flag variants and manic Race modes are available and these are a real blast, with crisp, intelligent maps ranging from sprawling expanses to claustrophobic caverns. It's an Iron Giant-sized shame then, that this is a woefully missed opportunity, only catering for two players split-screen. Xbox Live would have been great, but hell - even System Link or four-way same-screen could surely have been included? Remember how lost and empty you felt when Johnny 5 was all alone and helpless? That's how we feel now...
One thing's for sure, Scrapland is definitely a very unique experience. American McGee has taken elements of all the classic mystery-solving adventure titles of yesteryear, mixed up some reasonably entertaining race and combat action, and set the whole thing in a wonderfully bizarre universe. It shouldn't work, but somehow he's managed to pull it off. For sure, spanning several genres doesn't give the game the depth it really needs to be outstanding, but dipping into each just enough results in an affably accessible title. For an alternative spin around tomorrow's world, do check this out. Scrappy dappy do.
SEABLADE
Derivative, difficult bog standard arcade dogfighting shooter clone
Shooter - Issue 17 (June 2003) - 4.0/10
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TM00901E)
Seablade.txtRead Review
Sign up to the SeaBlade Corps for no particular reason and take to the skies in anger! You're part of an elite flying brigade tasked with liberating the people of the world, flying through banal checkpoint missions and quite possibly dying of boredom for your country.
SeaBlade is a fairly stock arcade flying game. You pilot atmospheric craft which can seamlessly dive underwater, triggering a crescendo of whale song and tranquil Jacques Cousteau-esque music. You'll rescue hostages, engage in dogfights and destroy legions of anti-aircraft weapons in the battle for a water-drenched planet.
You are given your instructions in cartoonish rendered still frames with voiceovers. The production values here start to give you a picture of the kind of budget SeaBlade was produced on. It's not exactly Hollywood, let's say. This sombre realisation continues when you reach the actual gameplay - while the craft models and animation are undeniably good, the game environment and effects are seriously underwhelming. This is one of those unfortunate situations where not all the parts of the game could rise to the same level.
The key feature is the ability to dive underwater whenever you like. Unfortunately, this aspect is at best a gimmick. There isn't any good reason to dive and the game isn't made significantly more interesting or challenging because of it. The underwater sections serve as a direct extension of the open-air areas, with scarce adjustment required in the way you pilot the craft or the activities you undertake.
SeaBlade follows many arcade conventions of the past. For example, power-ups behave in a very old-skool fashion, in that you can only have one weapon equipped at a time, and collecting more than one icon for that weapon upgrades its destructive power. It takes some getting used to, in this age of complex objectives and massive arsenals. The flight model has also been dumbed down to pure simplicity.
Strangely, SeaBlade is inordinately tough for a fluffy action game, even on easy difficulty. You are hardly given a chance to get accustomed to the controls and game environment before you're mercilessly attacked. Not that we're complaining - we've completed many a hardcore action title that was eye-wateringly difficult. But this game really makes you pay. And pay, and pay.
It's not exactly impossible, but progressing through the game requires such a studied, anally retentive effort than you might as well be reading chemistry textbooks. It's so tough that we'd argue most people won't find it entertaining. And to top it all off, there isn't even any spectacular cutscene footage, really great effects or genuinely interesting story developments to motivate your interest in progressing. There are other shooters on the market that are more deserving of your cash. Stick with them.
SECOND SIGHT
Enjoyable, sadistic thriller with outstanding psychic powers and excellent controls. Brilliant but short-lived
Stealth - Issue 33 (September 2004) - 8.1/10
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SecondSight.txtRead Review
John Vattic is not your average antihero. By definition, an antihero is a roguish scoundrel with a soft underbelly. Vattic, on the other hand, is the polar opposite - a kindly, amiable intellectual with the soul of a tormented homicidal maniac. He's the equivalent of Peter Parker on a chainsaw rampage. Or your granny Uzi-ing down the Post Office staff following a bounced giro. You really don't expect them to be nasty. But deep down, they really are.
Second Sight, as you will no doubt have foreseen (get it?), is a telekinetically themed third-person action adventure with bags of sadism chucked in for good measure. The twist here is that in addition to pistols and sniper rifles, you, as Dr John Vattic, command a wealth of psychic powers for defeating the bad guys. Temporary invisibility and projecting yourself out of body will get you past most tricky obstacles. The craft of self-healing is a total godsend, too, yet none of this quite compares to Vattic's warped ability of propelling oncoming felons through the air via simple thought, forcing them to scream as their necks are wrung and twisted, and blood inexplicably spurts from every orifice. Scientists, doctors, security guards and government agents, you name them - they all feel the brunt of this gifted man's wrath.
In terms of story, Second Sight is basically what XIII (Issue 23, 9.0) might have been if Stephen King had scripted it. An amnesiac (that's Vattic) with telekinetic powers wakes up in hospital to nightmarish, fragmented flashbacks. Cue the token political conspiracy, and you're thrust onto a search-and-rescue mission for an incarcerated psychic and army colonel. The actual structure flickers between present day and the past, with the latter concerning a botched military operation in snow-caked mountains.
Almost every level can be played with varying degrees of action and stealth. First objective on the checklist is pure 'creepily does it' stuff, requiring you to escape experimentation at a top-secret lab. There are CCTV cameras to be disabled, computers to be hacked and patrolling busy bodies to evade. At this point, a basic Psi-blast (or a grab from behind) is all you have for eliminating anyone deemed a potential aggressor. Yet - now here is where things get nasty - as soon as a harmless scientist spots you, he'll sound the alarm. So you nail him. Never mind the fact he's shaking in the corner like a big girl's blouse - give the nerd a taste of psi and watch his backside roast. It's the old clich?: them or us.
So stealth is important for survival, right? Well, yes and no. You see - here's the other twist - while sneaking about may be fun, the whole stealth concept seems almost utterly pointless. Vattic's incredible powers make him a virtually indestructible weapon. In only a few circumstances is it truly imperative to keep your whereabouts secret, so why not storm in, psi-weapons blazing? Kill them all? Who cares? Most of the enemies are so weedy, a kid on a tricycle could run them down. Conversely, in Normal difficulty, Vattic is capable of absorbing more punishment than a 30-stone S&M fanatic covered in numbing spray. Plus, his healing skill repairs his damage almost instantly (provided adequate cover can be sought). Seriously, dropping your conscience and becoming a psychic mentalist will get you through this game far, far quicker than playing it cautiously. If you really must take the 'steadily does it' approach, then playing it in Challenging is the only option.
Fortunately, the slightly erratic stealth element aside, Second Sight is bloody good fun. The psychic powers are brilliantly implemented and if it weren't for Psi-Ops we'd be saying how innovative and individual they are. Select your chosen skill via the D-pad, use the Left trigger to hone in on a target (for healing friends or attacking enemies) and slam down the Right trigger to unleash the force. If you're using telekinesis, the Right thumbstick controls the direction of the target object, enabling you to create diversions by spinning crates and toppling tables or, as the story progresses, throwing guards through windows, impaling them on fences and tumbling them over ledges (great ragdoll physics, by the way). It's an ingenious system, and makes Second Sight something special.
As a full-on action thriller, Second Sight does the business. It's the kind of game you'll want to play to release some anger: smash some rooms up, hide away in a cupboard and bounce unsuspecting passers-by off far-away walls. It's fun, tense and full of character. It may not be especially big or original in the story stakes, but you'll definitely want to play this game until its bloody, satisfying conclusion. Get it and prove that brain can prevail over brawn. Assuming it's a psychic brain, that is...
SECRET WEAPONS OVER NORMANDY
Exciting, accomplished shoot 'em up. Easy to pick up, with a variety of modes on Live
Shoot 'em up - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.0/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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SecretW.txtRead Review
One of Great Britain's proudest moments was during the early years of WWII, where a handful of fighter pilots heroically defended our homeland against the might of the German Luftwaffe. The Battle of Britain, as it's known, turned out to be the first major turning point of the war, and video games frequently raid this period of history for inspiration, with varying degrees of success.
Secret Weapons Over Normandy, the latest in a long line of WWII shooters, picks up the story in the summer of 1940. The war is in full swing and you're a hotshot American pilot assigned to a top-secret British squadron, The Blackhawks. After a black and white archive film intro and simple tutorial, it's straight into the evacuation of Dunkirk, where you must provide cover for the beleagured troops. The levels follow recreated scenarios of real-life events and battles, from the Battles of Britain and Midway to the D-Day Invasions, albeit with a wedge of creative licence thrown in. There are an impressive 30 missions to dogfight, bomb and escort through, using 20 planes from the Spitfire and Hurricane to the P-51 Mustang and Me 262 jet.
Now we're all for a bit of realism, but nothing's more boring than flight sims that incorporate pre-flight checks, loads of instruments, and the rigmarole of a five-minute take-off routine. Thankfully, SWON throws this all out of the bomb bay doors and proudly wears its arcade blaster badge on its flak jacket sleeve to provide an easily accessible, refreshingly basic flying game that both beginners and more experienced Douglas Baders will find enjoyable. Although realism is compromised in the name of gameplay, this only makes for a more exciting experience, and there's the fantastic option to play through the campaign mode in single- or two-player co-op.
But it's not all dogfighting devilry, as certain missions require our young American pilot to get behind anti-aircraft flak cannons to repel airstrip attacks, and lend support from the tail gun of a B-17 Bomber. While these fixed gun, on-rails setpieces are great fun, they are infrequent breaks from the routine and, at the end of the day, there are only so many ways you can dress an interception/bombing mission before it starts to get repetitive. Which SWON does suffer from if you play for too long in one sitting.
A game like this is also crying out to be played with a group of people, though criminally there's not even System Link, let alone Xbox Live capability. SWON is an accomplished arcade shooter, which would have benefited immensely from an improved multiplayer game such as Crimson Skies provides.
SEGA GT 2002
An incredibly comprehensive and polished game very much in the style of Gran Turismo
Driving - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 8.5/10
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SegaGT.txtRead Review
A car is not a heap of cleverly sculpted metal with four wheels. It can actually be far more than the sum of its parts, more than just an A-to-B runaround. As a nation, English folk generally love the car. As a game, Sega GT 2002 nurtures that special relationship between man and motor.
It's only natural that you want to shower a loved one with gifts. A big fat exhaust here, an engine overhaul there. And all that spending results in a high, because you can feel the difference your devotion has made during the time you spend with your vehicle.
Then, of course, you ditch the car as soon as you can afford a better model. But hey, that's life. You always want the best you can get.
The great thing is, those besotted with automobiles don't have to express their love on the open road anymore. Gran Turismo meant the intoxicating world of car tuning and racing could be lived from your sofa. Little wonder, then, that Sega fancies a spot of GT action for itself.
Now us Xbox owners can mull over which type of air filter we want, too. And the happy news is that Sega GT 2002 is just as good as Gran Turismo 3 on many levels.
The main mode, Sega GT, is a huge, potentially endless feast of cars and driving. But at first you only have a paltry amount of cash, meaning it's humble hatchback time. Just like real life.
Racing your new pride and joy results in buckets of cash, as long as you perform well. This cash can be used to upgrade your current car or saved to buy new cars. Naturally, new cars enable you to win more prestigious races, which means more money. More money means more speed, better cars... it's a frenzy of consumerism. The possibilities are endless, what with 108 cars from 21 manufacturers, all of which can be tuned and upgraded to your liking.
Importantly, given the degree of variation possible with this number of cars available, the handling is spot-on. Making a change to your car's suspension results in just the kind of subtle difference you'd expect, which helps to make all the time spent pontificating over spare parts seem worthwhile.
The differences between cars are pronounced, and as you move through the game the spongy feel of your little Peugeot gives way to roaring monsters that grip the road as if part of the tarmac itself. Again, it helps make your progression feel far more satisfying.
The use of the pad rumble facility is excellent, with the higher frequency light rumble used subtly when your car begins to lose its grip. It's a real help in getting around circuits with a minimum of skidding.
Another plus in Sega GT 2002's favour is the chunky solidity of its visuals. They're never amazingly jaw-dropping, and the cars aren't the most detailed we've ever seen (the vehicles in Project Gotham Racing [Issue 01 8.9], for example, are better). But, overall, the game has a nice look to it, with reflection mapping on the cars and a winning mix of lighting and scenery. It's high quality stuff, basically, although admittedly a little lacking in thrills.
If all this is making you think that Sega GT 2002 is Gran Turismo on Xbox, then that's because, basically, it is. However, there are a few bits and pieces that give this game an identity of its own.
The licence tests, for a start, are friendlier. Rather than failing you the second you leave the track, you have a gauge that depletes as you commit driving atrocities - sliding out on corners, leaving the track, hitting walls, and so on. You only fail the test when the gauge hits rock bottom, which is a far more forgiving way of doing things in our book.
There's also greater variety in the races. As well as races that restrict entry in terms of car class or manufacturer, there are interesting competitions such as the drag race (useful for showing off acceleration) and a series of one-on-one races that ask you to gamble your prize money on just one more outing.
Lose in one of those latter showdowns, mind you, and all the cash won in that competition goes. This 'stick or twist' situation appeals to our devil-may-care attitude.
Another nice little touch is the way you can take photos from each replay and hang your favourites on the wall of you garage. Extras like that give Sega GT 2002 more of a fun, video game feel than the sim-centric Gran Turismo.
All this good stuff is counterbalanced somewhat by some fairly awkward menus, and long loading waits. When you first start the game, for example, there is only a handful of cars you can afford, but rather than present you with the choice you do have the game makes you go through each manufacturer's roster in turn until you come across a motor in your price range.
It does show you the range of cars you'll eventually be able to race straight off, but if you want to dive straight in, it's a pain.
Another menu-related annoyance is the slightly-too-long loading times. Because so much of the game is devoted to choosing new parts, new cars and general fiddling, you flick between menu screens quite a bit. All the loading pauses mean you might not get quite as engrossed as you otherwise would.
Picking nits (we won't say out of which head of hair) Sega GT 2002 falls just short of a handful of several truly superb racing games on Xbox in terms of actual racing thrills. It isn't as high adrenaline as Moto GP (Issue 04, 8.9) or Colin McRae Rally 3 (Issue 10, 8.9), nor is it quite as fun as the real-car thrashing in Project Gotham Racing (Issue 01, 8.9). In comparison, Sega GT 2002 is a tiny bit clinical.
But the fact is, if you want the almost RPG-style experience of building up the ultimate racing machine, this does the job admirably and at least as effectively as Gran Turismo 3, if not more so. Car lovers, start your engines.
SEGA GT ONLINE
Live-enabled update. Huge single-player career mode and virtually limitless on Xbox Live
Driving - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.7/10
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SegaGTO.txtRead Review
If there's one thing nobody can accuse Xbox of lacking, it's a wealth of quality driving titles. There are so many currently available for the console, encompassing all aspects of four-wheeled fun, from all-out arcade madness such as Project Gotham Racing 2 (Issue 23, 9.3) to the technical tour de force of Colin McRae Rally 04 (Issue 21, 9.1). Sitting comfortably in the middle lane between arcade action and realistic sim is the well-received and very successful Sega GT 2002 (Issue 10, 8.5), and that title has now been tweaked, fine-tuned and buffed with a soft chamois leather as it takes a hard right into the world of online racing...
All the original features are back, along with a considerable number of improvements and additions. Seven new manufacturers have signed up, bringing the total to 27, and this means 40 new cars - including the sublime Dodge Viper SRT-10 - bringing this total to an impressive 167 motors. And there are 27 unlockable tracks too!
Right, enough of the stats, let's get down to business. The game retains the original's impressive single-player mode, whereby qualifying for licences, competing in races, championships and Gathering mode earns you wads of cash. They say money makes the world go round, but in this case it'll make your wheels go round faster (crap.puns@OXM.com) as you use these readies to upgrade nearly every part of your beloved mean machine. With the huge number of cars on offer, this provides a huge amount of scope for all you carnoisseurs out there. The standard Quick Race, Time Trial and Replay modes are all included (as per usual in pretty much every driving title around), along with Chronicle mode, where you can race classic cars from yesteryear.
However, it says Online in the title and that's why we're here. New modes include Quick Battle, Tailored Optimatch, and Ranking Ladders. The main meat though, is in the frantic Battle for 12, where you can race (and hurl road rage abuse) against 11 like-minded individuals, initially over six tracks, before unlocking the remainder. You can use cars, parts and upgrades earned in the offline game to race on Xbox Live, thus giving a real incentive to play through the single-player game to unlock all the top motors.
Another couple of nice touches are the ability to transfer saved cars from Sega GT 2002 online to rule the virtual roads, and the way you can trade (and bet) cars and parts with other players within your Live session.
Online games can suffer from frustrating slowdown, and this fate occasionally befalls Sega GT Online, though not enough to seriously hamper gameplay. Also, collisions between cars can often have random results, ranging from immediate spring-back to ungainly momentary morphing but, aside from this, Sega has delivered a competent online update of an established classic.
SEGA SOCCER SLAM
Decent, frantic footy, best played with a friend. Ideal to rent
Sports - Issue 9 (November 2002) - 6.8/10
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Sega.txtRead Review
For a Sega game, Sega Soccer Slam has been curiously unheralded, save for our First Look last issue, of course. For those of you unfamiliar with its premise, this is a fast, slick and decidedly old-school dose of arcade action that plays a little like the NBA Jam of footy. Career-ending tackles are fair game, you can knock players off the ball with a flurry of fisticuffs and the goals fly in at a great rate.
To maintain a fast pace, there are no throw-ins, corners, or fouls, and each team has only four players - three on the pitch and one in goal.
The madness goes beyond the fast pace of the game. The real zanyness is reserved for a variety of special moves. Extended periods of possession, nifty passes and blistering shots all help to fill your combo meter, which you can use to power up players for a limited time in order to give you a better chance of scoring.
Better still, if you can save yourself from using the combo meter until it's completely full, you can use it to execute a 'killer kick', an outrageous Matrix-style slow-mo shot that, in the right hands, pretty much guarantees a goal. It also looks super cool.
In another nice touch, you'll occasionally see a spotlight with your team's logo moving around the pitch. If you can get a player with the ball into the spotlight before it disappears, you'll be able to execute a massive shot on goal that leaves your combo meter untouched.
These special moves add a layer of depth to what would otherwise be an extremely shallow game. With them, it's still only puddle-deep, but it's a riotous pool of liquid, the wacky moves providing a good incentive to play well and fill up the combo meter. Fast-paced two-player matches are where Sega Soccer Slam comes into its own, and blasting a killer kick past a hapless friend is properly entertaining.
Curiously, this game causes a little contention in the usually harmonious Official UK Xbox Magazine office. To some, the style of the in-game characters isn't particularly charming. They look nice and solid, but suffer from unappealing design; a bit of a shame in an instant-thrill game like this. What's more, chronically bad player voice-overs and an irritating Cockney commentator (who sounds like the idiot from the Iceland frozen food adverts) also make the game feel irritatingly and unnecessarily tacky to certain members of the team.
Others though, who shall remain nameless (but have long hair), find it all rather amusing, feeling that the style adds to the game, and that the characters are rather jolly. Everyone's entitled to an opinion, of course, but Ben is wrong.
Ultimately, the stylistic appeal of Sega Soccer Slam will come down to your own personal taste, but the game itself is simple, solid fun to play, especially with two or more players.
Worth 45 notes? Not really. But that's why you joined Blockbuster.
SENSIBLE SOCCER 2006
Ping-pong style footy with crazy curve-ball gameplay! Sensi Soccer is back...
Sports - Issue 57 (July 2006) - 7.0/10
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sensible.txtRead Review
Sensible Soccer is to football what ping pong is to tennis. It's fast-paced end-to-end football that's all about quick thinking and ninja reactions. It won't knock Pro Evo off the number one spot, but for a quick arcade-style kickabout, you can't get better than this.
Fans of the original 1992 classic will be happy with the news that this feels just like it used to back then, albeit with a better controller. But if you're not a gaming grandad and haven't played the original, just know that it's not about fancy footwork, through-balls, man-marking and all that stuff. Pro Evo is the undisputed king of simulating real footy, and this doesn't try to contend with that.
Sensible Soccer is about rapidly flicking the ball from player to player, then smashing it goal-wards and yanking the Left stick to put a crazy amount of curve on your shot. It's fast and frenetic stuff, with the ball being slapped between players like a pinball, whizzing from one end of the pitch to the other and back like a game of basketball. And it's easy to play because the controls are as simple as the game - there's pass and shoot and that's it. It's perfect pick-up-and-play arcade fodder.
Despite it's simplicity, there's plenty of skill to playing Sensible Soccer, mainly because you have to move the ball about quickly and the game never aims for you - the direction you press is the direction your pass or shot will go. Passing is pretty easy to master, but shooting is a real art. It's all about the curve. That's what turns multiplayer friendlies into sweary shout-a-thons, as ridiculous curve-balls bend through the air like whoever's in charge of gravity has had a few too many, and the ball smashes into the back of the net. Ah, it's good to be playing Sensible Soccer again.
Although it sticks faithfully to the feel of the original, modern technology has brought a few advantages. Cel-shaded 3D graphics are the first and, although it looks a bit plain, it does the job, and 360-degree analogue control is much better than the crappy four-way joysticks of old. They've added a sprint function too, but it's only for emergency situations because players have a sprint bar that depletes in seconds and doesn't recharge.
The only problems modern gamers may have are the lack of a player-select button (the game does this for you) and the inability to use fancy dribbling to pass a defender - you either get past or have the ball snatched from you. But that's not so bad, because it results in the ping-pong passing nature that the franchise is known for.
Sensible Soccer is a simple kickabout designed for quick blasts of multiplayer fun. It's nowhere near as deep or involving as Pro Evo or FIFA, and such a minimalist title might not be as well-suited to today's more sim-hungry gamer. But it does what it sets out to do well and is always a great laugh with mates. And at a 1990s pricetag of 20, where can you go wrong?
SERIOUS SAM
Hectic blasting with a smattering of laughs. Slick and distinctive
First-person shooter - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 8.2/10
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SeriousSam.txtRead Review
You won't think Serious Sam is all that serious if you've spent much time looking at the game in action, or even perused static shots. Indeed, a moment's glance at the box, or at the Johnny Bravo-esque Sam himself, should persuade you that the 'serious' bit of the title is actually a joke.
But even then, you probably won't be prepared for the sheer mentalness of the
action Serious Sam serves up. The plot, which concerns itself with an ancient, superior race that lived in Egypt and a present-day attack on Earth from outer space, is just an excuse to put the player in a sequence of utterly insane battles against some very memorable foes.
There are a lot of good things we can say about the Xbox version of Serious Sam. Rather than just lazily port the PC original straight across, the developer has tinkered with the game to make sure it feels properly at home in its new console environment. Gone is the typical quick-save feature that blights a lot of PC games, and in its place is a system whereby extra lives are have to be earned by racking up good old-fashioned points.
Points are gained by killing nasties, collecting hidden treasure, or even performing 'multikills' - ending the lives of several enemies with one shot of your chosen weapon. The better you are, the more lives you accrue - and when Sam expires, you'll respawn where he dropped after a couple of seconds' breather.
Further concessions to console-land include a spruced-up front end that reflects the game very nicely indeed. On the title screen, Sam poses next to the options and taps the inside of your TV screen; or sometimes, he'll just poke his head up over the bottom of the screen, look around shiftily for a few seconds, then mooch off again. It's gloriously silly, and lots of fun. And the best thing is, that silliness continues into the game proper.
If you didn't like The Library level in Halo, there's a chance you might not go for the flavour of combat that's served up here. It's the same kind of non-stop, sweaty, desperate combat, requiring frantic use of both thumbsticks to simultaneously avoid hordes of mental enemies and keep them in your sights.
The tone is rather different to The Library though, so if (like me) you were too scared to play that level on your own on tougher settings (the shame), you shouldn't have that problem with Sam. Bright primary colours, amusing quips from the man himself and a Fun Dial cranked up to the max mean that this is incredibly tense, but not scary.
Not scary, that is, except for one thing. One type of enemy is funny, but very, very frightening - it has no head, carries bombs, and runs after you until you kill it, or it gets near enough to detonate its deadly load. The thing is, it screams, so you hear it coming. When you can hear it, but can't see it, you might be scared. I was.
There are loads of other great enemies, too. They're like old-fashioned game baddies brought to life in 3D, cloned hundreds of times, and sent into battle. All at the same time. And wait until you see the bigger ones...
The graphics are colourful and solid too. While they may not be the most cutting-edge visuals you'll have seen this year, the primary colours, big bright lens flare and exuberant weapon effects mean it's very appealing all the same. And since there can be dozens of enemies running about at any given time, plus their projectiles, you don't really have much time for a chin-stroking, bump-mapping appreciation session anyway.
And the good points just keep on coming with this game. There's a System Link mode, and you can do Co-op mode over it, too. That's excellent fun. What else?
Well, if the gameplay grabs you, it won't let you go for a long time. In a value for money move, both Serious Sam episodes so far released on PC are crammed onto the one disc, making for tons and tons of levels.
The thing is, though, this game is something of an acquired taste. It's incredibly manic and frantic, and if you prefer fighting sophisticated opponents or using stealth to achieve your goals, this probably isn't the title for you. Those not entirely convinced by it could find it all rather repetitive after a while.
But what SS does, it does very well indeed. It's the closest any game has got to playing like the ancient coin-op Smash TV. It's full of humour, energy, and if you play it close to bedtime you'll be too buzzed to get to sleep. So it's doing something right...
SHADOW OF MEMORIES
Drab, clumsy and low on enjoyment. A messy gimmick of a title
Adventure - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 4.0/10
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Shadow.txtRead Review
Time, please! We spent last month Sweeping it and Splitting it, and now we get the chance to meddle with it and control our destinies.
In Shadow of Memories, you control Eike, a man stabbed in the back by an unknown assailant while leaving a caf?.
Eike enters a strange limbo where a camp, disembodied voice offers him the opportunity to go back in time and alter events in order to save his life. He agrees, and goes back to half an hour before the stabbing. If Eike succeeds, he must deal with the consequences of his new life.
If it sounds complicated, it isn't really. You're given a glimpse of the future and how you snuff it, then you're jetted back in time in order to prevent it from happening. In fact, everything about Shadow Of Memories is a bit too simple, from the primary school graphics to the suffocating linearity of the tasks you're asked to mill through. While the concept is fantastic, it's dull to play, thanks to the overlong cut-scenes and a plot with more holes than a tea bag.
Technically, it's quite shameful. The low-detail visuals shudder and creak around Eike, who clomps about the place in a pair of shoes that sound as if they have a megaphone stuck to them. This is a workmanlike conversion of a game that was workmanlike when it made its debut 18 months ago on the PlayStation 2.
Playing the game involves little more than completing a series of Resident Evil-style puzzles, but with none of that game's cool carnage inbetween. The puzzles are either too easy or so random that you're reduced to trial and error.
Silent Hill 2: Inner Fears (Issue 08, 8.4) outclasses this in terms of looks, atmosphere and overall quality, and is a better purchase than this messy gimmick of a title.
SHADOW OPS: RED MERCURY
Rock-solid shooter that any FPS fan will lap up. Nothing new, but great in multiplayer
FPS - Issue 31 (July 2004) - 8.0/10 - Xbox Live features *
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ShadowOps.txtRead Review
We're not short of a squad-based shooter or two, but nothing tickles our fancy more than a good one. Bad ones can go to bed with no supper but good ones are welcome to keep us entertained all night long. The latest recruit to join the squad comes from Atari and the US-based developer Zombie. If you're a regular reader of this magazine, then you'll already be up to speed on how the game plays thanks to the playable demo featured on last month's exclusive disc. If you're a newcomer to these shores, then ring the back issues number on page 065 and sort it out immediately.
Shadow Ops: Red Mercury is more of a straightforward shooting experience than a realism-inspired title such as Ubisoft's Ghost Recon or Rainbow Six series. For a start, you can't control your AI team-mates, but they do move around the level covering you and supplying much-needed backup. We'll cover more on that later. The best thing Shadow Ops has going for it, is that it works. The controls feel rock solid and that's got to be the most important factor when doing the first-person thing on a pad. They're as smooth as silk and making that vital headshot should be within any FPS fan's capabilities.
You fill the freshly polished army-endorsed boots of an elite Delta Force operative, hand-picked by the CIA's Special Missions Unit to gun down terrorists and contain the much-talked-about Red Mercury: a substance capable of acting as a nuclear accelerant that can be sold to any terrorist with a credit card. It's not too surprising, then, that you and your team must race around the globe in order to save the world from nuclear annihilation. But no pressure!
Another impressive element of Ops is its presentation: the menus are easy to navigate, the game itself looks top notch, and a superb Hollywood-themed orchestral soundtrack backs all the action. Zombie has obviously spent a lot of time and effort (not to mention money) on the high production values and it's definitely paid off in the final game. Of course, using the latest version of the mighty Unreal game engine hasn't hurt the cause either.
Shadow Ops' opening mission drops you straight in at the deep end. And to be completely honest, it took us a while to hone in and get to grips with the task ahead. You're flung straight into the middle of an enemy hot zone and it's all going off around you. The chopper that sets you down takes a direct hit and starts spiralling out of control right above your head. This is your mission: secure the crash site and rescue any survivors you come across. The trouble is, there are oodles of terrorists between you and your goal, and you have to mow through them all to get there as quickly as possible. It's harder than it sounds, and it sounds very hard. Enemies you shoot drop ammo and the occasional health pick-up (vital on harder difficulty settings), so be sure not to leave anything behind.
As previously mentioned, you don't take direct control of your team-mates, and more often than not they're taking care of things behind you. This means that you have to venture into new territory on your tod. And if there's a guy with a rocket launcher round the corner, it's mission over and back to the start for you. The AI bots can occasionally box you in too, and as there's no command to move them, you can be there for a while trying to find a way past them. Thankfully it's not enough to put you off.
Overall there are about 20 single-player missions (as well as a whole load of multiplayer options) and each one features a basic objective that must be competed before you can move onto the next. Some missions require the taking out of huge anti-aircraft guns and radar stations while others see you having to protect a designated person for the duration of the mission. Each mission takes place in a new setting so the background scenery never starts to grate either. From the war-torn streets of the opening level, you'll be whisked across the globe to jungles, underground bases, deserts, military installations and a whole load more.
The weapons get bigger the further you progress into the game and there's a whole load to choose from. You can only hold a few at a time but you get plenty of grenades to blow stuff up. And we all like blowing stuff up. One portion of a later level sees you having to cover your men sniper-style as they plant charges on designated enemy targets. It's the little things like this that help break up the constant FPS goodness and give you a breather before throwing you straight back into the thick of it.
Shadow Ops isn't really doing anything new or cutting edge but, what it does do, it does perfectly well. It's clear that the original GoldenEye is a favourite of the developer as Shadow Ops is simple, straightforward, first-person fun. Fans of shooting loads of terrorists and blowing things up won't be disappointed at all.
SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG
Sonic is dumped in favour of his evil urban clone! But it soon settles down into a normal Sonic game...
Action - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 7.0/10
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Shadow_h.txtRead Review
Don't worry, Shadow the Hedgehog isn't half as 'urban' or quite as 'gangsta' as it first seems. Yes, the first level is laughably called Westopolis, the game features a ludicrously poor gunfire sound when you press a menu icon and the odd mixture of human, alien and woodland characters converse in a suitably street manner, plus there's the matter of all those guns you have to play with now. But it soon calms down and becomes a normal 3D Sonic game.
The streets of Westopolis quickly give way to the haunted castles and magic temples we've been spin-dashing through for years, and you're joined by the usual Sonic suspects as you go. Knuckles turns up, Amy Rose is there and poor defenceless little Cream the Rabbit needs to be rescued from da evil Robotnik crew - it's just like a normal Sonic game.
And those guns don't really need to be used that much, which is great news for us people brought up on 15 years of peaceful rescue-the-bunnies Sonic play. You can plod through it with a gun, slowly walking and aiming and trying very hard, but it's more fun to not bother and play it like Sonic of old - fast and linking attacks together.
Shadow has the same lock-on jumping attack from Sonic Heroes that lets you automatically attack bad guys without having to worry about your aim, so enemy crews can be gang-banged (bounced) to death just like before games all went urban. It's still a broken idea, though. Enemies take two or three bounces to kill, and once they're dead your attack button becomes a speed-dash button. So you die loads by flying off the edge of a level when Shadow goes to attack a non-existent enemy.
The save system helps lessen repeated death anger, with Shadow's numerous save points also acting as teleporters from which you can whiz back to earlier parts to complete each map's various tasks. There's a lot to do, but as you go it becomes more of a chore. The maps get bigger and more intricate, so there's more getting lost, more falling off ledges and more smashing along at top speed only to get killed by an enemy that pops up right in front of you. All familiar annoying aspects of these modern three-dimensional Sonic games.
If you're a die-hard and quite old Sonic fan, Shadow the Hedgehog will probably disappoint with its weird mish-mash of styles and the same awkward and flawed 3D play of Sonic Heroes. But if you're young and thought Heroes was fun in its own little way (which it sort of was), this is more of the same thing only with loads more stuff to do - and guns. Westopolis-side!
SHARK TALE
Respectable movie tie-in with fun, addictive gameplay. Superb presentation and lush visuals
Action adventure - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 7.0/10
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SharkT.txtRead Review
There's usually something fishy going on when games are sent to us after they've been released; more often than not they turn out to be complete pap. Activision needn't have worried however, because the quality and top-notch presentation apparent in all of Pixar's cinematic releases has been applied to this accompanying videogame.
Aimed squarely at the film's target audience, Shark Tale consists of 25 fun-filled chapters, or mini-games, loosely linking together the plot of the animated flick. Nothing more, nothing less. And seeing as most young kids these days have the attention span of an anorexic gnat, this is only a good thing (glass houses, Andy - ed).
Grabbing lead character Oscar by the gills, players work through mini-games such as evading pursuing sharks and recovering precious pearls from tentacled bank robbers. Frantically dash through crowded underwater environments on the back of tropical taxis, fight giant conga eels and, erm, dance your way to fame on live TV - all in a day's work for a cocksure cod. These levels are actually very entertaining, and far from being simple kids' tasks, will still challenge gamers of all ages.
The latter mini-game in particular, where Oscar must dance his way to infamy, is particularly tricky. Compatible with both of the two dance mats currently available for Xbox, the frantic pace of the steps will have little Johnny bouncing round the living room in no time, without the aid of Sunny D and Smarties. Us? We were knackered within two minutes of aquatic aerobics, and had to resort to the humble controller to get funky with the fishes.
The zany pace of these games is broken up by the occasional 'stealth' mission, invariably involving sneaking through Whale Washes (a fishy version of a car wash) and fancy Shark Restaurants. However, 'stealth' doesn't really work with 2D side-scrolling and, with a fixed camera whilst moving, gameplay often descends into a mad dash past foes. Perhaps Oscar should stick to his loud-mouthed, beastie-bashing antics. Other levels encourage us to explore lush environments (that really complement the look and character of the film), amassing totals of Pearls.
The presentation, as mentioned, is superb - just check out the way if you pause the game, the screen will flick to a newspaper article detailing your current level and predicament. Throw in loads of movie clips, stills and all the other staples of movie tie-in games, and Shark Tale should definitely keep the young 'uns entertained. Till the all-singing and dancing DVD comes out at least...
SHATTERED UNION
Old-school turn-based strategy drowning in maps and tactical info - could have been great if they'd tidied it up for Xbox
Strategy - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 6.0/10
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ShatUnion.txtRead Review
Ah, the ancient turn-based hexagon boardgame, a staple of old PC strategy titles, now lovingly recreated and brought to life on Xbox. Like Blockbusters, it's mostly a case of getting as many pieces on as many hexes as you can before the enemy does the same, then blasting him off strategic hexes you might require for your own armies.
Shattered Union, concerning itself with the second American civil war (shame they didn't have more of those) is a spectacularly complex mish-mash of ugly sprites and good intent. You take control of one of seven different factions (including a European 'peacekeeping' force) attempting to reform the dis-United States in your own mould. It's similar to the Total War games on PC, with individual battles influencing the wider conflict taking place on a Risk-style map of the former US.
It's good fun building up an army and then pitting it against another itsy faction Command & Conquer-style, but by God, you'll not know what you're doing. That's more thanks to a confusing front end and baffling array of number-filled sub-menus than the game itself being too complex. Picking the best equipment for the job and navigating your way to a position where you're able to enter a conflict with confidence is primarily down to luck. And why can't you skip having to watch an enemy's turn?
It's details like this that spoil what could have been a great little game. Still, it's a brave thing for Shattered Union to even come out on Xbox - it's certainly a refreshing departure from the usual slew of first-person shooters and urban driving games. But it could have done with a more thoughtful conversion - stripped back from its PC roots and with a less headache-inducing camera, this could have been good. As it is, it's a missed opportunity.
SHELLSHOCK: NAM '67
Great game that captures the darker side of war. Not for kids, but older gamers will love its grittiness
Shooter - Issue 32 (August 2004) - 8.2/10
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Shellshock.txtRead Review
It's all going off in the jungle. A scan of our radar reveals we've got Conflict: Vietnam, Men of Valor and the recently announced Vietcong all due before the end of the year. Iraq and WWII have been done to death and games based on the Vietnam War are next to don the full metal jacket.
ShellShock is the first wave and its unique take on the genre is its focus on the macabre: torture, suicide, napalm attacks, execution, amputation and other stomach-wrenching war wounds. You even have to gun down female soldiers. It's not a pretty sight and definitely not for the younger gamers among us. This is war.
Coding honours have been handled by Amsterdam-based Guerrilla (formally Lost Boys), the same team working on Killzone for PS2. Since the team started on the game for Eidos, Sony swooped in and signed up the studio to work exclusively on Sony platforms (it's not just Microsoft then). A side effect of this deal was that the game had to be made in the third-person. Don't ask us why and it does suffer a bit for it, but not enough to put us off. After all, we all love the third-person Conflict games, don't we?
As you can see from the screens, the game has a very distinctive and gritty style. The jungle environments ooze atmosphere and tension as a Vietcong warrior could be hiding in cover just five feet from your position. And you won't realise until they open fire. As we said, gameplay is fleshed out in a third-person mode and it'll take a few levels to get used to it. It feels like it should have been a first-person shooter and we would have loved it even more if it was. But once you've upped the sensitivity of the controls, you'll be popping heads in no time.
Before you're dumped headfirst into a sweaty Vietnamese nightmare, you get to pick one of three soldiers and initial your dog tags. It doesn't matter who you pick, as the story plays out the same whoever you choose. The game continues in a mission-based way and you can go back to any level you choose and on any difficulty level to pick up more medals and intelligence info - little extras that unlock some goodies along the way.
At the beginning of each mission you can walk around boot camp and talk to other soldiers. This all seems a bit pointless in our book and only serves to slow down the action. So find your helicopter, start the mission and get stuck in. Each mission sees you having to achieve a specific objective or two. These range from finding ammo stashes and enemy bases to escorting hostages to safety and taking out Vietnamese generals. It's quite a short game though, about 12 levels in all, with no multiplayer to extend its longevity. But you can go back and finish all the levels on various difficulty settings for some replayability.
Each mission is pretty much a case of gunning your way from A to B. Using cover is vital if you're to survive longer than a few minutes. The Left trigger makes your character sprint for a limited amount of time, and you'll need to use it as you run from cover to cover advancing towards the enemy. You'll be deader than Elvis if you get caught with your pants down in the middle of an open field.
Though you play the game as part of a team, you don't get to control anyone except your character. Your squad will move through the map by your side rather than running off and doing its own thing. The AI just about does its job but members will occasionally get under your feet or in your line of sight. Luckily there's no consequence for friendly fire, but your men will shout at you to cut it out if you accidentally hit them. They drop to the ground and get back up a few moments later and carry on like nothing happened. The enemy AI is also passable, if unspectacular. The soldiers will continue to run at you until there aren't any left.
ShellShock is an extremely violent game that plays on the horrors of war. You'll see people shooting themselves rather than give up valuable info, hostages gutted like fishes, women POWs executed for fun and lots of blood. Cutscenes will shock you, as will the in-game dialogue. It's a videogame nasty in the same vein as Manhunt (Issue 30, 7.5), but take all that with a pinch of salt and you'll find ShellShock is a great shooter, even if it is a little short.
SHENMUE II
A giant of a game that requires time, patience and an open mind
RPG - Issue 13 (February 2003) - 8.0/10
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MS05002E)
ShenmueII.txtRead Review
The Shenmue series is swiftly becoming the never-ending story. After debuting on Dreamcast in 2000, where it engulfed as many gamers as it sent into slumber, the sequel just about managed to crawl onto the console before Sega gave up the hardware ghost. With Shenmue now homeless, it needed another host to stage the continuing adventures of Ryo Hazuki, a headstrong young Japanese man who's hunting down his father's killer, the murderous Lan Di. The Xbox is now looking to be Ryo's new residence, and so Xbox owners get this offering, a port of the Dreamcast version, to pave the possible way for further Shenmue instalments. So, are we blessed to be able to sample this second episode of AM2's grand adventure?
Well, it still looks quite beautiful, despite not being all that noticeably buffed and polished over the Dreamcast original. When you first touch down in the Hong Kong harbour at the beginning of the game, the scale and colour of the scene still makes for something far more impressive than most games around at the moment. And the locations manage to keep up this level of detail and prettiness throughout, and look particularly striking when the in-game sun sets and night descends.
Every person you see milling around the place has a life, a daily routine they go about. They all look different, their faces encrusted with textured detail, and you can talk to every single one of them. And this is the first thing you have to do: talk to lots of people. You've no idea where to go or what to do yet, and you'll spend a lot of time just nattering to the locals, gathering information and directions. Shenmue II is a game that lives its life in the slow lane but, thankfully, it just so happens to take in some of the most impressive sights around during its tardy travels.
But it's not all early retirement for you as a player if you decide to get into Shenmue II, as there are plenty of tests of sharp reactions throughout the game. Quick Time Events (QTEs) occur during particularly action-packed bits of plot progression, whereby you effectively have to 'play' a cutscene, pressing the prompt buttons that appear on-screen. Some of these can get quite tricky, especially during later sequences (which stretch out over the space of several minutes), and failing to hit the right button combo in time can usually mean a cut-throat journey right back to the start of the segment. The trickier ones will simply become a test of memory, which is about as much fun as filling out a tax form. Overall, though, these are a welcome break of pace and rarely fail to look quite cool in action. Some are particularly memorable, too, and we don't want to give much away here, but there are plenty of death-defying rooftop high jinx and chainsaw elevator chases to be had quite late into the game.
Also, there's something a bit more chunky and rewarding for you to get your teeth into from time to time: the fight scenes. Since the Shenmue series is made by the folk behind the Virtua Fighter games, it's no surprise to find that this game contains an elaborate combat system that's wheeled out during the many times that Ryo has to fight his way out of, and into, things. There are dozens of moves to be learnt, and some of them are fairly hard - enough to make your bog standard beat 'em up scratch its head a little. Like the QTEs, it works well for the most part, but can be frustrating at times since you're normally duking it out with multiple enemies. Also, there's zero chance of you holding your own against some of the tougher opponents if you don't do your homework by regularly practising and picking up new moves along the way.
And you'd be surprised at just who you're going to be learning these esoteric kick-ass moves from. Thing is, Shenmue II is about a lot more than just a zealous revenge plot. Along the way, Ryo will have to learn umpteen lessons in Zen, usually from the most unlikely of people. The first game saw Ryo simply learning about just who murdered his father, and where he could be found. But here, in proper Empire Strikes Back fashion, he's going to have to learn to temper and condition himself and ask some pretty dark questions - revenge is still murder after all.
But then he can always cheer himself up with a quick game of Outrun or Afterburner at the local arcades. Which goes to show the biggest attraction of Shenmue II - it's virtually a whole world squeezed onto that little game disc. Just like Grand Theft Auto: Vice City on the PS2, if the main storyline is ever getting you down, then you can simply put it to one side and return to it later, while you head off and explore your intricate surroundings. And while the world of Shenmue isn't the hippest joint in Gamesville (despite being set in the '80s), it's definitely one of the most beautiful, with plenty to offer any inquisitive tourists. Go spend some cash to get happy... but be careful not to splurge every last dollar in your pocket; you're going to need to pay your way.
For a start, you're going to have to pay the rent. Yep, you read that correctly. Part of Shenmue's concession to realism is that you've got to earn yourself a living, and can't just sponge off the state like most other video game heroes in the world seem to do. There's a number of ways to earn yourself a crust in the game, and there are some points where you'll need a fair wodge of it to progress. At least you've not got to eat four times a day, or excuse yourself from a pivotal cutscene in order to have a wee. But who knows what's in store for Shenmue III, eh?
Until then, be sure to at least think about getting into Shenmue II. It's not for everyone, and it's unlikely to seduce you unless you're the kind of gamer who enjoys something gradual and slow-paced, and are able to look past the clumsy control and cumbersome nature of it all. In fact, it'll probably annoy and bore anyone expecting a 20-minute burst of pizzazz and disposable excitement. The majority of cutscenes just cannot be skipped, introducing a bit of frustrating Metal Gear Solid 2 syndrome - you're sitting there with a joypad in your hand, yet you have to wait like a charity case to be allowed to play your game. You'll also need the patience of a saint to put up with the longwindedness of everything - if Ryo buys something from a toy dispenser, for example, you're going to have to watch him bend down, put his money in the slot, remove the capsule and stand up again. It's like watching a really old person putting up a tent. Do you just wish they would get the hell on with it and finish as quickly as possible, or are you fascinated by just how much effort they're putting into it? You get the feeling that the developers have sat down to make the most realistic game ever, but realised that it's just not possible; instead they've tried to make the best of what they'd already crafted into an ambitious but lumbering adventure. Other than that, the controls do feel a bit syrupy, and Ryo is just plain cumbersome to control outside of QTEs and fight scenes. But if you want to wander around a world where you can talk to anyone, play a tangible part in an epic story and just soak up the intense amount of detail on offer, then give it some serious thought.
It won't bust your brain, ruin your wrists or tickle your adrenal gland, but Shenmue II is an excellent adventure, albeit a slightly awkward one. It doesn't play as lively as it looks and, like Morrowind (Issue 09, 7.6), it's slightly crippled by its own ambition, but it's pretty and can be incredibly engrossing. So, you've got a unique and slightly bizarre RPG which requires a fair bit of audience investment before it'll give up the goods. It's the kind of flawed masterpiece that usually garners a small, but incredibly appreciative, audience, finding its way into people's top tens as regularly as the second-hand bin of your local EB. Do you want to let one of the potentially greatest episodes of your gaming life to pass you by?
SHOWDOWN: LEGENDS OF WRESTLING
Weaker than the first game in the series. Matches drag on tediously and the presentation is shabby
Sports - Issue 31 (July 2004) - 4.4/10
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AC02904E)
Showdown.txtRead Review
If you're a wrestling fan, chances are you'll already understand the law of diminishing returns. The bottom line is, that if you keep doing the same old thing year on year, fewer people will give a Rob Van Damme about it.
Showdown: Legends of Wrestling is a prime example. It's been given a slight graphical spruce-up along with an obligatory spattering of new features, but no attempt has been made to improve it where it really counts: gameplay.
If you played the previous games and sussed how to exploit flaws in their AI, exactly the same tricks will work here. There's no spontaneity to your opponents' attack patterns, regardless of the difficulty setting. You can work out a simple attack regime, such as dropkick, slam, punch and reversal, and do it over and over again until the match ends.
Worst of all, the series' ass-kicking swingometer reversal system has been slammed in favour of an oversimplified 'press X to counter' technique, just like the atrocious Backyard Wrestling: Don't try This At Home (Issue 23, 3.3). The only noticeable improvement is that the pace is more rapid, but even this is likely to upset wrestling purists.
The Career mode can be finished in around four or five hours. Although it spans three decades and includes each era's most famous grapplers, it's still only 16 matches long. This tallies up as far fewer than the previous games; LOW II (Issue 11, 7.4) had 35. In order to make the game more difficult, your opponents' power bars are now approximately three times bigger, but this just makes matches drag on tediously.
Aside from the sharp-looking main menus, Showdown's presentation is shabbier than Mankind's best work shirt. The static story screens are laughably poor. It's a generation behind even SmackDown! 2, a game released four years ago on PSone!
The music doesn't fare much better. Few of the 76 grapplers have their 'official' entrance themes, and those that do, the tunes are so flat they sound like Jimmy Hart has tapped them out on a child's keyboard.
The only new feature of any significance is the Classic Matches mode. There are 15 classic matches to play, from Savage Vs Ultimate Warrior to Funk Vs Sabu. Because they're based on real scenarios, these matches are much closer to capturing a sense of wrestling nostalgia than the lame Career mode.
We really hope this is the final bell for the series. It's been dragged on for one fall too many. New game modes and six new wrestlers just aren't enough to entice new players, let alone anyone who's played the previous two games. Just like many of its real-life grapplers, it's way past time for Legends of Wrestling to retire.
SHREK
A very plain and unrewarding kids' game
Platformer - Issue 2 (April 2002) - 5.0/10
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TM00102E)
Shrek.txtRead Review
A good platform game is hard to find. You've got a tiny handful on PlayStation 2, a bunch of cuddly classics on the N64 and that's about it. There's a sea of pale imitators - into which Shrek falls, with his bulbous ass and mundane platforming action.
There's a loose connection to the film, in terms of the locations and settings of the levels; the fractured fairy tale theme runs throughout. Game tasks revolve around Shrek's irritating need to be a conscientious, do-good hero.
Each of the clich?d lands (Sweetsville, Creepy Crypt, Prince Charming's Castle etc.) features a batch of clich?d tasks for Shrek to busy himself with. His skills are very limited, especially compared to the agile, master-of-all-trades, cliff-hanging repertoire of the modern platforming hero.
He can do the basics - jump around, sprint and duck, kick and grab - plus he's got one hell of a gut on him, allowing to burp and fart with the right kind of power-up inside him.
The meat of the tasks, however, severely lacks imagination. Most challenges are based around playing fetch, having to herd certain fairy tale stereotypes (spiders, Bo Peep's sheep, skellytons) from one place to another and object collection. The objectives don't just lack sparkle, they have no effect on the level whatsoever.
Most annoyingly, every time you complete a chore, the stage resets itself and you're spawned right back at the entrance. Any attempts to multitask are pointless.
A good platformer needs to get across a sense of exploration, giving the player the sense that they're uncovering the enchanted nooks and crannies of a fantasy world.
Shrek feels like a set of scripted objectives tossed together onto a dull canvas. Raiding the Brothers Grimm universe should have made for a far more interesting game. As it stands, this is soulless and quite dull.
SHREK 2
Colourful and easy, but cheesy and dull. Not worth bothering with unless you're a Shrek nut
Platformer - Issue 32 (August 2004) - 6.0/10
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AV05509E)
Shrek2.txtRead Review
Noel, Myleene, Kym and the blonde one may have all disappeared back into oblivion or up the bum of some revolting budget musical, but Danny has made a name for himself. Having starred in the cult hit Shrek, the bulbous-headed ogre of Hear'Say has pulled off a coup. He's married Cameron Diaz, he's mates with Eddie Murphy, and now, on the eve of his second feature, a game of the same name comes along. Ladies and gentleorges, please be upstanding for Shrek 2.
For all intents and purposes, Shrek 2 is a kiddies' jaunt through the various locations of Far Far Away Land, a slow-moving monster-bashing meanderer of a game. It's top-down (don't be fooled by the shots, they're just there to make it look pretty), it runs on tracks like nobody's business (oh boy, does it run on tracks), and it's as easy as insulting a member of a reality TV pop band. But, unlike the films laced with their double entendres and knowing winks, this game is squarely aimed at tots.
Shrek bashes, Fiona twirls, Donkey kicks, and depending on which of the other playable characters join you at any time, you'll have an apple-thrower, a swash-buckler, a huff-puff-and-blow-your-house-downer, or other gifted companion in your team. You control each of the characters singularly, selecting which one you feel suitable for a task by clicking the triggers, then allow the AI to control the remaining three. Or, in multiplayer, four gamers can control a figure each. With a combination of teamwork and a hefty dose of thumping the flora and fauna, you work your way from one checkpoint to the next, all the while wondering what crate it is you need to smash to extract some of that infamous Shrek wit.
Sure, it looks pretty enough, but this is your standard film tie-in of a game. The voice acting is iffy but passable, and there are the prerequisite cutscenes to give a taster of what to expect in the movie. The gameplay never really extends past requiring you to punch things, or getting two characters to use a see-saw to reach high places, and it all comes across as a little bit vanilla. There are brief moments known as Hero Time for each character that help lift Shrek 2, such as a Crash Bandicoot-inspired dragon ride, or trying to get Shrek to clear out a pub full of drunken yobs, but these are too few, and too short.
Each character also has a special move, such as the Gingerbread Man's ability to lure enemies into traps with cookies, or Fiona's handy ability to freeze time, but they never really add anything to the experience and you can accomplish just about everything without once resorting to using them. So, it's back to the walloping of fluffy animals and the collecting of shiny penny pieces, while the game just seems to drift in front of your eyes, never once making a lasting impression. Go see the film instead.
SHREK SUPER PARTY
No more sophisticated than a freebie Shockwave game
Party - Issue 12 (January 2003) - 4.0/10
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TM00403E)
ShrekSuper.txtRead Review
Party games are a bit of a burgeoning genre on Xbox, with Fuzion Frenzy (Issue 01, 4.5), Loons: The Fight for Fame (Issue 08, 6.5), and more recently Whacked! (Issue 11, 7.5) all competing with traditional party pursuits like Spin the Bottle (Issue 04, 8.6) and Strip Twister (Issue 02, 9.7).
Being something of a party animal (are ogres animals?), Shrek's getting in on the act, and having a few party games with his mates: Donkey, Lord Farquaad, Princess Fiona and the like. There are only six characters, though, so if you ask us, Shrek's a bit too much of a Billy no-mates to even bother throwing a party.
And our favourite character from the film, The Gingerbread Man, is nowhere to be seen. It's a real shame. Given that one of the best things about the movie is the number of amusing peripheral characters, the game would have benefited from a bigger cast.
But there's a bigger problem, and it's to do with the party games themselves. They're really, really bad, with only a couple of exceptions. There are 30 different games to try. Some have you throwing various items at targets, or your opponents; others have you working together in pairs; some are simple races. In theory, there's a fair amount of variety on offer. But things are somewhat different in practice, thanks to the sheer lack of sophistication in any of the games. Control rarely requires more than the Left thumbstick plus the A button; and there's no subtlety or nuance of control that encourages replay. There's every chance that a lot of these games won't get played more than once.
Much of what's on offer here is no more sophisticated to play than the kind of freebie Shockwave games that are available on the internet. Even with a full complement of four players, the action is never engaging or addictive.
On the plus side, the Shrek theme is captured rather well, and the graphics have a nicely detailed, solid look about them. Leaving a few Shrek-obsessed young children with the game would keep them entertained for a while, but for anyone with any experience of games, there's really nothing to see here. Move along please...
SHREK SUPERSLAM
Entertaining 'comedy' beat 'em up with your favourite Shrek characters. No DOA but fun all the same
Beat 'em up - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 7.5/10
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AV07201W)
Shrekslam.txtRead Review
Princess Fiona was always a little bit 'kick ass' in the movies, so it's a wonder Shrek SuperSlam has only just reared its ogrish head. But no sooner can you say 'keep the franchise alive until the next movie comes out', along comes Shrek doing the DOA thing. Cheesy awfulness, right? Spanking goodness, actually!
Featuring just about every character from both Shrek movies, this is a beat 'em up along the same lines (but done much better) as Marvel Nemesis. You can duke it out in taverns, chuck enemies through windows or across the bar, or smash the ramparts of old castles apart.
There's lots of crazy-ass shenanigans going on in the background too, with super-strength power-ups popping up randomly (Donkey does super-kicks, Puss-in-Boots goes on a scratching rampage), and you can use weapons too. At one point we had to fetch a giant leg of ham in order to smash our enemy through a nearby window. You can also throw enemies through roofs or upstairs windows, only to wait a few seconds before they stagger back in through the downstairs front door, shaking rubble off themselves. Ah, that funny Shrek humour!
With three modes, there's plenty to keep you from getting bored. There's Melee mode, where four players can smash the place down and see who's the last left standing; Quest mode, where Shrek must travel the length of Far Far Away in order to rescue Fiona; and a single-player mode in which any character can fight his way through the game, taking on the multitude of other Shrek characters. From Prince Charming to the Gingerbread Man, they're all here.
We'd have liked to see a more controllable camera as it's pretty static and doesn't allow for too much close-up action, but with such a bright and batty Shrek universe to demolish, we didn't find ourselves caring that much anyway.
SILENT HILL 2: INNER FEARS
Best survival horror on any console and the creepiest game ever
Survival horror - Issue 8 (October 2002) - 8.4/10
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KN00403E)
SilentH2.txtRead Review
There are some towns you just wouldn't want to visit. Grozny in Chechnya, plagued by kidnap gangs and trigger-happy Russian soldiers. Milton Keynes, blighted by soulless concrete vistas and the lack of anything to do other than visit shopping malls.
We can now add Silent Hill to that list. With a permanent blanket of fog and population of gibbering monstrosities, it's the kind of place Lonely Planet doesn't sell a guide book for.
But, in the role of James Sunderland, go there you must. Your wife Mary has sent you a letter imploring you to meet her there. Your wife Mary, who has been dead for three years.
What we've got here is a port of last year's PlayStation 2 survival horror masterpiece. The game has been given an Xbox makeover, tidying up the visuals, with an all-new mini-adventure included, where you get to explore areas of the town that were closed off in the original.
In keeping with survival horror tradition, the game plays out in a third-person perspective and is bristling with brilliantly-drawn locations, devious puzzles and hideous monsters.
Things kick off with you as James at a motorway lay-by overlooking Silent Hill. He's alone and armed only with his dead wife's letter. You blindly set off down the path through the woods, which is when the mist descends and the noises begin. The thick, choking mist and the eerie, echoing noises accompany you pretty much through your entire stay, creating an atmosphere of foreboding that takes weeks to wash off.
Unlike other games of its type, Silent Hill 2 doesn't rely on constant fights or streams of unexpected shocks to make you jump and keep you interested. Instead, it creates a feeling of disorientating unease that grabs you firmly by the windpipe and hangs on until you find out just what the hell is happening in this damn town.
Keeping the cold hand of fear never far from your throat is a sparse, haunting soundtrack that has no equal. Strange, disembodied noises reverberate in the distance. Creepy music pipes up when you least want it to. James's radio erupts with static whenever danger is near. And when a stumbling zomboid comes at you from out of nowhere, a hideous, dissonant orchestra begins to play, sending shivers down your spine and right back up again.
Because once out among the deserted streets and tenements of the Hill, it's not long before you run into the town's undesirable denizens. And you'd better be ready - not for a fight, but for a fright. These are some of the most grotesque, freakishly foul monstrosities ever devised for a game. Contorted, shrieking humanoids apparently constructed from juddering offal. Ghoulish, twitching what-once-were-nurses grasping at your clothes and hair. Shambling mockeries of the human form that can only be described as balloon sculptures stuffed with sausage meat.
Disposing of these horrors is a brutal, unsophisticated affair in keeping with the down-to-earth realism of the game's lead character and the town of Silent Hill.
James Sunderland is no martial artist or weapons expert and most of the shambling fiends you encounter are not overly blessed in the brain department, merely stumbling towards you and whatever weapon you have to hand. If you're fortunate enough to have a handgun, the fights have the feel of summary execution. A few shots to put the beast down, and then a firm stamp of the boot into their spinal column to finish off.
Close-range fighting is yet more brutal. Even when the grotesque fiend in front of you has fallen to the ground, you stand over it, pummeling it to a pulp until the tell-tale pool of rapidly congealing blood assures you it won't be getting up for more.
Aside from the bloody carnage, the locations in the town and its surroundings look great. Nothing is pre-rendered and the camera is constantly shifting and altering position to increase the suspense. In most situations, you can hold down the Left trigger to force the camera to follow you from behind while at the same time using the Right thumbstick to look around, James's head and the beam from his pocket torch following it as you do.
Little touches like this are plentiful. Run for a while and James will pant like a racehorse when he stops. Walk into a room with something to pick up and his head will turn to look at the object. And as you walk on wooden floors, stone pavements or dusty paths, the sound of his footsteps changes to reflect the surface.
The first of the game's puzzles are straightforward but the later ones are seriously obscure. If you're anything like us then one or two will have you grinding your teeth and sweating in ignorance before you get that all-important flash of inspiration. Occasionally, the way the game presents the riddles and brainteasers is breathtakingly original, such as the time when a lift grinds to a halt, only for some kind of unearthly gameshow to pipe up from your radio, providing a vital clue to the puzzle up ahead.
As much as we love Silent Hill 2, we have to admit that it has shortcomings. For one, this is a conversion of a PlayStation 2 game that's almost a year old now. And despite the brilliantly drawn locations, the animation can be a little flaky at times, meaning it certainly can't compete in that department with titles such as Enclave (Issue 06, 5.8). Then there's the brooding pace at which the action moves. There are no set-piece shoot-outs or armouries of weapons to raid for firepower here.
On top of this, the game is short. With a little application you can have it licked in a touch over 11 or 12 hours; even the new Xbox-exclusive chapter only bolts on another three hours of gameplay or so. Not that this should put you off, but it means you might be better off renting for a weekend and whipping it in a couple of mammoth sessions.
But whatever its shortcomings, what you're getting here is still the best survival horror on any console, and quite possibly the creepiest game ever made. The only thing is - and we mean it - if you're of a sensitive disposition then think twice about buying this. Silent Hill 2 is the video nasty of the game world.
SILENT HILL 4: THE ROOM
Good puzzles and monsters, but lacks the variety and emotional intrigue of SH2 & 3
Survival horror - Issue 34 (October 2004) - 7.0/10
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KN03102E)
SilentH4.txtRead Review
When you come to Silent Hill, you expect to be surprised. Where else can you experience strange locals, exciting fairground rides, mysterious fog and monsters made from sausage meat, all in one visit?
At least during the first five minutes of The Room, you'll be very surprised. Not just because the game doesn't actually take place in the lakeside resort, but for the first time in the series, you're seeing the action from the first-person perspective.
For the past five days, Henry Townshend has been trapped in Room 302 of the South Ashfield apartment building. It's drab and gloomy, with chains blocking the door, a broken radio (typical!) and a miserable view onto Ashfield's main street. Exploring the room in first-person introduces a genuine sense of claustrophobia, especially as there's so little to do or interact with. Henry's only source of entertainment is a peephole through to the room of his sexy neighbour, Eileen Galvin.
You'll occasionally get a cryptic message stuck under your door, but it's not too long before you're yearning for adventure. Fortunately, the hole in your bathroom wall isn't a result of shoddy DIY, but a portal to a sinister parallel dimension. Entering the hole puts you hot on the trail of Silent Hill's most notorious serial killer, Walter Sullivan, and the game returns to the familiar third-person perspective.
Over-familiarity can be a real tension killer though, and soon the 'seen it all before' feeling oozes through like the damp in the corner of your room. It's the same old formula of solving some brilliantly realised puzzles and intermittently beating up writhing kebab monsters with an steel pipe.
But there are some innovations. Instead of the usual save points, holes in each level allow you to return home to save and rearrange your inventory. In an unnecessary twist of Resi Evil-style artificial difficulty, you can only carry a limited number of weapons and must return home to store items. More positively, some of the best puzzles require you to find an item in the other dimension and teleport back to the room to interact with it using real-world devices like the phone or tape recorder.
Although the new locations are suitably surreal - a sinister orphanage, a cylindrical prison and a creepy forest - there aren't as many cool things to look at or hidden documents to read, making it all feel a bit empty compared with SH2 & 3. Tragically, the second half makes you replay the locations but with the added burden of protecting a partially crippled Ms Galvin. Unlike Maria from SH2, Eileen fights for herself, but dodgy AI means she attacks the monsters with a vengeance when you just want to escape. Watching her attack monsters with a handbag provides much-needed light relief though.
Sadly, it's during combat that the series' dated gameplay really begins to crack. The only tweaks are a quick weapon select menu and a power bar that lets you charge melee attacks. Like the previous games, what really holds Silent Hill 4 together is the story. It's fantastically disturbing and the monsters are much sicker. Best of all though, is the ambient audio, which can rip out your spine and play it like a xylophone. Sadly, it's not enough to plaster over the dated graphics and gameplay, making this the weakest in the series. It looks like we're going to go back to our rooms and lock the doors, waiting for a true next-generation sequel to materialise.
SILENT SCOPE COMPLETE
A competent conversion that'll save you a fortune in £1 coins. Best played with a pad, not a lightgun
Shoot 'em up - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 7.0/10
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KN02602E)
Silent.txtRead Review
They say the Battle of Stalingrad was decided to some extent by the skill of Russian snipers. Things might have been different had the Germans had the chance to play the great Silent Scope arcade game.
Complete includes Silent Scope 1, 2 and 3, plus Silent Scope Ex, but as far as gameplay mechanics go, they're all pretty much identical. You play a square-jawed, elite government sharpshooter, albeit washed up/unstable/ loose cannon/fill in the clich?d blanks.
Accompanied by a hackneyed plot, each SS game involves you saving the world/rescuing the President/etc. Your path through each stage is more railed than the entire Tube network, but there is the chance between levels to choose the following stage, resulting in branching storylines and multiple endings, increasing replayability.
Forget lying prone after a silent insertion though, because this is sniping at its easiest. By holding the Left trigger, players move a target round the screen, and upon release this morphs into a highly magnified crosshair. You're against the clock, with time extensions granted on the completion of each setpiece and accuracy of your rounds, where head and body shots amass more seconds than a flukey leg kill. Complete boasts lightgun compatibility, but the tricky nature of combining accuracy with speed means, bizarrely, your controller is much more effective.
SS1 looks basic, and the tight time limits are demanding, while SS2 feels a bit more polished, but is weighed down by its bad script and voice acting. Loading takes a long time yet, annoyingly, the game can't be saved at any given point, so you have to play it right through to the end. An intelligent remedy to this is that each time you make relative progress before an untimely end, you'll unlock certain bonuses, such as extended lives and continues, which make the next time through a bit easier. Boss levels are suitably hard going, though if you get the rare opportunity of a clean headshot, things end pleasingly quickly.
SS3 and Ex move up a bullet calibre, as everything looks a lot slicker, though the cringe-worthy plots remain. It's vital to adjust the sensitivity of the crosshair before each stage - you may need to zip the target around the screen from atop a building, but slow things down for the helicopter-mounted stages when the crosshair shakes more than Ozzy on a wobble board.
Although a straight arcade port, Sniper Scope Complete provides quite a tidy little package, and the novel gameplay is certainly addictive. There are loads of stages and bonuses to unlock, but each game itself is relatively short. Scope this out if you've already spent a small fortune down the arcades and give it your best shot.
SKI RACING 2005
A bit too much of a novelty title without the replay value of other extreme sports games. Cheap thrills at £20
Sports - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 5.0/10
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JW00502E)
SkiRacing.txtRead Review
There's something manly about skiing. Maybe it's the thought you could shatter every bone in an instant. Ski Racing 2005 manages to get that feeling across; you bomb down the slopes at such velocity that you'd be hard pressed to play the game half-heartedly. All four events types - Slalom, Giant Slalom, Downhill and Super-G - demand your full concentration.
Controls are simple but there's still a massive margin for error. Carving between the flags at the right angle can shave seconds off your time, while a single slip-up can cost you the entire run. The Left trigger makes you lean backwards and slow down; the Right puts you in full pelt. When a marker looks out of reach, a press of X executes some last-ditch edging, but this can really damage your race time.
Graphically, the skier animation is competent enough, but the slopes lack the sexy bump-mapped textures of Amped 2 (Issue 23, 8.9) and the sparse background details add nothing to the realism. Thankfully, the sensation of speed does much to distract from the game's bland presentation. But unfortunately it can't hide the fact that there's only a few hours of gaming here. If you're an expert and win every event first time (which is unlikely), you'll move through all 18 slopes without much repetition. Fail to be a perfectionist and it'll take ages to work through the season, forcing you to replay the same events over and over until you have enough points.
Live scoreboards add a little incentive to stick with it, but not for too long. Ultimately the thing that kept us playing was the savage but comical crashes. The ragdoll effects are crazy! Ski Racing 2005 is fun for a while but is ultimately too simple to hold the attention for long. It doesn't come close to capturing the variety or the unpredictability of the real sport.
SKI RACING 2006
Robust, sturdy skiing game that's Live-enabled too. Does everything it says on the tin - but not much else
Sports - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 6.0/10
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SkiRacing2.txtRead Review
Occasionally a game comes along with so few pretensions, its honesty makes up for its weaknesses. It's like the big greasy northern pies like Gav has for his lunch every day, grey meat dripping in onions and gravy. Salt of the earth, and all that.
With various ski-themed races to undertake, with downhill, cross-country, and slalom modes, this is as cowbell-tastic as you can find. There's not a lot else going on - no fancy MTV soundtrack, no snowboarders. Just good old Ski Sunday action.
Gameplay, though straightforward, does have its diversions. You can power your chap up, giving him the chance to go faster (and he needs to when you see how slow he goes during the first stages), and you can deck him out in various different togs and skis. Beyond that, it's all downhill. Handling is, in keeping with the salt-of-the-earth theme, Yorkshire pudding-like. It can get a tad repetitive the 20th time you bomb down a slope, and that's not just because all the slopes look the same.
We can't see this appealing to many, but for the niche it was designed for, it works well. Oh, and a final word of warning - try not to crash. It may sound obvious, but those ragdoll physics are lame. Think Stephen Hawking falling off a slide.
SLAM TENNIS
Enjoyable and recommended, despite its few broken strings
Sports - Issue 6 (August 2002) - 7.2/10
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SlamT.txtRead Review
Summer is here. Honest. It's just a bit shy, that's all, hiding behind the quaint British traditions of cloud cover and patchy rain that we seem so reluctant to export. But when the sun does finally decide to get his bloody hat on, and show his face for those few glorious days of the year that we like to call summer, all will be forgiven.
Scantily clad ladies will be seen sauntering around wearing clothes made from stingy bits of string, and we'll all be cavorting about in the park playing Frisbee, football and tennis, having a gay old time.
Until then, though, you'll have to make do with the next best thing, and that's Xbox games involving football, tennis and scantily clad ladies. The footy we've got in the shape of FIFA, Red Card, Champ Man and ISS. Semi-naked females are a big part of DOA3.
This year, with Wimbledon still fresh in the mind, Slam Tennis is vying for a chunk of your game time, but how's the form?
Well, Virginia, anyone familiar with the excellent Virtua Tennis series in the arcade and on Dreamcast will be on well-worn turf with Slam Tennis, as it plays very much like a distant relative of Sega's classic.
Play is fairly slow and deliberate, especially compared to zippy, cartoony console tennis titles like Mario Tennis and Namco's Smash Tennis series. In those games, players exist outside the laws of physics, changing direction instantly and nailing cross-court backhands with a single button press.
Slam Tennis isn't as mad or as fast as these titles but, like Virtua Tennis, it still plays fluidly. But while it feels solid and intuitive within a few minutes of play, the overall package is not as refined or polished as the Sega series it's trying so hard to emulate.
The whole range of shots is at your disposal. Lobs, topspin, slices, drops, smashes and the rest can be performed with the face buttons, with the triggers used if required to add a bit of left/right swerve to the ball. While the handling is responsive - it captures the notion of wrong-footing your opponent extremely well - it's very difficult to hit the ball anywhere but forward. No matter how hard you attempt to return the ball at a deep and awkward angle, you'll almost always end up feeding it straight back to your opponent.
This game is hard, too. If you're playing a championship challenge, things become unforgiving and ruthless fairly swiftly. It's typical of the unfriendly difficulty curve of tennis games. The first few matches are always a breeze and then WHAM! - the next computer-controlled opponent is an unflappable, unflinching cyborg racquet master (there's no option available to reduce his/her difficulty level).
It's one thing developing your skills through practice, but some of the challenges posed by Slam Tennis ask a bit too much of the player, particularly during the early stages of the game when skills might be a bit raw.
While the player animation is of good quality (there's plenty of superfluous-but-entertaining stuff, such as players going for a lob but deciding to pull back at the last second when they realise it's out of reach), the visuals are shabby to say the least. Everything looks basic and rudimentary; the courts, the players and all things in-between. The crowd, for example, is a mess of pixels.
There's a decent amount of sporty presentation, however, with a good smattering of replay angles, and the crowd, although rough around the edges, knows when to make a noise. The umpire sounds like the nation's surrogate grandad Trevor McDonald.
Two more things: it's extremely hard to see the ball on a hard court due to them both being the same colour, and the multiplayer mode, as is the case with most tennis titles, is typically enjoyable. Four-player doubles is extremely addictive and entertaining.
So, should you holster your cash and wait for the imminent Fila World Tour Tennis to see you through the post-Wimbledon malaise and into the winter? Well, we don't know, and we won't be able to make a decent line call until we've had it in for review (maybe next month).
But if you do decide to invest in Slam Tennis, there's no puff of chalk - it's stout, playable, quirky, technically underwhelming and at times quite difficult. It comes recommended for unseeded newcomers to tennis games, but it might not set the world on fire for those reared on the likes of Super Tennis on SNES through to Virtua and Mario.
SNK VS CAPCOM: SVC CHAOS
For completists, a top technical addition to a collection. For the rest of us, it may be a bit too much to stomach
Screenshots - Beat 'em up - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 6.0/10
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SVCchaos.txtRead Review
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Apparently not happy with the way their characters were portrayed in Capcom Vs SNK (Issue 14, 7.7), the chaps at SNK have deemed it necessary to put the world to rights with their very own version.
The 36 characters read like a who's who of beat 'em ups from the early '90s; Streetfighter, King of Fighters and Fatal Fury all have representatives slugging it out in earnest. And unfortunately, earnest is all these 2D duellers can muster. We're all for revamped retro classics when done well, like the unbelievable transformation DOA2 underwent to triumph in DOA Ultimate (Issue 39, 8.8), and equally 2D fighters when executed with the panache of Guilty Gear X2: Reload (Issue 37, 8.4). However, SVC looks painfully dated. Super-pixellated characters and flat, uninteresting environments should be left back in 1993. Purists need only apply.
Yet this is where SVC does draw some strength. Ardent beat 'em fans will be wetting their karate suits at all the great touches on offer, with exclusive characters like Mega-Man, Shiki and Athena present. Combat is as deep as you want it to be, including the familiar SNK Guard Cancel attack and the new Forward Ground move, where combos can be interrupted with a quick forward double tap.
Enemy AI is top notch, so no sitting back and firing off range attacks. If you do succumb to Sagat's awesome power, several Continue options, like reducing the CPU's difficulty level and energy gauge, and increasing your Power gauge recovery time, are a great addition. SVC isn't going to win any new followers, but die-hard fans won't be disappointed.
SNIPER ELITE
A brutal, nasty, violent game about a million miles from Silent Scope. Difficult, yet extremely rewarding
FPS - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 7.8/10
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Sniper.txtRead Review
Halo purists and sniper-haters, look away now. This is going to hurt. Because the camping deathmatch-ruiners have been given their own game. The kind of game where no amount of running around like a clockwork Rambo, or lobbing grenades about like snowballs is going to stop them. They're watching you, and they've got your squashy little head lined up between their crosshairs.
We're surprised Sniper Elite even made it to the shops, given the amount of time it's taken to get there (we first saw it in 2002), but we're even more surprised that, despite nearly four years of being batted between publishers, it's still managed to emerge as a fine game.
As much of the game is spent staring down a telescopic sight, Sniper Elite has been designed to truly push you and make you feel the sweaty-palmed pressure of being a real-life sniper. The war-torn streets of Berlin and beyond are muted, brown places, which make it difficult to see rival snipers and other enemies. The lens itself takes a little time to focus on targets, and details usually overlooked in other games, such as heart-rate, breathing, distance to target and wind speed, all affect the accuracy of a bullet. If you've just run across a debris-littered street to find the perfect vantage-point, chances are you'll be out of breath for a short while, making your aiming erratic and inaccurate. You'll also have to be quiet, and move at a snail's pace to stand any real chance of surviving. If you're prepared to spend the majority of the game crawling through crap on your stomach, you'll find this quite the experience. But Sniper Elite rewards only the patient gamer - those after quick-kill thrills and whizz-bang gaming should look elsewhere.
Making a kill is particularly satisfying, though, rewarding you for pulling off hits with stunning slo-mo bullet-cam views. The whole game will slow down, the camera following the bullet across distances of nearly a kilometre into someone's head or chest, with your victim's face often contorting into pain and shock as they fly backwards to the ground, their brains and internal organs splattering everywhere. Lovely. Gas canisters on jeeps and tanks can be targeted too, with the vehicle often exploding and turning anyone even remotely close to it into a flaming ball of screams. It's not pretty.
The range of missions is also fairly wide, encompassing the shooting out of a parked jeep column, or using those belly-crawling skills to reach a wounded comrade, but it's when you're peering through your lens that Sniper Elite comes alive. We hear the developers had a real WWII sniper on hand to offer advice throughout, and it shows. It really is the most accurate depiction of a scope we've seen in a game, easily outstripping Halo's sniper mode or the arcade nonsense of Konami's Silent Scope. It rewards patience and cunning over meat-headed blasting, and if you can forgive the smudgy visuals and super-hard AI, those cracking skull-poppers will seem that much more satisfying. Not for everyone's tastes, but it's a refreshing slant on the FPS genre.
SOLDIER OF FORTUNE II: DOUBLE HELIX
Standard FPS that capitalises on gore. Clunky controls
First-person shooter - Issue 18 (July 2003) - 7.0/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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Soldier.txtRead Review
Never underestimate the value of blood and guts. The original Soldier of Fortune allowed you to get busy like a modern day Jack the Ripper and dismember enemies at will. Got a shotgun? Then blow the sucker's head off. Want to get sick? Then crouch beside a corpse and practice your knife work. Hands, arms, legs - all are fair game. You could even take bits of their faces off or hack at a limb to see the bone. SoF was the goriest FPS ever to hit the market and PC gamers loved it so much they placed it in the premiership of titles with Half-Life and Quake.
And now we have the sequel and the first Xbox appearance of lead character John Mullins in Soldier of Fortune II: Double Helix. And yup, you guessed it - it's the same bloody mix of body parts and bone fragments that made the first game so popular. But the thing is, we're just not that shocked anymore. Even if you're new to the franchise, after the first 30 minutes you'll start to become immune to the over-the-top bloodshed and once that's stripped away you're left with a pretty flat FPS that suffers from some very PS2ish graphics. If it wasn't for the inclusion of Xbox Live then it really would feel like a step back in time.
Graphics aside, the game doesn't fall down hard in any particular category, it's just the lack of polish means that the overall experience is lacking in excitement and style and really does play like an afterthought port. The levels are often drab and generic with you just piling through the only route available and shooting anything that moves. Even potentially exciting stuff like hanging out of an in-flight helicopter while letting loose with an M60 gets tedious because of the poor presentation.
The inclusion of Xbox Live and System Link options may well save this title from the mire of mediocrity - we'll take a proper look next month. But as a single-player game it falls short when compared with new kids on the block, Return To Castle Wolfenstein and Red Faction II. So if you like your games bloody and want to count bodies, not polygons, then it doesn't get messier than this.
SONIC HEROES
Beautiful and fast. Inventive levels and great bosses, but cheap deaths and bad camera let it down
Platformer - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 7.7/10
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Sonic.txtRead Review
Some things you can always rely on. Dr Robotnik will always be round, Green Hill Zone will always be strangely chequered and Sonic will always wear cheapo trainers with a 'don't care' attitude. One thing you could never rely on was that Sonic, exalted in the days of the MegaDrive, could still perform in today's 3D world. Sonic Adventure 1 & 2 were full of speedy setpieces but felt more like tech demos for Dreamcast than enjoyable games.
Sonic Heroes still features lengthy on-rails sections, but is now far more interactive thanks to a new team-based dynamic. There are four teams to choose from, each with three distinct members. Team Sonic is the traditionalists' choice, Team Rose is for newbies, Team Dark for experts, and the obscure team Chaotix for masochists. Rather than controlling each team member, you pick the leader and the other two will follow you under adequate AI control.
Each team has three formations, depending on which blobby critter is under your control. Sonic, Amy, Dark and Espio can sprint faster and execute light dash attacks in Speed formation. Tails, Cream, Rouge and Charmy take their teams into Fly formation which lets you hover for a limited time and jump much higher. Power formation is the one you'll use most often, though. Knuckles, Big, E-102 and Vector unleash baneful special attacks, taking out the baddest enemies as well as obstructions and brick walls.
With these powers in mind, Sonic Heroes plays a lot like a timed obstacle course. Knowing precisely when to change formation is the only way to achieve a good ranking. Being in Speed mode when there's a wall to traverse will cost you precious seconds. It's an original concept that gives Heroes the feel of a racing game rather than a platformer. Sadly, the awkward controls for changing formation mean you have to play tentatively when you really want to tear through.
Pressing the Y and B buttons cycles through the formations, often leading to confusion about which comes next. It would have been more intuitive to assign a separate button to each one. As it is, you'll either end up stopping and starting or fall to your death after a bad character switch. To make things worse, such a mistake will cost you all the rings and power-ups you've gained so far. Restart points are plentiful but to really achieve a high ranking you'll have to start from the beginning.
Practice makes perfect, and when you perfect your technique in Heroes you're rewarded with a hypnotic display of speed and graphical splendour. On-rails sections, such as the vertigo-inducing rollercoaster route to Eggman's hideout, are a visual and technical highlight, but they also lure you into a false sense of security. You'll die many, many times before you've learned the safe routes. Some of the devices that are meant to speed up your progress are another problem. Hoops, dash pads and cannons propel you forwards at great velocity, but it's often directly into the path of enemies.
The camera is mainly to blame for all this and is the biggest flaw. Aside from clipping right through the scenery, it fails to adjust to a high angle when you're flying. This makes it almost impossible to see where the ground is, or isn't. Adjusting the view yourself is possible but extremely cumbersome when you're already under pressure. Light dash attacks often send you flying off ledges because the camera is facing in the wrong direction. Missed attacks like this are the most aggravating and downright unforgivable aspect of Heroes, especially because they're supposed to lock on automatically.
Every cheap death has a cumulative effect, slowly wearing down your enthusiasm for the bright, attractive characters and worlds. Sonic Heroes is a game you'll start out loving and end up being fatigued by after replaying levels over and over. It's still an awesome graphical showcase and a vast improvement over the last two Sonic adventures, but there's still much work to be done before the spiky one is back to his peak.
SONIC MEGA COLLECTION PLUS
This bumper pack of game-shaping platformers can't be missed, especially at £20. Mega indeed
Screenshots - Platformer - Issue 39 (February 2005) - 7.5/10
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SonicMCP.txtRead Review
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A pinnacle in my teenage gaming years - Christmas Day, 1992, and I'd just fired up my brand new Sega Mega Drive. Gone were the days of finger crossing and whispering "Please load" at my Spectrum (any noise might disturb it). I spent the remainder of the day locked in my room, being blown away by the slick speed of Sega's spiky blue mascot.
Fast forward 13 years, and us lucky Xbox owners can relive the plinky pop years with this ace collection from Sega. Featuring every Sonic title ever conceived (a staggering 18 in all, from both Mega Drive and Game Gear platforms), including Sonic The Hedgehog 1, 2 and 3, Sonic & Knuckles and Sonic 3D Blast. As soon as the rings start chinging, you appreciate what fun and playable platformers they were, and indeed still remain to this day. Though a lot slower than we remember, these could still put a few Xbox titles to shame. The emphasis is just as much on exploration and collecting Golden Rings as speed, but we found ourselves recklessly blasting through levels in a bid to recapture our childhood excitement.
Whilst the other games do provide a ton of alternative excitement (the Mario Kart-esque Sonic Drift is a blast and Spinball features some zany levels), they can't really compare to the original four platformers in the series. Our pick of the bunch is Sonic 2, featuring superb, exhilarating level design and the choice of single-player or split-screen co-op, signalling the arrival of the ever-loveable Tails. There's tons of bonus material on offer including comic covers and illustrations, and the option to save your game at any point is a godsend. Old-skool maybe, but these are defining titles that younger gamers who missed out first time round really owe it to themselves to check out.
SONIC RIDERS
The supersonic hedgehog revs up for a spot of hover-board racing
Racing - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 4.9/10
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sonicriders.txtRead Review
When gaming mascots turn to novelty kart racers in a desperate attempt to 'do a Mario', it's usually a sign that all is not well. And although the karts have been replaced with surfboards - there's no tarmac to trample or motorways to mow through - Sonic Riders hardly bucks the trend for average kart-based capers. It's Sonic and co surfing the skies, but it's not done with any style or flair, sadly.
You'll be catapulting off a huge spider's web, riding a giant centipede and getting shot hundreds of feet through the air by a crossbow. Sounds thrilling, except it isn't really. There's a clever gimmick too, of course - each stage has multiple routes and shortcuts to take, depending on your racer's category (Speed, Fly or Power). Speed types can grind twisting rails, Flyers use hoops to shoot through the air and Power riders can smash through walls to discover secret paths. Hitting A at the right time on a ramp causes your rider to do a huge jump, allowing you to pull off stunts to charge up your Air bar, which powers your board.
Or course, no Sonic game is complete without Dr Eggman, and as usual he's after those Chaos Emeralds. Story mode sees him setting up a tournament to determine the fastest racer. Of course, Eggman does nothing without a world-dominating motive, so he gets competitors to pay one Chaos Emerald each to race. It could have been a pioneering set-up for a Sonic game, but it just ends up as little more than tit-for-tat arguments between Sonic and Eggman's team of racers.
Unfortunately, the gameplay is just as disappointing. For some stupid reason, the board's natural speed is much slower than Sonic if he just got off and walked, and that's just not right. To pick up the pace, you have to ride the turbulence streams (tubes of wind) created by a racer ahead. Once you're inside a stream, you can perform stunts that fill up your Air bar.
Your control is completely taken away during these on-rails sections, though, thus sapping the already small amount of fun you'll be having. You can manually recharge your Air by spinning the Left stick, but apart from that all there is to do is watch as your rider splashes down a waterfall towards the next section before full control is resumed.
The handling, during the bits where it actually lets you control your rider, is also unresponsive, an unforgivable flaw in the superfast futuristic racer genre. It's almost as if the gameplay was made with different tracks in mind. The walls are unavoidable, and you'll find it difficult to complete a course without falling off.
Multiplayer tries its best to save the day, though. Up to four mates can enjoy bouncing each other into the walls, but surprisingly there's no Live support. Aside from standard racing, look out for Tag mode, where teams of two share the same Air bar in a race to the finish. Nothing groundbreaking, but at least there's some fun to be had.
Overall, though, with its fundamentally flawed handling, glitchy physics and a tendency for the game to just play itself, Sonic Riders is a huge disappointment. We were hoping for high-speed thrills to rival any futuristic racer, but instead it's a sluggish ordeal of wall-bashing frustration. Sonic Riders should be damned to the bargain bucket with Crash Tag Team Racing (Issue 50, 4.9).
SOUL CALIBUR II
The most fluid fighter ever. Easy to pick up, tough to master, graphically superb
Beat 'em up - Issue 21 (October 2003) - 9.1/10
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Soul2.txtRead Review
Nearly four years have passed since Namco released the original Soul Calibur on Sega's Dreamcast, a shining knight of a game in terms of graphics, playability and style. Together with Virtua Tennis, it contributed to keeping Sega's console on life support but couldn't save it from the plug eventually being pulled. Back to the present and, while the blue swirl has long since been replaced by a green X, have we as discerning games players also really changed with the times?
The answer, although many of us would like to think we've grown up and become able to define the wheat from the chaff is, in reality, no. We still like the same type of games - we just like to see continual developments and improvements. But one genre that hasn't really moved with the times is the beat 'em up. It should have soared into the stratosphere three years ago, but it didn't.
Sure, Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance (Issue 13, 7.8) and Tao Feng: Fist of the Lotus (Issue 16, 8.2) are fine games, but are you still playing them now? Chances are, probably not. Dead or Alive 3 (Issue 01, 8.5), did wonders to showcase the graphical prowess of Xbox but still highlighted some fiddly control issues as the combat just didn't seem to flow the way it should. It seems the beat 'em up genre has been racing two steps forward and one step back with no real signs of bucking the trend... that is, until now. Soul Calibur II has arrived.
It's set amongst the incidental backdrop of travelling various lands to retrieve Soul Edge - a huge cyclopic sword containing more evil than all the Exorcist movies put together. The two-part (Normal and Extra stages) saga follows a mystically daft plot, which attempts to feel like Fist of the North Star but reads like a bad translation of Homer's Iliad. But forget the story - it's all about the gameplay.
The 20 fighters (five of which are hidden) take in the broadest of influences, from the original denizen of pirate evil Cervantes and his successor, the Soul Edge-slashing Nightmare, to newbies such as Necrid (a fiendishly brilliant creation capable of dynamically morphing his weapon into those of others) and Todd McFarlane's axe-spinning ex-CIA agent Spawn as the exclusive Xbox bonus. You are not simply limited to a collection of ninjas or the usual out-world-roaming freaks - the fighters are as diverse as they are plentiful.
Strictly speaking, all the characters are unique although some heavy hitters like Nightmare and Astaroth (imagine Street Fighter's Zangief has eaten Eddie Honda, choked to death and returned from hell with a blue tinge and a bloody great big axe) can carry even the most novice player through the early stages of all modes. The learning curve soon hots up though, no more so than in Weapon Master mode (the story mode) when you're faced with specific tasks, such as low gravity fights (where you can only harm your opponent in the midst of a flying combo) or facing a ridiculously short time limit (the only chance of winning the bout being a speedy ring out).
Graphically, the developer has really gone to town with the character art. Three different costumes for each character, tiny details like hair movement, Astaroth's beating heart pounding through his chest and neon light trails begin where DOA3 left off, only this time with a fluidity of movement that sets a new standard.
Character playability is second to none. Each fighter has different speeds and attacking range coupled with a multitude of special weapons techniques. You can use fakes to throw your opponent off the scent of a routine attack and conjure up endless freeform combos that succeed through perfectly responsive character dynamics.
Using the horizontal, vertical and circular strike system, both with and without weapons, makes getting into a basic fighting rhythm easy. It also provides a graduated jump onto advanced techniques such as parries, throws and powered-up moves, accessed by holding down the Right trigger. Causing harm to your opponent in later levels of the Weapon Master mode could be limited to a particular attack or defensive technique - some characters even take on invisibility. Similarly, your fighter could be handicapped by diminishing health or having an ineffective guard for the opponent's chosen weapon. Combat offers great sophistication, but wraps it in an intuitive and highly responsive control system.
As for your surroundings, backgrounds and arenas are exceptionally detailed with running water, stunning atmospheric lighting and great shadows. While nowhere near as interactive as the multi-level street battles of DOA3, Soul Calibur II's environments are plentiful and beautifully drawn. Dungeon levels harbour landmines, lava rings or quicksand and, with the inclusion of a number of fully walled arenas, Namco has made sure that progression through the game is down to lightning-fast brain power not just muscle-bound brawn or the size of your weapon (although that certainly helps).
Enemy AI is fairly challenging on certain levels, but once you've given Soul Calibur II a week of solid play, any difficulty bar Extra Hard shows repetitive cracks as you can spot attacks coming from routine stances a mile off. Minor gripe over, the title more than makes up for this slight lapse by its constant expansion in Extra Arcade, Survival, Time Attack and Versus modes, where you can use weapons gleaned in the Master mode to inflict all manner of pain on your prey. It is in Extra Versus mode where the longevity of Soul Calibur II really lies, as fighting another human opponent throws in the element of surprise, making this without doubt the most in-depth and satisfying two-player beat 'em up the Xbox has ever seen.
If you like fighting but prefer to sustain virtual injuries rather than painful broken bones, then buy this game. It's the new benchmark beat 'em up on Xbox.
SPARTAN: TOTAL WARRIOR
A gladiatorial epic that'll make your fingers bleed - this is endurance gaming at it's finest
Hack 'n' Slash - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 7.6/10
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Spartan.txtRead Review
The Creative Assembly is famed for creating the world-class Total War strategy series on PC. However, the only strategy required in Spartan: Total Warrior is the frantic button-mashing kind. Leave your brain at the door and lube up those fingers, because they're going to get one hell of a workout. If you don't, you'll end up with repetitive strain injury. It'll be interesting to see if they put an RSI warning in that part of the game manual that everybody ignores.
Crippling finger conditions aside, Spartan is all about epic battles, and the UK-based developer has done a great job making the graphics pack a seriously hard visual punch. Backing up the looks is a plot that serves up more mythical monsters than Jason and the Argonauts for you to hack and slash at. You play the Spartan, hailed as the saviour of Sparta, the bit of Ancient Greece he's from. All the pressure of saving your fellow men, women, children and chickens from the evil Romans and the odd pack of rabid barbarians comes with a price, though. And it's a reassuringly expensive price that your right hand is going to pay dearly for.
Spartan's opening level throws you straight into a furious battle, which pretty much sets the stage for the entire game. You can't help but smile when you hear the cries of hundreds of little men running to meet the enemy head-on in a sword-slashing fight to the death. It's one of those moments where you have to look around to find someone to share it with. If there's no one behind you, go fetch your mum and dad. They'll love it.
With over 160 units on screen at once - all going mental at the same time - it can be quite hard to see where your character is or what he's doing. The Spartan blends into the background of blood and gore perfectly, and you'll only figure out where he is after pulling off a special move that chops off the heads of those around him. It's the buckets of blood and flying noggins that give it away.
Combat isn't really the art form that Russell Crowe made it look like in Gladiator. Repeatedly hammering the life out of the B button makes your man wave his sword around like some sort of lunatic. You can perform shield blocks and thrusts with the triggers, which are more useful than they sound. These defensive moves are vital when you're surrounded and need a bit of breathing space.
Belting your enemies with the shield knocks them back, giving you enough space to get a grip of the situation. The more heads that roll the quicker you fill up your bloodlust meter. By clicking down on the thumbsticks you can perform special moves that'll take out handfuls of enemies at once. These moves depend on what sort of weapon you're clutching at the time, with different attacks suited to different situations.
Spartan's combat isn't all about swords, though - there's a little sorcery thrown in there for good measure. Which magical mega-move you pull off depends on what weapon you're holding, and these pack a much bigger punch. Of course, some very pretty lighting effects accompany all the magic attacks. It just wouldn't be right otherwise. And if all this hacking, slashing and magicking isn't enough, you also have the option to whip out a bow and fire arrows all over the place too. Spartan is brimming with intense, frantic, repetitive button-mashing action.
Each completed level takes you closer to becoming a legend in your own right. Smooth cut-scenes let you know what your next challenge is (though they all pretty much involve killing hundreds of Romans), but there are a few objectives scattered around each level that have to be completed before you can move on. Taking out guard towers and blowing up walls become second nature after a few levels. But every now and then you come up against a boss of truly mythic proportions.
You won't tire of all these epic battles, but your fingers certainly will. Spartan is possibly the finest example of endurance gaming yet made. Sure, it looks great and a lot of time, effort and liberties have obviously gone into the mythology and plot, but where are the epic strategy-driven battles that formed the meat and veg of movies such as Gladiator and Troy?
You might face several armies'-worth of foes at once, but you never get to command your own, and you don't get to call formations and tactics - surly the best bit - as the AI does all that for you. It's just you against the entire Roman army. We're sure we heard our Xbox laughing at us during some of the more intense button-bashing moments. Spartan is great fun, but we can't help but feel a little disappointed that the mighty Assembly's console debut isn't much more than a pretty-looking Dynasty Warriors.
SPAWN: ARMAGEDDON
A competent action game that stays faithful to the source material but is ruined by an awful camera
Shoot 'em up - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 6.9/10
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Spawn.txtRead Review
Comic book adaptations haven't fared particularly well in their cellulose-to-Xbox transition, with the only exception being the outstanding XIII (Issue 23, 9.0). Spawn, the most famous of illustrator Todd McFarlane's comic creations, already has one movie adaptation and a couple of last-gen games under the belt of his living, symbiotic costume, so will Armageddon turn out to be the prophetic end of him?
Initially events seem quite promising. The back-story of our anti-hero is played out through some great-looking cutscenes, smattered with McFarlane's customary dark and stylish flair. Spawn, previously an elite government assassin in life, is brought out of hell so he can see his wife once more, but must fight for the devil in the war between good and evil. A Necroplasm weapon has been fired on a near-future New York, and a portal to hell opened. Now you must fight for your survival, and that of the world...
Fans of the comics will immediately identify with the look of the game, as a suitably dark and gritty atmosphere is well conveyed, and having McFarlane advise on the development process has paid off. Your path is guided by green talisman waypoints, which, when touched, turn red and act as markers of your progress. However, these are made redundant by the linear gameplay, as our hero is limited as to where he can and can't go, and the old invisible-wall syndrome frequently curtails the potentially expansive environments.
Spawn has Necroplasm attack powers, which must be replenished by collecting plasm orbs. We're all for having some degree of help, but these are frequently laid out directly along the path you must take, like some hellish form of Hansel and Gretel. Whilst movement is mostly running and jumping, Spawn's chains come in handy as grappling hooks, allowing you to zip around the (admittedly small) area of a level, and his cloak provides a useful Glide option.
There are some winning touches. Hand-to-hand combat is achieved with his trusty axe, Agony, and although there aren't really any combo options, there is a liberal smattering of blood and gore. A large arsenal of weapons is at Spawn's disposal, including madcap machine-guns, brimstone cannons and a triple-barrelled rocket launcher, and these can all be upgraded with Soul Orbs, collected from slain enemies. However, your original chains are still the most effective weapons with the lock-on function.
The action never lets up either, and the bosses are huge and detailed, but the camera is an issue. How many times is a third-person actioner ruined by a camera getting stuck behind walls, randomly zooming in and out and limiting your view? Armageddon is guilty on all counts.
Spawn isn't the greatest comic book translation ever, but it's certainly fun for a couple of days. Unleash him if you dare.
SPEED KINGS
Burnout on bikes. Stylish game - everything looks and feels sweet
Driving - Issue 18 (July 2003) - 8.0/10
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Speed.txtRead Review
Whilst sweeping generalisations and ill-fitting comparisons are usually just a well-worn crutch for the lazy reviewer, occasionally there are titles that
really can be helpfully condensed into a three-word synopsis. Speed Kings makes the mini review simple: Burnout on bikes.
The arcade racer's been making a welcome return to gaming's centre stage and the success of Burnout (Issue 04, 8.2), both critically and at retail, has inspired Acclaim to extend the formula to the two-wheeled menace machines so beloved of leather-wearing macho types. And, thankfully, that formula has remained largely intact as right from the off the watchword here is fun. Speed Kings is at once exhilarating and demanding and, as with its spiritual four-wheeled forefather, weaving in and out of the traffic, albeit now on a huge powerbike, is pure gaming at its best.
The settings for the courses are all street based and as you progress through the game you will enjoy tearing up residential areas as diverse as New England and London. There are a good number of ways to race but the meat of the game circles around the, er, Meet mode: a championship of sorts but, due to the illegal nature of the street races, it's not called such. Each meet is a series of three races where the player competes against five other riders and tries to earn enough placing points to unlock the next meet.
For players who have been weaned on Burnout the game will feel unnaturally harsh, mainly due to the fact that it's much harder to fall off cars than bikes. In fact, you'll spend an awful lot of time bouncing on your backside along the Tarmac as you struggle to tame the beast between your legs and it will be a few bruises down the line before you're completing laps without taking a tumble. But the virtue of two wheels rather than four is the developer has been able to introduce some very neat tricks. By far the most stylishly enjoyable is the powerdown move. Should an unsuspecting HGV cross your path, simply hit the powerdown button to slam your bike onto its side and skid underneath the offending lorry. It's a great idea that looks dramatic and feels fantastic.
The levels are interactive and you'll have to respond to environmental challenges on the fly. For example, when traversing the Swiss Alps stage later in the game, you'll encounter a landslide that must be dodged. A boost gauge can be filled by performing various dangerous stunts mid-race, ranging from punching rival riders off their bikes la Road Rash to surfing on your bike at obscenely fast speeds. Firing off your boost will see all other vehicles become coloured blurs and the feeling of successfully weaving between them at supersonic speed is something the real driving simulators simply can't replicate.
Because players will be falling of their bikes with alarming regularity, Climax has included perhaps the most severe case of catch-up we've ever seen. This is a mixed blessing as, on the one hand it keeps the races exciting ensuring that the field never becomes overly spaced out, but on the other you'll always feels that no matter how well or badly you drive, success or failure is never far off. Overall this is a sublime package that, whilst labouring under the newly released Burnout 2's (Issue 17, 9.0) considerable shadow, could nevertheless become a serious sleeper hit.
SPHINX AND THE CURSED MUMMY
Gorgeous, huge and inventive. Starts slowly but impresses midway with some nice surprises
Platformer - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 8.1/10
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Sphinx.txtRead Review
Sand-swept and smelling slightly like camels, Egypt has captured the imagination of adventurers for an age. From Indiana Jones to Sid James, all the greats have trodden its barren soil.
Games developers have often called upon Egyptian mythology for inspiration, but none have ever made the act of heart pickling, infant sacrifice and enforced embalming so accessible. Enter Eurocom. They're old hacks at turning the soft-focus lens on everyday terrors. Remember their nightmarish, dirty old man romp called 40 Winks? Sweet as cherry pie.
Sphinx and the Cursed Mummy is the tale of one boy and his withered, vacant-eyed corpse friend, Mummy (actually a young prince usurped from the throne by his elder brother). Cursed, embalmed and wrapped in bandages, he's cast into the dungeons to rot forever, saved only by a sprinkle of Eurocom magic dust and the need to make the game longer than ten minutes in length. Sphinx and Mummy embark on a quest to secure the throne and restore the peace that's inevitably lost when larcenist loonies take over.
The backbone of the game is the episodic nature of its missions, a real strength that defines Sphinx amongst its peers. Once either character has completed their objective, the story shifts to the other, and into a different genre. Mummy relies on stealth and puzzle solving, while Sphinx takes the more hands-on approach of murdering everything demi-god style (with a pinch of RPG thrown in for good measure). This interchanging of rules keeps the pace and story vibrant. Using cliffhangers to sew each episode together also keeps you hanging on and eager to progress.
After eight hours of play you'll still find yourself learning and discovering hidden talents. Sphinx earns a blowpipe for offing enemies from afar, plus the ability to capture and train animals for his own ends. Equally, Mummy learns the arcane art of invisibility, or douses himself in fuel, only to become a walking torch, as in Voodoo Vince (Issue 22, 7.9).
Although both characters eventually end up as contenders for the undead Olympics, it takes an age for them to get there. The earliest levels are poor and too explanatory. They chew over every aspect of what you're supposed to do before letting you get on and do it. These levels are devoid of imagination, too. There's something distinctly last-gen about them that doesn't sit right with the rest of the game, and this could put you off. Do try, though. You'll be wandering the halls of Mummy's palace dumbfounded at the pretty vacuity of it all for some time before you chance upon a secret panel or revolving door. Like we said, stick with it, you'll find them.
Another grumble is the lack of vocal talent. Grunting and moaning instead of speech is lazy. It would have added so much more zest if the dozens of characters you encountered actually spoke, but then, who's going to want to spend time with a dead guy whose eyes are being eaten by maggots? Well, chances are, despite the earlier levels, you'll want to do just that. It's not the most groundbreaking, tomb-shattering treat to grace the Xbox, but what it does, it does with constant flair. Look beyond the slower-than-slow start and you'll find yourself gazing upon a wonder. Perhaps not a wonder of the ancient world, but a wonder nonetheless.
SPIDER-MAN 2
Huge environment to explore: you'll be smashing and swinging in no time. Missions a bit repetitive
Platformer - Issue 32 (August 2004) - 8.6/10
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SpiderMan2.txtRead Review
At the end of his first blockbuster movie, the web-slinging wonderkid declared: "With great power comes great responsibility." He wasn't wrong either; this year's Spider-Man 2 movie will probably break all box office opening records, and as such Activision has a great responsibility to deliver a worthy videogame accompaniment. Fans of the first film would no doubt have lapped up the ace original game Spider-Man: The Movie (Issue 04, 8.0), yet SM2 takes a much more free-roaming path through the streets of New York, and we're pleased to say it's all the better for it.
The narrative intro is a bit superfluous if you've any concept of the Spidey phenomenon (and let's face it, who doesn't), though it does give Tobey Maguire and co the chance to earn a bit of extra cash on the side - in fact all the characters from the film are voiced by their respective thesps, adding great authenticity to the game. Spidey's a bit older now so has a bit more freedom to hang out late and pick up girls. More freedom in a literal sense too, because Spidey now has an entire scaled replica of New York City at his sticky fingertips.
All the recognisable landmarks are present, from Staten Island to the Chrysler Building and, of course, The Daily Bugle. A full-on, living, breathing, dynamic city is now your potential playground, and Spidey can explore to his heart's content from street level right up to the highest point in the city, the top of the Empire State Building. Spidey can literally climb up and over every single physical object, and the massive free-roaming environment is an absolute joy to explore.
This is complemented by a fantastic new swing technique, aided by a much more natural and satisfying physics system. The Right trigger still squirts magic white goo from Spidey's wrist, though this time your whippy web string will actually attach to a physical object, be it a building, tree, lamp-post or hovering helicopter. Gone is the invisible ceiling of the original game that saw our arachnid float along between rooftops, now you'll fall until your cord catches onto something. Holding the Left trigger at the base of your swing gives Spidey extra momentum during his pendulum motion, and releasing at the peak of the swing (A button) catapults the red-suited avenger way up into the stratosphere. It's possible to cover massive distances in one go using this graceful and fluid technique - vital for some of the tougher timed missions. This is a hugely enjoyable experience on the player's part, and the camera comes into its own by snaking along the streets and rooftops behind the character, really immersing players in Spidey's world and making them feel like Peter Parker taking his first, tentative suspended steps.
To accompany this free-roaming environment, the gameplay is suitably non-linear for the most part. As you canter through the huge city, your Spidey sense will tingle and you'll be alerted to a random street crime. These are entirely optional, often cropping up whilst you're en route to a main objective, and you've got the choice of undertaking these missions that include intervening in armed robberies, rescuing a dangling construction worker, or halting a stolen car. Whether you intervene or keep on moving, combat plays a huge part in Spider-Man 2, and has been significantly tweaked from the original game. A whole wealth of web- and fist-based combos are on offer, through the X and Y buttons, with B providing a rather handy dodge function whenever your Spidey Sense tingles. The complex combat actually requires a bit of thought and strategy, and is tactically more akin to a competent beat 'em up rather than standard actioner button-mashing.
It's important to carry out a certain number of these missions however, because doing your duty to the city results in hero points. They might not mean prizes but they certainly enable Spidey to purchase the numerous upgrades from the Comic Book Store. There's no fat sci-fi geek behind the counter but there is numerous swing, combat and health upgrades that make Spidey that bit stronger, helping on his quest. As well as beefing up the webslinger, these upgrade points play a vital role in unlocking further story missions. Initially fun, they quickly begin to grate, becoming very repetitive, very quickly. Fair enough if there was a separate roaming mode, but you get to the stage where you just want to get on with the story without faffing around earning the required few thousand points first.
And so on to the story then. Peter Parker is feeling the strain of being a superhero; his studies are failing, he's distancing himself from Mary Jane, though through OsCorp he does meet the brilliant Dr Otto Octavius. Like the film, he goes on to become Spidey's main adversary, though you'll have to fight through a fair number of irksome random missions to get your fix of the Octopussed outlaw.
And, it would be fair to say, that's the only real gripe we've got with Spider-Man 2, but it is a fairly major one. We love the idea of a completely free-roaming environment, but when you just want to hammer the intriguing (especially if you haven't seen the film) story, it's more of a hindrance than a joy. The swing system is fantastic and totally immersive, and it's a real joy to hare round the great-looking cityscape. The random missions, delivered by rather rough-looking generic characters, genuinely detract from the real game, and though paving the way for non-linear gameplay, are a bit much. But try not to get too bogged down in these, and we're left with an incredibly fun and authentic Spidey experience; just master the swing technique and you'll be content to fly around for hours, and the fantastically fast camera adds to the enjoyment. Pull on the mask and take Spider-Man 2 out for a spin - you won't be disappointed.
SPIDER-MAN: THE MOVIE
Highly enjoyable use of a licence; crackles with superhero smarts
Platformer - Issue 4 (June 2002) - 8.0/10
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SpiderMan.txtRead Review
Who doesn't want superpowers these days? Who wouldn't want to mow the lawn with their thoughts, knock bouncers down with a twitch of their little finger or leap supermarket queues in a single bound? Everyone loves a superhero.
Ask one what they do and they'll go on about championing the meek and defenceless, protecting Joe Public by retaining a sense of the everyman while battling evil from under the claustrophobic spectre of a 24-hour Big Brother society. But that's just a cover - what they really love is picking up cars like they were croissants, kicking ass and shooting beams of pure plasma out of many (if not all) of their bodily orifices. All that 'moral crusader' stuff's just so people don't get too jealous.
Spider-Man is one of the holy trinity of truly legendary superheroes along with Superman and Batman. But if these three were in a band, Spidey would simply have to be the lead singer. Why? 'Cos he's the most entertaining. Batman has the gadgets, Supes has the jawline but Spider-Man always has the fun. And that's what a good superhero video game should be all about - tooling the players up with powers, pointing them in the right direction then letting them loose on a criminal underworld populated by dumb goons and supervillains.
Just like the original Spider-Man game on PSone and Dreamcast, the Xbox version of this summer's movie realises Peter Parker's spider powers extremely well. All the powers are here and you're given a liberatingly free reign of control over them. Spidey sticks to pretty much any surface and can crawl from wall to ceiling and vice versa in an effortlessly smooth manner. Just, in fact, like a spider can.
It's easy to forget just how many kooky arachnid talents the main man possesses. While we were playing a later level that involved infiltrating the Oscorp building, we kept trying to sneak past the security cameras in a Solid Snake style. But then we finally thought "hang on - this is Spider-Man!" So we Web-zoomed to the roof, and strolled along it on all fours... simple. How embarrassing that we thought in a mere two dimensional, confined-by-floor sort of way. It's this great use of superhero abilities that makes Spider-Man: The Movie a slick and enjoyable game to play.
Spidey has an entire repertoire of powers to aid his battles against the Green Goblin, Shocker and The Vulture in sky-high scraps. In a plot that sticks fairly close to the movie, you're taken through the seedier pockets of NYC, from subways and sewers through criminal hideouts, to shiny corporate science labs and out onto the rooftops of the gleaming city skyline. The game mixes the set pieces with varying styles of play. Some tasks require full-on combat, others can be avoided with the shrewd use of shadow-hopping stealth. Certain levels see Spidey defending the innocent, while others see him pursuing the bervillains over and around the skyscrapers.
It's all refreshingly paced, too, with the 24 levels coming in short, punchy bursts. There are no mid-level save points, but this is only frustrating during one of the earlier levels that expects you to trash multiple goons before facing an end of level boss with a shotgun... mess it up and you're back to the start again. But subsequent levels all occur in lovely, digestible bite-size chunks. You're privy to a quick snippet of cut-scene for plot advancement, given something to hit/kill/find/save, and off you go.
Which brings us to the main flaw in Spider-Man: The Movie the game. It's not very long. On Easy, we hurtled through it in just under four hours. And while harder difficulties do provide a greater challenge, they crumble with just a little persistence. But while not having the greatest length, the game does have a fairly generous girth with plenty of pleasing additions throughout.
At the end of every level, for example, you're awarded points for speed, secrets uncovered and combat style in a performance evaluation. These are totted up and stored in a bonus account, which you can then spend unlocking new features and crazy costumes. For the completist then, it's not just about web-blasting your way through - you have to take a fair bit of pride and consideration to see the full selection of what developers Treyarch have put in place.
The second ladder in Spider-Man's tights is a handling glitch that seems to come into effect whenever you try to move both Spidey and the camera. It's a little tricky to explain but we'll try anyway, so put on your science hats, class...
Your character moves in the direction you point the analogue stick - think Super Mario 64, or any other 3D platformer. But spin the camera around, and Up suddenly becomes 'walk forward' (like Resident Evil, or Tomb Raider), so Spidey continues moving in that direction. You'll have to let go of the thumbstick for the control to reset itself to the new camera position. This may be intentional, but it feels clumsy in practice, especially for those clever player-director types who like to fiddle with the camera on the fly as the action dictates.
You could take the visuals to task, too, but you'd have to be a truly bitter villain with mole-like vision not to be impressed by some of the views on offer. For while interior levels can look ropey, the web-swinging scenes set atop the NYC penthouses are spectacular. Open-air boss battles consisting of continuous mid-air warfare, look and feel epic and magnificent. It's the stuff movies and comic books are made of.
So while it's not without flaws, Spider-Man is a thoroughly entertaining use of an at-one-time abused licence. It's a game where levels feel more like playgrounds than obligatory scripted events and where boss encounters are cool clashes instead of near-impossible obstacles. Creators of movie-game tie-ins would do well to play this to realise how a cash-in can also be rake in some fans as well as the cash.
You'll believe a man can walk up walls, and picking up the pad is as close as most of us will ever get to squeezing into a Lycra suit and squatting on top of a cupboard.
SPIKEOUT: BATTLE STREET
Perfect one-night rental fodder for fans of Double Dragon, but very limited in all other respects. Terrible split-screen multiplayer.
Screenshots - Beat 'em up - Issue 43 (June 2005) - 4.8/10
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Spikeout.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




Welcome to the year 1987. Not a bad year, all things considered. Mel Gibson was busy tearing up cinema screens in cop-on-the-edge thriller Lethal Weapon, religious envoy Terry Waite discovered to his own cost what happens when you poke your nose into one Beirut terrorist camp too many and Michael Jackson had just released his third album Bad (oh, the irony!).
And the best bit? 1987 was the year Double Dragon burst onto the arcade scene - and we went mad for it, frankly. Remember? The staggeringly original (for it's time) scrolling beat 'em up where you walked a bit, beat some people up, walked a bit more then beat some more people up before facing off against a horribly muscle-bound boss dude? Ah, the number of school lunches we spent bombing down the chip shop just to shovel our lunch money into the sweaty Double Dragon machine in the corner...
So why all this slightly leftfield reminiscing? Because playing Sega's Spikeout Battle Street puts us strangely in mind of those halcyon days of Double Dragon yore. Here we are, in 2005, and we're still playing a scrolling beat 'em up where you walk a bit, beat some people up, walk a bit more then beat some more people up before facing off against a horribly muscle-bound boss dude. Progress? Hardly.
And yet we still there's a hint of that old Double Dragon thrill to be had as we strolled down yet another dodgy side street, pounding thug after identical thug. Perhaps it's a case of simple minds enjoying simple things, but you can't help but be drawn to a game that lets you become a 15 year old school girl with a foot long crowbar in her fist and the ability to perform high flying martial arts in six inch stiletto hills. No? Just us then.
The problems start once you take this ten minute, ten pence a go, throw away helping of fun out of its native arcade setting and force it onto the home console, because the result, typically, is a one-dimensional fighting game that you'll play once, finish, then barely touch again. And with that, your honour, the prosecution rests its case.
Because, while we'll be the first to throw our hands in the air and admit we enjoyed playing the impressively slick Spikeout Battle Street for the first fifteen minutes or so, there just no excuse for this kind of one dimensional gameplay when you've just forked out thirty quid for a game. But that's the crux of the problem: scrolling beat 'em ups are rarely good value for money, and it's even more a slap in the face when - as is the case with Battle Street - they're not even that good an example of the genre in the first place.
It's a pity, because all the vital scrolling beat 'em up elements are here - impressively bulky men with names like Tenshin and Jackal; ludicrously bouncy fighting ladies; endless streams of identical looking bad guys in bomber jackets; a ridiculous story based around an evil crime lord and a missing family member and the ability to pick up just about anything lying around and use it to cave somebody else's skull in - it's just that Sega seemed to have forgotten to add any of the charm and finesse that made games like Double Dragon and Final Fight so popular.
That's partly down to the huge, open combat areas that come with moving a traditionally 2D game into a three-dimensional setting. Trawling around searching for a fight in 3D simply isn't as much fun as all those old-school, sprite-based brawlers. Then there's the limited range of moves for each of the 12 characters (most of which have to be unlocked by completing the single player story mode) and the general sense that once you've ploughed through everything Battle Street has to offer once (about a day's play at most) you're left with a game who's long-term playability stakes look bleaker than a 16 year incarceration in Siberia's least friendly prison complex.
But the real let down in Battle Street is its multiplayer game and for a scrolling beat 'em up that's unforgivable. Huge, open-plan levels that allow players to run off in all directions, rather than being forced to stick together as a team, might sound like a great idea, but it meant Sega had to go for a split-screen approach instead of the more traditional, everybody on screen at once game - and the end result is tiny characters, confusing combat and not much fun for anyone concerned. Which is wrong Sega, very wrong.
Of course, you could always argue that Spikeout: Battle Street gets round this by being an online fighting game as well, where everybody gets their own screen to themselves, but we can't see this idea washing either. Scrolling beat 'em ups are meant to be played shoulder to shoulder - four like-minded individuals, arguing about who gets the next extra life or letting slip the odd stray fist into each other's kidneys - but, well, we can't really imagine this totally unique gaming experience working in an online format, especially when everybody playing could be literally thousands of miles apart. System link, maybe, but only if you pushed all the telly's really close together first.
Don't get us wrong. We're not setting out to discredit the scrolling beat 'em up here. As far as we're concerned Sega's Streets of Rage 2 is still one of the finest games ever made (and if they could ever make a sequel that looked and played as impressively as Ninja Gaiden or Dead or Alive Ultimate, say, we'd be totally sold) but Spikeout Battle Street is not the next generation scrolling beat 'em up we so desperately wanted it to be. By all means rent it for an evening of fun, just don't buy it and then expect it to last you more than a day.
SPLASHDOWN
A truly entertaining jet ski racer with lots of great courses
Racing - Issue 7 (September 2002) - 8.1/10
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Splashdown.txtRead Review
When it comes to water, no console can make the wet stuff look more convincing than Xbox. It crops up all over the place, looking enticingly splashy in games as varied as Dead or Alive 3 (Issue 01, 8.5), Halo (Issue 01, 9.7), and Enclave (Issue 06, 5.8).
It's one thing making it look nice, though, and another making it convincing to play in. Anyone who's spent a bit of time with Blood Wake (Issue 02, 4.5) will know that making a boat handle convincingly on water isn't the easiest thing to get right.
Arguably, only Wave Race 64 on the Nintendo 64 has ever created an accurate feeling of racing through water. But now, Splashdown has bobbed into view, offering the chance to cane a Sea-Doo in a variety of aquatic locations. The game came out on PlayStation 2 late last year, but brings improvements and two new courses for its Xbox bow.
At the core of Splashdown is a 20-race championship, taking in gorgeous scenery in places as far flung as Bali, the Great Barrier Reef and Miami. It looks smashing throughout. Not that any one area is spectacularly outstanding, though; instead, they all fit consistently well to make a deliciously solid-looking environment. It's all very colourful, and the water is well lit to avoid it looking overly oily and slick, as is often the case with game water. Everything looks vibrant, solid and chunky, giving Splashdown a healthy dose of immediate charm.
There's variety in the visuals, too. City-based races are interspersed with tropical areas, a race in a volcano crater provides a diverting change from tearing round a swamp, and the man-made arena courses are a hoot.
And as well as looking spiffing, parting the waves feels good too. It's not quite up to Wave Race 64, in truth, as the water doesn't feel quite as solid as it does in that game when it smacks into the hull of your Sea-Doo. But it's not far off, and racing through the water is still involving, especially when the subtleties of Sea-Doo handling become familiar.
Smoothly hydroplaning through shallow curves before dipping the nose of your craft and turning tightly around a buoy is top fun, and races can be very tight. With plenty of courses to play through, and all the sights being so pleasant, sitting down and racing through the game's Career mode is enjoyable. The effort is made all the more worthwhile because the two new Xbox-only courses are among the best on offer, with the console's extra horsepower being utilised to make choppier water. Negotiating rougher waves is a laugh, requiring plenty of skill to speed through with a respectable time.
That's not to say Splashdown is perfect, mind. Every now and then, opponents seem suspiciously overskilled, overtaking you if you make just one error. At other times, solid racing can stretch a field of CPU foes too thinly, making races a little solitary. As your skills improve, though, Normal mode rapidly becomes a breeze, so that the 20 enjoyable races are soon over.
In order to try and prolong the experience, the developer has put in a qualifying round before each race. This involves racing around the circuit on your own, setting a time which will hopefully be good enough to get one of the five spots on the starting line.
But it's something of a pointless exercise. Splashdown isn't a technical racer like Moto GP: Ultimate Racing Technology (Issue 04, 8.9); it's about racing on a fun course. And it's not as if qualifying makes any difference to the race outcome. Whether you start in first or fifth place, you can be in front by the first corner.
Making the opposition stiffer would have benefited the game more. As it is, the Hard mode makes for a tougher race, but you still need to qualify. But as far as big problems go, that's just about it.
The frame rate becomes a little stuttery on very busy corners, but never enough to spoil things, and the water could have done with being a bit choppier from time to time. But neither of these niggles is enough to dull the fun.
Splashdown should more than fulfil your needs for a darned good arcade racer. The lure of seeing the next course is strong and there are some treats in store for those who stick with it. Tightly negotiating the slalom turns on the Venice course, in particular, is very satisfying, as you can really feel the buoyancy of the water.
It may be a bit simple, and it won't occupy your Xbox for months on end, but Splashdown offers a great-looking and very enjoyable ride.
SPLAT MAGAZINE RENEGADE PAINTBALL
The safest possible way to shoot paint at other people
Shooter - Issue 58 (August 2006) - 5.4/10
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splatmag.txtRead Review
Paintball videogames are for the weak! Why else would you play a paintball videogame rather than do the real thing, other than to avoid getting a body covered with the nasty red boils you get when paintballs batter your skin? Scared of a little pain? Then this first-person paintball simulation is the game for you! You big wuss.
Renegade Paintball's career mode is basically an offline warm-up for Live games. You choose from several paintballing 'greats', including a 13-year-old, erm, 'professional', and various attractive women who apparently write for paintballing publication Splat Magazine and a few generic bots with names like 'Hairy Andy' or 'Newbie Candy'. It won't matter who you choose though - there's practically no difference between them, visual or otherwise. There are Elimination matches (shoot all of the opposing team), and capture the flag games (capture... their flag), on either Woodsball and Speedball arenas - the former predictably takes place outdoors with lots of trees and rocks to hide behind, the latter is set indoors, with plenty of inflatable cover. The smaller Speedball arenas are a lot faster, and because it's one-hit 'kills' in paintball you'll be doing plenty of, erm, respawning.
The problems with the single-player begin with some pretty hefty gameplay imbalances; the odds feel totally stacked in the CPU's favour and your AI buddies are comparatively useless. On anything other than the easiest difficulty, the AI opponents use their zen-like powers to nail you from the other side of the woods whenever you pop your head out from behind cover, while your CPU buddies run around doing as they please - except they never seem to be able to hit anything and they absolutely refuse to capture flags.
Another dent in Renegade Paintball's battered bonnet is the truly awful control setup - there's no auto-aim and the stick calibration is all over the place. It's a trial to get your cursor anywhere near your opponent in a heated shootout, let alone when your AI antagonists have more accuracy than Clint Eastwood with a sniper rifle, six cans of Red Bull and a box of Pro Plus.
At least when you're playing on Xbox Live everyone's in the same boat. Once you actually find a group to play with - in itself, no easy task - a session of random paint-spamming is usually what you end up with, thanks again to the dodgy controls. The Live experience itself is riddled with bugs, and being booted back to the lobby after every match - especially as games can often be very short - is incredibly annoying.
But there are some redeeming features. The built-in field editor is a nice addition, letting you take existing arenas and tweak them to your liking, by adding extra giant inflatable things, for example. You can even take your constructed arenas on to Live and share them with the world - when you start a game with your custom map, joining players will automatically download it.
Another of Renegade Paintball's few appealing features is (perhaps unsurprisingly) stolen from Greg Hastings' Tournament Paintball. Holding down the Left trigger and using the Left stick lets you lean around corners for sneaky pot-shots, then snap back behind cover as soon as you release the stick; this is a useful manoeuvre, especially in fast indoor games.
Splat Magazine Renegade Paintball is an okay bargain-bin FPS, but it just doesn't compete with proper 'grown-up' shooters. Although that's hardly a surprise - a simulation of a simulation is hardly the best recipe for success, especially when the first word in its title is 'splat'.
SPLINTER CELL: PANDORA TOMORROW
Enhances everything that was good about the original
Action adventure - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 9.3/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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US02502W)
Splinter.txtRead Review
The original Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell (Issue 10, 9.0) was a gaming revelation. Purists may scoff and claim Solid Snake is the Sultan of Stealth, but they need only take a look at the numerous accolades and mountains of praise heaped upon Sam Fisher's first covert insertion. After extrapolating all the best bits of every stealth game ever made, we were left with an outstandingly atmospheric and extremely playable third-person actioner. It seems that whatever Tom Clancy puts his name to turns to gold, and although his moniker is distinctly absent from this sequel, previous glimpses through our night vision goggles and hushed whispers captured over laser microphones hinted that complete with a rumoured online multiplayer mode, Pandora Tomorrow could be something very special.
Gameplay is, unsurprisingly, very similar to the first Splinter Cell game. Players undertake missions involving specific objectives provided by your CIA backup (and Fisher's mentor), Lambert. A terrorist cell, headed by Suhadi Sadona, has stolen a smallpox virus, and is threatening to release it in the US unless daily ransom demands are met. Fisher travels all over the world trying to uncover the plot, paving the way for a fantastic variety of mission objectives including hostage rescue, trailing suspects, defusing bombs and assassinations. Because of the covert nature of the operation, lethal force is occasionally not permitted, and here is where Fisher must use his Pandora's box of gadgets to silently knock out enemies. Each level, from the gorgeous-looking Indonesian jungle (the first real outdoor outing for Fisher) to the exhilarating train pursuit is significantly longer in this sequel, though this only provides greater scope for more absorbing puzzles. Although there's greater character interaction in PT, and more varied conversations, Fisher is a lot more hard-bitten this time round, and the whole tone of the game is a lot darker - it's often necessary for Sam to kill innocent people just to ensure his own survival.
SC was renowned for its groundbreaking graphics, but by that measure, SC:PT boasts a positive earthquake of graphical goodness. The cutscenes are drastically improved, with the opening intro (set in East Timor, where we get introduced to Suhadi Sadono) displaying amazingly lifelike characters and water effects.
After a stylish depiction of the terrorists' raid on the US Embassy, it's straight into the first mission; namely, entering the Embassy to rescue a captured CIA programmer. There's no tutorial as such; players are gradually introduced to the Third Echelon way of thinking through handy pop-up hints courtesy of Lambert. This is a great way of easing the player into the action, and a more inventive way than the CIA training camp at the start of SC. The whole thing is surprisingly easy and remains the core of the gameplay for the duration of the game: don't be heard and don't be seen.
The developer makes a point of showing off its real-time lighting effects at every opportunity, and rightly so. Never before in a game has the environment had such an influence on both the graphics and the gameplay. Every slat of wood, every partially drawn blind or curtain, every nook and cranny will all cast amazingly lifelike shadows, which our spy must use to his advantage when negotiating each level. SC:PT still retains the gritty feel of the first game, but complements this with some vibrant outdoor environments. Fantastic bump-mapping too means Sam Fisher is even more detailed, with every little ripple of muscle on display. Ooer!
If you thought the first SC was impressive, wind your neck back in because PT blows all your preconceptions about character animation out of the water. Fisher's silky smooth movement is unbelievable, be it running, climbing or jumping, and it genuinely feels like you've got a real person's life in your hands as soon as you get inserted. We loved the way Fisher scales a drainpipe, then seamlessly shifts his bodyweight over to an adjourning ledge, all in one continuous, fluid movement. Brilliant!
To complement his new look, Sam now has even more moves up his sleeves. The innovative camera, a strong feature of the first title, is back, and it's thanks to this that such a wide range of moves are possible. Crouched in a doorway, but need to see what's round the corner? No problem, thanks to the fully rotational camera that will automatically zoom in and out to avoid getting stuck, making cautiously exploring the environments a pleasurable, and not painstaking, experience.
Staying hidden is still crucial, and to aid this Sam has a whole host of new gadgets and features at his disposal. A quick click on the Right thumbstick activates your built-in binoculars (complete with adjustable zoom, night and thermal vision), which saves the previously frustrating action of drawing your rifle, zooming in, then putting it away again just to see what's up ahead. Hiding the limp and lifeless bodies of fallen enemies was always an entertaining and vital part of the first game, but annoying was not the word if you got near the end of a level, only for one of their comrades to find an ill-concealed corpse way back and raise the alarm - thus forcing you to try the whole level again. Now, the newly designed stealth meter clearly shows your varying degrees of visibility, and flashes when you are completely concealed - so now you know exactly where it's safe to effectively hide a body. Sam's puckered up this time round, and has a great new feature enabling him to wolf whistle at enemies to get their attention - highly effective for drawing them into the shadows where he's lurking to dispatch them.
Your gun too, has been modified, offering a range of zoom options and a customised barrel optimised for silent kills, and the great new interface system means selecting and applying gadgets both looks and feels a lot more intuitive.
The game forces players to use a lot of these gadgets quite early on. You get the rifle, complete with Sticky Shockers and Diversion Cameras on only the second level, and right from the off it's vital to use Sam's night and thermal vision to progress. This does speed up the whole learning process in general, but there is an assumption that gamers have already played the first Splinter Cell - when you stumble across Wall Mines, for example, there's no explanation for how to safely defuse them.
Whilst we're all for challenging gameplay, the first SC was notorious for some annoyingly difficult sections, and we've got mixed feelings when we say PT repeats this right from the start. It's no fun when games are a complete walkover, but some gamers may find the difficulty has been cranked up a fraction too high. On most levels, a display shows the number of alarm stages you're allowed to trigger, either by noisily disposing an enemy or being spotted. This is fine where lethal attacks are permitted, as if you remain quiet for long enough the alarm stages will eventually decrease, and it's easy to take enemies out from a distance. When lethal force is not authorised however, foes must be dispatched with either Sticky Shockers or the low-impact Airfoil rounds, or by a swift crack to the head. Whilst this means Sam must stay hidden right up until a bad guy is almost on top of him, more often than not they'll emit a yelp when hit, raising the alarm stage. The difficulty of killing enemies is compounded with each increasing alarm stage, as they go from wearing normal clothes (body shots count), to wearing flak jackets (headshots only) to wearing helmets (face shots only).
Opinion is divided on whether SC:PT can be called a non-linear game, as although it isn't strictly open-ended (you ultimately have to reach the same goal at the end of each level), due to the amount of different gadgets at your disposal and the slightly different routes through each scenario, there are many, many different ways of working through the game. The upside of this is that there's always a great variety of things to do throughout the levels, you're given a huge amount of freedom, and replayability is immeasurably increased. The downside, however, is that it's quite easy to bypass a cache of ammo and health, leaving you stuck at the next checkpoint with low energy, an empty clip and several angry guards - forcing you to backtrack to the previous save point and replay a significant chunk of the level. There is a fair degree of trial and error gameplay, too, and although the enemy AI is intelligent in an immediate sense, they behave in exactly the same way each time you repeat a stage.
SC was a great standalone, single-player title, and although they say in the kingdom of the blind the one-eyed man is king, in the kingdom of the Live the one-spied man won't last two seconds. The inclusion of Xbox Live-enabled, four-way multiplayer madness takes stealthing to the next level, as gamers choose to play as Shadownet Operatives or defending Mercenaries in a whole host of maps and scenarios. Having the Spies controlled via third-person and the Mercs as first-person is a fantastic way of balancing out the gameplay, and perfectly complements the guards' superior weaponry against the spies' more refined movements. Multiplayer mode encourages the spies to step up the pace a bit, and the emphasis is less on sneaking and more on frantic dashing into areas to defuse the ND133s. Far from ruining the stealthy experience, this genuinely enhances the gameplay, and allows you to charge through the levels in the complete opposite way to the softly softly approach necessitated by the main game.
By enhancing everything that was good about the original Splinter Cell, the developer has surpassed itself both graphically and in gameplay with the sequel. The single-player game is a thing of beauty to both behold and play, and although occasionally frustrating, is immensely satisfying. The multiplayer mode, however, raises the online bar and paves the way for a new breed of game - and believe us, things don't get any tenser than this. It's an absolute gem, as Fisher again sneaks out of the shadows to silence any possible opposition with extreme prejudice.
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS: BATTLE FOR BIKINI BOTTOM
Faithful to the cartoon series and completely insane, but not inventive enough or as mad as it should be
Platformer - Issue 33 (September 2004) - 7.0/10
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Spongebob.txtRead Review
Mmm... okay. So then... SpongeBob. A sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea and, for reasons unexplained, has an arse like a trapezium. We're pretty stumped. If this is kids' television then bring back the Playbus. Harder perhaps than comprehending the adventures of an aquatic, cellulose polymer brick, is the task of basing a game around him. Those poor developers.
Well, base a game around him they did, and, not surprisingly, they've kept things pretty tame. Battle For Bikini Bottom (snigger, titter) is a fine old platformer, nothing more, nothing less, just a little briny between the ears. You'll be collecting sparkly shells, boshing bad guys, flicking switches like every other platform before it, and collecting gems/tokens/coins in order to unlock other sections of the game. Chances are you've played SpongeBob already, you just don't know it yet.
Thankfully, there has been great attention smeared over SpongeBob, ensuring that all his friends, enemies, and cartoon environments have been included. Even Gary the meowing snail makes an appearance (eh?!), which is sure to please the fans of SpongeBob, but something that leaves us old cronies completely befuddled. You're also able to play as Patrick the starfish and Sandy Cheeks the scuba-diving cat throughout the course of the game, and although these guys often have different abilities to 'Bob, the tasks you're asked to complete with them don't alter course too much. You'll still be hitting switches, leaping from platforms, and clouting tracksuit-wearing trout.
There are a few sub-games to SpongeBob, such as bungee jumping using the elastic in your square pants, bubble riding, and the Crash Bandicoot-inspired tongue-surfing sections (lay on your own tongue and slide down a slope smashing boxes for goodies). Plus, there's plenty, and boy do we mean plenty, of oddball humour, and although this gives a fairly standard platformer a little left-of-centre zest, it hasn't gone far enough. It's strange how, for a cartoon that has attracted cult status and is probably responsible for liquidizing the brains of an entire generation, when it comes to indulging in the madness, it's all a little too tame. We wanted to come away from Battle for Bikini Bottom declaring the genius of the feral pigeon and defecating in our shoes before a coloured pill and a kiss goodnight from Nurse, not feeling slightly smug that we've collected all 100 golden coins. Still, if you've got a crazy kid that needs reining in after one too many sessions of SpongeBob on a Saturday morning, this could be the perfect antidote. The ten levels should keep them quiet for some time, and it's got all the great SpongeBob flavour with none of the nasty side effects!
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS: LIGHTS, CAMERA, PANTS!
Mental, brain-hurting party game starring the boy-sponge and his undersea friends. A bit too kerayzee-mental for its own good
Party - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 5.6/10
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Squarepants.txtRead Review
Flip burgers, catch burgers, go faster, flip burgers, catch burgers, go faster, flip burgers catch burgers, go faster... Take orders, make orders, serve orders, repeat! SpongeBob leads a crazy, crazy life, but we're not sure if taking part in it is all that good for your health.
Sold as a 'party' game, Lights, Camera, PANTS! is as baffling and unfathomable a title as you're likely to find. Every 'game', of which there seems to be hundreds of the psychedelic bleeders, is an assault on the senses. If it's not working in the fast food store, it's lifting weights against muscle-bound sharks, cliff climbing while a conveyor belt above spews rubbish down on you, or taking part in a John Travolta-style dance-off against robots.
Things are so fast and frenzied it'll no doubt make the perfect party game to any 14-year-old with access to his parent's booze cabinet and the pin number to unlock Men and Motors on Sky. This is not a party game for anyone who likes things ordered and with definable goals. It's all about bashing buttons randomly and looking around to see whether your rivals have cottoned on, or are just as clueless as you are. It's probably the only party game we can think of where skill doesn't seem to matter, but being a frantic, spotty hyperactive boy is probably an advantage.
It features all the characters from the TV show, but that doesn't matter because you'll be so knee-deep in button sequences and flying hamburgers you won't even notice. Odd is not the word. Grab a packet of aspirin and judge for yourself.
SPY HUNTER
Instantly enjoyable, totally superficial shoot 'em up chase action
Action - Issue 4 (June 2002) - 6.7/10
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SpyHunter.txtRead Review
When people stay faithful, it's nice. All too often, some age-old arcade franchise gets exhumed and stretched across a 3D engine whether it needs it or not. It's the gaming equivalent of a QVC presenter - a previously popular but now D-list performer resurrected in a ham-fisted attempt to add a touch of class. How refreshing, then, to see that Spy Hunter barely strays from the spirit of the 1983 original, a classic arcade blaster.
So the Peter Gunn Theme is still there, and the gameplay is still a frantic piece of high-speed chase action over tarmac and water as you attempt to thwart the world-crushing plans of the maniacal Nostra cult. You know the type - vague world domination theory, white cat, big world map with flashing lights...
Again, you've got your transforming superspy vehicle, all turbo boost, guns recessed behind gleaming bodywork, beverage holder fitted as standard. It's the centre-piece of the game and it handles well, striking a nice balance between simplicity and depth. For all its boys' toys, though, it can't reverse, which is a good indication of the fire-and-forget nature of the missions in Spy Hunter.
Each mission has several objectives, but the primary goals always involve driving really fast or blowing stuff up. There are common tasks to each mission - minimise civilian casualties, collect glowy orbs (Satcoms) - and you have to revisit some levels to open up later missions.
So, if everything is in place for an explosive, shallow arcade shooter, what's wrong? Two things, and do pay attention, James...
First, the action itself feels flimsy and random. Getting attacked from all sides is a pain, and returning fire is an awkward hassle. Sometimes it's better to speed on through, finger clamped on the machine-gun trigger, since your energy bar seems to take a meatier battering when you try to put up a considered fight.
Second, to put it bluntly, it looks like a Nintendo 64 game, a washed-out world made in grey. In fact it's actually nothing more than a direct PS2 port. Considering what Xbox is capable of, Spy Hunter offers it no challenge whatsoever. This could, and should, have been a lot better.
SPY HUNTER 2
A no-frills blaster on wheels. Ace sense of speed, amazingly detailed explosions, but no substance
Action - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 5.9/10
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Spyhunter2.txtRead Review
Being a spy, or 'spy hunter' for that matter, does not mean chasing people through the streets of New Orleans in a Transformer. Just because Bond does it, doesn't make it big or clever. Being a spy hunter, especially in the 21st century, means more than racing along a stretch of road avoiding mines and shooting the bejesus out of everything.
It may have washed way back in the '80s arcades, but not in this fast-paced world of nano-technology and subversive counter-intelligence. For God's sake, Roger Moore used to be 007, haven't we learned anything?
The story, which is helpfully explained via an onboard computer called Leonie 2.0, is the usual Eastern Bloc nonsense, but that's utterly forgivable. The game is arcade through and through, so you don't need to be bamboozled with spytalk and convoluted plots. But that doesn't mean you're licensed to neglect the agonisingly thin gameplay. It needed beefing up, especially since this is a sequel, but what you're essentially left with is a checkpoint chaser. Racing (always against the clock) from the beginning of a track to its often miserable end does not a good game make. We suspect this was obvious even during development so, to divert your attention away from the path-following monotony, someone pulled out the 'let's make it so difficult people forget how linear it is' card. It is exceptionally difficult, and this isn't counter-balanced by any semblance of reward. Dazzling pyrotechnics, glorious FMV sequences and triumphant fanfares are sadly lacking, especially as these would be the only things worth suffering SpyHunter 2 for.
Granted, there's an amazing sense of speed to your super-duper spy car, and when you're whipping it along a frosted mountain pass with explosions all around, you could be forgiven for thinking you're in a different game. Unfortunately, although your car is exceptionally fast, it appears to be made of pie tins. The slightest breeze or insect hitting the windshield and it explodes or transforms into a lesser vehicle. The car turns into a bike, the boat into a hydrofoil. The first time the small transformation sequence kicks in it's actually rather impressive, but you'll soon find out that you might just as well have transformed into sausage for all the good it does you. The primary vehicles have dodgy targeting systems at best, but the smaller craft are belly up before they've begun. And then what? Well, even if you're at the very outset of a mission, or nearing its climax, it's straight back to the start to do it all over again.
In its meagre defence (it's guilty, we know that, but let's hear it out), it's certainly not the ugliest set of wheels in the lot. Explosions pirouette and shoot off into the sky satisfyingly, missiles snake their way through water before kicking up a huge spray, and the graphics engine is fairly competent. The handling is just the right of side of average, and for the most fleeting of bubblegum moments it's not bad. The rest of the time though, it's the Inspector Clouseau of spies; a real, bumbling Maureen from Driving School excuse of a game.
Games have changed since we all shoved ten pence pieces into slots way back when, yet arcade updates on the whole never seem capable of letting go of the apron strings. Imagine, just for a second, that SpyHunter 2 had been done like Grand Theft Auto III (Issue 25, 8.9) instead. Good, eh? We shall say no more on the subject.
SPY VS SPY
Don't remember the original? Don't worry, this is nothing like it. Platforming fun; a right giggle in multiplayer
Screenshots - Action/puzzler - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 6.8/10
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SpyVsSpy.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




Any self-respecting gamer over 25 will have fond memories of the classic Spy vs Spy titles. Pioneering the way multiplayer games were played, their legacy lasted over ten years, until the public grew tired of 2D puzzlers. Now Take-Two has decided to breathe new life into the bullet-riddled lungs of the sleuthing series.
We use the word 'sleuthing', but the real espionage flavour of the originals has been lost in the translation from 2D puzzler to 3D platformer/actioner. That's not to say the grey matter doesn't get put to use, because every mission/environment in the single-player Story mode involves players being intuitively lead through a series of simple (very tame) scenarios. Occasionally the environment allows you to set a trap for your nemesis, though this is merely a case of walking into a specific area, with the resulting comedy caper played out in a disappointingly pre-rendered cutscene.
What's much more satisfying is the option to play the Classic or Modern version of the game. Classic involves negotiating the familiar apartment setting, trying to acquire five hidden items before your foe. Stealth is much more paramount here, and the emphasis is on placing snidey traps to scupper your opponent. Context-sensitive controls allow your Spy to sneak around (though not quite up to Sam Fisher's standards), but this placid padding does prevent your character leaving footprints. The Modern mode plays much the same, only over the same maps from the single-player campaign.
This new direction allows for a revamped and rollicking multiplayer mode. Up to four players can try to command an arena in one of the many game modes like Last Spy Standing and Deathmatch variants. The maps aren't huge, but due to the random nature of available weapons, are a real laugh. Spy vs Spy is quite a detraction from its roots, but a refreshing update nonetheless.
SPYRO: A HERO'S TAIL
Accessible, addictive and boasts huge environments. Numerous replayable mini-games for endless hours of play
Platformer - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 7.0/10
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Spyro.txtRead Review
Here be dragons. Not nasty fire-breathing ones that'll munch several fair maidens for breakfast mind you, but cute, fluffy purple ones that, aside from having a mean line in comic asides and a badass 'tude, are pretty adept at saving the world. Vivendi's long-running Spyro franchise debuts on Xbox, boasting bigger levels, bigger baddies and a whole host of new friends for our loveable lizard to play with.
The typically convoluted storyline details how the Red Dragon (an evil Elder Dragon, not a disfigured, family-slaughtering serial killer) has scattered Dark Gems throughout the realm.
The result? The entire realm has turned evil - mwaaa-ha-ha! It's up to Spyro to explore the large, expansive environments, smashing the Dark Gems along the way, and restoring good to the land. In a neat touch, every time one of the evil stones is smashed, the environment dynamically changes before players' eyes. So it was worth that ten-minute jumping marathon to reach the top of that nearby mountain then...
Collecting gems is the staple of any generic platformer, and Spyro has the chance to amass more bling than J-Lo. Use these in exchange for items at the wily Moneybag's shop, and you can purchase all manner of different items such as Lockpicks, Teleport tokens and various attack upgrades to aid your overall quest to bring light back into the world.
Salubrious shopkeepers aren't the only creatures you'll meet along your travels, however. Spyro: A Hero's Tail features tons of different colourful characters to interact with. In a brilliant touch, players can assume control of several of these, each with radically different abilities to Spyro. New guy Blink the Mole and the brilliantly funny, stiff upper-lipped Sgt Byrd line up with old pals like Hunter the Cheetah. Use your funky friends over specific levels and mini-games to earn more bartering items (Dragon Eggs and Light Gems). These sub-levels are just as much fun, in some cases better than the main game itself and provide a great variation in both pace and gameplay. We loved the spectacular flying levels in particular, where a jetpacking Sgt Byrd takes to the skies and players have to complete certain challenges, like shooting down a flock of vultures in a given time limit.
As for Spyro himself, the game sticks firmly to the tried and tested format of the previous titles. Explore the environment (in his prancing, cutesy camp way) and once each realm is clear, engage in a not particularly challenging boss battle. Only this time round, the benevolent beastie has loads of new powers available, as each level necessitates. All-new Electric Breath destroys robots, whilst Ice Breath (he obviously had his Wrigley's Extra this morning) is great for cooling things down when the heat gets too much. Although character and level detail are fairly bland, the animation is decent enough, though Spyro has a nasty habit of skidding around like his claws were made of Teflon - this can be very annoying when precision jumping is frequently called for.
A Hero's Tail is actually fairly hefty, with enormous levels to explore. Obviously a younger gamer's title, plenty of colourful visuals and the addition of so many replayable mini-games should keep the kiddies enthralled (and quiet) for hours at a time. Which is surely the sign of a decent kids' game, right?
SRS: STREET RACING SYNDICATE
Deep and detailed, though the lacklustre races will have you nodding off at the wheel. Handling is sluggish and AI is confusing
Screenshots - Racing - Issue 43 (June 2005) - 6.0/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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SRS.txtRead Review
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Haven't we had enough of these by now? Generic street racers featuring tattooed, clichéd stereotypes who drive around in crews and strive to earn respect just as much as they do cash, spouting laughable 'yo' street talk. Yawn. SRS wants to be in the cool street racers' gang, but no amount of shiny new paint or the latest tyres will get this kid accepted - it's just too much of a wannabe.
The game revs off the grid promisingly enough; you're subbed in at the last minute to drive for a notorious crew, and players will easily blast through the race in a souped-up beast. It's a massive shame then, that this was merely a taste of the game's potential. You're given the chance to race for yourself, but relegated back to the standard Golfs and Imprezas so familiar to games of this type. We appreciate the story element requires this, but it's a frustratingly massive step back to trundle round a circuit in a seemingly sloth-like entry-level motor.
Speaking of which, races themselves are about as electrifying as an unearthed Van de Graf generator. Vehicle handling is very sluggish, and there's not the slightest sensation of speed. 120mph, the speedometer reliably informs us? We could crawl blindfolded through quicksand faster than this. AI drivers are annoyingly inconsistent as well. You'll easily overtake the field in a matter of seconds, and should theoretically build up a noticeable lead. However, scrape a corner or clip and oncoming car, and the AI cars will magically appear right on your tail, regardless of how fast you've been storming through the last couple of laps. There's no real damage modelling either, but repairs must be made to your car if you're careless for a few races.
There's a respectable number of races on offer, found by cruising the streets and looking out for each denoting icon. Dive into the obligatory custom shop and you'll be presented with a baffling array of upgrades for your car. The huge amounts of cosmetics are easy enough to grasp, but if you don't know your cars then you'll struggle to contemplate the mind-boggling performance enhancements. Great for enthusiasts, but daunting for the rest of us. We're accustomed to handy auto-upgrade options in games of this nature, and the lack of one here is annoyingly apparent.
Multiplayer is obviously catered for, and SRS boasts two-player split-screen, and both System Link and Xbox Live for up to four players. However, the game still suffers from the same frustrations as the single-player mode, and unfortunately races feel stagnant and uninspiring. SRS features an impressive amount of depth, but the lacklustre gameplay may put the handbrake on you ever really appreciating it.
SSX 3
Loads of stuff to unlock but it's just a glossy remake of its predecessor
Extreme sports - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 7.9/10
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SSX3.txtRead Review
Whether you've actually done it or not, everybody knows snowboarding is immense fun, and has a somewhat extreme image associated with it. The previous two SSX games concentrated on this aspect rather than being realistic simulations, and now the third title comes blazing down an icy black run of fun onto Xbox.
An all-new feature is the Conquer the Mountain mode. Three huge environments (peaks) are available, but have to be unlocked in numerical order. Each peak is divided into Race, Freestyle and Freeride disciplines, which are split into a further four different routes to, once again, complete in numerical order to unlock the next.
Far from lycra-clad funboys slaloming through poles, the Race sections involve breath-taking rides down sheer faces incorporating jumps, gaps and rails. Freestyle is pretty much the same sort of deal, only you're up against the clock to amass astronomical amounts of points through amazing combos. Yep, that's right, the crazy cats with the even crazier moves are back with a vengeance and, as we said before, the emphasis here is clearly on over-the-top, totally unrealistic tricks.
Pull off several good combos in a row, and your Special meter will fill up. Once this reservoir of radness is complete, hold the boost button for a quick burst of speed - vital for a sprint finish or to get bigger air off the enormous jumps. Perform several consecutive special moves and you'll fill up the Uber-meter, which allows you to pull off mad moves for big points.
Freeride is exactly that; explore each environment and complete tasks to unlock more costumes and earn cash. Pop into the mountain lodge to upgrade your stats and buy clobber - it's all standard fare for extreme sports titles.
So how does it differ from its predecessors? Well, it doesn't. The races are searingly fast, and whilst the exploration aspect does add a bit to the gameplay, you're far too limited as to where you can and can't go on the mountain. There's a decent amount of stuff to unlock, including special tricks individual to each character, but it still feels like we're just retreading the same old territory. There are only so many tricks you can pull before it feels repetitive, and although there are only three environments, the difficulty curve on the races is considerably steep.
If you don't own any of the previous SSX titles, this is definitely worth checking out but, at the end of the day, it's just a glossy remake of its predecessor.
SSX TRICKY
Fast and furious, but it needed souping up to become great
Extreme sports - Issue 5 (July 2002) - 7.5/10
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EA00403E)
SSXTricky.txtRead Review
Snow may be rarer than rocking horse poo down round these parts, but games featuring rad dudes grabbing phat air down the icy slopes certainly aren't. Following the success of Amped (Issue 01, 8.7), you can now sample the manic trick-based racing thrills of SSX Tricky - deservedly a huge hit last Christmas on PlayStation 2.
The game won legions of admirers for its addictive, all-action gameplay and superb visuals, and now that the Xbox version has finally reared its head in the UK we were keen to see just what's been done to the game in the way of upgrades. Sadly, after playing spot-the-difference for several hours, we found it almost impossible to tell the two versions apart.
Okay, the texturing and bump-mapping look a wee bit better on Xbox, and there's a slightly different control configuration, but there's nothing to make this version stand out from the original. It's a pity to have to report that stingy old EA has failed to provide any new tracks, characters, costumes or boards.
But if the prospect of playing a carbon copy of a decent PS2 snowboard racer doesn't bother you, then there's plenty to admire. SSX Tricky gets the balance right in that it's easy to pick up but hard to master, in the tradition of all the best action games. And while no match for Amped in terms of graphics, it has a purist, arcade appeal that gives it the edge in terms of pure gameplay.
Whether you choose to play the speed-based World Circuit, the more trick-oriented Show Off mode or the chilled-out Free Ride, your early trips down the slopes will inevitably be tainted with frustration. More often than not you'll be eating snow as you crash and burn in the pursuit of the many cool combos.
Stepping back into the excellent training mode for a while is a must. It has the dual purpose of demonstrating moves that increase your character's ability and introducing the super high scoring Uber-tricks.
With some top tricks in your armoury, the game suddenly falls into place; you begin to win medals, unlock better boards and, in turn, improve your character's stats - essential for progress through the tough later tracks. It's this carrot-on-a-stick system within the game that has you returning for more.
Familiarity breeds contentment, and not only do the moves get easier and more satisfying as you get deeper into the game, but each of the ten huge tracks also has hidden paths and shortcuts, some of which you have to find once the pace hots up.
As for multiplayer fun, the obligatory two-player mode is present, and is just as much fun as it was on PS2, but you have to question why EA hasn't chucked in a four-player mode as an Xbox bonus. Given the power of the machine, it seems a basic oversight, and would have given gamers a little more bang for their buck.
As it stands, SSX Tricky is a solid game, but one which hasn't taken advantage of the mighty hardware at its disposal.
SSX ON TOUR
Snow-bound trick-busting, now on two bits of wood rather than one! Whatever will they think of next?
US Sports - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 7.4/10
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EA13001E)
SSXOnTour.txtRead Review
It's been two whole years since EA's last snowboarding extravaganza SSX3 (Issue 23, 7.9), and what has the software giant come up with since? Jet-powered snowboards? No. A time-travelling storyline where rival snowboarding gangs battle via TXT MSG for 'respect'? No thanks! We'll tell you what it came up with: skis.
Correct us if we're wrong, but isn't the whole point of the SSX series based on how much cooler snowboards are? Throwing in the option to glide down a snowy mountain on two bits of fibreglass instead of one smells a bit like EA trying to squeeze the last dregs from a series that reached its 'peak' quite some time ago. SSX's evolution from straight snowboard racer to monster alpine trick-buster was pretty much complete with the last game. All On Tour manages to do is simply rehash the same old formula, throw in a few new tricks (hence the skis) and hope we won't notice.
Some things have changed, thankfully. The front end in particular, which groans under a heavy sheen of MTV 2-licensed imagery and hand-drawn menus done by a cartoonist who's been sniffing his felt tips a bit too long. It's certainly eye-catching, if a little headache-inducing, and together with the equally MTV 2 soundtrack gives SSX On Tour a really cool and unique sense of style.
The format of the game, however, feels bizarrely underdeveloped for an EA effort. Like SSX3, there's one huge mountain split into several peaks, each with numerous trails to board and ski down. But instead of completing challenges that allow you to start further up the mountain, thereby slowly expanding the play area, On Tour simply offers random 'Shred' challenges - complete them and you can enter races and trick-offs versus the usual SSX masters. It's messy and unstructured and won't encourage you to keep playing.
It's a pity, as some of the design work in SSX On Tour is superb, with interesting courses full of endless short-cuts and secrets. The trick system is virtually identical to SSX3, but it's satisfyingly easy to pull off all kinds of OTT shape-chucking. Suspiciously familiar, but still a genuine alternative to the rather prim Amped 2 (Issue 23, 8.9). Dude.
STAKE FORTUNE FIGHTERS
Not a bad idea but a mess of a game with few redeeming features
Beat 'em up - Issue 19 (August 2003) - 2.5/10
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MD00401W)
Stake.txtRead Review
The premise behind Stake Fortune Fighters sounds promising - a good old beat 'em up tournament in the vein of Super Smash Bros. Melee and Power Stone. Unfortunately, the reality is more like death by a thousand paper cuts, as Stake proves through its poor gameplay and dodgy graphics that imitation isn't always flattering.
The eight characters are about as generic as you can get, with a mishmash of ideas pillaged from the Tekken and Virtua Fighter series. You've got your basic warrior type, as well as the obligatory lethal OAP and chick with big boobs. There's a little bit of explanation in the manual as to what these characters are doing at the tournament in the first place, but as far as the game goes, it doesn't make a lot of difference.
Once you've chosen a character it's straight into the action. This takes place over eight maps, with a varying number of opponents for each one. There are a few attack moves per character and some very basic combos, varying from handy range attacks to hard-to-target techniques that just resemble giving your opponent a big push. The back of the box seems to imply some kind of interactivity with the environment, but what that actually means is you can pick up and throw a few specific objects, rather than just uprooting trees and random boulders. There's a bit of fun to be had here, whether you're setting freeze traps, miniaturising opponents or simply lobbing bombs about. There's very little variation and physics to the throws though, and it's all too easy to get caught in your own blast radius.
The maps themselves could be a hell of a lot better - they're very poorly designed with some major clipping issues. Not only can you get stuck in them, but you can also slowly jump further inside the map until you fall out the other side. Things aren't helped by an unwieldy camera system and the fact that, despite a mini-map, you can't actually see all that much of the level at any one point.
There's very little difference between the single-player game and the multiplayer one, apart from the fact that your friends are probably a lot more interesting to play with than the crappy characters. Although this game is so poor you risk losing mates rather than entertaining them.
STAR TREK: SHATTERED UNIVERSE
Decent little shooter. If you can stomach the difficulty, it's rewarding and enjoyable
Shoot 'em up - Issue 30 (June 2004) - 7.0/10
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TM01602E)
StarTrek.txtRead Review
As well as providing ample illogical discussion material for Trekkies to debate over their pints of Romulan Ale at sci-fi conventions, the Star Trek licence has actually spawned a few fairly decent games on PC.
Not to be outdone, Shattered Universe on Xbox is actually a decent little shooter. Nicely mixing 1960s kitsch with more familiar Next Generation astrophysical anomalies, we follow the adventures of newly promoted Captain Sulu (voiced by original actor George Takei) aboard the USS Excelsior. As per Star Trek custom, the ship stumbles across a wormhole that transports them to a mirror universe where the Federation doesn't exist and the evil Imperial empire is in power. The newly morphed ISS Excelsior turns against the tyrannical ruler and must fight its way across the galaxy, ultimately to a path home.
Missions are the standard escort/protect/ destroy fare, and although story-driven cutscenes punctuate levels, each stage can quickly become monotonous. Every punishing level is harder than a bunch of convict Klingons, and both difficulty and frustration are compounded by the fact that additional objectives frequently pop up towards the end of a level. Annoying is not the word after sweating blood and tears blasting through a level for half an hour, only to have your decrepit ship fall apart on you after the third 'surprise' attack by an Imperial enemy ship. Each playable ship has various attributes and weaknesses, and although the first few would be better off with spud guns than the laughable lasers they boast, the later ships muster up much meatier weapons.
A 3D space shooter may be the obvious genre for a Star Trek licence, but when done with the capable style here, the result is more big bang than vacuum. Not quite as good-looking as the luscious Seven of Nine, the graphics are still nice and firm, although fine detail is often sacrificed for more impressive scenery and draw distance.
A major advantage of Shattered Universe is the fantastic use of the analogue sticks for your craft's handling. The Left thumbstick controls the general direction, while the Right determines the amount of pitch and yaw, and you'll not always be "going forward 'cos you can't find reverse" thanks to the triggers. It's immensely satisfying to combine these advanced controls during a hectic dogfight and turn on a sixpence to get that final kill shot in on an enemy, though it's just as easy to lazily thrust forward and back when fighting a behemoth enemy mothership.
Shattered Universe certainly doesn't reach Warp 9 by any expectations, but it does the licence no harm at all, and at 20 quid it's top value for your credits. Beam this up for a bit of fun, mindless blasting.
STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT
One of the most remarkable Star Wars games ever. A joy from start to finish, every time
Action shooter - Issue 35 (November 2004) - 9.0/10
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LA01705W)
StarBatt.txtRead Review
Long have we waited, long have we suffered the likes of Obi-Wan (Issue 03, 3.3) (yuk) and Jedi Outcast (Issue 10, 6.5) (mmm?). And for what? For this. For the Star Wars game you always hoped you'd have the chance to play, for a Star Wars game that rewards you abundantly for being a fan, and for a Star Wars game that lavishes you with every detail, droid and blaster from every moment of every film. This, even more so than KOTOR (Issue 20, 9.5) for those of us without a disposition for RPGs, is the ultimate Star Wars game. The ultimate.
From the icy wastes of Hoth watching lumbering AT-ATs quiver into view on your telescopic lens, to the log-swinging Ewok craftsmen trapping Scout Walkers between felled trunks like chop-sticks, everything is here, and you get a hand in it all.
The premise is simple. Epic battles (land, not space, but watch out for Battlefront 2 if our source at LucasArts is anything to go by) are re-enacted and you can replay them exactly how you'd choose if you were there. Up to 24 players can go at it on Live, blowing each other into smithereens, just as a lone player can go against 23 bots in Campaign mode. You have to obliterate one side and overthrow their command posts before they do it to you - easy.
There's very little to distinguish Live and single-player modes, such is the quality of bot AI, and although Battlefront is very much a multiplayer title, unlike other titles specifically tailored to be played in company, the single-player campaign will make you grin as wide as the galaxy itself. Environments are recreated to a perfection little seen in games. Sweeping vistas, music that dances off your goosebumps, cameos from Vader and chums, and a crazy collection of vehicles will have you returning time and time again. You even get to see glimpses of Episode III and the Wookiee planet Kashyyyk.
Such is the madness on screen, don't be surprised to be caught in the middle of huge pyrotechnic firefights which can threaten to overwhelm you with their ferocity. There literally is no lagging, slowdown, or loading of any kind; you're just plunged into it. To help you survive the brutal assaults you can play via either first- or third-person perspectives, and the control systems are fluid whether you're galloping over the dunes of Tattooine (watch for the Sarlaac's tentacles) or steaming towards a crippled AT-AT, a tauntaun under you, and a rocket launcher in hand for any survivors.
The choices you make very much dictate the outcome of battles, too. The AI is so perfect that if you were to sit back and watch, numbers on each side would deplete steadily until the battle's won. With a little interjection from you and depending on how good a strategist (and shot!) you are, the fight will sway either way. By giving the simplest of orders you can command men to hold their ground or follow you into the fray, thereby altering, almost imperceptibly, the tide of war. Don't worry though, the strategy is just another asset, not a necessity for success. That of course comes down to your trigger finger, and ability to fly through spitting hot laser fire in skies that are literally shredded by Imperial hate.
We can't quite get across just how playable Battlefront is, other than saying again that this is what you always hoped a Star Wars game would be. Apart from a constant need to switch perspectives and invert your axis when switching between ground skirmishes and vehicle battles, this is as perfect as you had hoped it would be. A tremendous, sweeping, beautiful game and further evidence, if it be needed, that Xbox Live is the way forward for gaming. Wow.
STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT II
It's one small step for Han, but one giant leap for Han's kind. Battlefront goes orbital...
MMOFPS - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 9.0/10
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LA02601W)
SWBII.txtRead Review
With Anakin now safely suited and booted inside his iron lung, LucasArts is opening the floodgates with Episode III content. We weren't allowed to see any Episode III stuff in the first Battlefront, save for a peek at Chewie's planet Kashyyyk.
So the most obvious conclusion to draw with Star Wars Battlefront II is that it's simply the first game with some of those CG Episode III planets stapled to it. Not so. The Star Wars universe is huge, so we're treated to a broad range of planets and locations from all six movies, not just from the last film. Leia's ship the Tantive IV, Dagobah, Jabba's Palace, and the Death Star all make their sequel debuts, and a great exercise in Rebel-zapping they prove to be too. But Battlefront II is far more than just plonking the entire bulk of the previous title into pretty new locations.
We cried out for the chance to take to the stars in the previous game - and now you can. Hulking great Star Destroyers and Rebel Transporters go at each other like two galleons in space, while players rush from hangar to hangar, strapping themselves into any number of smaller ships to launch David vs Goliath-style strikes at the enemy's weak spot. You can spiral into enemy bridges to take out their command (risky, and not particularly effective), or land in an enemy hangar, then sneak to the reactor core on foot to shut it down from inside. As you can probably gather, Battlefront II is a monster game, but it never feels lacking or poorly populated. Whole battalions of Stormtroopers, droids, Rebels and separatists swarm about with the kind of AI that sends a shiver up your spine. If you want to get close to a spawn point this time, you're either going to need some seriously chunky hardware, or be a superb sniper. It's relentless.
Because of the grander, busier gameplay, though, LucasArts has had to find a way to level the playing field. Enter the Jedi! Each Jedi or Sith has their own ability, be it Palpatine's lightning blasts, or Yoda's bounce attacks, and these can be employed for short bursts during a match once a team captures a certain number of spawn points, or kills a set number of enemies. They're a great way of turning the tide of war, and watching the faces drop on unsuspecting rivals is priceless when they realise your failing tactics were just a plot to play a saber-waving trump card. It adds a depth to the game that wasn't there before, and means that a lone gunner can make as much difference as a perfectly executed squad strike.
As if that weren't enough, there's a proper solo mode this time, following the exploits of the 501st Stormtrooper division. It feels a little like a well-meaning gesture than an actual crank-up in the single-player stakes, but it's well done and adds oh, a good 15 minutes to the game. At its core though, Battlefront II remains a walloping, beautiful example of what Xbox Live can do. It's bigger than the first, it's better than the first, and if there's any justice, it'll be what everyone will be playing come release. Impressive. Most impressive.
STAR WARS JEDI KNIGHT: JEDI ACADEMY
The only big change from Jedi Knight II is Live compatibility. Shabby presentation
First-person shooter - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 7.7/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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LA01102E)
StarJK.txtRead Review
Spare a thought for the stormtroopers. If they're not getting cleaved with lightsabers or blasted in their hundreds, they're being throttled to death by their own masters. We've lost count of how many we've killed over the years. In fact, it now takes really good gameplay to keep us from never wanting to see another Star Wars game again. Sadly, Jedi Academy fails to deliver, barring very scarce improvements over last year's mediocre Jedi Knight II (Issue 10, 6.5).
One major change is the chance to build your Jedi from scratch. There's a guilty pleasure in being able to play as an overweight Rodian with a double-bladed sabre. Force powers are customisable too, but don't expect the same level of stat-fiddling as in KOTOR (Issue 20, 9.5).
After each level, you're given a stat point to upgrade your powers. It's a pity that points aren't awarded on the basis of how many enemies are defeated or how long it took to complete the level. You trundle through missions with no real sense of urgency or excitement. Despite this, Jedi powers like levitation and Force Push are still fun to use. We'd have liked some new ones, though. Don't expect any crises of conscience either - in this game you're a good guy, pure and simple.
Levels are a bit more varied in this sequel. One has you riding a tauntaun through the icy wastelands of Hoth and another has you saving prisoners from a rancor. Our favourite scenario is when you crashland on Blenjeel. A hideous sandworm lurks below the desert and you have to keep off the ground to avoid being eaten.
Unfortunately, the graphics are a letdown, whatever planet you're visiting. Coruscant and Tatooine should be thriving with smugglers, traders, scum and villainy. Instead, all we get are a few scattered R2 units and one ugly bounty hunter after another. It's not as if the enemies behave convincingly either. Some of them just stand still while taking multiple hits and we've even seen one of the bosses accidentally jump to his death. This doesn't really add up, because the AI for multiplayer bots is actually quite solid.
Multiplayer is definitely the highlight of Jedi Academy, especially with Xbox Live. Up to eight warriors can fight at one time, or you can use seven bots if you aren't on Live. Most arenas are carefully designed with multiple raised platforms, elevators and pitfalls. Force powers have to be used with great skill. The real excitement begins when you're caught in the middle of a four-Jedi lightsaber melee and suddenly there's enough fireworks to make the graphics quite appealing.
Ultimately, if you're going to climb into a Jedi's robes, it has to be for the right reasons. Jedi Academy fails on almost every level as a single-player FPS, but succeeds as a very different multiplayer experience.
STAR WARS JEDI KNIGHT II: JEDI OUTCAST
Better than Star Wars: Obi-Wan, but it still doesn't pull up any trees
Action adventure - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 6.5/10
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AV02104E)
StarJK2.txtRead Review
A lightsaber is undoubtedly the coolest weapon never invented. Forget the sword of Excalibur - the Jedi's fluoro stick of death is the special branch on the weapons tree. Playing with one, and a little bit of feelin' the Force, are the biggest attractions of Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast.
What you're served with here is a Lucas cocktail of two parts Dark Forces (the original Star Wars first-person shooter, of which this game is a descendant) and one part Tomb Raider; originally shaken and stirred in a PC and now offered up on Xbox.
If you have visions of immediately firing up your trusty 'saber and slicing and dicing Stormtroopers left, right and centre then you're going to be in for a long wait.
Several levels need to be completed before things start to actually become fun. The early stages are like playing Dark Forces by numbers. Go to room A, kill all the dumb bad guys and flick a switch. Go to room B, kill all the dumb bad guys and enter a code. Go back to room A and flick another previously hidden switch that lets you go to room C. Go there and kill all the dumb bad guys. Then try and find a route to room D. Rinse and repeat...
There's no sense of urgency to events. Much of the experience simply involves running around an empty map trying to find out what switches need to be activated in order to enter new areas, many of which look like the end result of a go at Star Wars Scenery Builder v1.1
Even after you've earned the way of the lightsaber and started learning cool force tricks, it's still just a case of having more novel methods of killing the Empire scum while finding codes or hunting down keys to open other areas or activate a beacon.
One redeeming feature is the Jedi Arena option, a series of multiplayer games - with bots for single players - unlocked as you progress through the main adventure. The arcade-style enjoyment of swishing the lightsaber and using Force powers you get in these events is missing from the game proper.
There are a few genuine moments of Star Wars magic, such as walking into a full-scale lightsaber battle, and rare occasions of interaction with well-known characters from the movies. It's just that these good bits are wrapped up tighter than a Jedi's robe in winter, resulting in a frustrating chore of a game with infrequent highlights that could have offered much more.
More innovative missions would've better complimented the kudos of wielding the glowing rod of death.
STAR WARS: JEDI STARFIGHTER
A dose of enjoyable space combat needing more action to shine
Shooter - Issue 5 (July 2002) - 7.4/10
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LA00502E)
StarJS.txtRead Review
Life on other planets? Who knows. In recent years, it's been more likely that we'd discover a packet of moist towelettes on the dark side of the moon than find a decent video game based on Star Wars.
Collectively, they've formed a solar system of dull, lifeless rocks orbiting the LucasFilm licence, with only an occasional comet of bright, shining creativity truly reflecting the franchise.
Before this metaphor string becomes too spacey, let's just say that Starfighter is a pleasant sight in the night sky. You take on the role of two pilots: Adi Gallia, a well-spoken Jedi swot and Nym, a mercenary with plenty of 'tude, each with personal reasons for battling the dastardly Trade Federation, but ultimately joining forces to achieve a common goal.
It's Star Wars by numbers but, luckily, it's not a stinker. The missions vary in setting between average space battles and grand air-to-ground spats, and accurately capture the Star Wars motif of a band of plucky, talented underdogs fighting the odds and nefarious baddies for the sake of the universe.
You've a tight leash over the control of your craft and, despite every button having an important job, everything slots together nicely during play. You're rarely asked to make deft manoeuvres, since the action centres on deciding which things to shoot first rather than acrobatic air-to-air showdowns.
It's not as glam as the recent Rogue Leader on GameCube, but then it's not meant to be. Starfighter is more about dumping you in the hot seat of a Jedi craft with free reign of approach on a mission, as opposed to reliving some of the movie scenes in the comfort of your living room.
As such, it could do with a bit more depth and variety to flesh out the enjoyable skeleton of a space combat game that's already in place.
The game isn't faulty in any way, but it does begin to feel a little bland after extended play. Missions border on the repetitive, and sometimes it feels like the only variation comes in the form of the setting. You're scrapping it out with a fleet of enemy Scarab laser-fodder in deepest space, and the next you're doing the same job on the surface of a planet, battling around a base rather than a space station.
It can feel a little pedestrian, too, when you're taking potshots from afar (using the admittedly lovely zoom scope function) and wearing down the shields of the larger ships can be nothing but a chore.
Missions do feature the occasional crafty objective to break up the usual role of protect, seek and destroy. A stand-out moment, for example, occurs during the final mission of second chapter The Dragon's Den where you're required to fly into the bay of a Trade Federation installation and take out the reactor core.
You'll have to swoop under the hangar doors and manoeuvre around in a cramped space, making for a refreshing change of pace and scenery. Jedi Starfighter needed more clever tasks like this to punctuate the stagnant flow of sameness that some missions tend to evolve into.
What Starfighter does, it does well - better than some of the half-finished naffware we've played over the past few months - but it lacks that spark of thrilling adrenaline needed to elevate it into first division material.
It feels a bit unleaded and skimpy compared to the mad, hi-octane pyrotechnic rush of Gun Metal, but it's still a likeable and slick portion of space-based laser brawling.
STAR WARS: KNIGHTS OF THE OLD REPUBLIC
One of the most compelling games on any console ever
RPG - Issue 20 (September 2003) - 9.5/10
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LA00302E)
StarKOTOR.txtRead Review
Before we go any further into this review, just take a moment to close your eyes. Well, metaphorically at least. Now call up all your memories of past Star Wars videogames: the not so good, the bad, and the downright bloody atrocious. Gather them together in one single chamber of your mind and let them seep away into a distant galaxy far, far away. You don't need them anymore. These were not the games you were looking for.
The numerous quick-buck film tie-ins that have plagued Star Wars' video game mythology over the last two decades have had their time. Forget them. At long last it is time to enter the living, breathing Star Wars universe that every man, woman and child who ever loved the films has always ached to view from the inside looking out.
Knights of the Old Republic isn't your standard Star Wars game. In fact, it isn't in any way your standard video game, because BioWare - the developer of Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance (Issue 08, 8.5), MDK2 and the PC smash hit Neverwinter Nights - has succeeded in blowing open not only the whole tiring role-playing game genre, but also the world of adventure video games for good.
Any self-respecting gamer needs this title in their life. However, reviewing Knights of the Old Republic is a difficult proposition - to do it justice we really need to talk about the game, but by talking about the game we run the risk of spoiling elements that are best discovered by the virgin mind. So, if you're feeling brave, have a quick glance at the final score, smile to yourself and go make an essential Xbox purchase. But if you need to know a little more - and on your head be it - then read on, young Padawan.
Pigeonholing Knights of the Old Republic into a traditional video gaming genre is no easy feat. It draws upon so many elements from gaming's rich heritage that it deftly defies simple classification. Combat has all the fervency of a beat 'em up while the adventuring story is more akin to the 'choose your own adventure' books of yesteryear than anything else. But we'd better tell you now that underneath the bountiful layers of gameplay goodness rumbles a crusty old Dungeons & Dragons dice-rolling RPG engine. But fear not, you won't need to don a Red Dwarf T-shirt and avoid washing your hair to enjoy this masterpiece.
BioWare has taken only the very best elements of role-playing dice-based combat and gameplay and cunningly disguised them so the headache-inducing number-crunching is simple and enjoyable for the newcomer, yet deep enough for the hardcore. Combat, with characters using every imaginable weapon from the films and more, is in real-time but can be paused and tackled in the more traditional turn-based fashion if you so desire. In fact, how you want to play this game is more in your hands than ever before.
The meat of the game sees you controlling your own unique character, traversing seven planets and involving yourself in hundreds of mini-quests, building your character's own personality and unique story. As the game progresses, you slowly find out you are no mere nobody but have a strong affinity with the Force and a sense of destiny. Jedi training ensues and you choose your own path through the game with the overarching concern of either allying yourself with the light side Jedi or the dark side Siths.
If you hate RPGs and are feeling tempted to dismiss this right now - don't. There is so much more to KOTOR than floaty hit point numbers and inane NPCs. In fact, blink and you'll miss the fact this is an RPG at all. Whereas a traditional RPG has you levelling up by gaining experience points solely through fighting, KOTOR dishes out Exp for a multitude of reasons. Successfully convince a Sith guard to invite you to her party or pick a complicated lock to gain access to a high-security building and you'll not only further the story but also earn valuable experience to put towards your character's development.
You begin by picking your character, their sex, features and skills, ranging from ability at hacking computers to proficiency in persuasion. There's an option to let the Xbox choose all this for you, but to know your skills is to know your character. Then it's straight into the action as you find yourself aboard a vast spaceship under fire from the Sith armada.
Your ship has been attracting Sith attention due to its cargo: a valuable female Jedi Padawan by the name of Bastila. So far so New Hope, but if the names seem unfamiliar to you that's because this story is set 4,000 years before the events of the films. Whereas past games have relied on the stars of the films, from R2-D2 to the ubiquitous storm troopers, KOTOR relies on its own merits as a game to attract the punters.
The benefits of this anonymity are clear. While the comforting core basics of the Star Wars universe such as the Force, the Empire and the Jedi are present, the rest is a blank canvas. So the player approaches with no preconceptions or understanding. The ending of the story is unknown. The nine characters who join your party through the adventure are colourful and varied and right from the off you feel the weight of the universe around you, evidenced in the lavish care and attention in the minutiae of the plot and coherency of the world.
The main innovation in the game other than the combat is the interaction with NPCs. In most RPGs it quickly becomes tedious clicking 'A' on every man, woman and robot so they can spew out their pre-prepared and largely irrelevant comments. In KOTOR, talking becomes one of the most enjoyable aspects of the game as, after every sentence uttered by an NPC, the player has to select a response. You can play the good cop, the bad cop or just be plain indifferent if you prefer.
As you can fashion your own response to every conversation in the game, BioWare brings the issue of the light and dark side into play. By playing the bad guy and being rude to everyone, you will begin to shift towards the dark side, while being good and helping the weak will increase your light side affinity. This tussle between good and evil provides one of the focal points for the game and produces one of the most interesting innovations seen in games of this type for many years. Every action has a reaction but, unlike in most games where the player is placed on rails and must behave within the constraints of the game, in KOTOR you are given a freedom of choice that will ultimately affect the outcome of your adventure.
The game constantly throws moral choices at you. While many are clear-cut choices between good and evil (such as whether you should murder someone to steal their money or help them instead), some are not so easy to choose between. For example, at one point in the game you will encounter a distraught woman who has lost her droid. It transpires that her husband passed away some time earlier. An expert with technology, he had made this droid based on his own character to look after her if he died.
Said distraught female thinks the droid has been kidnapped and commissions you (should you want) to find him. Later that day you find the droid on a suicide mission. He informs you that the woman had got just a little too attached to him and had been treating him as her husband (if you know what we mean). He had run away to kill himself so that she would be forced to create new relationships and friendships with humans. Should you convince the droid to go back to the woman or should you aid his suicide? It's no easy moral choice (no matter whether you are looking to go to the dark or light side) and so the game forces you to think about what you would really do in this, albeit unlikely, scenario.
Because it's you making all the choices dialogue-wise, you soon become deeply attached to your character, far more so than in traditional pre-scripted Japanese-style RPGs. At each level-up point you can choose the stats and skills that you want to increase, adding even more control to the proceedings. So if you want your Wookiee to be an expert in healing your party and your droid to be a genius with computers, simply develop them as you see fit. Then select your party from the pool of characters that have joined you and approach problems whichever way you want.
The stunning soundtrack, mirroring themes from the films, helps to add to the epic sense of adventure, and the graphics, while not the best seen on Xbox, certainly do the job and provide some beautiful and varied vistas, from grey cyberpunk slums to rolling sunset-drenched hills. Perhaps the most impressive feat, however, is the fact that every single line of dialogue in the game is spoken. When you take into account all the possible responses to your answers, it makes the mind positively boggle and the feeling that you are participating in a huge film is accentuated.
KOTOR is one of the most compelling games we have ever played on any system. Prepare to lose meals and sleep over its problems and driving storyline. The pace of the adventure never lets up so, like the films, you are bludgeoned into sitting and watching what happens next. The game might not be for everyone, but the fact you now take an active part in the story and what happens makes the whole experience more transfixing than George Lucas could ever have dreamt. Mark our words; to fans of RPGs, developers looking to enter the genre, and even to games in general, KOTOR is as significant as Halo.
STAR WARS: KOTOR II: THE SITH LORDS
Takes all that was good from KOTOR, places it in a far more oppressive place, then throws you in to deal with it
RPG - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 9.3/10
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Kotor2.txtRead Review
Your eyes flick open and you're floating in an automised treatment tank. To your left and right, other treatment tanks, inside of which bob the swollen corpses of those you do not know. On the medical bay floor lay scattered droid parts, medical equipment laid to waste, and the bodies of dozens of Republic soldiers. You have no clothing, no companions, no weaponry, and the ship you are on is tumbling through the blackness of space, crippled and belching out power cells. You are the last known Jedi Knight, and this is, by all accounts, your last hour alive. Expect no mysterious realisation of your Force powers as in KOTOR (Issue 20, 9.5), there will be no Jedi training at the peaceful Dantoonie academy, and there most certainly is not a merry band of outer space misfits eager to join you on your romp through the stars. You are alone and frightened for the vast majority of the beginning of KOTOR II, and that is exactly how it wants you. For a sequel to such a classic title, it was almost expected that the follow-up would 'do' an Empire Strikes Back. Well, it not so much 'does' an Empire Strikes Back, as 'out does' it. If you want dark side fury and hopelessness for all that is good in the galaxy, KOTOR II's got it in spades.
Beginning the game as you do (in a pair of pants with the entire Sith on your back), the natural instinct is to equip yourself with a lightsaber as soon as possible, but this, as with so much else in KOTOR II, is something you must pay for in blood and sweat. Nothing is a given in The Sith Lords, and this includes your not-so-merry band. For the first few hours of play (four or five without subquests, touching double figures with), there is nothing to do but run. The hunt is on and you'll find yourself making desperate, frantic dashes across many worlds to escape the Sith's clutches. Initially there is no choice of destination (unlike the original), for the first hours are desperate times that see you lunging from one stay of execution to the next while you try and piece together what the hell is happening. You will be worn, beaten and humiliated by the time the pursuit eases a little. You'll resent the game for making you suffer hours of relentless, seemingly hopeless fleeing, but trust us, you'll appreciate it. Obsidian's decision to make you defenceless for so long was a risk, but the moment you cobble together your first makeshift 'saber it's like rediscovering what made KOTOR so great in the first place. And from then on in, you're armed almost well enough to start investigating this most devious and delicious of stories. "I am your father" doesn't even come close.
By the time you finally knock together your lightsaber you'll have met and worked with several new companions from across the galaxy. Unlike the cock-sure Mission and Wookiee pal Zalbaar, or cantankerous but loveable gramp Jolee Bindo, this new bunch are far from affable. Each has an agenda and seems to be helping you only because it suits them, not because they are particularly beheld to you. This causes friction within the group, which, naturally, you're left to resolve. The implementation of potentially volatile 'side taking' within the party is just the first of many new, interwoven elements of KOTOR II. Depending on how long you listen to someone, or how often you heed their advice, their opinion of you will rise or fall, as will their Force alignment. Others in the party who disagree with your actions (light or dark) will then cease to offer help, so there is potential for your team, the people you'll rely on to save your life, to implode from within. As well as saving the galaxy it seems a Jedi must be trained in the art of family counselling too. The seemingly obvious answer to this is to go around doing the right thing, but as Kreia, the Obi-Wan of the piece, points out, simply doing the right thing is no longer adequate. Through the new Force Bond you can see, via Kreia's telepathy, the consequences of your actions. You may give a beggar credits, but then to witness him murdered for them makes you question and second guess everything you're asked to do. There are deep, entangled machinations at work, and every consequence, be it the smallest gesture, directly affects your team's fate. Trying to be good can, from a certain point of view, lead to the dark side.
As the mystery of KOTOR II slowly unravels, so does the galaxy. Eventually, the free-roaming planet-hopping of KOTOR comes back into play, but don't think for one minute we're going to tell you why. Suffice to say, it's something far graver and more complex than piecing together parts of a star map.
Carth Onasi's homeplanet Telos makes an appearance, as does Jedi academy planet Dantooine. New planet Onderon and its moon Dxun, mining planet Peragus, Sith homeworld Korriban, refugee world Nar Shaddaa and the Mandalorian world of Malachor V all make for good exploration. Each is swollen with adventure, but it would've been nice to have visited at least one familiar planet from the films. The mere appearance of Tatooine in the first game gave it a grounding and familiarity and, while KOTOR has always seemed to pride itself on being unique from the movies, the lack of movie locations this time makes the galaxy seem more distant and unwelcoming. The planets lack KOTOR's awe and splendour, and aren't as visually arresting. These are bleak, uninviting places that all have more than a touch of the dark side about them. Whether it works or not is a matter of conjecture but maybe it's just another bold move to reflect the game's tone.
On each world there is a goal to be met by way of subquests and chatter much like in KOTOR, but the dialogue has been streamlined considerably, allowing more time for those panicked, breathless escapes and battles that threaten to overwhelm you at every moment. This also serves to make Darth Sion, Darth Nihilus, shadowy antagonists and 'other' Darths far more of an enigma than Malak ever was. Whereas some indication of Malak's motives and weakness were hinted at, this time there are none. You cannot train in any specific discipline in the hope it'll be the one you think will serve you in the final conflict because you simply don't know the shape of the threat. The best you can hope is to avoid Sith detection and make the best of your gifts. There are a few new ones, but still caution is recommended. Just because a glut of chokes and mind controls have been introduced doesn't mean your task will be any easier.
Force Scream, Force Revitalise, Beast Control and Battle Meditation seem to have the greatest impact, but the learned physical attributes really pack a wallop. When you're on your way to becoming a fully fledged Force-user, moves blaze from your body. You'll scream through the air towards an opponent on the other side of the room and strike them down before they've even raised arms. The air will crackle as you unleash volley after volley of hits and, thanks to the vastly improved work benches, just about everything you possess can be modified. New lightsaber crystals add colours and attributes; old weapons can be stripped of their component parts and remade into grenades, mines or upgrades. Chemicals and compounds can be conjured on lab benches to create new medipacs or antidotes, just as you can now imbue your 'saber with its own Force alignment. Whatever you do, it does. If you're focused and wise, its strike will be sure; if you're quick to anger, the hit ratio will fluctuate wildly.
Despite the handy, but not necessarily vital peripheral differences of Force powers and upgraded attacks, the core of KOTOR II is still BioWare's engine and game structure. Obsidian has added new feats but more would've been welcome. The Jedi body models didn't all have to be human, did they? And fully customisable faces should be a prerequisite these days, but aren't included. But what Obsidian has done is wise. It's realised that the strength of this fledgling series lies not so much in gadgets and gizmos, but in the plot and its telling. Extras in KOTOR II are just about adequate, and the return of time-wasters like Swoop Racing and Pazaak are okay, but it's the story that's the clincher. It doesn't have the spectacle or rip-roaring adventure of KOTOR, but what it lacks in dazzling planets and invention is more than compensated for by the undeniably superior story. The war you fight this time is a war against unseen enemies and unsure consequences. It is a war of shadow and silence that strikes at you from the darkness, and from that confused awakening in the automised treatment tank to the final wrenching, sucker-punch twist, you'll be totally and utterly mesmerised. An equal to KOTOR's might.
STAR WARS: OBI-WAN
A criminal waste of the Star Wars licence
Action adventure - Issue 3 (May 2002) - 3.3/10
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StarObiwan.txtRead Review
Are you a Star Wars fan? Do you enjoy seeing your favourite fantasy world routinely abused when it appears in game form? If you're nodding, then you'll appreciate Star Wars: Obi-Wan for offering hours of license-wasting fun.
It's not like this is a game without ideas, rather that the good ones are just badly implemented. So good idea - lightsabre control is assigned to the right thumbstick, theoretically allowing you to fluidly swish the weapon as you navigate the levels.
And bad application - it has all the deftness of the Wanster hacking through an invisible jungle with a Duracell-powered machete, making the Jedi look like a post kick-out drunk doing Luke Skywalker impressions, 'Zwingg' sound effects included. Graceful combat goes out the window, skirmishes are awkward and it just doesn't allow for any application of skill.
Still, there's good idea number two - Jedi moves. While these allow our Obi to Force-throw objects towards enemies, push distant bad guys over ledges, execute big jumps and even activate a bit of slow-motion bullet time, Max Payne (Issue 02, 7.9) did it first and much better.
Taking out a battle droid with your Lightsaber, leaping out of trouble and killing a couple more by Force-throwing a nearby rock into them is satisfying stuff. And yet...
Although Force skills are the most enjoyable aspect, you never feel as if you're ready to Jeddy because the game's sloppier than tonguing Jabba the Hutt. The lock-on camera system (focusing on enemies) doesn't work properly, and the poor overall design does its best to suck out any fun derived from messing about with cosmic forces.
Example? Getting shot by a distant sniper hidden by fogging is frustrating because you can't do anything about them during Saber duels, and annoying because you can't counter them skillfully. How do you stop these off-screen enemies ruining everything? By hammering the attack buttons, running a lot and hoping they don't get you. The way of a Jedi this is not.
Another thing going to waste during an Obi-Wan session is the Xbox graphics chip. This looks like a PSone game with a slightly higher resolution - rubbish textures, scant detail and a stuttery frame rate make it a truly abysmal game to look at and a missed opportunity. Let's hope Knights of the Old Republic puts a bit of credibility back into the increasingly battered Star Wars licence.
STAR WARS: REPUBLIC COMMANDO
An amalgamation of every quality shooter but one that works so well and is so much fun to play it's forgivable
Screenshots - FPS - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 9.0/10
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SWRComm.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




It is a time of great celebration in Lucas Valley. The games unleashed from the bearded one's empire used to be of variable quality, but they've recently crept into 'outstanding' territory. First we had a double helping of that 4,000-year-old RPG stuff to wrap our grey matter around, and now we get this little beauty. It's the polar opposite of all that dialogue-based soul-searching and Jedi hocus-pocus, but boy oh boy, is it good. And there's not a single lightsaber in sight.
Republic Commando is no normal FPS, despite its fairly run 'n' blast appearance. It borrows heavily from Full Spectrum Warrior's (Issue 30, 9.2) breathless tactical forward-thinking gameplay, just as it happily picks over Halo 2's (Issue 36, 10.0) sense of epic storytelling (although never matches it, naturally). There are claustrophobic Doom 3 (Issue 40, 8.5) moments stuck in conduits and corridors creeping with death, and there are elements of Aliens thrown in for that extra zesty 'soldiers in shit' touch. In fact, Republic Commando is as much about the survival and comradeship of your four-man squad as it is about killing aliens. The brothers - Boss, Scorch, Fixer and Sev - act as individuals when required, but work best as a cohesive unit. They are the most vital weapon in the game and are devastatingly intelligent. And the AI? God knows where LucasArts got it from, but it's flawless. Not once did the characters get in our line of fire or act in any way to suggest AI oversights or corner cutting. Their swift, surgical approach to combat has to be seen to be believed. And, better still, whenever you want to take control of them, they obey.
With a simple order system controlled solely through looking at something on screen and pressing 'A', the right person for the job instinctively goes and does whatever it was you'd hope they'd do. If you want a door breached, a mine laid, or a droid dispenser 'dealt with', the AI reads your mind and goes off to do its job. Not once did the AI fail us, and that's fantastic.
Levels also make damned sure we make good use of the squad, throwing us into what would surely be no-win situations if guns and blasters were our sole dependence. By a quick assessment of the situation and a few barked orders to the men, we were mounting turrets, holding back seas of droids that would seek to flank us, and, by the skin of our clone teeth, managing to somehow secure success. It's bastard hard in parts, but thinking on your feet will get you through where blasting will only get you fried.
Aesthetically the levels could have done with a little more invention and quantity. Geonosia, an abandoned Separatist ghost ship, and Wookiee planet Kashyyyk are our lot, and despite the epic scale of each, Star Wars is so rich with worlds and cultures, it's a shame more wasn't made of it. What we do get through, is attention paid to the smallest aspects which are, like the AI, flawless. Lighting, particle and character physics are all exemplary. Seemingly trivial squad banter manages not only to add exposition and explanation to situations, but fleshes out the team beyond the obvious two dimensions, and the score is movie standard.
Some might piss and whinge that LucasArts has effectively recreated a simplified Full Spectrum Warrior in space (only with the ability to actually shoot) then felt compelled to label it Star Wars. There are very few indications that this is actually a galaxy 'far, far away' save for a few Wookiees and stray R2 units, but none of this matters. The experience treads that fine balance between shooter and strategy so well, that any non-Star Wars moments (shotguns and pistols in space, purlease!) are easily forgiven. It may not even be that original in the big scheme of things, especially as it borrows the juicy bits from just about everything else we've played, but it does so with such relish and panache that that too is completely forgivable. A clone it may be, but a clone of merit nonetheless. Take a bow George, you've done it again.
STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS
Forgettable solo. Online, it's an intense mix of action and strategy
Action - Issue 18 (July 2003) - 8.0/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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StarClone.txtRead Review
As Yoda would knowingly say, "First Stars Wars game for Xbox Live, it is. First Stars Wars game on Xbox that's any good, too, it is."
Oh, and as if that wasn't enough, it's the first Star Wars console game to be based on Episode III of the long-running Lucas saga. That's right, The Clone Wars actually has very little to do with Attack of the Clones.
Although it starts with the battle of Geonosis (the bit before Yoda fights Dooku in the film), the plot revolves around giving the Republican side a hand in a fully fledged galaxy-wide war against the Separatists. Dooku, as you'd expect, features heavily as the arch-villain behind a scheme to build a machine to harvest the Force from all living things. Fear not, though, young Jedi, as you've got access not only to Anakin Skywalker but Obi-Wan Kenobi and Mace Windu, too. Not Yoda though, for all his teasing appearances.
Gameplay is a 16-level mix of combat in vehicles, on foot, on land and in the air. The only thing missing is the space war aspect, for which we'll refer you to the competent Star Wars: Jedi Starfighter (Issue 05, 7.4). In the course of one mission you're often called to switch transport rapidly: one minute you'll be on foot breaking out of a prison compound, the next you'll be escaping on a barnstorming STAP (Single Trooper Aerial Platform). You also get to pilot Speeder Bikes, two-legged Assault Walkers and dinosaur-like beasties called Maru. For the most part, though, you're on the ground in a speedy Fighter Tank or swooping around above it in a Gunship.
The controls are fairly similar throughout, and each vehicle has a special weapon, be it the turbo boost for escaping sticky spots in your Fighter Tank or the Gunships' homing lasers for taking out gun turrets. The quality of the missions varies pretty wildly. About half are dull, repetitive affairs, particularly those that require continuous circling in the Gunship as you clear an area of enemies. The rest, however, are frequently quite engaging and exciting, whether you're ambushing convoys or chasing sentry drones on your Speeder Bike.
But by far the best part of the missions is the sense you have of being a small cog in a much larger conflict. The battlefields of Clone Wars are littered with hundreds of units, from battalions of droids and clones shooting on the ground to fighters and transports zooming overhead. At several points in the game you also get a couple of squad mates, who can be directed with the Left directional pad to attack or defend at your bidding. For atmosphere, it's hard to beat.
Overall, though, single-player mode is not half as good as it should be, limited as it is by the controls (you do a lot of strafing) and dimwitted enemies (which are varied but require all-too-similar tactics to defeat). The final snag is the length of the game: it'll take most players a mere eight to ten hours to complete.
Despite these shortcomings, The Clone Wars is still a sensory treat. The number of vehicles the game's engine shifts around is nothing short of awe-inspiring, and units are rendered with a purist's adherence to the films. As you'd expect for a Star Wars licence, the audio is top banana, with a great cinematic score playing host to authentic laser blasts and some voice acting that could give Ewan et al a run for their money.
Which is all good news for the main reason you should buy Clone Wars: Xbox Live. While you can play the four multiplayer modes - Duel, Control Zone, Academy and Conquest - offline, Conquest only truly comes into its element online. Where Duel is a straight deathmatch, Control Zone a King of the Hill mode and Academy a co-op fight against AI swarms, Conquest is a little different. It's a two team game, and each side starts off with an HQ. The objective is to destroy the opposition's one.
Simple enough, you might think, but matters are complicated somewhat by outposts dotted around the map. Loiter on these outposts and your presence builds turrets followed by a factory to make units and an emplacement for a special weapon. You can even dock with these bases to take control of the weapon - one of which enables you to shoot and then control lethal missiles to pound the opposition with. As if that weren't enough to contend with, your HQ is also invulnerable until its shield generator gets shot up (which, invariably, happens a lot).
The result, especially with four players on each side, is an intense and demanding multiplayer action game with a large dose of strategy thrown in. It also makes great use of the Voice Communicator - if you don't talk, your team quickly gets outflanked and outmanoeuvred. It may not be anything special offline, but online Clone Wars will have you coming back time and time again. If you have Xbox Live, buy it you must.
STARSKY & HUTCH
Easy to play, good control, with lots to unlock and interesting modes
Driving - Issue 19 (August 2003) - 6.8/10
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Starsky.txtRead Review
When I was a nipper, if I hadn't misbehaved, I was occasionally allowed to stay up past my bedtime to watch Starsky & Hutch. This was '70s suburban England and in my house this was a cultural revolution. I'd normally have to fight my corner just to get a glimpse of the Daleks, never mind the gritty mean streets of urban America. Not that I understood much of what was going on. The pimps and hustlers that seemed to litter every downtown street corner could easily have been mates of Big Bird and his Sesame Street gang, such was their over-the-top lurid outfits.
Many of the characters in the show talked funny, walked funny, and had pretty weird names such as Huggy Bear (who, to my surprise, didn't look anything like Fozzy from The Muppets). The real attraction was that cool red car and those two smart-mouthed detectives who kept sliding across its bonnet in bell-bottom flares to the sound of wah-wah pedals squelching out funky tunes. But memory lane can go on forever - it's time to decide if '70s icons can cut it on next-gen consoles, and what better way to put it to the test than courtesy of Messrs Starsky and Hutch.
If you're old enough to remember the wise-crackin' crime-fighting duo, then you're certainly old enough to remember a classic arcade game called Chase HQ. It involved a series of police chases where you relentlessly pursue the baddies and run them off the road. It spawned a lesser-known sequel called Special Criminal Investigation where, at the touch of a button, a guy would climb out of a window and fire a gun at the intended target.
It's from this type of game that Starsky & Hutch largely draws its inspiration. The title is a driving/shooting game in which you and your trusty partner take to the mean streets to deliver your own brand of justice to all manner of car-loving villains. Law and order in the world of Starsky & Hutch normally involves shooting or ramming the target cars until they come to a grinding halt. But it's not as simple as just making sure the opposing cars don't pass their next MOT - the game is based as much on viewer ratings as it is on inflicting maximum vehicle damage.
The game views itself as an extension of the Starsky & Hutch TV show with the bulk of the missions taking place in Story mode. Each level represents an episode, with six episodes spread over three seasons. How well you do is entirely based on your Viewer Rating, which acts as both a countdown clock and a threshold to all the unlockable goodies.
Your viewer rating is affected in a variety of different ways. Shooting the bad guys is always a good option but you can also attempt cool stunts, shoot exploding barrels, drive through boxes, pull off long skids, drive on two wheels... basically anything that would be deemed exciting in order to keep the TV-loving public watching. If you get shot yourself, or run over a civilian, the viewers switch off... which would never happen in real life.
You'll be able to plough through each episode as long as you bring the runaway bad guys to a halt, but you won't be able to progress through to the other main Season stages until your Viewer Rating warrants enough gold badges (medals) to continue. This means that you'll play stages repeatedly to find ways to give you that valuable extra 50 viewer points and adds a precious drop of longevity in a title where the gameplay doesn't stray much from the first episode.
The city is littered with more power-ups than a Mario Kart track and you will spend as much time shooting icons as you will shooting the target car. You'll also get the chance to execute special events, which are generally automated sequences that are activated after you either drive through or shoot at a relevant icon - good for upping your vital Viewer Rating.
Handling is a doddle - at least with a single player using a controller. Aiming is based on a reticule that decreases in size and changes colour when you're guaranteed a decent shot. This is handy but it does make it a bit railed as you're not really free to target and shoot where you please.
The duo's beloved Zebrathree car behaves in a typical arcade driving fashion, so brace yourself for plenty of dashboard-grabbing handbrake turns and suspension that's more springloaded than a Magnum with a hair trigger. If you have wealthy mates, you can set up a driving/shooting combo team with one using a steering wheel and the other using a lightgun. We had mixed results with this - the steering seemed so light we were driving using two fingers (and not the way Max uses two fingers when behind the wheel) and the gun needed recalibration after playing through each stage. This may be a hardware issue on our side but it's still worth noting.
Starsky & Hutch is certainly a very entertaining title - there's no denying it's great fun to peg it through a narrow litter-strewn alley in hot pursuit of a bad guy, and jumping over ramps and blowing up barrels is always a laugh... but it's only going to take you so far. The episodes get repetitive quickly because, no matter how many unlockables there are, it'll never disguise the very one-dimensional style of gameplay on offer.
STATE OF EMERGENCY
Simple, comic book arcade thrills with no pretensions of greatness
Action - Issue 17 (June 2003) - 6.6/10
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State.txtRead Review
When you've got a good thing going, milk it. Such was the philosophy of Rockstar Games who followed up the comic ber-violence of GTA3 with a controversial riot sim that enabled players to beat AI-controlled foes into unconsciousness with a decapitated head. Sound like fun? Yes, we thought it might.
Now more than a year old on the PS2, State of Emergency's anarchic mayhem has been unleashed on Xbox, somewhat surprisingly considering the game wasn't exactly adored in its original inception. However, while the general gameplay has barely been tinkered with, there are two very good reasons why this 'update' might appeal. First is the lure of the new multiplayer modes for up to four joy-bashers to partake in. Second is the generous £20 price tag.
Set in a totalitarian future, the game's virtually redundant storyline tells the tale of rival gangs revolting against 'The Corporation'. And that's it. All this game is concerned with is rioting, maiming and total destruction. Two modes of play are available - Kaos and Revolution. Kaos is the most satisfying. It drops your chosen bruiser into the middle of a mass-scale rampage, where your aims are generally to muster a fixed number of points in set time limits. This is achieved by completing objectives, such as wiping out highlighted gang members, destroying vehicles and slaying rival gangs. Weapons are freely available, from bats, meat cleavers and park benches to rocket launchers, Molotov cocktails and discarded body bits. Revolution mode is near-identical beat 'em up fodder but with a sketchy unfolding tale that requires players to undertake specific goals such as protecting a gang member or retrieving documents. Sadly, the goals are all pretty mundane.
The addition of the various competitive and co-op multiplayer modes significantly bolsters the game's appeal. Multiplayer Kaos and Multiplayer Last Clone Standing are gruesome fun, but Deathmatch swallows the proverbial biscuit in terms of sadistic pleasure. Laying into a 40-strong crowd of baton-wielding henchmen with a burst of machine-gun fire isn't as controversial as it sounds because the events carry about as much credibility as an episode of Crossroads.
The main problem with State of Emergency is its repetitiveness. Playing is little more than an endurance test of how many times you can bash your gamepad buttons without losing patience or the feeling in your fingers. Also, there are only four environments to vandalise, and they hardly transcend the boundaries of human imagination.
Yet despite its obvious lack of longevity and sophistication, State of Emergency is surprisingly enjoyable, especially in the multiplayer modes. It's nowhere near as tasteless as its concept suggests, and we can think of far worse ways to spend 20 quid.
STEEL BATTALION
Will only appeal to gamers who appreciate a truly in-depth simulation
Mech shooter - Issue 14 (March 2003) - 7.8/10
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SteelB1t.txtRead Review
Steel Battalion and its Xbox Live update, Line of Contact, must rate among the most daring videogames of all time. Its creator, Atsushi Inaba, was so unsure at how Capcom would react that he conducted a large part of development without letting even his bosses see it.
Releasing a 40-button controller that could only be used with Steel Battalion games was a big gamble for Capcom, not just because it's expensive but also because it demands some serious dedication as a gamer.
Committed is one word for the Steel Battalion online community, but obsessed is a little more accurate. Don't expect to sign in and discover hordes of badmouthing children because most SB players are in their 20s and 30s, and totally serious about making the most of their £120 investment.
They're not only addicted to the intense three-on-three mech battles, but a whole host of features that you might not expect. Online trading, auctioneering, chatrooms and lobbies tailored for tactical planning demonstrate how the game integrates Xbox Live in new and advantageous ways.
At the heart of this online revolution is Campaign mode. Campaigns last for 60 real-time days with four armies of about 1,000 players competing over 100 territories. At the end of each week, Capcom's server tallies up how many skirmishes your army has won and awards territory to the victorious force. A single victory in battle, although important, won't change the overall outcome, transforming Campaign mode into a team effort on a massively multiplayer scale.
Players who thrived on the individual achievement of MechAssault (Issue 11, 8.0) online will still find satisfaction here, though. Medals, titles and rankings are awarded to expert players, displayed on your profile for everyone else to see. Aspirations are high and everyone wants a profile that will make new players shudder with fear.
Being a novice player isn't at all fun, unless you stick to players at your own level. Optimatch helps with this, but it won't help you to learn the controller inside out. Neither will it assist you in unlocking the more powerful Vertical Tanks (VTs) that only high-ranked players can purchase. At least you can be sure of earning ranking points, whether you stand triumphant or end up as smelting material.
Having only three VTs to choose at the start does seem a little too restrictive, but that's where trading and capturing comes in. Drop into any chatroom and players will be willing to trade VTs that you can't normally use, including some that Capcom releases onto the servers as limited editions. There's also a market for second-hand equipment, saved action replays and custom insignia designs. Capturing VTs is an evil technique where you deliberately shoot an enemy's legs off in battle. Their souped-up pride and joy then becomes yours to use or even sell back to your tearful victim.
All of these unique features create an unexpected MMORPG out of a graphically stunning mech warfare game. Most of the screens on this page are from Replay mode, the best way to appreciate the dirty but strangely alluring environmental effects. The VTs are also spectacularly designed, mind-boggling when you think that there are more than 30 to choose from. In-game, you're always confined to the cockpit view, but even this is intensely detailed and different for every single VT.
No matter how compelling, Steel Battalion does still have technical faults. The learning curve is absurdly steep (a good excuse to practise with the offline prequel), the interfaces are cumbersome and the servers are often laggy and unable to cope with five-on-five battles.
However, if you're looking for a game that truly makes the most of Xbox Live features then this is the most inventive to date. Teamwork on an epic scale and a simulation so realistic that you can almost smell the napalm makes this undeniably the greatest robot-fighting game of all time, albeit one you'll have to pay a premium for.
STEEL BATTALION LINE OF CONTACT
The best robot game ever. Evil learning curve, but well worth it
Mech action - Issue 29 (May 2004) - 9.0/10
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CC00901W)
SteelB2t.txtRead Review
The time of judgement has arrived, then. Steel Battalion: is it a good game in its own right, or just a gimmick, designed to accommodate the use of a gigantic novelty controller? Well, this review would be a lot easier to write if only the question were that simple - but the truth is, the game and its outsized giant of a controller are inextricably linked.
No matter how much you've read about Steel Battalion, or Tekki as it's known in the East, you're probably not prepared for how utterly mental it is until you've set it up in your house. It's as terrifying as it is appealing, as repellent to attractive women as it is bewitching to gaming fans. The practical question of where the hell to put it will be of as much importance to a buying decision as the sheer cost of the thing.
Should you overcome those hurdles though, you'll switch it all on, and get to the bit where you power up your mech for the first time. Then the controller bursts into life, all the buttons light up, and the whole thing starts to become something a bit special. A start-up sequence of no less than eight different buttons and switches is required before you can even get your Vertical Tank (VT) moving.
If the complexity of starting your mech up sounds a bit of a pain, then you should give up on the idea of enjoying Steel Battalion right now. Once in the field, the action only gets more brain-achingly complicated - just walking in one direction while looking in another, and constantly negotiating the environment effectively, can take a long while to feel natural.
Thankfully, you're not bombarded with the full array of the VT's functions right from the off. Trickier functions such as communication and chaff are sensibly only gradually introduced as you progress through the missions, meaning that mastering the controls is not as nightmarish as it might have been. It's still harder to learn than driving a car, though.
Once the controls finally start to click, Steel Battalion can be immensely enjoyable to play. Using the VT's functions correctly to clinically take out a group of enemies is as satisfying as any other game you care to mention - as with anything that's initially very difficult, getting better at the game is a very rewarding experience.
And the wealth of detail groups the game alongside titles such as Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball (Issue 14, 8.0) and Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance (Issue 13, 7.2) - it's clearly been a massive labour of love for its developers. Small things, such as the way the mechanical parts of the VT's dash move, or how the video feed suffers interference as you take damage, really help to make the experience more intense and believable, over and above the immersion already provided by the controller. Play the game with a decent surround sound setup or just a quality pair of headphones and it's easy to get swept up in the action.
Be warned, though: if ever a game will delight some and alienate others, it's Steel Battalion. The learning curve is very steep and can frustrate at first, and it takes far more effort - both physical and mental - to play the game than almost any other we've ever played. There are so many buttons, so much to keep track of, that for many the game could prove too much effort - more like work than fun.
Another issue is that the weight of expectation such a high price tag and exotic peripheral brings could prove too heavy for the game to bear. Whereas the Dreamcast's Samba De Amigo and maracas screamed out 'Fun!' to anyone who picked it up, the appeal of Steel Battalion isn't so universal. Ultimately, it's only going to appeal to gamers who appreciate a truly in-depth simulation and aren't put off by having to concentrate very hard indeed.
If you've considered the above and are still gagging for some Vertical Tank action, though, it's likely you'll find plenty to enjoy in Steel Battalion. It's by no means perfect: there's some pretty bad pop-up on occasion, and some of the presentation is a little cheesy. What's more, the much discussed save game deletion - die in the game and your save gets wiped - is a step too far in the direction of realism if you ask us. What might sound like a neat touch is in fact quite irritating when the event comes, particularly if you're a few missions in.
But despite the negatives, there's something fascinating about Steel Battalion. Regardless of whether it's because the controller has more lights on it than a fruit machine, or because the game itself is just so convincing and atmospheric to play, progressing through the levels is gripping stuff. And let's face it - if you've ever wanted to pilot a huge robot in a gritty future war, you're never going to get any closer than this.
STOLEN
A stealth game brought unceremoniously into the limelight by fundamental flaws. Disappointing and frustrating
Screenshots - Action adventure - Issue 41 (April 2005) - 5.0/10
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HP00101W)
Stolen.txtRead Review
Screenshots:
We feel robbed. Hours of our lives have been taken from us, but unfortunately Stolen didn't steal our hearts at all. Guilty of kleptomaniac criminality itself, Stolen lifts elements from just about every other stealth game out there, yet manages to bungle the entire job in one fell swoop.
At first glance everything looks promising: a sultry female lead, some nice lighting effects, and enough gadgets to make Inspector G jealous and which should make each tiptoeing task (stealing artefacts, hacking computers etc) enjoyable. This is true to some degree, as we used lead character Anya's impressive cat-like ability to swing, vault and slink our way through the shadows. But like an embarrassing uncle at a family wedding, all too familiar camera issues make an unwelcome appearance early on. Jerky rotation is compounded by the camera frequently getting stuck in walls, doors, and any other surface those inconsiderate developers put into the world. Factor in some fiddly controls (particularly during first-person mode where the R thumbstick switches from 'Look' to 'Zoom' with no warning), and we've got frustrating gameplay issues after hardly scratching the surface of the first level. Not so promising after all.
Once we become au fait with Anya's box of tricks (sonic emitters, tripwires and the like), the game picks up and we can indulge in numerous absorbing (read: time-intensive) stealth setpieces. Sonar vision is a great little touch that allows players to see through porous materials, such as doors; Anya has the ability to quietly whistle to create her own sonic waves from which to read. But it's the niggling itch you can't scratch, Etonian-sized schoolboy errors that really let Stolen down, requiring extra time to overcome a simple situation.
Anya has at her disposal Nullifiers, which, the handy Item interface reliably informs us, are used for incapacitating lights, guards and security cameras. Excellent, we thought, rubbing our fingerless Kevlar hands with glee. Reality hits home however when we tried shooting out lights to create our own cover, only to find these digital darts largely redundant. Frequent objectives required us to cross brilliantly (as in bright, not accomplished) lit areas, with no alternative but to get spotted by patrolling guards. Very occasionally we stumbled across lights that were 'shootable', though this is of little consolation after such disappointment.
Appalling guard AI doesn't help either. Confined to retreading the same route again and again, even getting spotted (and shot at) doesn't deter them from blithely waving a flashlight in your direction before getting bored and going back to their posts. If you do get close to one, combat is a tediously repetitive bout of trading blows with the Y button, fastest finger first style. Anya's tree-hugging inability to kill means guards will come round after a frustratingly short time, then hide for a while, then get bored and wander back to their doughnuts. There's almost no point in being stealthy.
It's a shame. We really wanted to like Stolen. However, after being spoiled over the last few years by the brilliance of the Splinter Cell series, lacklustre and ultimately flawed titles like Stolen get spotted a mile off. More bungling thief than Entrapment-esque vixen, this is a criminal excuse for a stealth 'em up.
STREET FIGHTER: ANNIVERSARY COLLECTION
You can play any fighter against any other, but very little else has changed. Live play is a bonus
Beat 'em up - Issue 35 (November 2004) - 5.9/10
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CC01503W)
StreetFight.txtRead Review
Tatsumaki Senpukyaku! Shoryuken! Um... Judo Chop! Yes, it's been 15 long years down this old videogaming highway, but still those cries ring out across the land as misty-eyed nostalgia has us looking back on the SF collection. Bundled together are Street Fighter II (World Warriors, Championship Edition, Turbo, Super and Super Turbo editions), and Street Fighter III: 3rd Strike, and what a weird sight they are.
Times have a'changed and, as fondly as we remember Street Fighter, we can't help but look upon it like an old dog. You love it but if it pisses on the floor one more time you'll put it down.
To add some spruce, this collection is online compatible and you can play any fighter against any other, whether it's Ken from the original SFII or Turbo Edition Ken with his extended Dragon Punch. But beyond that, very little has changed; it's all just been opened up and laid bare. Every SF character is here, but they're still animated at a framerate which these days wouldn't make submission.
Thankfully, despite the clearly creaking gameplay, the Xbox controller deals well with the demands of the multi-button combos, leaving your thumbs mildly aching rather than crippled (handy when those car-smashing levels have been included again), and there is a certain sense of feeling like a kid again when you get Blanka to frazzle his opponents, but we've grown up and moved on, just as this series should have done. Catching up with Chun Li and chums is fine and the replay value is bolstered by the chance to play all the character variations but it's one strictly for nostaligia buffs.
STREET HOOPS
Unrewarding and uninvolving sports fest with little substance
US sports - Issue 9 (November 2002) - 6.2/10
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AV00301E)
StreetHoops.txtRead Review
Being dope and being dopey are two separate things. Someone should explain the difference to the teams in Street Hoops, because as they do their thang on the 14 urban courts in the game, they clearly have the two concepts confused.
Your players just don't get involved in the play as much as the CPU opposition's do. When you're defending the basket, your opponents are swarming the key, each one threatening to break at any second and pound home an air dagger of a slam dunk.
But when you're on the attack, your team is reluctant to get anywhere near the basket, milling about and leaving you with the sole responsibility of getting in there and scoring. At times, they just stand around, possibly fantasising about a sponsorship deal.
It's frustrating when your crew are so apathetic. Fluid, satisfying action doesn't happen as often as it should, despite your best efforts. Players having dazzling ball skills is all well and good, but when they connect together in such a patchy manner, the end result is a letdown.
Schizophrenic use is made of the controller. Being able to pass with the Right thumbstick is an inspired idea - just point with it, and pass. Certain moves, however, require use of the White button and the Back button, and reaching for those two just isn't practical when you're in the thick of the action (the same thing goes for Mat Hoffman's; Issue 09, 5.0).
In fact, you'll probably have the most fun fiddling with the between-match options available in Career mode. With your earned cash, you can invest in a tattoo (think hard: in-game laser removal treatment costs a fortune), or kit your team out in ghetto fabulous neck ice and gold chains, just so your opposition knows how loaded your boys (or girls) are. Pay a visit to the hairdresser, too. Cornrows come highly recommended.
But outside of these cosmetic distractions, the game proper is underwhelming. Sure, a flamboyant Tea Bag move is always satisfying, replay and victory pose included. But setting moves up just isn't slick or as fun as it should be.
Street Hoops is definitely the most streetwise game on Xbox so far, but it only has a little substance to back up all that bling-bling.
STUBBS THE ZOMBIE IN REBEL WITHOUT A PULSE
Brain-eating action where YOU are the zombie! Without a pulse, without guts, and without a clue either...
Action - Issue 53 (March 2006) - 6.6/10
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AY00202E)
stubbs.txtRead Review
Stubbs The Zombie is a truly strange game, but we can't put our finger on precisely why that is. It's built on the Halo engine, it's about turning the world of man into a shuffling horde of brain munchers, it's original, funny, and spectacularly well intentioned, but there's a strangely hollow thud in everything under the bonnet. It's as though developer Wideload had all the ingredients ready for a perfect title, then dropped them on the floor on the way to the oven.
Rebel Without a Pulse (is the subtitle an indication of future Stubbs games in the works?) is a collection of many bright ideas, none of which are developed to their full potential. Our undead hero can drive about in tractors and 'Clodmobiles' - clearly just the Warthog and Banshee with different skins - but it never really feels as though he should. He can detach his noggin and roll it around like an explosive bowling ball, but does the game ever actually need you to do so? Nope.
Stubbs lurches from one location to the next without any kind of story to explain why. He can be eating farmers one minute, then blowing up a dam the next, but it's never very clear why he's doing it. Sprinkled as it is with funny moments, Stubbs always feels like a series of slightly broken, unfinished bits and pieces of a modified Halo engine, squished together in the best way Wideload could manage.
While Stubbs is chomping brains or possessing people with his ghoulish hand and you're 'in the moment', the game can actually be great fun. Watching chewed corpses get up and start chewing for themselves made us feel a little paternal, we have to admit. Shoving zombies about and towards the action in search of fresh meat is fine and dandy, but that's all they really do. We can see that Wideload has tried to make the most of the zombies in the game's puzzle elements, by having them complete electric circuits or utilising them as shields. But as with so much in the game, the zombie mechanics never feel like they're actually working properly - rather like actual zombies, we suppose. Your new undead friends will shuffle about a bit and eat a few heads capably enough, but they never shift up a gear, always ambling about when the game should be racing along.
The strongest part of Stubbs lies on the surface in the form of what there is to see and hear, rather than touch and play. The soundtrack is superb, rich with classic 50s rock 'n' roll, love songs and Hawaiian melodies. Chewing heads down to the neck to the sound of The Chordette's 'Mr Sandman' is a highlight, while watching all-American teens run about screaming while 'My Boy Lollipop' plays over a diner's jukebox is classic stuff.
The kitsch 1950s Americana is everywhere you look in Stubbs, from mad scientists waving laser beams about, to the strange grainy filter Wideload has dolloped all over everything. Fresh off the back of Destroy All Humans! (Issue 44, 8.4), Stubbs feels somewhat samey (although to be fair it was in development at around the same time, and the team has done well). But, for all the natty ideas and incidental goings-on that take place as you shamble your way through the game, there's a distinct impression that Wideload thought the words 'built on the Halo engine' would carry all the weight. But Halo should have been the foundation for something great, not a crutch to lean against. One bad guy is even called Chief Masters. We don't need reminding, and it does the game a disservice.
Creating Stubbs from scratch might have been a wiser idea. At times it feels like little more than zombie's clothes on scraps of Halo code, less fun than it sounds. It's a brave attempt to do something different, and flashes with momentary munching goodness, but like the poor zombie himself it just doesn't have the guts to see it through.
SUDEKI
One of the best-looking games on Xbox. A brillant, vibrant adventure romp with superb AI
RPG - Issue 32 (August 2004) - 8.7/10
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MS01001W)
Sudeki.txtRead Review
We can just see it now. The episode of Jerry Springer where some RPG fan with a blue rinse is singing the praises of Sudeki. He's changed his name to Tal and has turned into a pyromaniac, setting off fireworks left, right and centre to show off his 'skill strike'.
Do you fall into this category? There's no shame in it because we've all been there. Spending 40 hours on Knights of the Old Republic (Issue 20, 9.5) and Final Fantasy VII was absolute heaven. But we're not the only ones; it's equally apparent that the makers of Sudeki are just as mad about adventuring.
We can't confirm that the Climax development team has pink hair, but it's obviously been reading obsessively the encyclopedia of Japanese RPGs. Just like the aforementioned fireworks, Sudeki is a sprinkling of oriental elements, mixed to explosive effect. It's an extremely traditional role-player, most obviously a throwback to SquareSoft's Secret of Mana and the massively popular Legend of Zelda series.
In Sudeki's awe-inspiring introduction, we're introduced to four heroes living in the fairytale kingdom of Illumina. They're cute and they're annoying but it's little wonder when they live in such peaceful and prosperous times. It's all thanks to Queen Lusica who rules the bright empire like a vindictive mother-in-law. Her latest scheme is to protect the kingdom from invaders by creating a powerful energy shield.
To achieve this, she needs magical crystals and that's where you come in. Controlling Tal, Ailish, Buki and Elco, you venture out into hostile lands and deathtrap dungeons to retrieve the magical stones. Although we can't get away from the fact that the four heroes are horribly clich?d ('traditional' can only go so far), the team dynamic is still very entertaining.
That's not just in the way that teamwork is required to solve puzzles, but the way the characters squabble just like friends do in real life. Elco's the lovechild of Dexter and Harry Potter, but he still thinks he's a ladies' man. This really annoys Ailish and Buki who don't take sexism lightly. Buki is especially peeved when the two blokes stumble into the trap of Nassaria the siren. Funny moments like this go a long way to making you warm to the four discordant heroes.
Sudeki's plot winds and twists cleverly, making sure that you control all four heroes rather than just sticking to your favourite one. In the opening mission you'll control just Tal, but from there on you'll use different parties. Learning how to make different heroes work together is bags of fun.
In combat, teamwork is especially important. Battles are real-time and there's a massive difference between the sword-swinging warriors Tal and Buki and the projectile-firing sneaks Ailish and Elco. Melee combat is a lot like Dynasty Warriors (Issue 23, 6.5). You tap away at the X and A buttons to hack 'n' slash, and the better your timing, the more damage you do. There are about 20 normal combos to learn.
In comparison, ranged combat is totally wacky! When controlling Ailish and Elco, the game switches into FPS mode, but sadly it's not particularly good. Very little skill is required to point your crosshair in the right direction and hold the trigger down while running backwards. Even the teleporting monsters have trouble catching you. We reckon that melee combat has the edge, but shooting is useful if you want to take the cheap (but energy-preserving) option. One good thing about ranged combat is that some projectiles pass through multiple creatures, adding an element of skill. Tactics also come into play as you choose which 'enchantments' to add to your weapons. These add spice to your attacks, like afflicting the enemy with poison and weaker armour.
If you're an RPG purist balking at the frantic real-time combat, don't give up just yet! Bringing up the quick menu makes everything slow down to quarter-speed, giving you space to choose from a list of Final Fantasy-style 'skill strikes'. These setpieces are a great visual sensation, not to mention extremely damaging to any enemies foolish enough to be in the vicinity.
Sudeki's monsters look so incredible though, that it seems a shame to slay them. They're an odd mix of killer robots, insectoid sorcerers and Harryhausen-esque mythical beasts. When it comes to monsters, the bigger the better. Sudeki's boss creatures, particularly Krenn and Nassaria, are easily the highlight of the game. The animation is superb, their range of attacks always surprising and their AI first-rate. We're always pleased to see monsters working as a team, and Sudeki's magical creatures will usually enchant and heal their kinsman rather than just attacking you. Beating them first will save you a lot of grief.
But it's not just the creatures that look amazing. In Sudeki you get three worlds to explore, and they all look absolutely astonishing. When walking through Transentia for the first time, you really won't believe that this is just a game. Wherever you look, there are incredible details like windmills turning in the distance or legions of mining robots wandering the walkways far below. It's easy to lose yourself, but thankfully you'll never actually become lost.
Although it takes around 15 minutes to walk from Illumina castle to Brightwater on the opposite side of Light World, the HUD game map is so good that you'll never take a wrong turn. This is also partly because the worlds are very linear, but more on that later.
Sudeki's intelligent game camera also helps you enjoy the gorgeous worlds to their fullest. The camera tracks behind your party, switching to cinematic angles when you're doing skill strikes and solving puzzles. Best of all, the camera can always be rotated and zoomed using the Right thumbstick. You'll never miss out on the best view of the action.
It's undeniably a very linear game, and the sub-quests don't have enough of a hook to make you want to complete them all. Whether you fall in love with this will really depend on whether you prefer sprawling worlds with little detail, or Sudeki's smaller worlds with mind-blowing quantities of graphical splendour. Personal taste will also decide how much you like the storyline. It isn't freeform in any way, but it's still enthralling and very well realised.
Ultimately, Sudeki falls a long way short of the scale and longevity of Knights of the Old Republic, but then again, it's a very different kind of adventure. We love Sudeki. It's a colourful, beautiful adventure with a refreshing and distinctive feel. We're sure you'll be dyeing your hair pink in no time.
SUPER BUBBLE POP
No addictive qualities, and full of bad techno cheese
Puzzle - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 4.0/10
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JA00404E)
SuperPop.txtRead Review
Get the puzzle formula right, and you get a stupidly addictive game. See Tetris for details. Also, if your puzzler includes bubbles and cutesy characters, la Puzzle Bobble/Bust-a-Move, it should be really good fun. Super Bubble Pop has the bubbles and cute characters - could it be a Puzzle Bobble for our times?
The concept is simple. You control the chap/ chapess at the bottom of the screen, and must use their bubble-firing gun to launch spheres of varying hue at similarly coloured bubbles nestling at the top of the screen. When three bubbles of the same colour meet, they'll burst. Repeat until you've cleared the screen and eventually the level.
As you'd expect, this is trickier than it sounds, thanks to several factors. As with Puzzle Bobble, you'll often find that the bubble you really need tends to be a no-show, forcing you to manage your bubbles at lightning-fast speed if you're to win the level. To make matters worse, the bubbles slowly move towards the front of the screen, and if they reach the front it's game over. Add in special blocks that hinder or help, plus various power-ups, and there's potential here for plenty of nightmarishly hectic puzzling.
Sadly though, it doesn't get anywhere near Puzzle Bobble's status as best bubble-based puzzler. For a start, the mechanism that made PB so skilful - the aiming technique that allowed for angled shots and so on - is replaced here by a more basic left- and right-scrolling style of bubble shooting, making it less involving to play.
The way the bubbles work isn't engaging either. There are no satisfying chain reactions or combos; the puzzling is basic, and feels like Space Invaders with colour-matching. It has the frustration element in place, but not the addictive quality that makes you want to keep playing.
And the production values are awful. The whole game feels like a cross between a cheesy European pop video and an early '90s Amiga tech demo. Super Bubble Pop is as hectic as any puzzle game you care to mention, and the two-player mode offers some entertainment, but ultimately you can't shake the feeling that it's just puzzling by numbers.
SUPER MONKEY BALL DELUXE
Deliriously happy visuals, spot-on comedy sounds, and a hefty dose of Japanese mentalism. Incredible fun
Screenshots - Party - Issue 41 (April 2005) - 8.6/10
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SE05602E)
Monkey.txtRead Review
Screenshots:
Jumping into a cold vat of melted ice lollies on a hot summer's day. No, that's not it... Getting a head massage from a yodelling koala while fluffy kittens tickle your feet with their little paws. Nope, still not there... Okay, how about dancing naked through a field of wispy grass while the clouds wink at you and the sun warms your bare arse?
Actually, forget it. We're trying to put the unbelievably happy yet undeniably weird feeling that Super Monkey Ball Deluxe gives you into words, and we can't. Since SMBD is such a simple game, let's put it in simple terms: it's monkeys in balls, and it's super. Oh, and it's deluxe too.
Super because the gameplay is straight from God's own big box of fun, and deluxe because us lucky Xbox owners get all the content from Super Monkey Ball 1 and 2 on GameCube, with some extra goodies chucked in on top. Yup, this is a compilation of two old 'Cube games, but don't let that put you off - it's banana-flavoured genius.
But before we start crunching numbers, let's talk about how Super Monkey Ball Deluxe actually works. Using the analogue stick, you tilt the stage so that your Monkey Ball rolls in the direction you want it to go. Get it to the Goal and you've completed the stage, and any bananas you collect along the way give you points. Fall off the stage or run out of time, and you've failed. It really is that simple.
This is the game analogue sticks were designed for - every tiny tweak elicits a teeter or a totter, and energetic prods send your simian spinning off with sparks flying. For the first 20 or so levels it's more enjoyable than petting puppies, and happier than a meerkat on stilts.
Then it gets tough. It's still fun and addictive, but now it's more like picking a scab, or tonguing a mouth ulcer - painful, but you just can't help it. Soon stages are ridiculously, unbearably, joypad-breakingly hard. It's the type of difficulty that makes you squint your eyes and lick your lips until they're dryer than a sandy flip-flop. Happily, though, you'll want to keep playing until you finally nail that dastardly stage. Just one more go. Just. One. More. Go. Suddenly it's 4am.
And there are plenty of stages to beat. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe drags 114 from the first game and 140 from the second, then bungs in more than 50 monkey-spanking new stages on top. Once you've ploughed through the main game you can also take on the new Ultimate mode, which orders every single stage in ascending order of difficulty. It's a huge challenge, and multiplayer mini-games add some awesome variety.
Okay, so it doesn't offer the same thrills as a Halo 2 plasma sword killing spree on Xbox Live, and it's essentially a Greatest Hits collection of two old GameCube games, but Super Monkey Ball Deluxe is so stuffed full of sunshine, rainbows and happiness that we don't care. If you fancy some simple, addictive, straightforward gameplay fun, you'd be monkey mad not to peel this banana of crazy genius.
SUPERLEAGUE RUGBY LEAGUE
An appalling mess: dreadful animation, uncontrollable players, few teams, last-gen physics
Sports - Issue 31 (July 2004) - 3.3/10
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HE00102E)
Superleague.txtRead Review
Oh dear. This is nasty. If you're Australasian and have problems with co-ordination, there's the remotest possibility you'd enjoy this. Then again, if you're Australasian and have difficulty putting one foot in front of the other, there's very little chance you'd have made it to the UK in the first place to sample this, um, 'sample'. Oh, what an apt word.
Superleague Rugby League is a colossal muddle of a game, a bedraggled floater that meanders between awful and just plain unplayable, a factor that isn't helped by the exclusion of every team except the Aussie Superleague. It's a little like FIFA releasing an entirely exclusive game based on the escapades of a Poundland-sponsored Sunday league.
But the narrow appeal of Superleague Rugby League is narrowed further by the sheer incompetence of the control system and engine.
As with the majority of sports titles, the player you control is indicated by an icon of some sort, in this case, a circle that follows you around. Unlike most sports games, the idea of controlling a player is little more than wishful thinking. Your man moves and slides around like he's on ice, often sliding left on a wave of blissfully ignorant inertia while you've spent the past ten or 15 seconds trying to send him in a different direction. Finally get him to go where you wanted and he'll now glide off on that course for another eon with his head up his arse, unaware that you'll soon need him to go somewhere else. These are the good times. At points the control system seemingly just stops altogether, leaving you pirouetting on the spot like a musical box ballerina.
To further add to the illogical shambles, the camera is set so far from the pitch it's like trying to control a match from the cockpit of a Boeing 737. When something remotely interesting happens, the camera reacts with such apoplexy and frenzy you can almost feel your television juddering off the table. Everything wobbles, shifts, and jolts, leaving you stunned like a freshly clobbered fish and open to attack. You'll lose the ball for sure, and if you do manage to regain it don't expect any help from your AI-free team. They'll be stood rigid like sculptures, often walking through each other or j-j-juddering on the spot like man-size sex toys. And let's not dare tread the path regarding the crowd animation, but suffice to say the words 'Dawn of the Dead' spring to mind.
Superleague Rugby League is an exercise in pointlessness, a game weak in content and laboured in execution. It makes you wonder just how something so painfully atrocious was ever given the go ahead. Are the Aussies purposely giving us fuel to fire at them? First the World Cup, now this.
SUPERMAN: THE MAN OF STEEL
Boring levels, rubbish combat, and a dreadful control system
Shooter - Issue 12 (January 2003) - 3.0/10
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IG02204E)
Superman.txtRead Review
Videogames and superheroes are like salt and vinegar - a natural complement to each other. After all, what better way is there to extend the existing universe of popular fantasy characters than by making them interactive, rather than just reading about them in a comic or watching their exploits on the big screen? And besides, the fan of a superhero is also most likely to be a fan of games, so it's a natural double-header and everyone's a winner baby - especially the sales and marketing guys salivating to the sound of cash registers going ka-ching!
Well, in theory that works. Except when you take the most famous hero of the bunch and place him in a game suffering from such poor execution you'd think it was the victim of a firing squad shooting blanks.
As the Man of Steel your job is to save humanity (and in particular Metropolis) from the likes of Brainiac 13, Metallo, Bizarro and their armies of flying minions. The villains plan to rob secret futuristic technology from the city and use it to their own ends to cause all manner of nasty shenanigans.
In classic deceptively 'rubbish game' fashion, Superman doesn't immediately look like a complete waste of time and money. Upon loading the game and choosing the only available option of Story mode you're presented with half-decent cutscenes before arriving in a sprawling - and it has to be said, good-looking - 3D cityscape that makes a decent first impression.
The illusion of quality still remains as you sweep down amongst the skyscrapers in between floating cars and land on the road below. But as soon as you set off on your first missions the symptoms of a game in terminal decline begin to make themselves known.
The gameplay consists of a continual series of aerial combat sequences or time-based rescue/fire-fighting operations. On the combat side, much of your time is taken up with eliminating flying robots or other suitable baddies. As Superman, you would consider yourself to be very capable of dealing with metal menaces and indeed you're blessed with heat vision, freezing breath, a big punch and telescopic x-ray vision.
But the first obstacle is that many of your enemies are colour coded, meaning you're limited as to which method you use to deal with them. A purple target means you have to use your heat vision, yellow means you need to punch them out.
It's a terrible way to depict superhero combat, forcing the player to relinquish virtually all control and engage in a tedious exercise of colour-coded button-bashing.
And then there are the handling issues. Superman is supposed to be as fast as a speeding bullet, but he handles like a rusty Reliant Robin - sluggish, unresponsive and generally a chore to control.
Flying in a straight line is easy enough, but try and do a sharp turn and you'll find out that you just can't. The Man of Steel handles like he's built of the stuff - especially when so many missions involve poorly displayed objectives that need to be accomplished in a short timeframe. You'll end up turning the air as blue as Superman's leotard when he once again ploughs headfirst into the side of a burning building rather than quickly extinguishing the flames on the other side.
With the fatally flawed combat system, terrible handling and ultra-repetitive missions, there really is very little to say in support of this title. Even the reasonably impressive Metropolis backdrop lets itself down by being surrounded by invisible walls forcing you to return to the predetermined mission path. And there are no pedestrians to be found anywhere in this supposedly sprawling urban dwelling.
Thanks to the poor gameplay, you're left feeling that at no time throughout the "adventure" are you fully in control of a superhero with special abilities, and surely that's the whole point of a game with 'Superman' in its title?
Circus Freak Studios has done the Yuletide bit by serving up one of the biggest turkeys of the festive season. Make sure you avoid this title and you'll have yourselves a much merrier Christmas.
SWAT: GLOBAL STRIKE TEAM
An accomplished FPS with realistic graphics and arcade action
Squad-based shooter - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 7.7/10
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SWAT.txtRead Review
To use an old cliche, videogames are a lot like buses. In this instance, you wait for ages for an involving FPS with voice-activated commands to come along, then two arrive at once. And while the release of Rainbow Six 3 was accompanied by a flashbang of hype and anticipation, SWAT used stealthy tactics to slip relatively unnoticed into our office.
TAC-3 (Commander Kincaid, sharpshooter Lt Lee and Tech expert Lt Jackson) are an elite unit of the LA SWAT division, and are leased out to resolve global terrorist situations. Take in various locations around the world, such as Russian Power Facilities, LA banks and London Tube stations as you strive to thwart the exploits of the Dragon and Omega gangs - an international drug cartel and all-round bad guys to boot.
There's no 'I' in 'team' - you'll need to use each member effectively to accomplish tasks throughout all 21 missions. Issue a wide range of orders via the D-pad or, impressively, the Voice Communicator, including "Breach door", "Secure area", "Defuse bomb" and "Use control panel".
While not quite pot-smoking hippies, these peace-loving guys prefer to use non-lethal force to neutralise enemy threats. Missions are graded on several performance criteria, including melee attacks, peaceful restraints and hostages rescued. The better the rating, the more upgrade points you'll earn, enabling you to customise your weapons, resulting in some ferocious firepower. And so begins a novel spin on an otherwise run of the mill shoot 'em up, where rather than blasting through the entire level, it's in your best interest to take your time and subdue opponents rather than kill them. Wounded enemies can be cuffed and restrained, while others will surrender when they feel threatened, or are ordered to. Rules of engagement state that you may only fire when fired upon, and any use of unnecessary force will significantly harm your performance rating. This greatly increases replay value, as you'll want to get every medal in every mission.
Add a Time Attack mode, two-player co-op and four-player Deathmatch modes, and SWAT proves a reasonably well-rounded shooter. Reasonably, because the inclusion of Xbox Live play would have taken this title from good to great. Downloadable maps and uploadable scores are offered, and are some consolation. It's a pity that players can't jump between squad members during levels, and can only use them at certain points predetermined by the game. There are always going to be comparisons between this title and Rainbow Six 3, and unfortunately for the former, the Rainbow boys swat this clean out of the air.
SX SUPERSTAR
Formulaic average-looking racer with a few aesthetic pleasantries
Extreme sports - Issue 19 (August 2003) - 6.6/10
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SX.txtRead Review
Now you would have thought after the success of MotoGP 2 (Issue 17, 9.4) and the Burnout-on-bikes Speed Kings (Issue 18, 8.0) that there's nothing Climax couldn't do with two wheels. Sadly, this arcade fantasy racer may well prove to be the fly in the ointment.
The two main game modes consist of the fairly unstructured Arcade and the far more interesting cheeseathon Championship. In Championship mode, you can choose from a multitude of international riders, all of whom are fairly nondescript since SX Superstar avoids all things corporate, including official licences. Characters, bikes, sponsors and tracks are all firmly tongue in cheek.
Starting off in a ramshackle apartment not unlike a student hovel, your main aim in SX is to rise from Amateur status through to Pro while making as much cash as possible, dodging stalkers and dumping your girlfriend every time you win a race (just like real life... or so says Climax). Thankfully it's all done over an answer machine so there's none of that nasty silent discussion stuff that goes on in real relationships.
Races themselves take place over five countries in three types of area. There are arenas - one per country - which are essentially track-based dirt bowls with jumps, obstacles and nice little country enhancements like bombing it around the Coliseum in Italy or through the pyramids in Egypt. Baja stages are off-road sections, which are again country specific and expand the game's appeal further as shortcuts, hidden jumps and changes in layout differ depending on the difficulty level. And lastly there are 'special' optional races which consist of trick contests, uphill races and even a Microlite challenge, which imaginatively involves chasing a plane around a mountain.
When it comes to gameplay, don't expect rocket science in terms of bike dynamics or rival AI. It's arcade all the way and if you're looking forward to Colin McRae depth you're going to be disappointed. As you progress through the levels, upgrading bikes becomes essential. In each class you begin with a basic 'Tiny Tim' from 125cc in Amateur, 250cc Semi-pro and 500cc for Pro. Sadly the only noticeable sensation that differs with the bikes is a negligible increase in speed.
Handling is painfully simplistic once you have got to grips with powersliding through corners by feathering the Right trigger and realised that landing the machine upright when returning back to Earth after a 300 metre cliff jump is fairly important. From here on in, winning races and titles is a mere formality and not because of pure gaming ability which, for those with a short attention span, may be fun but in reality is never a good thing.
The biggest crime committed by SX is the ludicrously stupid actions of the other riders. With skills more akin to Mr Bean than Ricky Carmichael, it's not unusual for four out of six Pro riders to fall more than once in a five-lap race, often leaving their skidding bikes to act as an obstacle, taking other competitors along for the ride. This factor alone induces a heavy dose of catch-up which in turn takes the title's unrealistic attributes to dangerously daft heights.
It's not all bad news, as the game does have its niceties. The 24 tricks that can be pulled off in the now-standard 'Tricks=Points=Nitro' gauge are done with flair, adding a little spice to races, and can come in useful when overtaking on straights. The water and dirt particle displacement isn't too shabby either. This said, it isn't quite enough to save SX Superstar from banishment to bargain basements in the near future. It's one of those generic 'seen it all before' titles, when both on paper and with the heavyweight backing of Climax it could have, should have, been so much better.
SYBERIA II
Well presented, but sometimes irksome and lacking the quality and depth of its predecessor
RPG - Issue 38 (January 2005) - 6.0/10
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MI00801W)
Syberia.txtRead Review
As adventure games go, Syberia II is hardly groundbreaking. Almost identical in look and feel to its excellent PC/PS2 predecessor, it picks up the story of New York lawyer Kate Walker (that's you by the way) and the stereotypically eccentric shock-haired inventor Hans Voralberg, who's looking for the mystical woolly mammoth-inhabited island of Syberia which, he claims, is somewhere north of Russia.
Hoping desperately that the old loon isn't just suffering from a chronic bout of senile dementia, you set off by train to help him look for this so-called glacial paradise, stopping off at a series of rather isolated and often slightly sinister locations along the way.
Each area is packed full of brain-teasing puzzles. These usually charge you with wandering around, interacting with colourful though badly acted characters and finding objects - some of which are harder to track down than a virgin porn star - that can be used to solve each problem.
Sadly, the quality of the puzzles falls well short of the first game's superbly crafted conundrums, with many feeling rather arbitrary and subsequently too detached from the main thrust of the story.
The plot also fails to impress, and never manages to reach the magical heights of Syberia's captivating yarn, at times feeling like a poor man's Tim Burton movie on acid. However, there's still just about enough quality shining through to make you want to push onto the next part of the game.
Syberia II teems with fairly attractive and intelligently imagined locales, though taking in the sights is made unnecessarily clumsy thanks to some hideously unresponsive controls and ludicrous movement restrictions. Kate might be able to tell you what a Deposition is, but ask her to walk over a tree root and she'll display the intelligence of a professional halfwit. Who dropped out of school. When they were six.
Ultimately, this is the type of game that'll probably only appeal to a select few. If you're after a slow-paced, puzzle-packed experience with a half-decent story and plenty of characters with which to converse and interact, then Syberia II is just about worth a look, especially if you've played its superior predecessor and want to know how the story ends. But if you prefer more bang for your buck, then we suggest sticking with Halo 2 (Issue 36, 10.0), Star Wars KOTOR II (Issue 37, 9.3) and reputable Dutch brothels instead.
TAK 2: THE STAFF OF DREAMS
A great little Xbox debut. The main game's littered with fun puzzles, while there's a ton of great challenges to boot
Screenshots - Platformer - Issue 41 (April 2005) - 7.0/10
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Tak2.txtRead Review
Screenshots:
We'd be dreaming if we said Tak 2 was a groundbreaking platforming masterpiece, but this is actually a very polished and enjoyable romp. Nicely rendered cutscenes progress the typically nonsensical story, though the overall presentation and charm more than make up for the tale.
Tak leaps around each well-designed and retina-scorching environment with intuitive ease, though there's no option to alter the tricky, horizontally and vertically inverted controls. Each level involves many engaging puzzles, but none are ever taxing on the grey matter. Collecting the right ingredients, when prompted, allows you to summon JuJu spirits to aid your quest. More impressively, concocting different JuJu potions unlocks additional mini-games for the Dinky games section, including snowboard races and Phoenix Fights. Brimming with nice touches, this is a solid platformer for more than just kids.
TAK: THE GREAT JUJU CHALLENGE
The scrawny Pupanunu boy and his stick return for more costume-wearing jungle-based antics
Action - Issue 53 (March 2006) - 6.8/10
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takjuju.txtRead Review
Tak is a hero now. He has defeated evil and saved the land. You would think he'd relax a bit, abuse his hero status and make fit Pupanunu girls fan him with giant leaves and feed him grapes. But no. He clearly is as much of a dork as he looks.
There's no arch nemesis for Tak to hit with his little stick anymore. So Tak enters the Juju Challenge, in which he has to go up against the best warriors of other tribes to complete a series of obstacle courses and puzzles within a time limit. These obstacle courses basically translate as large platform-filled levels, rather like the ones in Tak 2 (Issue 41, 7.1). Nothing out of the ordinary, then.
But wait - the difference this time around is that Tak isn't working alone. He teams up with the half-wit hero, Lok, who tags along every step of the way. Surprise, surprise: both characters have differing abilities, making for the need to swap control from one to the other in order to get through the 'all-new' co-op obstacles. The thing is we can't decide whether this makes the game more enjoyable, or just a hell of a lot more tedious.
Lok is bigger and stronger, so he's better for bits where you need to lift stuff, like explosive barrels. He can also pick up and throw Tak to higher platforms. Right, that makes sense. But Lok can't swim because he's... scared of fish? That's funny, but lame. So you use Tak to swim (who's smaller and would be more vulnerable to aquatic predators). But Tak can't climb vine-covered walls. WHY THE HELL NOT? He's a little bush-boy. He looks like he's Mowgli's cousin. Mowgli can climb like a monkey ninja. We've seen him do it on the telly. So you have to use Lok, who we'd have billed as the heavier, less agile character. Having to swap for basic things like swimming, climbing and jumping high is a pain in the ass. Not fun.
The co-op aspect is used to better effect on other occasions. You walk into a room with a series of platforms, but they're too far apart to jump across. You discover some switches that raise stepping stones between them. The idea is that you leave one character to press the switches, while the other jumps across the stones to the far side. As we did all this, we asked ourselves: is this fun? It's not bad in two-player split-screen co-op, where each player takes half the strain. It can be done quicker that way. But it's not as cool as the animal puzzles that have always been in Tak games since the beginning of the franchise.
Oh well. At least you get to dress in that wicked chicken suit again, and a new lobster suit, too. The cut-scenes made us laugh, too. Lok is a total buffoon and he'll crack you up. But he doesn't make this more than another average, slightly tedious platformer.
TAO FENG: FIST OF THE LOTUS
Highly enjoyable, frenzied and fun. Lovely arenas to trample
Beat 'em up - Issue 16 (May 2003) - 8.2/10
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Tao.txtRead Review
This really is a game of two halves. A pair of warring factions are vying for control of a sacred artefact, which makes for a messy business considering that each one possesses a single half of the thing, and is desperate to get its paws on the other, bringing the whole thing together. It's a supremely powerful object, so the factions - Pale Lotus and Dark Mantis - despite sounding like a Chinese set menu for two, are locked in brutal combat for possession of it. Nasty combat, too, the kind that's not afraid to use its nails, leave teeth marks all over your bum cheeks and play havoc with the upholstery.
So, there you have it. Twelve combatants, comprised of six from each faction, battling it out in typical beat 'em up fashion. Each button corresponds to a limb, with the R trigger allowing for some nifty extra manoeuvres. The battles take place in detailed arenas that feature oodles of breakables, which probably pushes the insurance premiums sky high. But that's all just preliminary ceremony to bring you up to speed - with all that polite bowing out of the way, we can get on to the fight proper.
So, what is there to separate the game from its Xbox dojo-mates, namely Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance (Issue 13, 7.8) and Dead Or Alive 3 (Issue 01, 8.5)? Firstly, it's a bit more furious than any other beat 'em up around. Everything in the game can be ruined. Not only can you trash the fighting arenas in a variety of ways - furniture splinters convincingly and the floor shatters like a bar of Caramac dropped from the Eiffel Tower - but you can also dole out some serious GBH to your opponent. As the battle wages over three rounds, dark bruises form on faces, mouths trickle with blood, clothes tear and scuffle and, generally, by the end of the match the loser will look like they've gone 12 rounds with an abattoir, and lost. Fighters haven't looked this bruised and battered since Rocky. There's a nice level of detail that helps to make the fights feel like true battles, as opposed to just clinical meetings of fists and feet.
Not only that, but it's actually possible to shatter the limbs of your opponent by raining down blows on them when they block. Not only does it sound plausible, but it's a great idea that encourages people to take the initiative and get stuck in. No cheesy perma-blocking here, not unless you want one of your arms flapping uselessly by your side like an old sock.
There's a bunch of other cool ideas, too. When you're backed up against a wall, you can use it to launch a particularly vicious attack, so getting cornered by a button basher isn't much of a worry. Add that to the ability to spin and leap off the scenery, and your position in the arena suddenly becomes as strategic as it's ever been. And boy, do those arenas look sweet. Bathed in a solar flare's worth of lighting effects and heat hazes, along with slick reflections and the pitter-patter of falling rain, it looks the business. The characters aren't slouches, either. They don't, however, move that gracefully, which make the fights feel a little messy and clunky at times.
Just for the record, as far as video game boobs go, this one's got the best. They jiggle in just the right places. Take that, DOA Xtreme Beach Volleyball (Issue 14, 8.0). Ahem. Anyway, just for the record, like.
Ignore the crass Americanism in the form of some cheesy dialogue and miserable character design, and you're in for a frantic beat 'em up that will allow you to tear up the joint in more ways than one. In terms of quality, it falls neatly between DOA3 and Mortal Kombat, and makes for one of the most involving and action-packed fighting experiences around.
This is highly enjoyable scrapper fare, and not a duff duffer with any obvious flaws. It's not the best beat 'em up on Xbox, as it's pipped for that accolade by Tecmo's finest, but it's an extremely worthy contender for your time. It's solid, detailed, swift and bundles of fun that, like trapped wind, is even better when shared with a friend.
TAITO LEGENDS 2
The supreme classics collection makes a not-quite-so-legendary return
Arcade - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 6.5/10
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taito2.txtRead Review
You know what it's like. You eat all the good chocolates first, and are left with a collection you could pick your way through eventually but you're never going to do it in one go. Then you realise there's a whole new tray of chocs underneath and you gorge out on that one as well. Well, that's Taito Legends 2 summed up in a big chocolatey metaphor, even if the latest collection isn't quite as mouthwatering as the last.
Taito Legends 2 has far more Rainbow Island- and Bubble Bobble-inspired games than the previous collection, with the likes of Insector X, Fairyland Story and erm, Liquid Kids - all rare treats that we might not remember, but will instantly like all the same. We're just not sure about the weird names, though. Still, they were more innocent times, weren't they?
Taking its lead from the previous collection, Taito Legends 2 is another well-balanced chest of treats, tempering odd Japanese creations with some good old hack 'n' slash and space shooters. The likes of Growl and the amusingly named Violence Fight are right up there for a little short-term burst of action, while the classic Darius Gaiden makes a return to the land of the living as well. Get in!
We like the new inclusion of longer-lasting Taito games this time around as well, and this will undoubtedly prolong the retro experience. A little touch of Dungeon Magic and Arabian Magic are great examples of how RPGs began, and as simple as they are, it'll prove a hard heart that isn't melted by them even if, like the majority of the games in here, you've never actually heard of them before.
Space Invaders buffs will be going a bit mental too with three versions included here, and while some people may ask whether that many are actually needed, let's not forget this package includes a further 30-odd titles to tinker around with. But one question remains that we hope will be addressed for the final line-up - Taito, didn't we beg, didn't we plead, didn't we cry out for the third part of the Bubble Bobble trilogy, Parasol Stars? Why no include? Why? Bad Taito.
That said, cast your eye over this complete list of games and see how many you can remember without Googling them. Some are classics, some are obscure and long forgotten, but playing them is like rediscovering an alternative universe where Rainbow Islands became a side-scrolling shooter, and Bubble Bobble was actually about dwarves. Honestly, we're not lying. Not as good as the original by any stretch, but for another wide-ranging box of retro goodness, and a hefty collection of new titles, Taito is still the last word in retro titles.
TAZ: WANTED
Swish cartoon graphics, but confusing and frustrating gameplay
Platformer - Issue 8 (October 2002) - 5.9/10
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IG01302E)
Taz.txtRead Review
Starting life as an occasional bit-part character in Warner Bros. cartoons, Taz now has his own series featuring lots of atrocious Australian accents and much raspberry-blowing, as well as a number of video game starring roles under his furry belly.
Taz: Wanted is based around Taz's main abilities - spinning and eating - but it isn't just standard platform guff. Instead, there are a number of 'Wanted' posters featuring Taz's face that he's got to destroy. Bonus objectives of destroying scenery and collecting sandwiches are there so you can earn extra cash.
So it's not just a walk-in-a-straight-line-and-jump-on-people's-heads game; there's lots of exploring to be done, and lots of trial and error involved in figuring out how to reach and destroy each poster. This stops it being a simple, light-hearted game for kids and turns it into something that takes a lot of time and effort to work through.
There's lots of going back on yourself, lots of frustrated looking at high platforms and wondering how on earth you're going to reach them, and lots (and we mean lots) of dying.
Thankfully, there's also no limit on the lives you can lose, or any life system at all. If Taz sinks in water, he's reinstated on the nearest shore. If an enemy attacks him, he'll get punched in the face repeatedly until he runs away. If he gets caught by a zookeeper, he restarts from a cage $500 worse off. This means that you only leave a level when you finish it or admit defeat for the day and quit. It also means you need to get used to constantly being placed somewhere else in the level when you're just trying to go about your own business.
It's a tricky game with confusing stages, lots of wandering around, some completely and utterly illogical puzzles, fiddly jumping and a frustratingly large number of 'deaths'.
But it really does look lovely, and there's enough stuff packed into each stage to give hardened gamers a fun 'collect 100 per cent of everything' challenge. The bonus two-player games (racing, smashing stuff up, time trials) are an okay way of spending half an hour, too.
But with gameplay as clumsy and awkward as this, it's impossible to recommend to kids or anyone else looking for some cartoony fun.
TD OVERDRIVE
Bad handling makes this depressing
Driving - Issue 4 (June 2002) - 3.8/10
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TD.txtRead Review
Travel the world competing in different kinds of races around San Francisco, Toyko and London! No, it's not Project Gotham Racing (Issue 01, 8.9) although the cities are the same. Blaze along at high speeds, weaving in and out of everyday traffic! No, it's not Burnout.
This is TD Overdrive, and any similarities it has with those two games are entirely overwhelmed by the fact that this one is rubbish.
The 'twist' here is the 'Underground' mode which puts you in the shadowy world of illegal street racing. A nice idea, but one executed in spectacularly poor fashion.
The graphics deserve a special mention for their amazing shoddiness. Vehicles blink in and out of existence, as do whole buildings. In-car view is just normal view with your car removed. Driving's no fun either. Cars won't power slide, traffic deliberately gets in your way and you can get stuck inside rocks.
On another console, at another time, TD Overdrive would be an acceptably average racing game. On Xbox, with Gotham and Burnout around, this is just depressing.
TECMO CLASSIC ARCADE
A small, workmanlike collection that includes one or two genuine classics. Okay, but there's better out there
Arcade - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 6.1/10
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Tecmo.txtRead Review
The neverending project to ruin your rose-tinted memories continues in this 11-strong showing of bleeping, flashing titles of the last century. This time it's the turn of Tecmo, with some typical offerings ranging from the surprisingly-still-quite-good, to the utterly forgettable, in that you forgot them first time round, to games so old they were probably invented by the Ancient Egyptian priests of the sun god Ra.
Stand-out moments are fiddly, likeable block-push platformer Solomon's Key, brainless but still quite fun left-to-right kill 'em up Rygar, and the nicely pitched Pac-Man-ish idiocy of Bomb Jack, still a joy to play. What with the ratio of good-to-awful-dross in most retro collections these days standing at about 1:4 Tecmo's done alright, with the only real stinkers being the incomprehensible (even if you 'get' US football) Tecmo Bowl, the pointless Pinball Action, and the just really, really ancient Swimmer and Pleiads, which are so old they defy classification. Filling out the middle are alright-ish 1990s shmups Star Force and Strato Fighter (basically an R-Type rip-off), clunky football game Tecmo Cup (which only Mark really enjoyed), and Senjyo, which looks a bit like Battlezone but is nowhere near as good. Ho hum.
As ever, it's a case of 20 minutes of quick-fire fun at best, another lesson in how games from the past should just stay there at worst. And with the similarly priced Taito Legends containing over 30 consistently better titles, this is a paltry collection, especially so given the notable absence of Ninja Gaiden and Silk Worm. You'll like it if you like this sort of thing(tm), but then you probably already own them all in cabinet form if that's the case.
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES
A decent button-bashing beat 'em up. Very repetitive, but two-player co-op mode is fun
Action - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 6.3/10
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Teenage.txtRead Review
Heroes in a half shell, Turtle Power! Hugely popular cartoons, such as Transformers and He-Man, and their over-priced action figures were all the rage in the '80s, and rising from the toxic ashes of this craze came the phenomenally successful Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Four escaped baby turtles that found their way into the sewers, swam through some radioactive ooze, then met an equally mutated rat who instructed them in the ways of the ninja so they could avenge the death of his former master who died at the hands of arch enemy Shredder. Kids will swallow anything, eh?
If you enjoyed the Turtles arcade game back in the early '90s, you'll be relieved to see that TMNT is pretty much the exact same deal. You don't get too many cel-shaded, side-scrolling beat 'em ups on Xbox, but TMNT holds its bandana-clad head high to shun any thought-provoking gameplay in exchange for good old-fashioned mindless action. Simply pop this in the tray and switch your brain off for a couple of hours. After a lengthy cutscene intro (just like an episode of the TV show), it's straight into some slicing 'n' dicing. Story mode follows one of the four Turtles (each with an individual opener) as players work their way through the invisible-walled, railed stages in pursuit of the elusive Shredder. Each character - Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael and Michelangelo - has their own distinctive colour, weapons, attributes and fighting moves. Attacks are carried out via A, X and the Right trigger, though more often than not you'll just utilise the quick attacks (A) due to the large number of enemies involved at any one time, as the slower (albeit more powerful) moves leave you particularly vulnerable.
After hacking your way through wave after wave of generic bad guys (men with clubs, harder men with clubs, robots and harder robots, which bizarrely materialise from the ground), in true arcade fashion you'll face a boss at the end of each stage, usually comprising of a big hard man or big hard robot. The action is accompanied by comic book-style onomatopoeic sound effects, but as well as looking like an episode of the original Batman, they sometimes get in the way of - and detract from - the fighting. Additional items, such as shuriken throwing stars and health replenishment (junk food) are collected by smashing those discarded crates which seem to litter every beat 'em up out there.
Because of the limited gameplay, repetition sets in early, and the unimaginative level design makes it feel like you're playing the same stage over and over again with different backdrops. Some relief is provided in Versus mode, where you can battle a CPU or human opponent turtle one on one, but the very limited moves make this a dull and uninvolving experience. And while we're on the subject of multiplayer, what the hell happened to the four-way fun of the arcade game? I haven't had as much fun with three mates since the time a group of us spent all afternoon (and £2 each) finishing the coin-op. Criminally, TMNT only allows two players to work through the game co-op.
Other irritants, like the way exploding barrels do minimal damage to enemies but wipe out more than half of your health, or the fact that you can only save whole levels and not individual stages (forcing numerous, irritating level replays), don't help either. Plus, in an age when a moveable camera is expected in games, frustration is compounded by its distinct absence. But TMNT isn't a total failure, as it does exactly what it sets out to do - namely be a fun beat 'em up that requires absolutely no thought whatsoever. However, gamers over 12 years of age and those who enjoy a bit of a challenge shouldn't really come looking here. For them, Turtle Power is like, so last decade, dude.
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES 2: BATTLENEXUS
Four-way co-op and branching story make this marginally more than just a sequel, but it's still button-bashing
Action - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 6.4/10
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Turtles2.txtRead Review
Flushing turtles down the toilet, just like producing average beat 'em up adaptations, doesn't get rid of heroes in a half shell; they come back stronger. This is good news for flippered fans, because BattleNexus fills in what was missing from the last Xbox Turtles title (Issue 28, 6.3).
The same excitable cutscenes that advance the storyline return, along with the cel-shaded graphics, albeit with a nifty polish. The biggest improvement is the ability to now play with all four characters simultaneously as opposed to the first game's two-player monotony. Four-way co-op is infinitely more enjoyable and harks back to the fun of the arcade original. Which is, brilliantly, an unlockable extra.
Another top touch is the ability to cycle through each turtle at any point. Players must use each character during certain situations to solve puzzles or defeat specific enemies. While not massively expanding gameplay, this does offer limited variation through the otherwise tepid and railed environments. Limited we say, because unfortunately the similar enemies make for some very repetitive hacking 'n' slashing. Replayability is another factor, with players able to pick their way through the branching story and retry any unlocked area with a different turtle to get maximum point ratings and unlock the goodies. However, monotony may soon set in after the third time through the same finger-burning level.
Controls are pleasingly simple, but the camera will often confusingly zoom in and out of the action at random, and can't be rotated either. Factor in the beat 'em up style BattleNexus and Turtles 2 makes for a slight improvement on the original game.
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES 3: MUTANT NIGHTMARE
The turtles are back once more with this formulaic four-player brawler
Beat 'em up - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 5.6/10
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tmnt3.txtRead Review
There's something almost comforting in the fact that, even after all these years, the Turtles are still kicking about on telly. Kids today might have progressed from simple games of footy in the park to full-scale happy slapping riots, but at least they can still enjoy the adventures of four psychotic, mutant amphibians in the comfort of their own home.
That might be great for anybody with nostalgic yearnings for mutagenic terrapins and ancient Japanese instruments of death, but it doesn't excuse the fact that the Ninja Turtles games remain squarely rooted in the past as well. Mutant Nightmare, the third Turtles game on Xbox, plays almost identically to the previous two and, bar the obvious graphical differences, doesn't stray too far from the four-play arcade template of 15 years ago.
That means cartoon scrolling beat 'em up from start to finish - in this case, a staggering 60 levels' worth spread across three separate episodes, interspersed with footage from the latest cartoons. There are some tweaks to the age-old format - a couple of basic shooting gallery sequences, characters can earn experience that can be spent on new moves and abilities, and some levels have a more free-roaming aspect to them - but for the most part this is depressingly predictable stuff.
On the plus side, there's plenty to get through, with combat areas and challenges opening up beyond the 60 story missions, and the difficulty has been ramped up to match the Turtles' new 'tough' image. But will you want to stick it out when the gameplay is so unsurprising and repetitive?
TENCHU: RETURN FROM DARKNESS
Will suck you in like a black hole. A slow-burning beauty you'd be mad to overlook
Stealth action - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 8.4/10 - Xbox Live features **
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Tenchu.txtRead Review
Patience. If there is a single thing you must possess in order to appreciate Tenchu, it is patience. No number of throwing stars, blowpipes, or fancy-assed back flips will compensate you if you lack the fundamental capacity to sit still on long journeys and not take toilet breaks during movies. Wise man, he not fidget.
And that, for as long as it has been in existence, is the whole point of Tenchu. It's about choosing your moves wisely and about jumping on opportunities when you get the chance. You must be still, you must strike from the darkness and, without wanting to sound like a Carry On movie, you must, ahem, 'do people from behind'. Learn these principles and you'll be chortling quietly to yourself (remember, wise man not guffaw loudly over vanquished foe in case he spotted and strung up by goolies.)
Return From Darkness is essentially a beefed-up Wrath Of Heaven (PS2), only with spangly Xbox knobs on. There are a couple of extra single-player levels thrown in as tasty exclusives, along with a great multiplayer option and Xbox Live capabilities, but if you already own Wrath then differentiating the two comes down to the extras you get with Xbox. The visuals have only had a meagre spit 'n' polish applied, and you can easily spot hefty remnants of the old code lurking within the game. But, before you start contemplating falling on your own sword, this is far more than a straight port. The Xbox has added its own gruesome twist.
Like previous Tenchus, Return From Darkness strongly rewards the element of stealth, but carefully strikes a balance between snooping and neck slicing. There's a palpable feeling of anticipation as the game pad rumbles and you hear enemies drawing closer. The sense of dread before every kill is made even more tangible because no save points are included to rescue you if everything goes tits up and you find a length of sword rammed through your gut.
At first this seems like a huge mistake but that's far from the case. Being forced to retread a level allows you the chance to refine your technique. It allows you to improvise just as it allows you to learn enemy routines and behaviours. Whereas you were once skewered within minutes, with practice you'll eventually find yourself nimbly racing through a level, moving onto your next victim before the previous one has even hit the floor. It's exceptionally rewarding when you complete a level without even breaking a sweat or being seen, especially as punishment for mistakes has now been given more gravity.
Enemy AI, while not quite up to the level of, say, your average microwave, has certainly improved from Wrath. You will now be pursued if spotted, and enemies are intensely aggressive, calling for help if necessary, and even disarming your traps if you place them in too obvious a place. Complete a level littered with the swines and you'll want to pop your collar and strut down the street to Stayin' Alive. That's how cool you'll feel. And, almost as a footnote, if you really insist on continue points, check out the Easy option as this has now been added to the Xbox version - you big sissy.
The Live multiplayer option is also a bonus. You either go head to head, stalking and hunting down a real person with real tactics and real intelligence, or go co-op with them and use the headset to interact and track down other Live players.
A little more effort, which was clearly applied to ramping up the AI and gameplay, should have also been applied to the smaller touches. In an age where developers are striving to create true virtual realities, you can still be sprayed with blood from a gushing artery and not smear it along every wall and corner you creep round. You can leave bodies and entrails lying everywhere and still get nothing more than a mere shrug of the shoulders from the guard who finds them. It's little things like this that would have added even further depth to the game, which, in spite of minor niggles, is still a cracking good laugh.
There's something in Tenchu that you wouldn't even find in Splinter Cell. A raw, desperate gameplay that relies more on wits and luck than night vision and Codecs. It has something of the lioness about it. When you're teetering high on a ledge a few inches from your death, or genuinely and passionately fighting to stay alive after coming so far without saving, you just appreciate how much fun the series is. It may not have the graphical sheen of Sam Fisher's death dealing, nor does it have quite the following, but for sheer, brutal throat cutting and animal instinct you can't go far wrong. Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow exploded on Xbox with all the stealth of a car bomb, but true to form, it looks as though Tenchu is going to slip under the radar. Make sure this isn't the case. Turn on all the lights, send out the guards, and set loose the dogs. Like their countless victims, you'd be a fool to overlook Rikimaru, Ayame and chums.
TENNIS MASTERS SERIES 2003
Another tedious tennis title with almost nothing to recommend
Sports - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 3.0/10
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Tennis.txtRead Review
There are some amazing games on Xbox. You can fight convincing aliens in beautiful environments. You can scream around circuits in the best motorbiking game ever. You can warp time in a mind-bending platform game starring a cat with a clever Hoover.
One thing you can't do yet, though, is have an enjoyable, awesome game of tennis.
This peeves us somewhat, actually. We're all rather partial to a spot of Virtua Tennis 2 on Dreamcast and see no reason why the Xbox can't have a game of similar stature. That's because there is no reason.
The galling truth is that every tennis game to enter the workings of our beloved console has fallen short of this lofty ideal. In fact, Slam Tennis (Issue 06. 7.2) aside, they've been offensively bad. Pro Tennis WTA Tour (Issue 07, 1.9) and Fila World Tour Tennis (Issue 09, 2.6) are the games in question. A combined score of 4.5 tells the story of those two stinkers.
This month it's the turn of Tennis Masters Series 2003. How does it fit into the litany of tennis tragedy? Is it up there with Slam or down there with WTA? Well, the person standing nearby watching the game as it was reviewed just said this: "This is toilet, this game." Then he walked off.
That very professional judgement sums it all up very nicely. But why is this game "toilet"? Much the same reason as the other poor tennis games, really - the fact that it's just so frustratingly unresponsive.
Briefly tapping a direction on the Left thumbstick makes your player walk for a few paces in that direction, rather than just take one step. Once started, this movement animation can't be stopped, so you have to wait until your player has finished walking before you can give any further instruction.
If you were unfortunate enough to tap him in the wrong direction, you've no chance of returning the ball. This is rubbish.
Other crapness? Well, on the default setting, you can make your serve (with one button press; we never served a single fault all the time we played, never mind a double), then go and mow the lawn, have a shower, pump up your bicycle tyres, then go back to the game and make your next shot. Tennis isn't slow, but this game certainly is. This, too, is rubbish.
Still, the speed is something that can be rectified slightly by playing on Pro level or above - and if you have reactions faster than an anaesthetised sloth, you're a pro.
Being pro doesn't change the fact that players look like they're suffering from rickets. Their legs don't look right, even when waiting to receive a serve in a standing position. This too - you've guessed it - is rubbish.
One thing the game does have over its competitors is the range of shots you can play. You can put a decent amount of direction on your strokes, making rallies more strategic than the catastrophically stilted action of Pro WTA.
That is, of course, if a rally gets going. The different shots are markedly different, too, so there is a point to hitting a lob. But it doesn't change the fact you can't play a decent game of tennis. It's supposed to be a fast-paced sport, for goodness sake, you need to be able to move quickly and make decisions quickly. You can't with Tennis Masters, so what's the point?
We'll give you a clue - there is no point. We can't understand why no-one has managed to match Virtua Tennis 2 yet, and we suspect no-one will until the Sega folk themselves decide to crack their knuckles, sit at their development keyboard and deliver the third in the series.
It's a shame that we have to say such things, but the fact is you're currently a bit hamstrung if you want a top quality tennis title on your beloved Xbox. Slam Tennis is still the closest we've got.
Developers, take note. If you're making a tennis game that's not as least as good as ST, don't bother.
TERMINATOR 3: REDEMPTION
Solid shooter that's only let down by rudimentary presentation and frustrating driving levels
Action shooter - Issue 35 (November 2004) - 7.0/10
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T3Redemp.txtRead Review
If you believe in the law of diminishing returns, then the second movie tie-in from a very average film should be a big disappointment, right? Well, of sorts, though just like the desperate endo-skeleton at the end of the first Terminator movie, Redemption makes a damn good fight of it.
The futuristic action kicks off with a reprogrammed Arnie fighting for the human resistance against the mighty Skynet. And kick off it does, because Redemption allows Arnie to flex his mechanical muscles and indulge in some seriously slick fighting. The on-foot action is satisfyingly violent and hectic, making for a very entertaining third-person blaster. The auto lock-on function means charging through waves of Terminators and Skynet vehicles is a riot, so put your CPU-powered brain on hold for some great, thought-free blasting.
However, our unfeeling friend doesn't boast a hefty combo list for nothing, so get up close and personal with the murderous mechanoids and put the boot in. Or fist. Or any object that comes to hand in fact, because street signs and other assorted debris are all fair game to try and quell the rise of the machines, and it's brilliant fun smashing your way through the aluminium armies.
If you played our T3: Redemption demo way back in Issue 28, you'll know the game involves a fair bit of vehicular action, and here's where events really start to go off. Each mission usually requires some kind of pursuit, and one of your human allies will either rock up with a suitable vehicle, or public vehicles will be on hand to be 'commandeered' in Arnie's own inimitable way. The controls (the Left thumbstick moves and steers, whilst the Right thumbstick separately aims your weapon) are a bit tricky to get to grips with, and may feel alien to anyone familiar with the more intuitive controls of, say, Halo's Warthog.
The graphics may look a bit dated now, but at least the action never lets up for one second, and provides an absolutely mental, balls-out gaming experience. Tons of enemies and huge explosions are thrown at players at a breakneck pace, and really make for an exhilarating time. Trust us, using force is the only way to safely navigate the environments when bridges are collapsing, buildings are exploding and everyone's trying to kill you. Upgrade points are awarded for completing a mission within a set time limit too, again encouraging speedy, scintillating gameplay.
That said, the later, purely driving-based levels set in the present day do drag their impressive predecessors down a bit. Modern-day man's vehicles limp weakly behind the futuristic might of Skynet tanks, and feel slow and sluggish. Shortcuts are the only way to successfully chase down the fleeing T-X but, because of their obscure nature, victory is dependent on memorising an exact route after some very frustrating trial and error gameplay.
But don't get us wrong; T3 is full of neat little touches. Arnie's trademark 'Scan' vision is fully customisable, (charge time, damage infliction etc), and its kill-enhancing nature means you'll be spending more time in the red than Nick Leeson.
A solid shooter that's only let down by rudimentary presentation and frustrating driving levels, Redemption does go some way to redeeming the reputation of Terminator tie-ins.
TERMINATOR 3: RISE OF THE MACHINES
Stripped-down shooter that is accessible to everyone, but FPS purists may find it too easy
FPS - Issue 25 (January 2004) - 7.8/10
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Teminator3.txtRead Review
Movie licences on Xbox have ranged from the fantastic (Star Wars: KOTOR - Issue 20, 9.5 and Indiana Jones ATET - Issue 14, 9.0) to the utterly dire (Die Hard: Vendetta - Issue 19, 3.5 and Star Wars: Obi Wan - Issue 03, 3.3). Although the Terminator franchise fared quite well with Dawn of Fate (Issue 11, 7.0), it still wasn't the cracking game the licence deserves. And now we have the obligatory video game tie-in for the T3 movie that hit the big screens last summer. Well, Arnie did say he'd be back...
First impressions are very good, as stylish cutscenes depict the story so far. We begin in the future, where, unsurprisingly, Judgement Day has still happened and the human survivors continue to fight the machines. The rebels have captured a Skynet base and reprogrammed a Terminator - that'll be you - to help them fight their way out. It's clear from the outset this isn't a complex, die-hard FPS, but a very entertaining and accessible shooter that even casual gamers will be able to jump right into.
The controls are pretty standard shooter fare - look and move via the Right and Left thumbsticks respectively; fire with the Right trigger while a crucial lock-on function is maintained with the Left. The A button is the all-encompassing action button, while your weapon's secondary fire, peculiarly, is via the Black button. Levels are mostly based around unlock/rescue/evacuate missions, but in reality this takes a back seat to some seriously frantic action. Being the future and all, the developers have pretty much free licence to come up with all manner of outlandish weapons for you to use. You can cycle through them using Y and B, but, in a schoolboy error of an Etonian first year's standards, there's no function to jump straight to a specific weapon. Very frustrating, especially when you turn into a tight, enemy-packed corridor holding an empty SAM launcher, and need to scroll through five different weapons.
Following the story through the game, our metallic martyr battles first against Skynet, before joining forces with them against the humans, (so you get to slaughter your former comrades) before finally travelling back in time to the present day (well, 1997) to protect John Connor. Again. Can't that guy look after himself? New this time round is the inclusion of Arnie himself, providing both character model and voiceover, and this inclusion significantly enhances the atmospheric qualities of the game.
It's all fun at this point, and although scenes get a bit repetitive, there's enough robo-blasting to keep everyone entertained. It's great fun jumping behind the mounted gun turrets scattered throughout a post-apocalyptic L.A. to wreak havoc and, in some missions, to take out Skynet's spaceships and huge tanks (you know, the big scary ones that crush all those skulls at the start of T2).
Back in the present day, and our humble T-800 is forbidden from killing people, so non-lethal force is required, and here is where a couple of additional touches distinguish this from other Terminator titles. A quick flick of a button and Terminator vision is engaged, where the screen goes red and hundreds of options are simultaneously computed inside your head. Assess threats, and then take them out, all the while preventing any fatalities. Receiving damage results in the skin literally falling off Arnie, gradually exposing his metallic endo-skeleton. Occasionally throughout the game you'll scrap one-on-one with the tantalising TX, and the visible damage your character suffers is never more evident than here. Whilst neither detracting from or enhancing the gameplay, the fights do provide a bit of welcome relief from all the blasting. The enemy AI is surprisingly good, and although you're limited to simple one- and two-button combos, the TX will instantly suss you out if you use the same moves twice in a row.
So, what's not to love? Well, apart from the repetitiveness of some of the missions, there are some basic inconsistencies. The Terminator can receive a hail a bullets and grenades fired at him, or get beaten to a pulp, but fall 20 feet from a gantry and he'll die. Escorting John Connor is a bit annoying too - while you're charging through the hordes of SWAT troopers taking damage from every angle, he creeps through slower than a slug in wet cement. The other major downfall is the game is very short; if you're a competent gamer it won't last more than a day. However, there are loads of brilliant movie clips, stills and other treats to unlock, and T3: ROTM is a fun blaster that is a good accompaniment to the film. And he'll be back soon in 2004.
TERMINATOR: DAWN OF FATE
Hardly any strategy, but a repetitive and enjoyable shooter
Shooter - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 7.0/10
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Terminator.txtRead Review
Like The Thing before it, Terminator is a movie that's been crying out for video game justice. We've had several Termie games on various formats, but all have been non-starters that have failed to convey the terrifying, skull-crushing future dystopia of silicon vs carbon, where humanity is reduced to factions of underground resistance who don't get to wash very often. So does Dawn Of Fate come near to capturing the movie tension and parcelling it up into a playable video game? Very nearly...
It's a game that, like Blade 2, centres around combat and the limitless satisfaction to be had from blowing stuff up. And this combat does play out quite well, handing a decent level of control and battle options over to the player. You've got a lock-on auto-aim, melee attacks and a first-person view for when you want a bit more accuracy. Mixing them all up in the midst of a scrap is simple (well, once you've got used to the fact that you can't invert first-person view - D'oh!). Head shots will slay a T number on the spot, while sweep kicks will knock them off their feet if you're beginning to get surrounded.
The game captures the claustrophobic, unstoppable nature of the Terminators fairly well, too. They'll lumber slowly in your direction and will not halt until you've fed them a feast of gunfire. The visuals are average at best, offering some plush lighting effects but looking a bit underwhelming overall; grainy and grey, with patchy, low-res textures in the environments.
But, ooh, that camera. It uses Res Evil-style perspective switches, so you'll end up fighting into the screen and running all over the shop as the view changes position. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you get used to it.
If you're willing to put up with the camera, some below-par looks and the fact that there's little to the game but out-and-out combat, then you're in for a decent crack of futuristic blasting action that does medium-to-good justice to the mother of all movie licences.
TEST DRIVE OFF-ROAD: WIDE OPEN
The lack of vehicle/ground interaction will drive you nuts
Driving - Issue 3 (May 2002) - 3.5/10
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Test.txtRead Review
First impressions last, and the initial feeling you get from Test Drive Off-Road: Wide Open is the same one you get when you chuck the pad to the floor soon after sobbing "Dear God... no more!"
Start button your way to the vehicle select screen and you meet a range of trucks seemingly modelled directly from ineptly constructed Blue Peter cereal box/loo roll projects. We've seen more polygons on a GCSE maths paper. But graphics aren't everything, let's jump to a single race on one of the massive areas available.
Oh. Threadbare terrain seemingly poached directly from an early PlayStation 2 game. But let's see how the thing handles - even Mega Trolley Dash would be a fabulous game if it handled well enough.
Oh. Off-road vehicles without, it would appear, any suspension. Railway tracks, grass, gravel - vehicles don't notice the difference as they carry on without even the slightest wobble. There's no sensation of driving an all-terrain, slope-eating, elephant-worrying mean machine. All you get is a dull vehicular experience with minimal reward.
Briefly, things do get better. But only a bit. Unlock the lengthier races and it begins to feel like a racing game. Land a daring jump, ride the wall-of-death round a canyon rim to gain a few seconds, glance back as the pack splits into risk-takers and safe straight-liners then floor it to the next checkpoint... it's almost fun.
Then you realise that the AI, even on Easy level, is set to 'Robotic Nazi.' Cars stick to their racing lines like tube trains, and if you come to blows with one of the oversized heaps, you always, always come off worse, pinballing off ledges while the computer car doesn't even skid.
Trackside objects arbitrarily either shatter with the slightest nudge or halt you dead in your tracks. And while the interior dirt tracks of the stadium mode make for far less frustrating races, it's not enough - anyone familiar with early PS2 title Smugglers Run will, literally, be in familiar territory. Off Road: Wide Open is exactly the same, only inexplicably worse.
Sure, you can drive anywhere over the sprawling terrain, but you won't want to. Sure the career mode opens up better vehicles, but faster isn't any more fun. This is a PS2 hand-me-down that's scruffier than a car boot sale teddy bear. Even the title is off-key - Off Road: Wide Theybother is much better.
TETRIS WORLDS
Dilutes the impact of the original. Okay, but there's nothing new
Puzzle - Issue 9 (November 2002) - 6.0/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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Tetris.txtRead Review
There's a chance you may have heard of Tetris. No? We don't believe you. It's the video game equivalent of Lego. It has become so absorbed into popular culture that people who haven't played it know what it's about, like Space Invaders or Tomb Raider.
And, like Lego, anyone who comes into contact with Tetris becomes addicted to the simple-yet-fiendish fun on offer. The struggle with co-ordination and onscreen overcrowding to set up yet another line of blocks for clearance and breathing space makes it the undisputed king of puzzle games.
Tetris itself is timeless, but Tetris Worlds just isn't as appealing. In an attempt to sex up the game, garish colours, alternative modes and - crikey, Charlie - a story line have been added.
Thing is, the original Tetris is so finely balanced that altering it without changing what makes it so moreish and goddamn thumb-bustingly compulsive in the first place is tricky. Tetris Worlds is the perfect case in point.
It has a pile of new modes, each one putting a slight spin on the standard formula. That's 'slight' as in 'very very slight', so much so that nothing new is added to the experience. It's just the same old game, the one that came free with Nintendo's Game Boy over a decade ago. In Hotlines mode, for example, all you do is clear lines at specified heights, and nothing more.
This is the video game equivalent of a digitally remastered Beatles re-release. Everyone, with the exception of hardcore completist fans or cave-dwelling newbies, will already have experienced it enough already. Unless you find the multiplayer particularly appealing (in fairness, it is great four-way fun), then you're better off seeking Tetris somewhere else. Maybe as a free and legal internet download, on your mobile, via digital telly or maybe buying a second-hand Game Boy and a copy of the original for much less than the RRP of this title.
While everyone should play Tetris at some point, playing Tetris Worlds is another matter. The main core of the game is the compulsive brain-bondage of old but, in terms of value for money, this is a 14-year-old concept with a token facelift and little else.
THE BARD'S TALE
Not as expansive or visually impressive as other RPGs, but has enough of a refreshing approach to be absorbing
Screenshots - RPG - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 7.5/10
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Bard.txtRead Review
Screenshots:
When was the last time you laughed out loud at a game? Ours was during the opening tutorial of The Bard's Tale. We stumbled into a typically drunk group of NPCs in a typically clichéd inn after learning the central character's typically clichd past. You see where we're going here? But for all its referential attributes, the resulting drunken ballad (which players can sing along to with bouncing ball) allayed any fears of fairytale familiarity. This is one of the most self-deprecating games we've ever seen. And you thought The Princess Bride was a pisstake.
Everyone loves the class joker, but Bard's Tale packs a decent enough punch to keep the bullies away as well. It uses Baldur's Gate's Snowblind engine and, like a penny-slot peep show, the action's strictly top down. The Bard must travel the land, conversing with a host of colourful characters and completing quests, though, as he points out, coin and cleavage are his driving motives. The game is very dialogue heavy, though players' conversations aren't quite as branching as we'd like. The Bard occasionally has the option of choosing friendly or hostile responses, though these are denoted by happy and sad faces; we'd like to see what we're actually going to say before choosing. Also, more often than not, the conversation ends the same way, regardless of your responses. However, they impact brilliantly on the gameplay, as a previously irked character may reappear several hours into the game and deny you a quest or opportunity. There's no clear-cut right or wrong either, so players have a refreshing amount of freedom in their choices.
Speaking of which, quests are your standard RPG fare. Go here, talk to them, go and collect this, learn this spell etc, though Bard's Tale isn't afraid to mock even its own predictability. The Bard often turns to the camera to comment on the cheesiness of his situation, lamenting "All these tales are all the same." The narrator, with his home counties diction, is continually at odds with the Bard's swaggering cockney slang, and the constant bickering between the two provides many of the game's laughs.
Combat is obviously determined by a hit points system, though is thankfully in real time rather than being turn based. Players can buy tons of weapons and armour upgrades from the store, or use the Bard's magical capabilities in battle. Levelling up allows players to upgrade the Bard's physical capabilities, and you're also given a chance to hone specific skills, like dual wielding. As you progress you'll learn new spells, executed via the Bard's lute. These can be aggressive or protective in nature, though we found ourselves continually summoning a spiritual ally to fight alongside us, thus doubling our chances in combat. Cheap maybe, but with an endless supply of magical power, an easy option.
However, while the emphasis has been put into the game's comical touches, the graphics have been left to suffer. We monkeys may hear no evil but we certainly see a fair bit here. Okay, the game was developed a while ago (it's been in publishing limbo for the last couple of years) but it still looks inexcusably rough, in both character animation and environment design. The camera is slow to rotate, and has a disappointingly small zoom ability, though at least at that distance the characters still look acceptable.
If you can ignore this, you'll really enjoy The Bard's Tale. Not afraid to poke fun at itself or the genre, the game still has enough depth and replayability to please the most ardent RPG fans. When it's not mocking them...
THE CAT IN THE HAT
Colourful, faithful to the film, and mildly inventive, but the controls are laboured and it's very last-gen
Platformer - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 5.7/10
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TheCat.txtRead Review
Your eyes will sting after playing this game. Your brain will throb, and your focus will be smacked about too. It's an old-skool platformer dipped in a hallucinogen and feels at every turn as though men in white coats are out hunting it with butterfly nets.
Based on the forthcoming Mike Myers flick of the same name (which bombed on release in the US incidentally), you play Cat, the mischievous feline who gatecrashes a home on a rainy day in suburbia and brings bedlam with him. Nosy neighbour Alec Baldwin wants to put an end to the 'fun' and tries to steal the Cat's magic. A chase ensues, through various areas of the house, as Cat tries to track down Alec Baldwin and get his magic back. The boiler room is the fire level, the fridge is the ice level, the stereo is the musical level, and so on. It's like James Pond meets Pandemonium, two very old but quite well-respected titles for their time.
Some thought has been put into Cat In The Hat - it isn't just a straight film licence and cash-in, which, on first impressions, is what it looks like. With the use of your umbrella you trap enemies in bubbles, feed the bubbles into machines and convert them into super-bubbles capable of smashing metal barricades. It takes a bit of thinking to convert bubbles into super-bubbles, and involves a lot of pre-planning, backtracking, and thinking two steps ahead of yourself all the time. Some machines are blocked while others are out of reach, and it's up to you to traverse certain areas in order to unlock vital parts of a level.
Despite the inventive level design, the game is unintentionally sinister. Both Mike Myers and Alec Baldwin have been face-mapped, and look disjointed and broken when they walk. Baldwin scuttles about, his head lolling in every direction with a fixed expression plastered across his face. It's terrifying. You might just as well throw in the child-catcher and be done with it.
Level design isn't the only old-skool thing about Cat In The Hat, either. Graphically this is utterly last gen, an old moggy with no place on the Xbox. The controls are laboured, and let's face it, it's still a side-scrolling platformer. Some thought has been applied to the gaming process, but at its roots this game is so yesterday we're surprised it doesn't come on a cassette.
THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE
An entertaining puzzle adventure that's let down by a dull hack 'n slash ending
Adventure - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 7.3/10
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narnia.txtRead Review
Now we've had the benefit of seeing the game through the eyes of a ten-year-old, (albeit a 30-year-old man hypnotised into thinking he's a ten-year-old - which is what we did to Mark for the feature we ran in Issue 54), we can see how much fun this game can be for kids. But our mature adult brains are bound to hate this sort of generic licensed guff, right? Wrong - the simple puzzle-based action and top-class presentation of The Chronicles of Narnia actually exceeded all our usual expectations for a movie tie-in.
The game sticks faithfully to the plot of the motion picture, following the exploits of the four children - Peter, Edmund, Susan and Lucy - as they discover the secret world of Narnia inside a magic wardrobe, and help liberate its natives from the reign of the evil White Witch. The opening level kicks off with you trapped inside your house during a bombing of London in World War II - it's here that you're introduced to the abilities of the four playable children.
Peter, the older and stronger of the two boys, can move heavy objects (like cupboards in the house) and batter through doors and other blockades. He's also the most effective in melee combat. Edmund is the climber - he can scale trees, drainpipes, streetlamps and other bits of scenery. Susan specialises in long-range attacks, throwing projectiles like tennis balls. And little Lucy uses her petite size to squeeze through small openings into caves and other hard-to-reach areas. She can also magically heal her three siblings. We don't remember her being a magician in the film, but if it works for the game, we won't complain.
You can tap the Right trigger to switch control between the four children and solve simple environment-based puzzles in the beautiful outdoor world of Narnia. As you explore its snow-covered forests you'll be burning away bushes to clear paths, tip-toeing across frozen lakes avoiding the thin ice, or downing trees to form bridges. Action icons highlight significant parts of the scenery and show you which character to use - helpful for younger gamers, although more experienced players will find it a little patronising.
As well as exploring Narnia, other stages take you out of the wardrobe and into the real world, where you snoop around the house hiding in cupboards from the mean professor, who'll send you back to your room if he catches you. These contrasting levels keep the game feeling varied, making for some highly enjoyable adventuring.
But things go drastically wrong when later levels ditch the puzzles and resort to dull hack-'em-up missions that force you to fight endless waves of enemies. This is not only boring but painfully difficult, as huge swarms of enemies totally overwhelm you. It's not so bad if you connect a second controller and play co-operatively with a mate - a second player can join in at any point in the game, like in Lego Star Wars (Issue 42, 7.6). But that doesn't excuse the fact that these battles are a nightmare in single player, and a disappointingly shoddy end to an otherwise solid game.
Experienced gamers probably won't find anything new or challenging in The Chronicles of Narnia - it's simple and predictable. But it looks great, plays well and will no doubt occupy young fans of the film for a good ten hours or so.
THE CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK: ESCAPE FROM BUTCHER BAY
Stylish, atmospheric, violent. Outstanding visual feast with a tight, twisting script and intuitive controls
FPS - Issue 33 (September 2004) - 9.0/10
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TheChronicles.txtRead Review
And so the ever-twisting plot finds Riddick thrown into the notorious A wing, run by ruthless chief guard Cole, and here's where the game takes a significantly different tack to other FPS games. We're still seeing the world through the (as yet un-shined) eyes of Riddick, yet denied the luxury of a decent weapon in his hands, the muscle-bound maverick must find a different route to freedom. BT says it's good to talk, and although its logo isn't daubed in blood on the walls along with the other 'rules' of the wing, Riddick learns a hell of a lot from conversing with his fellow inmates. The numerous responses and multi-branching conversations pave the way for a whole host of non-linear missions more akin to an RPG/ adventure title than an all-out actioner.
Using his fists, Riddick must fight his way through his fellow scum, accepting or declining side-missions and requests from inmates. This degree of choice is emphasised during the lower prison levels, where Riddick has the option of peacefully making his way down to the mine level (by getting caught selling drugs) or violently beating his way to the door, both methods entailing various sub-missions. There's a fair bit of to-ing and fro-ing between bouts, and frequent loading screens will start to grate a little, but this is the slowest part of the game so bear with it.
The combat controls are simple, and it's vital to get tooled-up for these bouts too, so acquire a shiv (more choices - either buy one or carry out a few favours) and you'll be meaner than Scrooge before payday. There's a fair degree of unarmed combat throughout the game (Riddick is frequently recaptured and stripped of his weapons), and although it could've turned out to be a really monotonous interruption to the action, great execution and just the right mix of fisticuffs and firearms keeps the game cracking along at a good pace.
It's all very well talking the talk, but boy, can Riddick walk the (cat)walk too - this is one of the best-looking games ever to blast its way onto Xbox. From the stylish, moodily scored movie-style follow-cam opener, we know we're in for a visual treat. Absolutely stunning real-time lighting is used to great effect, creating gorgeous shadows and gloriously gritty or stunningly slick and sleek textures and surfaces. We're talking Kelly Brook meets Rachel Stevens here. And on the subject of models, Vin Diesel had a huge part in the development process, and the great character modelling means Riddick looks and moves exactly how he would in real life. Atmosphere is one thing, but Chronicles takes it further by successfully recreating the hell of Butcher Bay at its grittiest. You can practically feel the stagnant water dripping over you in the deserted service areas, smell the musky ruins of the mining levels, and the sewer levels, packed with disfigured mutants and you with only a fading flashlight for comfort, has to be played to be believed. Just keep the lights on...
So, enough of the exterior - how does the game really play? Well the engine bounds along smoothly enough, and a decent framerate makes for an enjoyable, immersive experience as you work through the facility, wasting guards left, right and centre. The camera switches to a third-person perspective when Riddick starts clambering around and over objects, and although this allows greater manoeuvrability than in FPS mode, players can't shoot and climb at the same time - a pain if you emerge at the top of a ladder at an enemy's feet. Certain pre-rendered cutscenes show Riddick making a daring escape, but we'd have liked to physically play through them ourselves.
We've covered the gorgeous lighting, but the shadows are soon dispersed by the blinding muzzle flash of the arsenal of meaty weapons at Riddick's disposal, including pistols, shotguns, grenades, automatic rifles and a fearsome mini-gun that peppers enemies all around the screen, making use of the fantastic ragdoll physics engine. The mix of unarmed combat and gameplay is finely judged; just when you start to tire of stealth kills and yearn for a weapon in your hands, along comes a guard with an un-encoded, and very inviting shotgun to have some fun with.
The great-looking environment is also open to interaction, including some destructible scenery and those conveniently placed explosive barrels that no shooter would be complete without. Once you get your lovely shiny new eyes, light switches can be toggled on and off and bulbs blown out to create your own darkness, confusing enemies and gaining the advantage. But enemies will only be confused to a certain extent, because the AI is top notch. The inquisitive guards will investigate the slightest noise and actively seek the best cover when you fire at them. The crafty beggars will roll back and forth behind pillars and strategically back each other up through intelligent firing positions, proving challenging opponents. Just try going toe to toe with a guard beefed up in the brutal Battle Armour and see how long you last.
And so the story twists and turns, with Riddick, no matter what he does, seemingly incapable of evading recapture. Worming his way out of the desolate mines (after unleashing hordes of murderous monsters), the game shifts up a gear and everything really starts going off. The guards and beasts are going at it in the shower block, providing ample distraction for Riddick to pick them off at will and make his escape. The terrifying darkened corridors return, and the creatures do their best to scuttle around your flashlight beam and catch you unawares.
After waking up in the cryogenic chamber, the hulking hero wastes no time at all commandeering an armoured walker. This is fantastic fun to wander around in, laying waste to the entire level. It's a bit of a shame then, that this hectic pace couldn't have been sustained all the way through the game, because as far as balls-out blasting goes, this is right up there with the best of them.
We could chastise the lack of multiplayer options (there aren't any at all), but the game does exactly what it set out to do: provide a gorgeous-looking, scintillating single-player action title to accompany the film. The brilliant mix of hand-to-hand and armed combat, paired with an intriguing plot and various sub-missions, means you'll be hooked right through to the end of this Diesel-fuelled, Riddickulously slick shooter. Don't be afraid of the dark when it looks this good.
THE DA VINCI CODE
The more-popular-than-air religious conspiracy thriller gets a pretty decent Broken Sword-style adaptation
Puzzle/Adventure - Issue 57 (July 2006) - 7.2/10
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xmenofficial.txtRead Review
You wouldn't be wrong to avoid movie licences like you would dog turds, because they have a tendency to stink. But X-Men: The Official Game mixes face-smashing brutality, super-teleporting acrobatics and flying together with lush visuals to create one hard-hitting mutant romp. Movie licence or otherwise, this is not a game you should turn your nose up at.
To begin with, X-Men: The Official Game is actually a prequel to the third movie, not a direct adaptation. As you progress you'll experience the intertwining plots of the three playable characters, although the stories take a bit of a back seat in what is essentially an all-out action game. You'll punch your way through armies of soldiers with Wolverine, teleport and flick acrobatically around intricately designed environments with Nightcrawler, and swoop through the skies shooting frozen lasers with Iceman. It's good fun.
You'd expect, in typical lazy movie-conversion style, that you'd be playing through samey levels with almost identical characters, save for a few different attacks. But not here - what you'll find are three vastly different experiences, with unique levels designed for the specific play-style of each character.
Wolverine has always been a brawler, so his missions are of a traditional hack-'em-up style. Very little thought is required - soldiers charge at you with bats, electric stun batons and even machine-guns, and you run at them to pound their faces hard until they don't move any more.
Wolverine can charge his health back as well, so there's even less need for thought - if your life bar is looking low you can hide for a moment to allow it to replenish itself. Of course, later levels will throw so many enemies at you that the opportunity to rest becomes a rarity, and when things get desperate you'll have to make use of Wolverine's Fury attack. The Fury attack bar charges as Wolverine rips chunks out of his foes. When it's fully charged, a tap of the Right trigger will send him into a fit of psychotic rage, increasing his speed and strength for about ten seconds. So when you're getting your head kicked in, you can turn the tables and smash through groups of enemies with ease, grinning with satisfaction as you do so.
But slashing enemies to death is all Wolverine's missions ask of you, and endless hammering of the X and Y buttons can get pretty dull for anyone not into simplistic Gauntlet-style brawling. Thankfully, both Nightcrawler's and Iceman's missions are a little more inventive...
Nightcrawler is basically the Prince of Persia with the added ability of teleportation, and thanks to some brilliantly designed controls, his missions are fantastic fun. Leaping from thin ledges to poles and spinning off pipes is fast, yet so easy you won't even need to think about it. And teleporting to the exact place you want is made easy by a clever little blue dot that hovers over the platform or pole that your camera is focused on. Hit R and Nightcrawler will disappear in a puff of hazy purple smoke, to materialise where the blue dot was positioned.
With these cool powers, Nightcrawler's brilliantly designed missions will have you snooping stealthily around enemy installations, using his agility to get around on the intricate piping systems above the heads of patrolling guards. Not that you really need to hide, though, as he's an awesome fighter too. You can lock onto enemies with the L trigger, then tap the R trigger to teleport behind them and unleash a lethal flurry of punches and kicks the instant you materialise. You'll feel invincible when gun-brandishing guards desperately try to shoot you as you teleport rapidly to different platforms, then appear behind them to kick their dirty ass before they can even react.
Then Z-Axis changes the flavour of the game completely with Iceman's missions, which take you to the open outdoors to swoop around fighting aerial battles with various flying foes. Iceman doesn't fly himself, but casts his own personal icy path in mid-air directly ahead of him, then slides along it like a crazy person.
We were worried Iceman's missions would suffer from poor controls and repetitive dogfight scenarios after playing so-so preview versions. But our expectations were exceeded with varied action-packed missions that have you, say, racing through winding tunnels shooting enemies before they reach a reactor core, or battling flame-throwing mutants as you try desperately to douse the flames of burning buildings, making for some of the most action-packed levels in the game.
Iceman's overall gameplay has also been considerably improved, with both his weapons - the short-range Ice Beam and the rocket-like Hailstorm projectile - receiving a significant power increase. And it's also a lot easier to hit enemies now that Z-Axis has tightened the controls, with a lock-on system that allows you to nail distant foes with your Hailstorm with the greatest of ease. The controls still aren't perfect though. Accelerate is on the A button, while slowing down requires you to tug on the R trigger, which doesn't feel at all natural. All speed control should have been placed either on the Left and Right triggers, or on the face buttons. Mixing the two just confuses our brains. Also, Iceman's a bit lacking in the manoeuvrability stakes when it comes to those tunnel levels, where you have to avoid moving walls, dodge beams of electricity AND shoot enemies at the same time.
It's flawed, sure, but it doesn't stop the game from being fun, and it's certainly above the typical standards of movie-licence games nowadays. The game challenges your finger-mashing skills, not your puzzle-solving ability, though, so as long as you don't expect a deep, involving cranium workout, you won't be at all disappointed.
THE DUKES OF HAZZARD: RETURN OF THE GENERAL LEE
Not worth looking at. It's so sub-GTA and sub-FlatOut, you have to ask why the licence is still being flogged
Driving - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 4.7/10
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Dukes.txtRead Review
Just the good ol' boys, never meanin' no harm. Beats all you've ever saw, been in trouble with the law since the day they was born... And what law would that be? The law of gravity? Relativity? Crack open the moonshine, the Duke boys have discovered how to turn a Dodge Charger into a space hopper. Watch it bounce, boys!
The Return Of General Lee heralds yet another outing for Bo, Luke, Daisy... actually, 'herald' is too strong a word. Replace that with 'announces with the inevitable certainty of death' yet another outing for Bo, Luke, and Daisy. Boss Hogg is planning to knock down an orphanage and the Dukes need to put an end to his dastardly deeds by driving around a generic countryside picking up crates and plunging through the glitch-tastic scenery. It's a real doozy.
The General Lee isn't exactly the most robust of vehicles - not at all the dirt-churning beast of the TV show. Maybe it's been on Atkins? It'll dart into the air or flip onto its side at the sight of a threatening pebble. The car's so bouncy it's a wonder it remains on the road at all. The terrain, regardless of whether it's off-road, tarmac, or a field of peanut bushes (yes, really) all have the same effect. You might just as well play Bolero and call it Jane Torville. It's slip, slide, skid, spin.... God forbid encountering an AI car on the roads. Rumbling around on pre-set pathways, if you get in their way, kiss your ass goodbye.
On the plus side, the voice talent (Daisy and the boys are all here) is great, and there are times when you briefly feel as though you're in an old episode. Overall, this game thinks it's something of a redneck GTA, but it's so lacklustre. We've seen and done this all before, but with more panache. It might not be 'Grand Theft Awful', but it's close.
THE GODFATHER
EA makes you an offer you might find difficult to refuse
Action - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 8.2/10
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godfather.txtRead Review
Several MONTHS late and with the stinging criticisms from the movie trilogy's director, Francis Ford Coppola, still ringing in its ears, The Godfather has a big point to prove. The point being that the good name of the revered films won't be tarnished by a crude videogame cash-in project.
With such baggage weighing it down it'd be easy to dismiss The Godfather, but even purists will have to drop at least one disapproving raised eyebrow at the result. Instead of harming the legacy, the game clearly has a lot of respect for its source material, and doesn't shy away from the violent and gory subject matter. It's even got the confidence to dispense with much of the trilogy's talkiness and concentrate on ramping up the violence even further, creating a veritable bloodbath of an action game.
Marlon Brando's death soon after recording his lines for the game also gives this an almost macabre appeal - although whether they all made it, we're not sure. It's Brando's Don Vito Corleone who takes your character under his wing at the beginning - an obligation forced upon him after you witness the murder of your old man at the hands of gangsters as a nipper. Your long-term goal is to usurp Vito as the head of the Corleone family, and then eventually become the Don of New York.
Before any of that you get to create a character from scratch - your angry young man not actually existing in any of the movies. Using a similar system to that found in the Tiger Woods games, you can model the way your character looks and more importantly dresses, shaping everything from how hollow his cheekbones are to the colour of his slacks. Whatever looks, clothes and haircut you select, that's how your character appears in all the subsequent cut-scenes. It's just a pity there isn't a system whereby the smarter you look, the more respect you earn right from the beginning. Still, we defy anyone not to go on an ego trip and create a version of themselves.
Classic Italian-American looks and style are one thing, but you're still a nobody until you've earned the trust of the family and helped raise its reputation. To rise through the Corleone ranks you'll need to take on a mixture of main story missions and side missions, exploring every aspect of the game to reach the very top.
Scenes from The Godfather movie appear as missions, with your character initially taking a backseat role but eventually making a more active contribution to the most famous bits. For instance, in the early training missions you witness the stabbing in the hand and strangulation of Luca Brasi, and must gun down the henchmen who carry out the act before escaping by car. Later, you're the person who keeps watch and creates a safe passage for another grunt to behead Khartoum the racehorse and deliver it to the bed of Woltz, the movie producer. And later still, you're the guy who hides the gun in the cistern in the restaurant, allowing Michael Corleone to collect it and kill Sollozzo and McClusky. It's just a shame that Al Pacino chose to lend his likeness to the Scarface game instead.
Sensibly, EA has done much more than cherry pick the best bits from the film - since despite the three-hour running time it'd make for a pretty short-lived game if that were all there was. Your actions in this living, breathing city have a definite impact on how people act towards you, and how tough it is venturing into certain parts of town. Kill too many innocents or steal too many cars and your heat level rises, forcing the cops to arrest you or even shoot on sight. That said, you can bribe cops to turn a blind eye to your activities, with higher-ranking officers bending the rules for longer. Wasting too many gangsters from the same family also makes life harder since you risk turning manageable rivalries into all-out vendetta warfare, leading to a situation where you can't walk through a neighbourhood without being shot at. This ebb and flow of heat and vendettas helps prevent the game from becoming stale or repetitive.
You'll spend a lot of your time extorting businesses, which is your main source of income. Uncooperative owners can be dealt with in two ways, either by beating them to breaking point (but not going overboard so you end up murdering them or they refuse to co-operate altogether) or destroying parts of their shop. Once a shopkeeper is on your side, a backroom door in the building may also be unlocked, behind which you'll find a controllable racket. If you want to earn even more pocket money you can try to take over an entire chain of rackets, and even control the warehouses and transport hubs along the supply chain. Plenty of firepower is needed for these larger operations though, and it isn't worth your while attempting them until you've earned plenty of respect and got your hands on the bigger guns. Still, the fact that the game gives you the choice is pretty impressive.
Melee combat is handled fairly unusually in The Godfather. Like the Fight Night games, moving both analogue sticks controls all your attacks. A quick push toward an enemy on the Right stick performs a standard punch, while a stronger blow calls for the same stick to be pulled back first and then released - as if you're winding up a big punch. Pressing the Left and Right triggers together grabs an opponent, allowing you to hit him, throw him, strangle him or slam him into parts of the environment. Our favourite? Throwing a pug-nosed mobster into a baker's oven. It's quick and leaves no traces. The controls take some getting used to, especially if you haven't played Fight Night before, but in allowing you to manage the level of violence in each fight there's no other workable system.
Less successful is the driving, which fortunately doesn't take up too much of the game. At least not in terms of actual missions, though there's plenty of to-ing and fro-ing to be done behind the wheel in order to get around the huge city, and reach each mission location. The cars feel extremely flimsy and lightweight, and also manage to reach speeds way above what you'd expect cars from this period to be able to make. Furthermore, the cops who often give chase after you complete a job are a bit on the dense side, often slamming head-on into vehicles coming the opposite way even when there's plenty of room either side of the road. In this respect it's no GTA, or even Driver for that matter.
But as clones go, The Godfather is one of the better ones. It's got a unique atmosphere all of its own, due largely to the quality period setting, and manages to stay faithful to the film while carving out some interesting takes on classic scenes. It just looks and sounds very professional. There's plenty of extortion, murder and exploring on the side to occupy your time too, so you'll never get bored of doing the same thing over and over again. Not the most ambitious or original of games, but very well made and definitely not the travesty fans of the films were expecting.
THE GREAT ESCAPE
Tense and pretty exciting with varied gameplay and well-paced missions
Action adventure - Issue 20 (September 2003) - 7.6/10
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TheGreat.txtRead Review
Things haven't been rosy between Germany and good old Blighty over the past 100 years. If it's not Michael Owen bagging hat tricks or suspect Middle-Eastern foreign policies causing friction, it's the small matter of two World Wars and one World Cup that have sent relationships spiralling towards boiling point.
The 1963 movie The Great Escape, based on real-life Allied POW escape exploits of WWII, plays heavily on those jagged emotions. Sensitive souls of Germanic origin will probably have gnashed their teeth at the thoroughbred Allied heroics, whilst those closer to home are more likely to have punched the air with patriotic pride. Pivotal's belated gaming spin-off follows suit, cashing in on such sensitivities and producing a damn fine, playable action adventure into the bargain.
With no Vin Diesel or Cameron Diaz to attract an audience (its main star, Steve McQueen, has been dead for the last 23 years), the developer has resorted to innovation and genuine thrills to pull in the punters. And nowhere is that better illustrated than through its intelligent plot structure.
The essential parts of the movie have been orchestrated into a larger, more sweeping, multi-narrative epic like a WWII Pulp Fiction. Four of the film's key stars are introduced via a series of individual missions. These range from locating and destroying crucial documents in a farmyard to tunnelling out of captivity and speeding away in a Nazi convoy. While such ventures are additions to the film's plot, the interesting twist is that each path criss-crosses until all protagonists are assembled at the movie's infamous Stalag Luft III POW camp.
Progression is rigidly linear but, when it comes to variety, this game strikes a rumbling power chord of AC/DC proportions. There are puzzles, there's fighting, there's dashing and darting; there's scheming, there's panicking, there's (very basic) titter-tattering with fellow camp life. But above all else, there's stealth. Although sprinting to destinations can work well on occasion, creeping around is far more intrinsic to the art of evasion. You can worm around on your stomach or prowl cautiously, weaving in and out of shadows as you collect tools, discuss escape plans or, depending on your setting, surprise enemies by emptying a stolen pistol into their heads.
Stealth, implemented well, invites tension, and this performs the job crisply. Understated piano scores gnaw away at your composure
as Aussie wisecracker Sedgwick crawls Predator-like past glowing camp lights, melting into the night-time darkness safe from observant Nazi eyes. And elsewhere, the purposeful Scots airman MacDonald edges through remote mountain-tops, his presence provoking an unsympathetic hail of gunfire from behind a snow-caked truck. If your heart isn't badgered by events in this game, chances are it stopped ticking weeks ago.
But too many PSone-isms spoil the broth, and some of the fighting is hampered by an appalling targeting system that makes it bizarrely difficult to hit enemies at close range. Nail a Jerry 50 yards away with a rifle - no probs - blast a Gestapo henchman from a couple of feet - hmm, London, we have a problem.
There are other complaints too. Now, excuse us for being anal, but should we really accept doors opening and shutting in both directions? Or characters responding in an unintentionally comedic (and quite dated) manner? Walk innocently up to a German (a train ticket collector, for example) and some inexplicably adopt a startled self-defence posture, like an amateur hunter facing a herd
of rampaging buffalo. Was it something we said? Or maybe an offensive overusing of Red Cross-issue aftershave...?
Next comes the AI, which, while generally good, is certainly erratic. Smash a bottle to create a diversion and guards don't always respond. One watchman even decided there was nothing remotely suspicious about a gaping cooler door with a picked lock, pushing it shut again and ignoring the fact that there was an intruder crouched illegally inside. No wonder his job application at Colditz was refused...
So really, this is a game with some absolutely brilliant moments, and some shockingly bad ones. At times, The Great Escape will demand a hearty slap on the back, a stiff upper-lipped 'jolly good show, old boy' and an extra ration of chocolate for its ingenious reworking of a vintage film licence. Then the flawed combat will smack you hard, some high frustration levels will briefly tear at your soul and the disappointing character appearances will invoke bayonet-prodding tours of your local city centre.
But just as there is a sunny day above every gathering of clouds, the good in this game vastly outweighs the bad. If you enjoyed the movie, you'll find enormous pleasure here. It's got verve, guile and charisma, and it's blessed with that infamous Steve McQueen motorbike chase. Risk aggravating our European relations once more and give those Jerries what for, eh? You know it makes sense.
THE HAUNTED MANSION
Creepy, kooky, spooky fun. Great originality and freshness, and no sign of Eddie Murphy
Adventure - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 7.8/10
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TheHaunted.txtRead Review
Listen carefully, intrepid adventurer. In the dark midnight hour a church bell tolls, and long-legged beasties come a-creeping. Hark! A bump in the night! Is it the thud of lumbering zombie feet? A decapitated head hitting the floor? No. It's a heavy bag of pound coins landing at dead Uncle Walt's feet. The movie's out, the action figures are out, and so is the game. The Haunted Mansion is on full merchandise attack and this cash cow should rake in the pennies.
First up, a squillion Brownie points for basing the game on the Disney ride rather than the dismal film. Not a peek of Axel Foley or Daddy Day Care to be seen. This is an Eddie Murphy-free zone. Instead, the game is closely tied to the ride and benefits greatly because of the association. Secondly, it may be riding on the back of the very loosest of film tie-ins (ignoring Pirates of the Caribbean), but it's incredible fun and not at all the disaster you'd expect.
As hapless caretaker Zeke Halloway, you must capture the 999 malevolent spirits who have forced the resident ghosts into hiding. They've turned off all the power so they can hide from you in the shadows. Armed with a magical lantern, you must travel through each room restoring the power, capturing the evil ghosts, and liberating the nice ones. Each room requires first the solving of a puzzle to restore the power, then the opportunity to get all Peter Venkman by trapping ghosts in your lantern. Although you may not think it, the 'somebody find a fuse'-style puzzles are beautifully varied, and range from herding enchanted candles to coaxing a poltergeist into flamb?ing the kitchen.
There's also a hearty dollop of chills, as though Dracula had been given Grabbed By The Ghoulies and farted around with it in his shed for a weekend. Tots be warned, it may be aimed at your demographic, but it is genuinely creepy.
Perhaps the main strength of The Haunted Mansion is its ability to slip straight into the third-person adventure genre as a film tie-in, and come out the other side as a title which has brought great originality and freshness with it. It's not benchmark material by any means, but it more than surpasses your expectations and takes great pleasure in putting the willies up you. Chilling, funny, and surprisingly without a sign of rot anywhere.
THE HOBBIT
Solid, simple platformer. Recreates Middle-Earth well and tells the story beautifully
Platformer - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.0/10
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VU03502E)
TheHobbit.txtRead Review
As you can clearly see from these screens, The Hobbit follows a light-hearted approach to Tolkien's story that was written for his children, and quite right too. Back then, the legendary One Ring wasn't the threat to Middle-Earth it turned out to be in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. It was all smiles, songs, butterbeer and stories of treasure guarded by the almighty dragon Smaug atop the Lonely Mountain.
As super-reluctant explorer Bilbo Baggins, you get plucked out of your nice, cosy home in the Shire to be whisked away by Gandalf and a pack of dwarves to steal Smaug's impressive pension fund. Once you've closed the door to Bag End, there's no turning back as you set off to meet the dwarves and get this adventure started.
But before you even reach the bottom of the hill, you have the chance to speak to a variety of local NPCs who each have a little quest ready for you. These include everything from 'find my hammer, so I can build a bridge' to 'look for the children in a game of hide and seek'. Don't worry though, this is where the sub-quest madness ends and it's entirely up to you what you do or don't - as will more likely be the case - take on. And yes, it will remind you of the Zelda series but don't let that put you off. It's all good.
Each area of Middle Earth you wander across is huge at first contact, but you'll quickly realise that things are a lot more linear than they seem, which is great. You won't get lost or find yourself walking round in circles thanks to the blue gems that litter the way forward. The scenery even changes when objectives are completed to allow your journey to continue. You'll be looking for the way out of a cave and all of a sudden notice a ladder that wasn't there before, again with little blue gems along it. This really is no-brain gaming at times but if it saves hours of aimlessly roaming the hills of Middle-Earth, it's fine by us.
Combat is also on the simple side. Pull out your weapon of choice and rapidly hit the A button. You'll need to time your Hobbit-sized combos and use the jump function to reduce the risk of Bilbo getting beaten like a Gollum. Some form of blocking should definitely have been included though! A little bit of stealth is required in certain sections, especially when you acquire the One Ring.
Controlling little Bilbo is easy and this is important, as there are plenty of platforms to jump onto and ropes to swing and climb. There's nothing worse than a platform game that controls like a tank when you have to get to those hard-to-reach places to continue. Thankfully, Bilbo moves with the grace and co-ordination of a ninja, which isn't bad for a Hobbit with huge, fat, hairy feet... and Ben should know. All in, The Hobbit is pleasing to the eyes and soothing to the ears but most importantly it's fun to play - simple fun, but still fun.
THE HOUSE OF THE DEAD III
A fun, polished arcade game. Looks wonderful but gets repetitive
Shooter - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 7.1/10
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SE00805E)
TheHouse.txtRead Review
Sega's House of the Dead series has a lot of devoted fans. There's just something amazingly gratifying about blasting wave after wave of undead characters to smithereens in this arcarde-style shooting frenzy. And you get to use that lightgun you bought.
The widespread appeal of the series now means that Xbox owners get to play this third instalment of zombie blastage. Sega hasn't brought out a lightgun this time around, but to coincide with the release of the game there are a few third-party guns on the market. We used the splendid Thrustmaster gun to review the title, as it's just not the same with a pad - and if you splash out on the game we'd suggest you do the same. That said, it's still fairly playable with the Xbox Controller - a bit like an FPS on a set route.
Once you've loaded it all up and got your gun in hand, you'll find that it's pretty much business as usual in zombie land. As is typical for the series, it's something of a visual showcase - gloriously chunky and vibrant graphics cement the arcadey feel, and enemies are highly detailed and well designed. Old favourites like the axe-wielding, lumberjack-shirted zombies are joined by new enemies that are a pleasure to riddle with bullet holes. The undead fatties are our current favourites.
There are changes to the way the game plays, too, although they're only subtle. The main difference is that your character is now armed with a shotgun, rather than a pistol - the wider firing area is handy, while the longer reload time isn't. There's also more in the way of alternate routes this time around, meaning
the game offers a little more in the way of replayability than its predecessors.
Despite the additions, though, the game still suffers from that most common complaint of lightgun shooters - it gets very repetitive, very quickly. The game is fundamentally designed to keep you pumping the nuggets in the slot in an arcade environment, and in the home it's not long before the shortcomings of this approach are exposed.
Still, with a couple of players the game is always worth a bash - and high-score enthusiasts will keep coming back to The House of the Dead III until their ranking is suitably impressive. But for everyone else, the game's a tad too shallow to justify shelling out on the necessary lightguns.
THE HULK
Standard, fun arcade smash 'em up. Lots of moves and easy controls
Action - Issue 18 (July 2003) - 7.5/10
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VV00801E)
TheHulk.txtRead Review
He's big, bad, mean and green. The latest in a long line of superheroes finally stops holding hands with Wolverine and Spider-Man and steps forward from the chorus line of Marvel characters to grab the spotlight and show off his considerable talents. Comic genius Stan Lee first conceived the Hulk character back in 1962 and since then he's appeared in everything from comics and books to a long-running TV show (with the most depressing theme music ever) and now a feature length movie. The Hulk has hit town in a typically big way and, with a simultaneous cinema release, the betting is it's gonna be a big green summer.
But the success of superhero games depends on one critical element: is it actually fun to play as the main man? Recent Superman and Batman titles suffered from such poor execution that a toddler chucking a tantrum would be more effective than the clumsy 'hero' characters. Wolverine went some way to redress the balance with X-Men 2: Wolverine's Revenge (Issue 17, 7.4) but the superhero audience has naturally grown sceptical. Well, just like his colour and size, Hulk threatens to be a breed apart. But it had better be good or we'll be getting angry - and you wouldn't like it when we're angry (sorry).
Bruce Banner is one seriously unlucky guy. You would think you'd been dealt a bad enough hand if you just crashed your car, but then to watch helplessly as your wife dies because you don't have the strength to save her... well that just makes it a day to forget. But it gets worse! You go back to your lab and start trying to find a way to tap into hidden human strength, only to end up receiving a dose of gamma radiation that's big enough to keep a large town in microwave dinners for the next 50 years. And as a dodgy side effect, every time you get annoyed you turn into a massive green bloke who outgrows Banner's clothes in an instant (think of the clothing bills) and gains more anti-social behaviour orders than a van load of pikeys on a weekend shopping spree. Get this guy a lottery ticket because his luck has to hit the curve soon.
And it has, because Mr Banner (and his green alter ego) is the star of a pretty decent superhero game. The Hulk is a third-person 3D action title that takes its lead one year on from the movie. The plot in these types of games is rarely important, but for the record you've been betrayed by a friendly professor who has stolen the essence of Hulk (which sounds like a naff aftershave) for the benefit of the main villain, imaginatively called The Leader. The Leader needs the gamma goodness to create his own army of super-charged villains, so naturally it's your job to chase down the bad guy and right a few wrongs.
The title is distinctly split into two different gameplay styles. There are times when you're plain old Bruce Banner and then there's the main meat of the game when you get to open one jumbo can of whup-ass in Hulk mode. Naturally, this is where the fun starts.
One of the first things you'll notice is how the scenery responds to your actions. It's interactive in a big way. Jump up in the air and when you land the ground will disintegrate into a spider web of cracks. Punch a wall (really, any wall) and plaster will crumble to the ground revealing the stonework behind it. Got a locked door? Then, as Jim Morrison would say, break on through to the other side.
Dust and debris will trail in your wake and, because you're the Hulk with superhuman strength, you can use any number of mad objects as weapons. Hammer a pipe till it falls off and voil, you've got a makeshift bat that can either be swung or thrown. You can do damage with pretty much everything you can get your big green mitts on and, in later stages in particular, it's essential to use the environment to the best of your ability.
You've also got a wealth of melee attacks at your disposal. Simple three-hit two-button combos are the general order of the day, and the effects are naturally devastating. In addition there's a ton of other moves you can pull off. Holding down the punch button results in a charge attack, another button produces a projectile wave called Sonic Clap (jokes about aural STDs will be ignored). You can also pick guys up and either chuck them at a target or just bitch-slap them for fun. Then there are suspended jump attacks and, to top it all off, when you get really angry you can unleash a couple of devastating power-up moves that will knock the socks off people in the next town. The strength of this title lies in the destruction you can wreak and it doesn't disappoint.
But where there's strength there's usually weakness, and with The Hulk it's a case of double trouble. Being forced to play through some stages as the feeble Banner really brings the game enjoyment down a few notches. You're supposed to be all sneaky-like and avoid the enemy, but in practice the basic nature of the stealth levels (you don't even get the obligatory peering around the corner shot) are just a little too amateurish to really add any feeling of gameplay depth.
There's also repetition. With the exception of having to crack a number of code input challenges and the token stealth stages, it really is just a case of ploughing through wave after wave of bad guys before reaching various big bosses. But what helps matters is the visual presentation. The environments are pretty standard but the characters are gorgeous. The Hulk and all the opposing villains benefit from a terrific, smooth cel-shaded effect that really does work very well. Fans of comic art will get their brushes wet because the character style coupled with some very impressive animated cutscenes successfully give the impression that you're playing through a comic book.
The Hulk is currently top of the pile in terms of superhero games. It's an enjoyable arcade smash 'em up that's manna for the mainstream and good fun to boot. The only boundaries being broken here are of the concrete kind, but that doesn't stop it from being a fun title that's worth some consideration from anyone who wants to smash stuff up.
THE INCREDIBLE HULK: ULTIMATE DESTRUCTION
The fastest, most frantic superhero title of late, and one of the most fun games on Xbox. A sure-fire smash hit
Screenshots - Action - Issue 46 (September 2005) - 8.5/10
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VU05702E)
Hulk.txtRead Review
Screenshots:



Read the title again. Go on. Ultimate Destruction, they say. If it's true that the Ronseal bloke's stuff does exactly what it says on the tin, then it stands to reason that this game should let you trash everything on screen with a mere flick of your giant green wrist. Well, you can. And it feels bloody amazing too. This sequel to the original smash-action title The Hulk (Issue 18, 7.5) is all about fun. Tons of it. Hell, we couldn't have had more fun than this if we were dipped in chocolate and thrown to a baying crowd of lesbians. We've reluctantly put the pad down after an exhaustive session of hammering the game, and if it weren't for the basic human needs of water, food and sleep, we'd still be sat in front of the TV, lost in an orgy of twisted metal and conspiracy-clobbering madness.
The game is governed by Smash points, and, if you can't tell by now, is all about destroying things - as in, every tangible object in the game world. Sure there's a decent enough storyline running through the game, and the script is pleasing comic-book fare: scientist and all-round evil government cohort Emil Blonsky, head of top-secret military project 'The Division', is conducting experiments to test the effects of mutation on humans. Striving to find a cure for both himself and Dr Banner, he ropes in the help of fellow mutants and otherworldly creatures in a sinister bid for world domination, as he himself descends into madness as Abomination. However, in reality each story mission is merely an excuse for the relentless smashing and obliteration of everything in sight. And we cannot stress enough that this is A Good Thing.
The fantastic level design complements the action. A huge, free-roaming environment across both city and wasteland locations provides an awesome playground to leap and bound around. In this sequel, Hulk can run up, down and across buildings, simply by holding down sprint (R trigger). This paves the way for expanding the playing area vertically as well as horizontally, and it's a degree of freedom that equals that that of other Marvel comic-book conversion, Spider-Man 2 (Issue 32, 8.6). The Hulk's supercharged jumping ability makes bounding around his surroundings quick and simple, and once you get the hang of super-bouncing on the fly, you can cover huge distances in a short amount of time, which is often vital in time-based missions.
After every mission finishes, you can revert back to the current environment and tear around it to your heart's content, destroying stuff as you see fit. Earning extra Smash points is the incentive here, and there are loads of Challenge missions available. We're not just talking dull GTA-style races against the clock, either - these fun mini-games are a genuinely refreshing breather form the manic, all-out action of the main missions.
This has also allowed Radical to go to town when designing the enemies Hulk faces. The puny tanks from the first game are lame when compared to the helicopters, armour-clad soldiers and fearsome robotic Hulkbusters the jolly green giant has to face this time around. A progressive learning curve ensures you earn enough points and learn sufficient moves to defeat the progressively tougher enemies - they're still tough, but the well-balanced difficulty level means it's enjoyable and achievable. Boss battles are of the traditionally pleasing old-skool type; daunting at first, but stick at it and you'll find a chink in their armour and figure out a way of taking them down. It's satisfying retro-style fun.
One of the biggest differences fans of the first game will notice is the complete absence of the rubbish Bruce Banner missions that plagued the original. This lets you spend more time doing what the Hulk does best, which is battering the crap out of things. Great! The visuals have been given a serious update from the original, too - think the difference between Lou Ferrigno's moderately scary green-painted bodybuilder in the 70s show, compared to the fearsome CGI monster of the film a couple of years ago and you're only halfway there. Incredible-looking, moody, atmospheric cut-scenes punctuate highly detailed, semi-cel-shaded in-game graphics that both look 'da bomb' and perfectly capture that comic-book feel.
Smash points, unsurprisingly, are accumulated by destroying every object within smashing distance of the Hulk, with bonus points awarded for pulling off multi-hit combos and successfully completing each story mission. Your points can then be used to buy more combat moves at the end of each mission, more of which (up to 150) are gradually unlocked through the game. The combat system is simple and intuitive, and mainly limited to various two-button combos - even the most complex-looking moves are fairly easy to pull off after a couple of attempts. And although there's a monumental pile-up of twisted metal and explosions on screen practically all the time, there nevertheless remains a certain method to all this madness, and the action is never too overbearing or confusing. Quick attacks can be reeled off with almost no effort whatsoever, while the more complex moves can be tested in the sandbox training area (where the game's tutorial takes place, inside a Hulk simulator no less).
Weapons play another massive part of the game, and one that adds a huge amount of depth to the everyday action, and of course the constant destruction. By grabbing a passing car, coach or lorry, the Hulk can mash and mould them to his advantage. Using his amateur metal shop skills, Hulk can fashion entire cars into steel fists to pound buildings and enemies into dust. Buses can be used as makeshift shields/battering rams/skateboards, and mobile missile trucks become the Hulk's own personal RPG launchers, with which to fling a deadly salvo of rockets at enemies in a firestorm of destructive mayhem. It's brilliant fun.
Aptly, Banner's attack strength is governed by his mental state, which ranges from mildly insane to outraged and furious. Players are actively encouraged to destroy more objects to get the big boy madder still, making sure they get the full benefit of the Hulk's capabilities, Once you've accumulated enough Smash points to fill your Smash meter, the Hulk reaches anger meltdown, - any enemies in the area will want to get the frick out of town when the green guy goes berserk. These special attacks need to be charged up by holding down the X and Y buttons, but once you do, the Hulk unleashes a huge wave of destruction that'll flatten everything within a city block. Awesome.
The camera occasionally has issues during the more hectic fights - when the Hulk needs to switch direction quickly, particularly during boss battles, it will often rotate at an annoyingly slow rate. That said, considering the sheer amount of stuff going on on-screen at any one time, there's hardly any slowdown at all.
It's hard to describe the feeling you get playing Ultimate Destruction. Rather than dishing out Asbos to delinquent kids who go on car-trashing rampages of destruction, the government should sit them down and make them play this for a day or two. Such is the relentless violence of this game, any destructive urges will soon be exhausted on the poor pixellated inhabitants of the Hulk's world. Sure, it may be worryingly sadistic to grab a passing bus full of schoolkids and use it as a shield to batter a fleet of police cars out of the way, before hurling it into a group of passing pedestrians, but when it's this much fun, who cares? Super, smashing, and most definitely great.
THE INCREDIBLES
Slickly presented and generally true to the film, but there really isn't enough variation to entertain you for long
Action adventure - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 6.2/10
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TQ04002E)
Incred.txtRead Review
Another hit comedy animation from Pixar, another uninspiring videogame tie-in for unsuspecting consumers to waste their money on. Actually, maybe that's a little bit harsh, as while The Incredibles (which follows the exploits of a family of superheroes who must come out of retirement to save the world) doesn't exactly excel in the originality stakes, it does manage to entertain you just about enough to warrant a modicum of praise and avoid a torrent of scorn.
Each mission of this action-adventure has been designed around the unique superpowers of each Incredible. First off is the father - Mr Incredible - an aging man-boobed powerhouse with a jaw you could forge metal on, whose tasks generally involve hammering evil henchmen into submission and smashing the scenery to pieces. Enemies are numerous but unintelligent, with even the largest punch-ups easily winnable with an unsubtle blend of frantic button hammering and jumping.
His wife, Mrs Incredible, has the ability to extend her arms to great distances and swing from far-off objects, and as a result her levels take on a far more platform-based and thoughtful format than her husband's fistfight-filled escapades.
Next up is son Dash, who's not only blessed with lightning speed, but also some of the game's best moments, during which your reactions will be tested to the max. By comparison though, his sister Violet's adventures prove both uninspiring and frustrating. Slow-paced and utilising her ability to become invisible for short periods of time, these could have provided the perfect respite from the frenetic energy of Dash's manic missions, but instead are just plain irritating.
With four different heroes and an array of superpowers at your disposal, the first couple of hours of The Incredibles prove charmingly entertaining, if a little overly simplistic. The slick presentation and colourful backdrops provide a rollicking ride of humorous escapism, but then repetition starts to take a hold like a leech on a festering wound. You start to realise you're just ploughing your way through a series of identikit levels while futilely struggling with the hideously erratic camera controls.
Sure, The Incredibles is fun in bursts, it's generally true to the film, ticks all of the boxes when it comes to slickness and presentation and even allows you to download more Battle Areas, but that can't detract from the fact that there simply isn't enough here to keep most of you interested for very long. If you're under ten or still enjoy watching Tom and Jerry double bills then by all means check it out, but if you're anybody else, then it's probably best to leave this one be.
THE INCREDIBLES: RISE OF THE UNDERMINER
Stupid platforming cash-in with none of the charm or charachterisation of the Pixar movies
Action - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 5.0/10
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Incredibles.txtRead Review
Remember the end of The Incredibles when mole-man The Underminer exploded from the ground? Kinda set up the way for a sequel, didn't it? But what's this? We get a ropey old platformer instead? For shame.
Forgetting his son Dash's running achievements, Mr Incredible bounds off with Frozone to thwart all manner of preprogrammed, randomly spawning robots... under the ground! Cue plenty of bland set-pieces, silly game mechanics and naff RPG elements. Use your super-lift as Mr Incredible, but only within predefined spots; listen to Frozone tell Mr Incredible to lift up frozen robots, then watch as he just stands around. Incredible.
As for the rest of the Incredi-clan? Forget it. You'll be so 'enthralled' by level upon level of drilling robots and darkness you won't give a crap. Okay, so there are a few brief moments of interest. You can switch between characters at random to combine their strengths - although for some reason Frozone is a stronger, far more useful character than Mr Incredible himself.
So there you are! Underground and underwhelming, it's a shame none of that Pixar magic rubbed off on this.
THE ITALIAN JOB: L.A. HEIST
Easy to pick up and play, but the story's dull and the maps are boring
Driving - Issue 21 (October 2003) - 5.0/10
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ES01401E)
TheItalian.txtRead Review
Is nothing sacred? The British institution that is The Italian Job gets an American reworking, with the streets of Rome transformed into the urban sprawl of L.A. and the enigmatic Michael Caine substituted for Mark Wahlberg - most famous for having a long schlong in Boogie Nights. We'll have to reserve judgement and climb down from our cinematic soapbox because we haven't seen the film, but if the movie mirrors the quality of this game then we won't be booking front row seats any time soon.
Any notion of playing a suspense-laden heist-inspired driving caper needs to filed away until the likes of Driver appears next year. What you get here is an identikit arcade racer that leans more towards Midtown Madness 3 (Issue 18, 7.3) than any crime-ridden spree. But while Midtown succeeds through imaginative maps, humorous characters and the excellent Xbox Live functionality, Italian Job just doesn't deliver.
Story mode involves numerous missions that replicate the movie narrative - in so much as you get treated to a budget cutscene prior to engaging in the very typical racing objectives. The action is pretty much all against the clock, getting from A to B before the time runs out while trying to work out where the hell you need to go on a very basic radar that promotes trial and error rather than any confident navigational skills. It's a shame that GPS doesn't come as standard.
The bland racing action could be forgiven if the game didn't look so bloody basic. There's no atmosphere to the environment. It doesn't feel like L.A. - it feels like Milton Keynes with palm trees and, fair enough, we know that nobody walks anywhere in the City of Angels, but we could at least see a few pedestrians to make it feel like it's a populated city. The traffic is just as bad, with little vehicle variation and collisions that a) produce no noticeable car damage and b) always generate the same type of generic rubble on impact. No windscreens smashing, no bumpers hanging precariously from the car, no dents in the bodywork. Just a puff of smoke occasionally emitting from the engine. Big deal.
Story mode is supported by a circuit race that can cater for two players and a mildly diverting stunt section that's reminiscent of the tower challenges in ATV Quad Power Racing 2 (Issue 13, 7.7) but overall, this is another example of a film licence that's got great potential yet fails to really deliver. An Italian Job that isn't particularly worth applying for.
THE LOTR: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING
A half-decent and smart-looking stab at the Rings world
Action adventure - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 7.0/10
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VV00501E)
TheLord1.txtRead Review
Back in the summer of 1930, an Oxford University professor called Tolkien began writing a tale about a little creature he called a Hobbit. He probably wasn't banking on his fantasy stories one day evolving into a worldwide phenomenon, but there you go.
It's a funny old world, and so is that of Middle Earth, the home of the Hobbits and all the other creations that grew in the fertile grounds of Tolkien's imagination.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring is an action/adventure game based on Tolkien's literary work, rather than the film adaptations. It focuses specifically on the first book of the celebrated trilogy, with Frodo, Aragorn, Gandalf and friends on a quest to protect The One Ring from the big bad guy, dark lord Sauron.
The action, relatively simple and stat-free fantasy wandering, begins in The Shire, with Frodo needing to transfer the deeds of Bilbo Baggins's home Bag End and collect the ring before he begins his quest.
Characters casually stroll around Hobbiton (Frodo's home village), and once engaged in conversation, tend to offer sub-quests. These sub-quests are optional to the main plot and have a tendency to expand once the initial tasks are completed.
The tasks are, for want of a better word, gentle. Rounding up pigs for a farmer, helping an elderly postman to obtain his "medicinal herbs" and getting the ingredients for Fatty's pies are low-impact pursuits. They offer an alternative to the more stereotypical fantasy challenges and actually do a great job of easing you into the pace and priorities of the location.
The major incentive for performing sub-quests and narrative-based missions is to increase your karma level. You begin with a full quota of karma but if you do anything morally wrong (like wearing the ring too much, attacking innocent animals or taking neighbours' possessions) you lose karma. And if too much of the vital stuff is lost, your quest fails.
Wearing the ring has two benefits. You become invisible - useful for dodging most enemies - and you also gain the ability to detect previously hidden secret areas.
As a game mechanic this works well, encouraging you to deplete your karma in order to explore new areas and, as a result, to engage in more tasks to replenish it.
Although starting as Frodo, as you progress through the quest you also get to play as Aragorn and Gandalf. Each character has particular attributes: Aragorn is more than a bit useful with the bow, and he carries a sword a great deal more satisfying than Frodo's girly twig of a walking stick.
But Gandalf is the daddy, with more tricks up his sleeve than David Blaine and Paul Daniels squished together - an ugly, yet somehow appealing thought.
The game world on the whole looks very attractive, and when combined with fitting music and above-average voice acting, it sets the tone and authenticity of a Middle Earth experience more than adequately.
The game is a long one. Expanding sub-quests, combined with many and varied mission objectives and the added exploration of secret areas (via the ring) could well provide more hours of entertainment than reading the entire trilogy back to back.
But if it were all rainbows and roses then this game would have a shiny Elite badge on the front of the review. That it doesn't is down to the flawed gameplay - flawed to the point of pad-throwing frustration.
Combat, a major part of this title, is a repetitive and unrewarding experience hampered by cumbersome controls and offering little variety. Weapons and magic have to be selected via a click-through icon, which means you're often getting pounded while you pick the right tool for the job.
The game is also too basic in areas that Xbox can easily improve. Many inviting locations can't be entered, an annoyance gamers have had to put up with over the years as a result of platform limitations. To not then take advantage of a cutting-edge console possessing the power for huge worlds is an oversight.
You're also stuck on a very linear path that must be travelled in order to progress through the game. As such, there's little feeling of going on a journey; more like you're on a conveyor belt chugging from one location to the next. Gameplay immersion is demanded by an ever-increasing number of players that want to feel that they have the freedom to explore.
And with a game based on one of the most interesting fantasy worlds ever created, it's a shame you can't stray more from the beaten path and really feel part of Tolkien's world.
"Be wary, noble traveller. The scenery might be lovely, but the journey through LOTR: FOTR may be tedious, and may be a little simple for your fantasy gaming tastes."
THE LOTR: THE RETURN OF THE KING
Recreates the film beautifully. A blockbuster action game
Action - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 8.5/10
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EA06202E)
TheLord3.txtRead Review
Big name licence conversions - and they don't get much bigger than the Lord of the Rings series - are very much a double-edged sword, if you pardon the pun. On the one hand developers are spared the difficult challenge of having to actually come
up with a decent idea for a game, but the flip side is the huge responsibility of having to deliver an authentic experience to a market that will already be familiar with the story and have high expectations.
Licence games are a notoriously fickle bunch, but when a conversion occasionally succeeds it not only provides a decent game but also a good complement to the existing subject matter. That's exactly what you get with The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers - a great game that captures the spirit of Tolkien's world combined with lots of additional extras for fans of the series.
Unlike the previous adventure-style antics of The Lord Of The Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (Issue 10, 7.0), The Two Towers is very much of the hack and slash variety. The title takes you through the best parts of both movies in a slugfest of Orc slaying and monster mashing.
The opening sequence is a good example of how the game unfolds. There's no standard introduction screen with list of options; instead you're presented with cinematics from the opening battle in the first film, explaining the history of the ring (which, if you've been living under a rock recently, grants its wearer ultimate power). The epic film sequence seamlessly merges into in-game graphics and places you in the heart of the fighting in a training sequence that is both quite novel and also great fun.
It's this blend of film footage combined with the actual gameplay that gives The Two Towers a great pace and an illusion that you are actually playing through the film's story rather than just indulging in a few isolated episodes. You get to play as one of three central characters - Aragorn the swashbuckling swordsman, Gimli the dwarf axeman, or Legolas the twin knife-wielding elf. You can select whichever character you wish at the start of each level throughout the game, which is useful as their attributes can be better suited to different missions.
As you progress through the game you will gain experience points for completing a level and chaining combos together to hit multiple foes. These points have a dual purpose. Firstly, they convert into upgrade points that allow you to purchase a wide range of attacks, combos, or better health and armour. And secondly, as you gain more experience points your character will also increase in level. Each level has its own range of attributes that can be purchased, thus ensuring your upgrade catalogue is chunky enough to rival Argos's.
The control is easy enough, although initially it may seem like it's an exercise in frantic button-bashing. But after purchasing a few combos (which normally involve two buttons and the occasional trigger), the fighting style becomes more refined, which is necessary when taking on some of the harder foes that require parrying and dodging as well as hacking and slashing.
The only real downfall of The Lord Of The Rings: The Two Towers is the brevity
of the game combined with the linearity of gameplay. There are only 12 levels, some of which can be too quick to finish, and it's very much a 'straight path' game with invisible walls lurking everywhere and very clear mission objectives that can't be diverted from. This naturally limits replay value, but the desire to build up each of your characters coupled with three difficulty settings will encourage further play.
As a package, The Two Towers captures the epic feel of the films and subsequently delivers an authentic licence conversion. The graphics are good, with detailed texture and lighting effects and no slowdown even when there's lots happening on screen. The orchestral soundtrack serves to enhance the action, especially when it builds to crescendo in the heat of battle. You'll really feel like you're part of the Fellowship, and this is the most fun you can have with swords without causing yourself a nasty injury.
THE LOTR: THE THIRD AGE
Sadly not the RPG to rule them all; just a good game that blends a turn-based fight system with the classic story
Action adventure - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 7.4/10
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ThirdAge.txtRead Review
After striking licensing gold with The Two Towers (Issue 14, 8.0) and Return of the King (Issue 23, 8.5), EA is going for an assault on the charts with an RPG based around the events of the movie trilogy. Previous games allowed you to play as members of the Fellowship, but The Third Age takes a slightly different path to the orc-infested wastelands of Mordor.
Although you don't get to play as the famed Fellowship members, they do pop up in very important battles (The Balrog, Helm's Deep, Pelennor Fields) to lend an axe, staff or bow to your party. Instead, you play the role of Gondor warrior Berethor, who sets out to locate Boromir. Along the way, elves, rangers, dwarves, Rohan warriors and many more will join your quest. Gandalf actor Sir Ian McKellen has provided an excellent narrative that keeps you updated on where in the story you are. But if you're familiar with the movies or the books, you'll have heard it all before.
The Third Age is essentially an adventure within an adventure. While Frodo and co are off dealing with matters of the ring, Berethor is chasing the Fellowship through Middle-earth, mopping up what the Fellowship leaves behind. There are lots of orcs to clear out of villages, lots of soldiers to round up for the Helm's Deep battle and lots of Uruk-hai to waste in Osgiliath. At one point or another you'll see just about every foe Tolkien wrote about and Peter Jackson filmed. There are a few twists and turns in the story - some that may well have the beards up in arms - but it'd be rude to give them away here.
With around 40 hours of gameplay to wade though, you'll spend some of your 'precious' time wandering the land, but mostly you'll be involved in turn-based battles. If you're familiar with the Final Fantasy style of turn-based combat then you'll know what to expect here. You take a turn to attack enemies or heal a member of your party, and then they do. And then you do. And then they do. It might not sound much on paper, but with the dizzying effects and cracking score taken from the films, it all adds up to a very enjoyable experience.
The Third Age feels as though it's been knocked together quite quickly. Many areas will be familiar to those who have played EA's previous titles, though the main characters don't look or sound themselves here. And because it's an RPG, there are loads of power-ups, spells, items and melee attacks to master. Your main inventory screen allows you to pick and choose your armour and weapons, while a scaled-down version lets you flick between spells and attacks during combat. Don't worry though, it sounds more complicated than it is and the interface is very simple to use. So much so that you won't notice it's there half the time.
But what does let the game down a little is the number of these turn-based random battles you have to get through to advance further. Parts of the game are open for a little linear exploration with a random encounter every now and again, but enclosed dungeon areas like the Mines of Moria will bog you down with battle after battle. It's especially frustrating when you want to get on and search for certain objects, but have to go through samey-looking battles every few minutes. When it all kicks off at Helm's Deep you have a series of brutal encounters with no save points to be seen anywhere. Some form of checkpoint in these areas wouldn't have gone amiss at all.
The Third Age stays faithful to the movie licence and dishes up hour upon hour of orc-slaying fun. It's not really doing anything new as far as RPGs go but, what it does do, it does well.
THE LOTR: THE TWO TOWERS
Great. Captures the spirit of Tolkien's world. Lots of extras for fans
Action adventure - Issue 14 (March 2003) - 8.0/10
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TheLord2.txtRead Review
Galadriel describes the broken enemy, over movie footage of the battle for Helm's Deep. On the fifth day, Gandalf the White appears under a brilliant light with the Riders of Rohan. They charge down the hillside and meet the army of Isengard head on at the bottom. Movie instantly becomes game as you control Gandalf at the foot of the wall while war rages around you. Legolas calls for help as the camera swoops across the top of the wall. You hack your way through the Uruk-hai as fireballs pelt the ground causing total devastation in their wake. You scale the enemy's ladder and use lightning bolts to take out the orc archers.
Aragorn warns the gates are in danger of being breached. You descend the ladder, and fire the enemy's own catapult at them as they smash their way into Helm's Deep. On your third attempt you strike the battering ram and it explodes, taking the enemy with it. Gandalf raises his staff in victory as a paralysing white light engulfs the valley. Back to the movie and the Fellowship (minus Sam and Frodo) look towards the fire in the sky that covers Mordor...
This is the incredible opening level of a game that, once it's got both hands around your neck, refuses to let go for an instant. Everything described above comes at you, one thing after another with no loading screens, vocals supplied by actual actors, and music and sounds ripped directly from the upcoming film's third and final part of Tolkien's mighty trilogy.
Once you've got your breath back after the mesmerising intro, you get whisked off to a screen that tells you how many experience points your slaying earned you and, more importantly, what upgrades to your character you can buy with these points. There are several different upgrades for each level of experience you reach. The higher the level of experience you're at, the stronger the powers and abilities on offer are. Unfortunately they're more expensive too, but that's the economy in games for you. You can choose to upgrade the character you just finished playing the level with, or upgrade your entire party. But this obviously costs a packet.
After the battle for Helm's Deep is over, you're taken through to a ladder that allows you to choose which way to go through the adventure next. There are 12 levels in all, each telling the story of the eight playable characters of the Fellowship in their battle to free Middle-Earth from the clutches of the evil Saruman. Just like the book really. The first four offer a recap about where the Fellowship is up to in its attempt to destroy the One Ring. You get to basically play the Two Towers movie and game from a different perspective, before diving straight into the third instalment.
But what really sets Return of the King apart from all the other big movie licensed games knocking about, is the fact that it captures its source so well. Enter the Matrix (Issue 17, 8.5) pales in comparison to this beast. The visuals are truly jaw-dropping, and there's so much movement happening on screen at the same time, it conveys the feeling that you're actually in the middle of this immense battle. Ents stomp around crushing orcs with their huge tree-trunk feet, while the Nazgul comb the skies looking for the ring bearer. It's a level of visual excellence that captures the feel of the movies and books so aptly you'll want to cry with joy.
There's nothing really revolutionary in terms of gameplay, as the meat and veg of the action is just swinging melee weapons around your head faster than a cadet swings her baton. Each button performs a different attack or special ability that you really do need to know, as this is endurance gaming at its best. Imagine standing in front of an army of 10,000, and then imagine ploughing your way through them in levels that can last in excess of 20 minutes because the enemy just won't give in. It's relentless and your wrists will ache, but it's worth every swing.
Because the movie isn't out yet, sitting through snippets of actual footage was hard. We didn't want to spoil the film for ourselves, but it's virtually impossible to tear your eyes away from the screen. The transition from game to film and back again is remarkable. If you played through EA's first game, The Two Towers (Issue 14, 8.0), you'll know what we're talking about. Return of the King is a blockbuster of an action game in every sense of the word. The sights are mind-blowing, as are the sounds - if you have access to a surround sound system, this is what it was made for. There's so much going on it's almost too much to cope with. Buy it now if you don't mind seeing a lot of the unreleased film. Otherwise wait until you have watched it. But whatever you do, don't miss it.
THE MATRIX: PATH OF NEO
The Matrix game we should have had back in 2003. The most in-depth use of a movie licence in ages
Action Adventure - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 8.5/10
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MatrixPON.txtRead Review
Despite the fact 2003's Enter the Matrix (Issue 17, 8.5) has since been largely sneered at, it still managed to shift over three million copies, something not to be sniffed at. Yet Shiny and Atari are all too aware of the fact that the game played and looked like it was rushed out just so its release could coincide with the equally disappointing The Matrix Reloaded.
The most damning aspect of Enter the Matrix was a simple one - you couldn't play as the film's hero, Neo. Now, two years later, Shiny has returned to the world of gravity-defying combat and bullet ballet with Path of Neo. From the outset it becomes apparent that someone's attempting to exorcise demons from the past. Presentation is top-notch, menu screens are inventive, and the sound will make your ears bleed. The key cast from the film handed over their likenesses, so there's no fear of having an entirely new Matrix gang comprised of complete unknowns parading around either.
Narrating the story by splicing scenes from the film, you're presented with the option of taking either the blue pill or the red pill at the game's outset. Oddly enough, you can opt to take the blue pill, whereby Neo wakes up at his computer and the game simply ends. Certainly the shortest gaming experience we've ever had.
Alternatively, choosing the red pill catapults you into the game and the first mission, a dream sequence played out in Neo's head whereby you brawl against wave after wave of enemies in order to gauge your difficulty level and showcase some of the moves Neo will eventually be able to execute. From here the action shifts to the office sequence from the first film, with Agents in pursuit of a sneaking Neo. It's stealthy, but without too much emphasis on remaining invisible all the time. You can easily make a break for doors here, unlike say, Splinter Cell, where you'd be spotted straight away.
Once the real fighting kicks in, things start to get really juicy. That said, be prepared to persevere with the sheer level of combat techniques and initially confusing button combinations required to pull off some of the flashier moves. Scrapping with multiple enemies involves lots of flicking the Left stick towards an enemy followed by endless series of button hits. Get the hang of that and you can start adding Focus power by way of the Left trigger to ramp up the ferocity of the attacks and allow for some very cool moves indeed. Best of these is the one where Neo runs up an enemy and follows through with a wrecking ball kick to the head. However, we did find moments where the buttons we hit seemed to have no bearing on the moves happening on screen.
What works in the game's favour are the meaty RPG elements - the further you progress, the more moves and abilities you unlock for future battles with the hard-as-nails Agents. The temptation to just button-bash is removed, and you're encouraged to hone your skills to the point where enemies don't even get a chance to raise a fist. It's all been painstakingly planned down to the last detail to ensure the best possible Matrix experience to date.
One frustrating aspect is the camera. Fights can get furious, especially if you're surrounded by a number of enemies, and it's not unknown for the camera to jar, leaving you open to an attack from an off-screen enemy. But it does the job most of the time. If anything we're more disappointed about the slightly basic character models.
But anyway. Fans of the first game won't believe the treat Atari's dished up, and anyone looking for a hugely impressive brawler fused with a great story and lots of guns will find everything they want. If nothing else, this is a vast improvement - it undoubtedly is The One.
THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS: OOGIE'S REVENGE
A quirky tie-in actioner with a good sense of humour and some great songs!
Action - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 6.8/10
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Nightmare.txtRead Review
It's a testament to the imagination of Tim Burton that his visionary, twisted fairytale The Nightmare Before Christmas still stands up to repeated viewings nearly 12 years after its release. We doubt people will still be talking about this tie-in in 2017, but hey, it's not that bad.
Picking up seamlessly where the film left off, Jack the Pumpkin King is back in Halloweentown, and all, typically, is not well. Oogie Boogie is back too (though no explanation is given for his return) and the town's freaky inhabitants are in a state of disarray. Or something. As expected for a movie tie-in, the game follows the generic, easy-on-the-brain action template, but with a few very cool flourishes that salvage it from being just another cash-in.
Jack's ecto-tastic rubber whip is a novel weapon, and makes battering enemies a right laugh. Building up combos and juggling an opponent mid-air is dead simple, and hauling them in, wielding them like a lifeless lasso before hurling them into an advancing bag of bones is both satisfying and extremely cool. Combat is actually very solid; for a supposed kids' game the action is punishingly tough and challenging.
The songs, although ripped directly from the film, are still fresh and toe-tappingly great. They're not just there for fancy window-dressing either. Several stages involve Jack building up his music meter (through combat and successful combos on opponents), and then facing off for a dance-off with Oogie himself. A familiar Dance Dance Revolution-style mini-game, the difficulty is significantly tougher than the easy-going ride we thought it would be. That said, it's a welcome break from the relentless, frenzied whipping you slog through in the game world proper, and there's blood, sweat and battered thumb-skin on the dancefloor once you've finished.
Each region is easily reachable from the central hub, and as Jack's combat abilities are progressively upgraded, you're encouraged to revisit completed areas and unlock the wealth of secrets and extras. It's a shame the front-end menus don't reflect this simplicity; they're slow, clunky and both confusing and infuriating to navigate, especially when you're in a hurry to whip out that health restoring elixir.
Although the songs may be faithful to the film, the voice of Jack Skellington isn't, and as such it feels odd to try and relate to the skinless charlatan. Annoyingly, there's no instant save option, and what save points there are (although comically represented by the Three Mr Hydes) are few and far between. Because of Jack's meagre health and inability to take a lot of damage, it's very frustrating to replay the same large chunks of level over and over again. An easy-going and fun actioner that sadly lacks the finesse of the original film.
THE PUNISHER
Not a great deal of depth, but as a full-on, in-yer-face blaster, it's very good
Screenshots - Action - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 8.4/10
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Punish.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




If you're the kind of person who's unlikely to look past a name, you should already know what to expect here. The Punisher? Hmm, let's think... Driving over terrorists' necks in forklift trucks? Check. Dunking mobsters' heads in piranha pools? Check. Feeding henchmen into sausage machines? Check. In fact, the only 'punishment' concept avoided here is the one of the six-foot, latex-clad, thigh-booted, whip-wielding variety, but then we never did manage to unlock that secret mode...
The Punisher, as you'll already know, is quite violent. But tongue-in-cheekedly so. It's basically Max Payne 2 (Issue 25, 9.2) with all the brutally imaginative interrogations from the Bond films. And then some. You get explosive, frenetic third-person shooter action featuring gun battles so majestic John Woo would feel a tingle in the naughties. You get up-close, melee executions featuring machetes, rifle butts and swords. You get body counts higher than pouring boiling water into an ants' nest. It's one of the most fun, juvenile, intense action experiences since, well, Max Payne 2.
The gameplay isn't new, but it's programmed very well. Even occasional AI quibbles only intensify the comic book sensation. You essentially kick down a door, engage in relentless firefights, grab aggressors and then look for unique ways to extract information. Stealth, inevitably, is largely redundant. Using enemies as human shields and rolling behind cover, however, is imperative. There are numerous firearms to employ and, keeping the action flowing super-smooth, loading time is at a minimum.
Of course, at The Punisher's core are the infamous 'interrogations'. Designated areas allow you to question foes in return for health, information and guidance, resorting to a simple Right analogue balancing game. Car compactors, shark-infested waters, furnaces, funeral-home incinerators and laser-cutters all become viable administrators of pain, culminating in an (optional) gratuitous death sequence that, thanks to the ratings board, unfolds in distorted black and white. Alternatively, there are the environmental killings, like pressing X to mount a screaming adversary on an elephant tusk. Ouch.
With plenty of unlockables, several difficulty levels and downloadable goodies, The Punisher's repeat-play potential is surprisingly high. Each level is varied, looks fantastic, and features cameos from the likes of DareDevil, Nick Fury and Black Widow. As a pretentious-free, rollercoaster ride through arcade mayhem, The Punisher is one of the finest uses of a licence to date. And it isn't directly based on last year's shoddy movie either.
THE SIMPSONS: HIT & RUN
GTAIII meets Burnout 2 all wrapped up in a Simpsons fan-fest package
Driving - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 8.0/10
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TheSimpsons1.txtRead Review
It's a testament to the quality of The Simpsons that not only is it the longest-running cartoon series on TV, but also the most successful comedy show of all time. So it's unfortunate that games based on this fantastic licence have been a big disappointment. Until now.
It seems Homer and co have a penchant for tearing around Springfield in all manner of vehicles, only this time things have been considerably moved up a gear (ahem). Every conceivable contraption that you've ever seen is here, from Otto's schoolbus to Lisa's Malibu Stacy car. The game follows a bizarre storyline, kicking off with the appearance of strange surveillance wasps all over town and, after Bart disappears, things take a turn for the surreal.
After a basic tutorial level, the real genius of the game strikes home. Along with a frantically paced driving game, you get the opportunity to get out of your vehicle and explore Springfield on foot. The whole town. Anywhere you like.
Not unlike another famous driving/running/ exploring title, violence is at the forefront of the game's third-person aspect. Players can attack and smash any nearby people or objects, and hijack passing vehicles. Springfield is faithfully recreated here - you'll instantly recognise all the locations that serve as backdrops for the
mission-based tasks, which mostly involve beating the clock or collecting items in a set time.
The humour is perfectly captured here, with plenty of in-jokes and characteristic dialogue. Along with controlling Homer, Bart, Lisa, Marge and Apu, practically every Simpsons character ever created is here, and all play an integral
part in the story. All the original actors do the voice-overs too, which adds to the authenticity.
As with all platformers, collecting things is the Krusty Burger order of the day, and amassing hordes of gold coins will let you purchase new cars and outfits relating to each character. Look out for the sets of collectors packs too, which, when completed, give access to bonus games and nuggets of real episodes. All very interesting for comic book store guys and the like.
After a while some of the driving missions feel a bit samey, and repeating a failed task can be more boring than one of Skinner's lessons. The camera is a bit limited on the platform side of the game too, often forcing you to take a blind leap of faith into unseen areas, but apart from that, Hit & Run is a tidy little game that finally does a great licence justice.
THE SIMPSONS: ROAD RAGE
A game made bearable by funny voices and two-player mode
Driving - Issue 3 (May 2002) - 5.9/10
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TheSimpsons2.txtRead Review
The Simpsons cartoon is the best thing ever on TV. Crazy Taxi is a classic arcade game from Sega. Combine the two and, due to the unfathomable laws of video game mathematics, you'll get something far less than the sum of these parts.
In The Simpsons Road Rage, you choose one of 17 collectable characters and drive around Springfield taking other characters to their destination as quickly as possible. The faster you do it, the more money and time you get, while bonus cash is available for additional tasks like driving carefully or smashing stuff up.
It's practically an exact copy of Crazy Taxi's winning formula, but while it's a perfectly playable game, the subtle gameplay tricks of Sega's worthy arcade title have melted away.
It's too simple to drive - the cars accelerate almost instantly, hardly ever lose traction and you can drive drive straight through most traffic flows without smashes. There's no real skill in navigating around Springfield either, since arrows show you exactly which roads to take. And there isn't anything more to it than that - you just drive from one destination to the next until you run out of time.
The best thing about the game, and the main reason that anyone would want to play it, is the Simpsons connection. And while the stupidly basic graphics capture the essence of the cartoon (but in 3D), it's the sounds that work best. All characters have a bunch of (mostly) amusing quips that they freely reel off, and while this is initially enough to make you hunt down favourites, they quickly lose their charm with extended play.
With long loading times to top everything off, The Simpsons Road Rage feels a little too outdated, knocked-out and lazy. Fans of the show will get a full evening's enjoyment from it, but it's certainly not worth buying at full price.
THE SIMS
No visceral action but it's satisfying controlling little people's destinies
World builder - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 7.7/10
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TheSims.txtRead Review
Convention dictates that shooting, scoring and stealth are things that equal gaming fun. The Sims, uniquely, prefers you to wash, cook and clean. It's a game that, by ignoring such convention, has met with incredible success on other formats. What chance does The Sims have on Xbox? A pretty good one actually, as long as you remember a few basic tenets: keep your virtual people happy, healthy and close to a toilet. Yes, bladder control rather than Bullet Time is the order of the day.
The Sims is the biggest-selling PC game ever, and comes to Xbox with a reputation of entertaining pointlessness. Players can, and do, play for days without any achievable aim. A freedom that was responsible for much of the game's success. Aware that console gamers tend to like their action a little more focused, EA has included the first ever 'winnable' Sims game. This Get a Life mode sets you a number of challenges as you strive to reach the pinnacle of wealth and success.
As you progress you'll unlock new furniture and other goodies - including the open-ended Sandbox mode of the original - which may bring out the Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen in you. That is, of course, if you can stomach the controls. A controller will never be as accurate as a mouse and, while the pointer works well enough, it can get fiddly, especially when designing your home. Luckily the camera behaves and shows off the fully 3D visuals - a first for the series.
The initial Create mode is fun, even if the characterisation is overly Americanised. You can go for the preppy or skateboard look, but forget about becoming Beckham. You do begin to care about your character though, especially when you've dragged him from dishwashing loser to hot tub lothario. And then there's the two-player option, with head-to-head flirting and friendship-making challenges. Co-op isn't bad either, and probably a good way to get your non-gaming buddies, especially girls, interested in your Xbox.
But, despite some exclusive objects, the flaws of the PC game are replicated here. The constant micro-management of your character can become too much, while often time can't be sped up fast enough, leaving you spending thrill-free minutes watching your Sim sleep.
The Sims is the biggest 'Marmite' game ever, polarising opinions everywhere. It lacks visceral action but there is something satisfying about controlling the little computer people's destinies. The structured gameplay and better visuals make the Xbox version more welcoming than the PC original, and worth a look if you fancy something a little different.
THE SIMS BUSTIN' OUT
Still inexplicably addictive voyeurism. If you do like The Sims, you'll be utterly hooked
World builder - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 7.8/10
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TheSims2.txtRead Review
One of the biggest lures of the seemingly endless PC expansion packs for The Sims is the ability to get your characters out of the house and take them into new environments, because even virtual people need new faces and a bit of retail therapy now and again. This is what Maxis has also tried to achieve in Bustin' Out, the first console sequel to its phenomenally popular virtual dolls house series.
The developer has polished up the initial character creation system, and your Sims look much more realistic, especially their facial expressions, even though most of the clothing options make them look like rejects from a Britney Spears video. You fly the nest at the start of the game and leave mum's (sorry, mom's) home cooking behind to embark on one of seven new careers, many of which will require you to move into different houses in the area. Of course, there's always the option of moving back in with the old dear if the bills become too much.
As well as new locations, including a gym, the Shiny Things science laboratory and a gothic mansion (complete with ghosts and man-eating plants) you can interact with many characters like the party animal Bing Bling and the fitness freak Goldie Toane, who help you to unlock goals and social skills. Dudley from the original game is also back and still making the cast of Men Behaving Badly seem positively refined.
Let's face it, if you're not a fan of The Sims games by now then this isn't going to convert you, although the console versions of the titles do have a much stronger emphasis on gameplay over mere interior design. The different careers and locations mean that Bustin' Out has more longevity that its predecessor, although the lack of an online mode (as with most EA Xbox games) is a real shame.
As you would expect, the visuals really do stand out on the Xbox and even though you can't shoot anything (although you may occasionally want to), the peaceful yet cerebral gameplay is challenging and surprisingly addictive.
THE SIMS 2
The little people are back, this time with proper console controls!
World builder - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 8.5/10
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Sims2.txtRead Review
Being a Sim used to be hard work. It was all hanging around being directed by a disembodied cursor waiting for permission to do things such as squat over the toilet, or get dressed. It was undignified. And then, one sunny day in Sim-land, somebody decided it was time to get away from the game's PC roots and become a proper console conversion. Out went the cursor-clicking, in came third-person direct control, and with it the whole shebang went into orbit. The Sims 2, believe it or not, is action-packed.
Yup, in this new instalment you can build a wave machine in the back garden, become a mad scientist and get abducted by aliens, or even just die, then come back and haunt everyone. All this is more than helped along by the new interaction system, which now lets you simply walk up to an item and use it. No more fiddly interfaces, no more pointing and clicking - it's all properly intuitive, making tasks that much easier to perform. You won't feel like you're spinning plates in The Sims 2.
There's also a new aspiration, exclusive to Xbox - alongside the usual Wealth, Popularity, Romance, and Knowledge, EA has introduced Creativity, which means a lot more Sim tasks based on cooking good meals, writing books, painting pictures, or acting. You can learn recipes then cook meals for friends (or poison your enemies). Of course, the size of your fridge dictates how many items of food you can store, so you'll have to work hard to obtain the goodies on offer. There are some 250 different items that can be bought and interacted with - plus a further 250 items of clothing, making for some 15 million different clothing combinations.
The idea of seeing your Sim through birth, parenthood, middle age, death (and beyond!) from the PC version of Sims 2 hasn't been included for the Xbox version, though, which is a shame. But it's still the most adaptable Sims game yet. You can customise your Sims right down to their eye colour or facial shape, and if you tire of the norm of home-making, career-chasing and hot-tubbing, you can always starve to death then haunt the living to please SimDeath. Do his bidding, and he'll return your Sim to life.
Sims fans will have wondered where the hell a series that encompasses pretty much everything in real life already could actually go in the sequel. Well, The Sims 2 has not only gone to those strange new worlds (fry your food and you'll become less healthy!) but beyond. Travel through time, die, do whatever the hell you like - just make sure you go to the toilet regularly and mop up the inexplicable heaps of trash that accumulate everywhere. It's the same old Sims, and yet so utterly different. Draw the blinds and say goodbye to your friends - real life doesn't get any better than this!
THE SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS MOVIE
Leaking charm from every pore, 'Bob looks and sounds fantastic, but isn't absorbing enough to retain our interest
Screenshots - Platformer - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 6.5/10
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SpongeMovie.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




SpongeBob SquarePants has become of a cult hit on both sides of the pond (and with a name like that, why the hell not?) over the last few years. His big screen debut comes complete with assorted Hollywood cameos and the obligatory game tie-in, and it's a damn funny one.
Players take control of both the short-trousered soaker-upper and his dozy mate Patrick, as, true to the film, they head to Shell City to retrieve Neptune's crown and stop evil Plankton brainwashing the sea's inhabitants with his mind control hats. Quite. As per the show, the game features tons of comical dialogue and asides. Double entendres abound, and are sure to go over the heads of most kids, but enable older players to appreciate the skewed sense of humour characteristic of the series.
The graphics, although faithful to the film, are nothing special to look at, and the story is advanced disappointingly through a series of narrated stills. SpongeBob and Patrick have several different attack moves each, but their attributes can be handily increased at the end of each level with upgrade points. Gameplay is a fairly tame blend of jumping, bashing and collecting numerous dumbbells (don't ask). However, the few driving levels are a real blast and a welcome interruption from the platforming shenanigans, though your faithful Patty Wagon isn't the best-handling vehicle to ever grace a videogame.
We've all got a soft spot for SpongeBob here at OXM towers (Ben T in particular), but our osmotic obsession can't mask the fact that this is a by-the-numbers platformer, albeit a charming one. No damp squib, yet not quite a supersoaker either.
THE SUFFERING
OTT gore and swearing. Devoid of real scares, but gory and imaginative - Resi Evil fans will love it
Action adventure - Issue 29 (May 2004) - 8.0/10
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MW02102E)
TheSuffering.txtRead Review
Comparisons between The Suffering and the daddies of survival horror, Silent Hill and Resident Evil, show how developers have grown more skilful but a little less daring over the years. It tries to recapture Silent Hill's psychological terror and Resident Evil's gory thrills, proving reasonably successful at both.
Survival horror's winning formula demands an intimidating setting, and there are few places as horrific as Abbot Penitentiary, a 19th-century, Shawkshank-inspired prison. Add in a horde of disgusting monsters designed by Hollywood legend Stan Winston (Pumpkinhead), and you're halfway to delivering some heart-racing scares.
Winston's creatures are cleverly based on sadistic methods of execution. Some are recognisably human, such as Horace, an electrocuted wife-murderer, while others are so badly mutilated that they look like puppets. Slayers are the game's staple enemies, swarming in great numbers with blades in place of their amputated limbs. There is something undeniably creepy about hearing them scuttle across the ceiling towards you, especially when they're shrouded in darkness.
Equally disgusting, Mainliners are pincushions of lethal injections that silently emerge from underground. When they pounce on your shoulders, the only way to avoid a lethal injection is to tap the Left trigger, and you'll be doing a lot of that.
Luckily, these sinister creatures hate each other even more than they hate you. Lead bloodthirsty monsters towards a pack of terrified convicts and they'll tear each other apart. Prisoners and wardens also attack you, but they won't be able to after you've blown their arms and legs off with a shotgun. The Suffering has a willfully unconscionable attitude to bloodshed.
So much gore is splattered about that you're not so much disgusted as amused. Mutilated bodies and executed prisoners lie all over the penitentiary - some even twitch and gurgle as you walk past! If gratuitousness is your thing, you'll also enjoy the extreme level of swearing. Credit is due for the imaginative combinations of expletives but again, they often come across as ridiculously funny rather than 'rock hard' prison talk.
Despite being childish at times, mature themes can be found if you delve a little deeper. At the start of the game, lead character Torque is on death row for the murder of his family. Whether he deserves to do the time (and the lethal injection) depends on your actions throughout the game. Subtlety isn't the game's strong point, so you're more likely to turn evil if you torture someone to death than if you say a cross word to them la KOTOR.
There are plenty of opportunities to become a saint or sinner - toying around with the gas chamber lever ends in a toxic lungful for one unlucky warden. Being evil has side effects though, including insanity, bloodstained clothes and diseased skin to name the worst.
Like Eternal Darkness, the more enemies you encounter, the more you become a few soap bars short of a prison choir. Symptoms include flashing subliminal images of your not-so-happy family and horrible gruff voices commanding you to be a sadist. Fill your insanity bar completely and the Y button transforms you into a hulking whirling dervish of teeth and claws. In this guise, you can dash around, eviscerating enemies with a single blow. It's great fun, and also a well-conceived metaphor for Torque's uncontrollable rage.
Being a beast isn't so bad, especially when the human characters look like cartoonish stick men. Superb sound effects and voiceovers are the only reason to take them seriously at all. As mentioned earlier, the electrocuted wife-beater Horace is absolutely exceptional. His empathy with Torque is disturbing at the best of times.
Ultimately, the game's biggest asset is Abbot Penitentiary itself. Level design is such that you feel like you're really inside a working prison. Visiting rooms, exercise yards and even working execution chambers are there to be explored. There's even a spattering of outdoor levels where the foliage is bristling with monsters. While scenery is occasionally bland and the lighting effects lack punch or volume, the prison still captivates by slowly confessing its hideous past. Spontaneous in-game flashbacks reveal the darkest hours of American history, from 19th-century slavery to spy executions in WWII.
The Suffering has all the key ingredients of an entertaining survival horror and, unusually, can be played in both third and first-person perspectives. Playing through in first-person adds a fresh dimension to the genre. Otherwise, there's little we haven't seen before. While lacking the graphical polish of Silent Hill 3 and Resident Evil 0, the storytelling here is slightly superior. So yes, The Suffering delivers the creepy, gory ride that's part and parcel of the genre, just don't expect to be scared or particularly surprised.
THE SUFFERING: TIES THAT BIND
Back to the beautiful city of Baltimore for more pain, misery and extreme demon-based violence.
Survival Horror - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 8.4/10
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MW04401L)
Suffering.txtRead Review
Imagine looking through a stranger's window to see the person inside dancing around by themselves in total silence. Would you think them mad, or would you stop to wonder if they were cavorting to a tune that no one else could hear? The magical song drumming inside Torque's head sounds like razors through flesh. He's not only a captive in a physical sense (formerly an inmate of Carnate Island Prison), but also of his own bloody past and more recent homicidal tendencies.
Ties That Bind suggests an inescapable past. Not just the horrors that Torque went through in the first game (Issue 29, 8.0), but the shame and misery of slavery, poverty, gang violence and rape that runs through Baltimore's veins. Just like the first game, this unrelentingly brutal tale is as much about real American nightmares as it is about strange creatures and supernatural beings.
Although Ties That Bind is only set in a prison during the opening level, its clever trick is to make the city of Baltimore seem like a detention camp. It's partly down to deliberately linear, constrictive level design, but more importantly it's a product of well-considered artwork. The city's appearance mixes urban gothic with 1950s kitsch and 1990s decay, a very surreal but totally believable world.
One standout scene is when you return to Torque's apartment where his wife and sons were murdered. It's straight from the movie Se7en, with its bloodstained floors and nasty-looking mattress. Suddenly a train rushes past the boarded-up window, light and noise rattling through the cracks. The lighting's softer and more realistic this time.
As in the first game, Ties That Bind springs interactive flashback sequences on you, revealing Torque's and the city's heinous past. Most follow his family and criminal ties, ending in bloodshed and a long stay at Carnate. In the city's case, you'll witness the atrocities committed by a black slaver called Copperfield, and The Creeper, a sickeningly misogynistic serial killer. That's not to mention a few urban legends, such as the reverend who feeds his starving ministry with human remains.
It's storytelling so twisted and intriguing that you almost don't need any combat to make it entertaining. But thankfully the game's blend of first- and third-person shooting is well executed, and has been turned up a notch since the original.
Torque's arsenal now has a contemporary gangland twist, with modern machine guns, bazookas and the exquisite .357 Magnum. There's still an unsatisfying shortage of ammo, but pointing a sawn-off at one of the monstrous Gorgers and watching its body explode more than makes up for it. Limbs flying off and ribcages being ripped open are a common sight, as is the presence of dead junkies and mutilated homeless people.
Pleasingly, you can switch between third- and first-person at almost any time. You'll probably have to make more use of first-person this time, as some levels are designed more like a traditional corridor shooter. The human enemies are better armed and more intelligent than before. Most are part of a special ops squad called the Foundation, out to capture you for your unique special ability...
The combat is fun and satisfying, but runs out of tricks after a while. When you know what patterns the grotesquely designed monsters (each based on a method of execution, starvation or addiction) follow, predictability starts to slip in.
While the more linear levels have their good points, such as ensuring you see all the cut-scenes and making you feel trapped, they can also be frustrating when you still manage to get lost and confused. At several points, you have to find a door lever or ventilation shaft to access the next section, but there's little to point you in the right direction. The game is very dark, making pathfinding very difficult at times. It's not for the easily frustrated.
But a few minor problems aside, the biggest treat in Ties That Bind is easily the audio. It's absolutely first-rate and very cleverly implemented. The background noise is at times subtle (dogs barking, trains rattling past), at times unbearably disturbing (the hustle of a mob lynching and tortured screams). Conversations overheard in the distance are also a really canny way of explaining the story without overdoing it.
Ties That Bind offers the best kind of horror in gaming, because it never cops out and tries to put you at ease. Surreal Software really doesn't care if you're disgusted, offended or just plain horrified by what you see. While the gameplay is solid, it's the excellent, intelligent storyline and merciless atmosphere that will really have you hooked. Just make sure you steel yourself before you turn the lights out and boot up your Xbox...
THE THING
Plenty of action and atmosphere but doesn't live up to its promise
Survival horror - Issue 8 (October 2002) - 7.4/10
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VV00301E)
TheThing.txtRead Review
Outside, it's 40¡ below. Inside you, assuming a decent bill of health, it's 37¡. An alien form that crashed to Earth thousands of years ago, landing in deep freeze within the Antarctic, needs a host.
What better than the members of the meddling research team that disturbed it from its slumber after a long sleep? When they're cold, humans wrap up nice and cosy, so we're the alien's best option. At least, they were in the 1982 movie The Thing, the story of which is continued by this game of the same name.
You begin the adventure on a search and rescue mission, leading a team that lands at the dilapidated Norwegian research complex left at the end of the film. Neither you nor your squad has any idea of what happened that led to the ruin of the facility, or just who - or what - left the many butchered corpses littering the area.
Beginning where the movie finished is a superb idea, and gets the game off to a strong start. It's faithful to the events of John Carpenter's creature feature, and continues the plot in a seamless, believable manner. Not long into the early stages, you find McCready's taped records, and Childs' corpse, not long dead and clutching a bottle of booze. Anyone familiar with the movie, and even those who aren't, will be on spine-tingling ground as the Thing then gradually makes its presence felt.
There's a great opening hour, and it helps create an atmosphere of dread, isolation and mania, particularly through the use of sound. Music is used sparsely, dramatically kicking in to jolt your nerve endings; the moody bass twangs from Carpenter's original score are here. There's little ambient noise besides human movements and howling subzero winds, but there is an excellent and unsettling 'whoosh' that occurs whenever the Thing attacks.
Get deeper into the game, however, and the plot falls under the creative direction of the developer, and this is where things become very predictable, twists included.
It all goes a bit Half-Life (only not as good), with shady government types making yet another appearance. We won't ruin things for you, but it seems that, for developers, well-worn sci-fi hokum is the warmest kind of plot in which to hide, too. It's not all bad, though, as a sense of tension does run throughout the game.
This isn't an amazing-looking game by any standards, but certain lighting and flame effects are pretty. The biggest letdown of all, however, is just how weakly the concepts of trust, teamwork and paranoia are implemented. This is the stuff that made the film so thrilling, and promised to set the game apart from the pack.
The interface for issuing commands to your team works well, and is simple to use. But you can't do much more than ask them to follow or stay, and to give to and take from them.
Admittedly, you don't need them to perform anything complicated, since their only role is to provide extra firepower and open certain doors for you.
At times, they are unable to bring themselves in out of the cold despite moaning about it, or move themselves two steps forward out of the way of a sentry gun placement. The dependable fellas from Conflict: Desert Storm (Issue 07, 8.1) need to take this lot away for a week of team building in a hut in Wales.
The level of trust between you and your men extends to little else but a gun fetish. Give them a weapon, and they'll gurgle with chuffed belief in you. Take it away, and they become suspicious. And that's about it. We did, in one later level, gain the trust of someone when he saw us blowing away some bad guys, but we're still not convinced that the idea of faith goes much deeper than trading arms.
If these troops have the ability to think for themselves, they rarely show it outside of battle where, it must be said, they are relatively dependable and accurate. But don't give them flamethrowers, or you're asking for friendly fire tragedies.
Similarly, the level of paranoia that the game tries to instil within your team is clumsy and, ultimately, pointless. Any one of them could be infected with the Thing, but you won't care. For starters, it doesn't matter if you've handed them a weapon because, if they mutate, they just drop it and lumber after you like any other monster. Even if they are infected, give them a weapon anyway and they'll act as a helpful firepower drone until they decide to turn nasty.
Also, the blood test kits don't work; several times we tested someone who gets the all clear, only for them to transmogrify into a tentacled beastie just moments later. It all seems scripted, thus removing the sense of paranoia, which is a real shame.
Overall, The Thing is a decent mix of the remorseless, nasty terror of Silent Hill 2: Inner Fears (Issue 08, 8.4) and the corporate alien shenanigans of the classic Half-Life, with an emphasis on shooty action. It's lucky that the over-the-shoulder perspective works extremely
well during combat, otherwise you'd be too confused during the mutant mash.
The elements that could have made this game truly unique aren't strong enough, and end up feeling limp and cosmetic. It's still enjoyable and a great follow-up to the movie for fans, but it's not quite the terrifying game it promised, and perhaps even deserved, to be.
THE URBZ: SIMS IN THE CITY
Colourful, fun and literally full of life. Innovative and a much-needed move away from traditional Sims gameplay
World builder - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 8.0/10
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EA09602E)
Urbz.txtRead Review
PC fans might have got themselves The Sims 2, but Maxis hasn't forgotten about the consolers and it's created a brand new franchise especially for us in the shape of The Urbz: Sims in the City. Doesn't it make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside?
So you've taken the big step and moved out of the comfort and regular laundry washing of your parental home, and now it's time to face city life. Once you've created your basic Urb you get to take them into one of nine areas in the city which are all controlled by different gangs. These include the punks that inhabit the seedy Central Station, stuffing themselves with chips and pounding each other in their own personal Fight Club. Then there are the skaters that live in Kicktail Park and like nothing better than skating their hearts out and then stopping off at Floaters, the local party bar, where they inhale helium until they sound like Alvin and his merry band of Chipmunks.
But Urbz is all about gaining a reputation with each of these cliques as well as keeping your own five needs in check (food, entertainment, sleep, bowel movement and hygiene). That means you'll have to socialise and work out what makes them tick, which will allow you access to new areas and social moves. More importantly you'll have to buy clothes to blend in so you don't go into the J-Pop and sushi-filled streets of Neon East wearing one of Marilyn Manson's cast-offs.
As well as being a social butterfly, you'll have to find some way of paying the rent on your new apartment and buying furniture to impress your new-found friends. Every area has its own job opportunities. For example, you can make body piercings, sculptures or try your hand as a sushi chef, and all these jobs will require you to complete some basic button-bashing mini-games.
The Urbz is certainly a big departure from the traditional Sims gameplay and it's all the better for it. It's extremely accessible - although the longish loading times are a bit of a pain - and a hoot to play, with a constant stream of details that'll keep you smiling.
THE WARRIORS
Old-school brawling kitted out with the latest in Rockstar violence!
Beat 'em up - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 8.0/10
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TT15502E)
Warriors.txtRead Review
Reinventing the scrolling beat 'em up through the medium of tight denim, big hair and cassette radios is a brave thing to do. It could have been so easy to give the genre a predictable 'blinging urban' theme, but Rockstar has gone one better and returned to the badass roots of urban gang culture, with this videogame adaptation of 1979 movie The Warriors, a violent story of rival gangs fighting for turf in New York City, dressed in period clothes and hairstyles.
The Warriors clearly tips its hat to the likes of Streets of Rage and Final Fight, with Rockstar trying to recapture the 'good old days' of the beat 'em up. Obligatory subway sections are included - you can pick up weapons, hurl bottles and bricks, hold enemies in submission positions, and generally kick the living do-dah out of everything that walks. But then, this is the 21st century, and this is Rockstar we're talking about...
So the violence is shocking (naturally), glass bottles being shoved into faces, heads smacked into brick walls, and bodies thrown under subway cars. But The Warriors is about quite a bit more than just cracking skulls and leaving a trail of devastation in your gang's wake. A good three-quarters of the game is set before the movie on which it's based, and sees you guide your gang through the ranks of New York's underworld.
It's this that forms the most interesting aspect of the game, as it uses the controller as more than just a tool with which to stove people's heads in. You have to smash and grab car stereos (four consecutive turns of the thumbstick and the screws are loose), mug people for cash (prevent the pad from vibrating to stop them struggling away), and 'tag' subway cars and walls with the Warriors logo, where you have to follow the outline with the spraycan, a bit like in those village fete games where you're not allowed to touch the bendy wire, in order to tag things properly. Tag well, and rival gangs will go ruddy-faced with rage.
The combat is fairly simple compared to more sophisticated brawlers, but that's not to say it isn't frequent or inventive. We counted at least a dozen enemies on screen at one point, and it never got dull throwing them through windows or into flaming cars, even if we did seem to be repeating the same moves. We did find, though, that sometimes our squad of Warriors was accidentally damaged by our attacks, and the AI didn't ensure they stayed out of harm's way. You can issue orders to your squads of goons, telling them to wreck everything in sight, run for cover, or watch your back, but in the thick of a riot you're as likely to smash a bottle over the head of a fellow Warrior as you are a member of a rival gang.
The Warriors isn't new - they were making games like this back in the 1980s - but it never ceases to be entertaining. The violence is intercut with missions to undermine other gangs, and there are plenty of opportunities for wanton destruction if you get bored. It's really faithful to the film too, but you don't have to be a fan to appreciate it - this is basically Rockstar's take on Streets of Rage, a jolly ghetto romp where the streets are paved with smashed-in faces. And it really works too!
THIEF: DEADLY SHADOWS
Captivating, atmospheric, with massive replayability
Stealth - Issue 31 (July 2004) - 8.9/10
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ES00402E)
Thief.txtRead Review
Remember how we all played hide and seek when we were kids? Well, what if you could play it again, but with intelligent adversaries instead of your whining little sister and, better still, club them over the head or shoot them in the face with an arrow if they got too close? We're not condoning violence towards snotty siblings, but those clandestine cravings can be realised with the ace stealth 'em up Thief: Deadly Shadows. If you're a fan of the genre, chances are you've played the original Thief titles on PC. The grandaddys of stealth games, they saw master-pilferer Garrett, via a first-person perspective, stalk and steal from the wealthy inhabitants of The City. Yet with Deadly Shadows, you'd be forgiven for thinking you'd somehow managed to pick up the wrong game. No longer limited to first-person views, a slick new engine allows us the preferred option to continuously see Garrett, in all his glory, via third-person.
The core elements of every stealth game are present - staying in the shadows and creeping slowly and silently is the way forward. But pinching purists fear not, for the faithful first-person perspective remains and can be easily accessed at any point during the game. What the new point of view does do however, is open up a whole new world of plundering possibilities. Gameplay is exponentially increased as players have much greater control when sneaking up on guards and remaining hidden in the shadows, and the camera thankfully does a decent job of allowing unfettered 360û vision.
We've come to expect that any game associated with Warren Spector and Ion Storm, of Deus Ex: Invisible War (Issue 26, 9.0) fame, is bound to boast a deep and involving storyline, and this is no exception. Through beautifully lit cutscenes, we gradually learn that the Keepers (the mysterious rulers of the City) have discovered a warning within the ancient prophecies that an impending age of darkness is coming. They recruit master thief Garrett (previously trained by said Keepers) to aid their cause, but he's unaware that his name features prominently in the prophecies and that the Keepers have other agendas for him.
Believe us when we tell you that Deadly Shadows is deeper than a blue whale with weight issues. The City acts as a central hub, where Garrett can spend time between missions, plying his treacherous trade. Brimming with a host of characters, there's ample scope here to sneak and steal to your heart's content, be it a passing nobleman's belt purse or breaking into the local tavern after hours to reap the landlord's rewards of a busy night (the ultimate test of stealthing ability). Shops scattered around each district will take the fruits of your labour off your hands for a tidy little sum, earning you a spending spree in the equipment stores. But the City Watch know your face well and are constantly on the lookout; get spotted and it's off to jail. Game over, then? No chance, merely the added challenge of escaping from your cell, recovering your gear and fleeing the prison.
Each mission (usually set by the Keepers) has specific objectives, though the fantastic non-linear gameplay means these can be accomplished in any number of ways. Players are required to steal objects, discover artefacts and carry out specific jobs, and the stealthier the better. Garrett has a whole host of tools, from various arrows and flash bombs to his blackjack and trusty lockpick. We're also pleased to report that, unlike modern-day tealeafs, Garrett shuns fake Burberry. Phew.
The environments are expansive and brilliant level design means there are always just enough hiding places or shadows to accomplish each objective while remaining challenging. Often missions will incorporate smaller sub-objectives, opening up even more unexplored areas. No matter which path you take, clues and hints are sparingly dished out in a number of guises (careless whispers, discarded parchments) to point players in the right direction.
Missions frequently involve altercations with the two warring factions fighting for control of the City - the Hammerites and Pagans. Inevitably you'll upset them both, but get the chance to redeem yourself with either by carrying out simple tasks for them. Helping the Hammerites, for example, will increase your faction allegiance to them from hostile to neutral, although this won't exactly endear you to the Pagans. Not only will the Hammerites no longer attack you on sight, you'll also have access to secret areas in their sector of the city to carry out further skulduggery. Choices like this make the storyline of Deadly Shadows more akin to an RPG than an actioner, and greatly increases both gameplay and replayability.
It's a testament to the game's brilliant scripting that you'll be constantly thinking about it throughout the course of your normal day. You'll be sucked headlong into its deep and absorbing world, forced to work through "just one more level" to see what happens next. The ace dialogue plays a major role as well. If you happen across a couple of NPCs having a quiet chinwag, think twice before tossing that gas bomb and sending them both to sleep. More often than not their conversation will produce an advantageous piece of information, be it a clue to further hidden loot or opening up a completely new mission altogether.
Along with the absorbing script, what really elevates Thief: Deadly Shadows to the head of the Guild is the absolutely fantastic enemy AI. Every opponent is a freethinking foe that requires the utmost respect. Very inquisitive by nature, each ascending 'class' of guard is more intelligent than the last, yet even the lowliest simpleton is a fair match for Garrett, alert to the slightest noise or shadow. Their behaviour is entirely unpredictable, and unique to each individual scenario, keeping gameplay fresh and varied.
Extinguish a torch and the guards will notice the increased darkness on their next pass and alert their companions. We loved the brilliant touch where you knock out a guard and hide his body, only to have his companions discover one of their number missing, and assume some loitering gang members did the dastardly deed. The result? An entertainingly violent episode that proves the perfect distraction for you to proceed to the next area. Genius.
Deadly Shadows boasts some of the most realistic lighting effects we've ever seen on Xbox. Flaming torches create gorgeous soft illumination, whilst casting eerily lifelike shadows on the surrounding environment. Aside from looking the business, these play an absolutely vital role in your progression through the game, as Garrett depends on the fluctuating levels of darkness to remain unseen - think of a medieval Sam Fisher.
Unfortunately, Garrett doesn't share the same grace and fluidity of a Third Echelon agent, as poor animation sees our hero slipping and skidding on a worryingly frequent basis. Progressive movement control via the Left thumbstick results in Garrett reducing the amount of noise he makes the slower his movement, but trying to covertly creep past an enemy guard in a narrow corridor can result in our hero ungainly moonwalking (and getting stuck) against a neighbouring wall.
Try not to worry about this too much though, and we're left with a top-notch adventure title. Sure, some of the missions are punishingly tough (the Keeper library for example - get spotted once and it's game over), but this only adds to Deadly Shadows' charm. Sit back and drink up the amazingly atmospheric graphics and incredibly addictive gameplay, and live out those deceptive desires in this wonderfully dark stealth 'em up that steals the genre back to the Middle Ages. Brilliant.
TIGER WOODS PGA TOUR 2003
Great swing system. Loads of modes. Fantastic courses
Sports - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 8.5/10
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EA03302E)
Tiger2003.txtRead Review
Tiger Woods's stock has fallen in Europe recently. After all, we effortlessly tonked him and his friends in the recent Ryder Cup, scotching any notion that Europe doesn't produce golfers on a par with their US counterparts.
And Tiger himself can seem more than a little detached from the rest of the tour at times, because he thinks he's it.
But to be fair, Tiger is it. He's won four Majors in a row, with only pedantry standing between him and the claim of a fabled Grand Slam (it's not, because technically he only held all four Majors over a couple of seasons, rather than just the one). That's an absolutely immense, almost unimaginable achievement in this day and age.
You wouldn't expect a chap like Woody Tigs - for that's what we fondly call him here at Official UK Xbox Magazine - to put his great name to an inferior product. And he hasn't - he's put his name to a really quite splendid game, in the form of Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003.
The chief reason the game is so good to play is the swing system, which makes sound use of the analogue capabilities of the thumbstick. It's not new, but it's a great alternative to the usual power meter, which is an overly simplistic way to represent something as complex as a golf swing. Using the thumbstick is a far superior way to replicate the swing, as it allows the player to control the line of the swing, the power, and the timing, all through one easily understood system.
The result is an experience that requires the player to actually think like a golfer in order to score well. Hitting half-shots is tricky to judge - as in the real game - so to play with authority you ideally need to manage the course effectively, attacking the greens with a full swing. And the way you apply fade and draw to the ball is a satisfying and intelligent use of the control pad too.
As with MotoGP: Ultimate Racing Technology (Issue 04, 8.9), clever use of the analogue capabilities of the Xbox controller results in a game that's much more rewarding than others of its ilk.
Bolted onto the solid golfing engine is a collection of courses featuring many of the finest holes ever designed. The Road Hole (17th) at St Andrews? Go on then. The island par three at TPC Sawgrass? That's here too. You get the general idea - courses like these, plus Royal Birkdale, Pebble Beach and many more make this a must for fans of golf games. The huge wallet of EA's licensing department has been put to good use with this one.
Another plus in the game's favour is the large number of variations on the basic swinging game. Speed Golf is a mad rush through the course, in which you even control your player's sprint to the ball they've just hit up the fairway. Playing this in two-player mode with a split screen is something of a hoot. You can challenge and unlock loads of top golfers - and Colin Montgomerie - by beating them at matchplay, strokeplay, or skins. You can play loads of different mini-games, or jump on a par three course for a couple of holes if you just fancy a few quick holes.
A high standard of character modelling and animation rounds off a long list of plus points, together with a host of atmospheric spot effects and replays that accompany perfectly timed shots.
However, there is the odd bogey that prevents Tiger's card from being perfect. While the natty replays provide atmosphere, some of the courses do feel a little empty, despite the cheers that greet good shots. Sparse crowds mean that you never really feel you're playing in the crucible of a packed-out tournament.
Another problem is that the game is, at the default settings, overly easy. Picking up birdies is simplicity itself, and the game will quickly lose its appeal if you play with soft greens and light breezes. For a proper challenge, and a more satisfying game, we recommend making the greens faster than ceramic.
The only other thing you need to know before deciding whether to slap your hard-earned notes down is the fact that the game can be rather repetitive. Despite the numerous courses and challenges, you're still only swinging a club. Your appreciation of the sport itself is therefore more important in determining your enjoyment of this game than it is for the likes of, say, the Madden NFL or NHL series.
But if you do like golf, and you're on the hunt for a top-class, realistic sim, this won't disappoint. The sheer number of things to try out and an excellent swing system mean that Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003 is the best way to get some links action in when it's raining.
TIGER WOODS PGA TOUR 2004
Not so much a sequel as an update. Think twice if you own 2003
Sports - Issue 21 (October 2003) - 7.4/10
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EA05801E)
Tiger2004.txtRead Review
Like the game of golf itself, we have a love/hate relationship with the Tiger Woods franchise that fades and draws between intense satisfaction and immense frustration. It's the best golf experience currently available, but a few serious problems hacked great ugly divots out of its lush 2003 fairway - divots rudely not replaced for this 2004 Tour.
The mid-flight spin system for instance, is a fantastic concept. It maximises steady involvement by making sure that you're still to some extent in control of events beyond twonking the ball off the tee. Tapping the Black button while the ball splits the blue accelerates spin, with rotation controlled by the Left stick. In theory this allows you to rein over-zealous hacks with hard backspin, or roll gently pin-ward on touchdown should the head or side-wind be stronger than you judged.
All good stuff. But nothing has been learned from the detrimental camera angles of the 2003 version that still plague actual implementation of spinning in 2004. Too often you still cut to a facial close-up of your Pringled avatar as he/she watches the ball disappear with a mildly concerned expression. What you actually want to see at this point is your ball's flight over the fairway or green, so that your ability to correct with spin is meaningful, not blind guess-timation.
Even when you are granted ball-cam, the pursuit angle can be excessively oblique, especially when hanging over the green, and denies all but the roughest idea of where the ball will drop. Whether this is a deliberate temperance of the spin feature to stop it becoming too easy (spin is one of the attributes you can add skill points to), or just laziness to correct a basic flaw, it's a frustrating lack that might have easily been addressed.
Even more negligent is the total failure to improve the putting in this year's edition. Tiger Woods again eschews any form of target measurement system, with no fixed grid overlay or quantifiable aiming distances for greens. There's only a wide grid system that moves with your chipping/putting cursor and is supposed to lend a little more interpretation to gradient - something that the greens' texture maps alone still fail miserably to provide, even with fly-by.
It wouldn't even be so hard to judge putts if the camera remained a fixed distance - at least you'd have the single reference point of the hole's diameter to extrapolate. But the further you drag the putting cursor, the higher the camera climbs to accommodate, bending all scale round its knee and throwing it petulantly into the gasping crowd. Add wildly inaccurate caddy advice to this tantrum-inducing experience and a good walk can indeed be spoiled into a grumpy stomp. At least the superb animations lend a little wry humour to your golfer's exasperation.
So those are the essential gripes. The faults of Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2003 have just been raked over in their bunker for its annual update. Camera angles and putting remain bugbears in the Woods, the tutorial is identical, the engine is the same so there's no appreciable graphical advancement. Award screens still appear for just too long and can't be skipped, neither can the other players' shots in Tournament modes (you can again accelerate time slightly). Often invisible crowds cheer improbably and teeing off is still just a little on the moronic side of idiot-proof, with even power boost too quick to master.
But despite all this, Tiger Woods PGA Tour 2004 is still a joy to play. It's accessible to a fault, the commentators (David Feherty and Gary McCord) are delightfully gentle in their lilting sarcasm, the steady accumulation of skill points to raise your various sporting attributes is perfectly paced, with a far more extensive Tour Shop allowing total customisation of clubs and couture. The seven new courses are beautifully arranged and varied and you can create your own custom course from any of the unlocked holes. The character creation is great fun (if little more than a Sims 2-inspired gimmick), and there are many new play modes including World Tour, more Traditional Games and an inspired Battle Golf feature where you play for each other's clubs.
It's just that at the end of the round, you'll be sipping a G&T at the 19th hole and wondering why you spent £40 on what is basically an update that provides seven new courses, some fun new modes of play and blankly refuses to fix any of the problems of last year's Tour. Tiger Woods either needs to admit it's an update and employ a budget retail model, as the excellent Ghost Recon: Island Thunder (£20) does, or fix the few niggles that could make this great franchise unassailable. And with the good-looking, Live-enabled, Links 2004 on its way, Tiger Woods will now have to earn its stripes before they're stripped.
TIGER WOODS PGA TOUR 2005
Drives the perfect line between simulation and arcade action
Sports - Issue 34 (October 2004) - 8.7/10
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Tiger2005.txtRead Review
It's be fair to say EA's come under some flak for its long-running sports franchises, with critics bemoaning that each successive release seems to be merely an uninspired update of the previous one. With the Tiger's latest outing however, its Redwood studio has put things to rights, incorporating some all-new game features.
Of course, all the familiar options are still available, like PGA Tour (Career mode), strokeplay, skins etc, and the fun practice courses. Once you've created your on-screen abomination (as all of ours seemed to be), enter My Legend and work your way up from Putting Prodigy to Swinging Superstar. No, not a nocturnal suburban legend, but one out on the course who, after defeating established Pros on the way up, gets the chance to take on one of the game's greats. Jack Niklaus, Arnold Palmer, Seve B and more all feature, and success in Legend mode results in you amassing Legend coins, which allows you to modify any course and paves the way for another innovative feature: Tiger Proofing.
This brilliantly lets players alter the fairway width, bunker size (who'd make them bigger?) and undulation. Course upkeep can be altered from pristine to poor, as can the weather and time of day. These all have a massive impact on your ball's physics and behaviour (i.e. an immaculate hole on a hot day will see your dimpled device bounce higher than Ram Man on a Smarties overdose). This obviously has a major effect on gameplay, and significantly enhances the lifespan of the title once career mode has been clocked.
Once again, all manner of accessories are available in the Pro Shop so you can be just like Tiger, if you want. More than 1500 new items join the already-countless numbers of shades, apparel, headwear and shoes. You can now buy a defaulted swing for your character from one of the featured Pros or, for that personal touch, customise your own. Adjust your swing length, knee flex, followthrough (never a pretty sight) and hand position to tailor your own golfing style.
To add a bit of a strategy, we now have Tiger Vision - an invaluable putting aid from the big guy himself. Sparingly allocated to several uses per round, you can tap the White button on a tricky putt for a yellow dot to appear on the green. Align the cursor dead centre in the time limit and you'll sink the shot every time. This adds massively to the gameplay experience, especially in multiplayer.
Factor in these new features and couple them with the tweaked graphical polish, fantastic swing system and added original and authentic courses, and Tiger Woods 2005 is the most comprehensive golf game ever made. The only complaint we have is the lack of (previously promised) Xbox Live play in Europe, which would have driven this straight into the multiplayer hall of legends. However, it's still much more than just an update, and EA will have to go some to outdo itself again next year. Might we suggest Live play?
TIGER WOODS PGA TOUR 06
The Tiger finally gets a Live mode for his golf game! A solid update to an already excellent series
Sports - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 9.0/10
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Tiger06.txtRead Review
The main problem with releasing new instalments year in, year out for long-running sports franchises is always the same: coming up with enough new ideas to make this year's game significantly different to last year's. But in this case, we can only assume that somebody at EA's development studio had been nudging the turps a bit too hard, because this year's big Tiger Woods innovation - and this is no word of a lie - is TIME TRAVEL.
Straight up. We're talking science fiction and professional golf combined in a non-stop explosion of time-bending, wedge-chipping action. Forget your woods and your irons - this is as much about Newtonian space-time physics and flux capacitors as it is about pars and bogies. It's not the hole you'll be shooting for on the green, it's the WORMhole!
Okay, perhaps that's a slight exaggeration, but, amazingly, time travel forms the central premise behind Tiger Woods 06's new Career mode. Not content with the simplistic, slightly disjointed World and Legend Tour modes of previous games, Tiger Woods PGA Tour 06 now boasts a full era-skipping story. Called Rivals mode, it involves following Tiger Woods (resplendent in full period golfing costume) through history as he challenges the best golfers of yesteryear in an attempt to not just become the greatest golfer, but the greatest golfer of ALL TIME.
Which clearly sounds like a bit of a laugh - and it is, providing you realise that all it really comes down to is a slightly different front end for the same old par-three challenges and match-ups against fantasy and real-life golfers. There are no actual time-travelling pyrotechnics, just a few static clubhouse screens that change decor to suit your current time period, and the option to pick a match or challenge from the board behind the desk. If anything, it's a step back from 04 and 05's Tour modes in terms of ease of menu navigation, but then when did those versions ever have Tiger in a flat cap and a pair of 1930s brogues?
However you end up feeling about Tiger's time-travelling adventure - and we get the feeling this one's going to split opinion - it's simply another example of the staggering amount of content that's been packed into this year's game. Apart from Rivals mode, there's still the PGA Tour mode (which can now run for a ludicrous 30 seasons), real-time events that unlock according to your Xbox's internal clock (with a different event for every day now no less), a new hoop-hitting 'Skills' game, plus all the usual matchplay, skins, Stableford and countless other golfing variations. In EA-speak, it's totally Tigerific!
But that's exactly what we expected. The Tiger Woods series has never lacked for content, after all. What's really at stake here are the changes to the actual golf itself, which leads us nicely to PGA Tour 06's biggest innovation - the Right analogue shot-shaping stick. In the same way you use the Left analogue stick to mimic the action of the club swing, you now use the Right stick to add spin, hook and draw to your shot.
While we like the idea in principle - the Left stick alone never felt suitable for subtle shot alterations - an immediate problem springs to mind for Tiger Woods veterans used to hitting the Black and White spin and power buttons: for humans with fewer than three hands, how is it possible to use both sticks and hammer the joypad at the same time? Answer: you can't, which initially makes the whole shot-shaping feature rather pointless. Why risk an awkward backspin shot on the analogue stick when you can just give the Black button a good bash instead?
But this is where Tiger 06 gets nasty, because once you switch things up to Tour difficulty - a virtual necessity if you want any challenge from the still routinely beatable computer - the button-mashing technique stops working, meaning you have to use the shot-shaping stick. It's not easy either. Wrenching just the right amount of spin out of it takes a fair amount of practice, but learn to use it properly and suddenly a whole new level of challenge awaits.
Likewise, Tiger Woods PGA Tour 06's new putting system makes for far more interesting play - rather than simply picking a target spot on the green, you now use the analogue sticks to hit the ball. It feels far more responsive and intuitive. Thankfully, the rubbish 'Tiger Vision' system from last year has also been ditched.
And the game gets harder still, with courses that change and adapt as you improve. Greens shrink, bunkers swell, grass lengthens and fairways narrow. Of course, you can still play the game the old-fashioned way, with all the caddy tips and swing-aids switched on, but given the lack of challenge was one of the biggest complaints about the series, we're all for it. Especially in multiplayer, which leads us nicely to our final point: the Live mode. As in, there actually is one!
Put simply, if you're a Live gamer you need Tiger Woods 06 in the same way you need Halo 2, Pro Evolution Soccer 4, Project Gotham Racing 2 and Dead or Alive Ultimate. It's taken its sweet time getting here, but as an online game this is perfect stuff: easy to pick up, difficult to master and immensely satisfying to beat your rivals at. You don't have to be a golf bore to enjoy it, just a fan of beating your friends, and for this reason alone we're giving Tiger the big thumbs-up. For another year running. Good for you, Mr Woods!
TIMESPLITTERS 2
The most complete FPS package on Xbox. Rife with features. Just buy it
First-person shooter - Issue 9 (November 2002) - 9.3/10
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TimeSplitters2.txtRead Review
Let's quickly nip back in time. It's autumn 2000, Xbox is still just an entry in Microsoft's To Do list, and TimeSplitters is a PS2 launch game. Made by Free Radical Design, aka Some Of The Blokes What Made GoldenEye on the N64, it's slick, polished, a little bare, and nothing more than a glorified game of Capture The Flag bundled with an avalanche of multiplayer options.
Fast forward to the present day and the game has spawned a sequel. It seems that the developers have also travelled back - to the drawing board. A big part of why TimeSplitters 2 is how it is must be the time and effort spent looking at the first game and changing it, to make something better the original. As it goes, the hard work has paid off in abundance.
The TimeSplitters are a lowly bunch of dimension-hopping, freaky-faced aliens who view humanity as a valuable commodity to be manacled, enslaved and exploited. They plan to achieve their aim by crawling through time and meddling in several periods of civilisation. This is where you intervene, Quantum Leap style, to halt their apocalyptic temporal gropings.
It doesn't matter where the jackknifing plot carries you, because you can be certain of having a good time wherever you go. Within minutes of first play, it becomes obvious that TimeSplitters 2 is a genuinely excellent game.
Maybe you'll get that feeling from the beautifully pitched scale of challenge posed by each difficulty level. Or the polished quality of the vividly coloured environments that read like Dr Who's passport: Wild West, Aztec Jungle, Robot Factory to name three of the ten. No iffy collision detection or sloppy glitches here, just finely tuned, lovingly buffed, gameplay throughout.
But that should already be obvious in the expansive range of options, tweakables and unlockables that are on offer, making TimeSplitters 2 one of the best value-for-money games available. A hundred-plus characters to uncover, over 50 inventive and thoughtful challenges to joyfully plough through, a ream of arcade modes to conquer - you've got to love it.
And all that before considering the definitive range of multiplayer preferences. No other Xbox game, not even that one with Master Chief in it, comes close to offering the huge number of deathmatch variations present in TimeSplitters 2, or the amount of wonderful little touches that you won't see unless you look really close.
Maybe it's obvious in the cheeky, self-aware humour on display throughout. There are umpteen nods to GoldenEye in TimeSplitters 2 but it's not shameless, lazy theft. It's all used in an entertaining manner for those in the know, and makes for damn good content for those who aren't. There are also sly, witty digs at other gaming goliaths. Those pointless, destructible melons dotted about the first level? Come in, Metal Gear Solid 2, you're being mocked. Those hidden objects shaped suspiciously like grey plastic N64 cartridges? Lovely stuff.
Whatever you decide to pin it on, the fact that this is a class game socks you square in the face from the off. Good enough to whisk you away for days at a time, you'll love every impressive, rewarding minute of TimeSpliters 2.
But before the verdict, your honour, we'd also like to call a few criticisms to the dock. While there's no damning testimony, there's some evidence of room for improvement. Visually polished, with its own great, cartoon-for-grown-ups style, this is not as stunning as the graphical cream of Xbox titles. But we can live with that, like we'd happily live with a supermodel with a few pimples on her bum.
And, strangely, given the anal attention to options and configuration throughout the game, there's no option to alter the control sensitivity, making initial handling in your first few games a bit awkward. Aiming can be twitchy at first yet, bizarrely, turning your character feels a little sluggish. Once you begin to adapt though, it becomes precise and instinctive.
Clicking down on the Right thumbstick brings up a crosshair, allowing for zoom, and also lets you swing your aim about without moving your body too much, which sounds bemusing but actually works fine.
On the trickier difficulty settings, the breathless speed demands hair's breadth precision shots in double-quick time. You could argue that it's too hard. We say that challenge only makes you stronger.
It's frenetic, relentless, brash and, once you've become attuned to the 0 to 60 in five seconds, momentum-free pace of the action, it becomes violently enjoyable second nature.
And finally, in answer to the prosecution's final question, no, this isn't as good as Halo. That game is still something else, and remains superior in terms of looks, feel and that ever so crucial enemy intelligence.
But Master Chief is away prepping himself and learning his lines for his next big adventure, which is some way off. TimeSplitters 2 is right here, right now, and it's the third best game on Xbox, m'lud. It's sleek, finely tuned and anything else we can say that indicates an incredibly well-crafted game. We need more games like this, so get out your wallet at the first opportunity and vote TimeSplitters 2.
TIMESPLITTERS: FUTURE PERFECT
A derivative shooter with a few niggles, but fun and diverse with great longevity and excellent Live content
Screenshots - First-person shooter - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 9.0/10
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TimeSplitFP.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




Future perfect is still a phrase that injects a cold concentrate of pure school directly into my spine. Whenever I hear it I'm back in French class on a Monday morning having totally forgotten to revise verb declension over the wistfully departed weekend. If only I'd had access to TimeSplitters' wormholes then, my homework worries would have quit with even greater alacrity than my teary supply teacher.
But Riddick-style hardman Cortez in TimeSplitters: Future Perfect has greater worries and a more noble purpose for these rents in the fabric of the universe and must flit through temporal anomalies to foil the Earth-threatening advance of a new and even more ferocious wave of gruesome TimeSplitters. Try to imagine the original cast of Star Trek as they would look now. Imagine them in the transporter room when Scotty's false teeth get coughed out into the beam, recombining in an unholy act of dentistry with the Away Team who are also turned inside out and bounced like learner drivers about the surface of an inhospitable planet, screaming in fear and deadly rage as they materialise and disappear again. This is how TimeSplitters look and act. Oh, they also fire nasty bolts of rebounding electricity, definitely not set to stun. We really don't want to give them our planet for a litter tray.
But TimeSplitters are just the sharp end of the adversarial iceberg. Cortez, and various companions from the advancing eras through which he chases elusive time crystals, must also take on zombies, ghosts, giant worms, bad boffins, uniformed henchmen, killer droids, helicopter gunships and genetically modified hybrids. Future Perfect really is the variety pack of shooters, although more Sainsbury's own than a unique brand, being perhaps the most derivative game ever made. Somehow though, this TimeSplitters sequel turns derivation into inspiration without breaking its fast gait. It's like a day trip to a fantastic amusement park. You know exactly which thrilling rides are going to be there and you've ridden most of them a few times before, but this doesn't stop you from running between their themed delights (ghost, medieval, space, runaway train, waterworld, etc) with childish anticipation and afterwards stepping off into a solid cutscene with the pleasant afterglow of adrenaline well spent.
Unfortunately there are more than just temporal anomalies in Future Perfect and it's a shame the developers themselves don't have the benefit of time travel to iron out a few niggling gameplay wrinkles. It's more than a little galling to lose most of your weapons without explanation as you move between areas of the same level in a lift, this obvious conceit dragging you heavily out of the game world. The big boss fights are too basic and it's far too easy to exploit level design and defeat them from behind cover. Where this is impossible it's still just a question of pounding them with all you have until they drop, and a few target overlays, or weak spot areas, do not make these battles tactical enough.
This future isn't perfect and occasional technical glitches such as harpoons embedding their arrowheads in surface textures of deep water and significant slowdown during busy fights leave the game with an unpolished finish. The decision not to include a jump button, a terrible reverse camera when driving vehicles and the erratic positioning of some guards adds to the sense that this sequel needed to feel just a little more love.
There are even one or two level-breaking bugs where forcefields that should power down sometimes remain stubbornly alert, barring progress or retreat and necessitating a reload from the last automatic save point. These auto-saves are not always best positioned and in one or two places where the difficulty curve suddenly points as heavenward as a monk on Viagra (sniping invisible TimeSplitters for example), you're punished further by having to try and try again from way back down the road. These are the tiny stones in the new trainers that aren't painful enough to stop you running, but are irksome annoyances that should really have been shaken out before you started. And they are enough to keep Future Perfect from joining TimeSplitters 2 (Issue 09, 9.3) in the ranks of the OXM Elite.
Nevertheless, this is still a game well worth owning and the diversity of the single-player settings, beauty of the gently cartoon graphics and relentless "you have got to see this!" humour, cannot be praised enough. And Future Perfect goes aeons beyond the single-player Story game, with a wealth of online and offline modes, including 15 great maps and 13 fun modes for Xbox Live play, plus a brilliant mapmaker to make it genuinely timeless. With a potentially unlimited number of user-designed maps that can be shared over Xbox Live and even user-generated stories with scripted AI events, this game has the longevity of Rasputin and should spawn one of the liveliest online communities yet. Few videogames have embraced Xbox Live in such an extraordinarily enthusiastic clinch and we're sure the attraction will be mutual.
Offline, Future Perfect is more than generous. Arcade mode features one of the biggest bundles of bot battles we've ever seen, with 13 modes that range from vanilla Deathmatch to the multi-scoop knickerbocker delights of Vampire (kill others to extend your lifespan), Shrink (your size is based on ranking) and Virus (stay alive for as long as you can once set on fire). The bots display decent intelligence and put up a fair and very challenging fight that's certainly a distracting alternative to Xbox Live matches. More offline mayhem is offered in split-screen Co-op mode where you can play through the single-player game with a mate. And you will need help, because the enemies become significantly tougher when double-teaming. Challenges represent one of the most eclectic collections of offline mini-games ever devised and include the increasingly hilarious bottle-shoot, monkey disco and stuffed cat race, which really has to be seen to be believed.
While TimeSplitters: Future Perfect does little new in the main single-player game and has definitely been stitched up absent-mindedly, leaving a few unwanted artefacts beneath the skin, it remains enormous fun, spoofing its own genre wonderfully, changing locations and gameplay so frequently that anyone who can claim boredom at any point would probably yawn if fired at the moon on the back of a great white shark.
The longevity offered by the mapmaker and extensive unlockable offline and Live options make it great value and months down the line you'll still get funny looks on the bus as you remember parts of the game and chuckle to yourself. Just don't explain to a stranger that you were thinking of the mewl that a stuffed cat makes when you corner it too hard. And don't forget the 15-rated playable demo can be found on this month's disc!
TOCA RACE DRIVER
A top-notch racer that doesn't need its tacked-on storyline. Still, the racing is thrilling
Driving - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 8.5/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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TOCA.txtRead Review
The TOCA series has sold more than four million copies since its humble beginnings on the PSone. There's a good reason for that - people love to feel like they're thrashing an expensive motor to within an inch of its life, to expertly guide a car around a track on the edge of control.
TOCA has always replicated that feeling better than most, and the fact that Touring Car events feature production models means you can associate yourself with the action that much more. What better way to relieve the frustration of your dawdle home behind a milkfloat than to sit in a virtual replica of your car and thrash it for a change? TOCA grants you that freedom.
This is the first appearance of the TOCA Race Driver series on Xbox. The cars are all here, with up to 20 glistening automobiles on each track. And those tracks are as accurate as you'd expect, with favourites such as Donington and Brands Hatch present and correct.
But this time there's a whole lot of this Ryan McKane bloke. Who he?
The big change with TOCA Race Driver is that all the racing action is wrapped up in a big fat story, and how you feel about that will likely dictate your enjoyment of the game. Days of Thunder fans will probably be champing at the bit.
The player is cast as Ryan McKane, the youngest of two brothers whose famous racing driver dad was killed in a race when Ryan was a nipper. Those of a grisly disposition will be chuffed to hear that you get to see the horror crash when you load up the disc.
The whole game is organised around the fact that you're Ryan - you get him a job on a racing team, before getting him into bigger and better racing series and teams. In the options screen, you are Ryan lounging around the office, checking your email for job offers and getting your car sorted out to your liking.
It's not exactly Shenmue with cars, but it is more in-depth than the dressing supplied by last month's Racing Evoluzione (Issue 14, 7.3). As you win races more options open up, and you get to decide which team you want to race with. You also get rivals, and a large number of cutscenes, which are cheesier than a daytime soap opera.
The main thing is the racing, though, and that upholds the fine tradition set by previous TOCAs. The handling is firmly on the side of realism. You need to brake well before tight corners to have any chance of staying on the Tarmac, but it's also all too easy to brake too hard and lock up the wheels, making it impossible to steer yourself around. It means you have to approach the racing in a serious manner, gradually closing the gap between yourself and the guy in front, and braking later to squeeze past on the inside. It can be tough, but it's also pretty thrilling.
This realism means it's a mission to get around a track without bashing your car up. But inadvertently crunching your car does at least give you the opportunity to see the excellent damage system in action. If your control skills are more Maureen from Driving School than Michael Schumacher, your precious motor will soon be left looking like a reject from the scrapper's yard. Body panels, bumpers and glass fly all over the place, and are left all over the track to be hit on the next lap. It makes it feel like you're driving on the limit, and adds a feeling of danger, especially since your car can be damaged beyond repair if you treat it too badly. You didn't want that gearbox, did you sir?
But the best thing about the racing, and the thing that separates TOCA from the likes of Racing Evoluzione, Gran Turismo and even Project Gotham Racing (Issue 01, 8.9), is the fact that it actually feels like racing. Many racing games serve up a dull procession of AI cars. There are hardly any of them, and they never deviate from the racing line. There's no illusion of competition, and it makes it dull.
TOCA does things differently. For a start, each race has loads of cars on the track, making the road fuller than Ben after a KFC family bucket. Even better, those cars actually race. They race you, they race each other. They crash into you, they crash into each other. When they mess up, the resulting pile ups might fill the road, making you smack into them, or you might be able to swerve past to gain an easy couple of places. And their cars are just as fragile as your own, so don't be surprised to see an opponent's car falling to bits as you get further into a race.
The AI of the CPU vehicles means you feel like you're engaged in a proper race, instead of a leisurely pootle on a Sunday afternoon. Combined with the realistic feel, the sheer number of cars on the track means TOCA Race Driver offers some of the best racing on Xbox since MotoGP (Issue 04, 8.9). The only slight problem is that for experienced TOCA players, it can take a little while before the races get as tough as you might like. But then that's a chance to bag a few championship points before others start to fight you for them...
TOCA has the visuals to back up the gameplay, too. It may not be the most amazing game to look at from screenshots, but in full flight it's admirable - it's very smooth, and the draw distance stretches way ahead. This is crucial, because it means you can see corners approaching when they're still a few seconds away, and see opponents catching you up in the distance before they're right on your tail.
The car models excel themselves, as well. They're not the most detailed ones we've seen, but given that there are up to 20 on the track at once, and each can fall apart and spray glass all over the place, they're damn impressive. The tracks themselves also look good, and the whole game is more colourful than previous games in the series, too.
The sensory pleasure continues when it comes to sound. The angry noise of a powerful engine being pushed has been recreated brilliantly here. The in-car view already conveys an excellent sense of speed, but when you have the engine screaming in your ears at the same time, it's even more impressive. The tinkling of broken lights and scraping of panels sounds suitably expensive and nasty too. The intensity of the racing is massively heightened if you've got a decent sound setup.
But TOCA's not quite the perfect car racer. It's a shame that there's no System Link or Live support, given the quality of the racing - it's a real missed opportunity. The Xbox version is coming some half a year after the PS2 original, so we'd hoped some form of full-screen multiplayer would have made it into the final version.
And then there's the Ryan McKane-based presentation. It doesn't get in the way as much as we'd feared it might, but even so it's not a particularly successful experiment. The main problem with it is that Ryan's not a particularly likeable bloke. He's a bit like Poochy the Dog in that old episode of The Simpsons - designed to be someone you can relate to, but actually a bit cringe worthy. We'd rather just get on with the racing in our own name than worry about some yank guy with a point to prove.
Overall, though, Ryan's attitude doesn't spoil things because the racing is among the best we've sampled on Xbox. Hurtling along a narrow, downhill stretch of road while hassling an opponent for a way past, with bits falling off the car... it's truly exhilarating. And if a racer manages that, it's got to be a bit special, hasn't it?
TOCA RACE DRIVER 2
The most realistic and detailed racer ever. Gorgeous graphics, incredible variety and handling
Racing - Issue 29 (May 2004) - 9.1/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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TOCA2.txtRead Review
Xbox is fast becoming (if it isn't already) the racing gamer's console of choice, thanks to a high-pressure flow of cutting-edge games that looks far from drying up. Chances are you've already dealt with Project Gotham Racing 2 (Issue 23, 9.3) and are back on the market looking for a new 200mph experience. And there's no question that this is it.
The online-enabled TOCA Race Driver 2 has got it all. There are well over 30 completely different championships to race in, around 56 circuits to know and learn like the back of your hand, and a collection of high-powered cars that'll keep your motor running for months. All of this is wrapped up in an incredible blaze of visual glory that's unmatched by any racing game on any console - which is probably why it's exclusive to Xbox.
The TOCA series has always been known for its attention to super-realistic detail. As a racer it's about as far removed from the likes of Project Gotham as you can get. For a start, you can damage all the cars beyond repair... and you will. Without even trying. We guarantee it. It's as hard as nails too, but we don't shy away from a challenge and we suspect you don't either. We didn't really know what to think of the Ultimate Racing Simulator tagline but, after shredding rubber in zillions of different race types, we now fully understand where Codemasters is coming from. It does exactly what it says on the tin.
The Career mode is truly immense and will seriously eat into your free time and quite possibly even your work time too. Now when we heard it stuck to a scripted narrative, we didn't know what to expect. After all, a racing game is about racing and nothing else in our book. But once again we were surprised. The story element brings in new characters, challenges, cars and rivals. Each championship is preceded by a snappy cutscene that drives your charge for the racing crown forward. And in keeping with the rest of the game's optical splendour, they're some of the best cutscenes we've ever had to sit through. But, should you seriously shunt a driver during a race, you may end up getting screamed at in front of your pit. Remember - where there's blame, there's a claim. What you do on the track directly affects the way your story's told.
No sooner have you jumped into your new motor and belted up than you're thrown headfirst into in a quick few laps in a brand spanking new Ford GT, where your manager drops a few hints about how to control the car. Brake in a straight line, don't wheelspin or crash... the usual things a driving instructor would tell you before letting you loose on the track. Once the practice race is over, it's on with the charge. Things begin a bit on the slow side but soon progress to warp speed, especially when you hit the Formula 1 beasts.
You get to choose your own racing adventure by selecting which type of race to go for. Often you'll have specific objectives to accomplish rather than just coming first all the time. For example, you might have to finish no more than three places behind a specific rival, or gain a certain number of points in order to impress sponsors. This approach definitely works and keeps things nice and fresh, as having to win every single race right from the beginning would have you pulling your hair out in no time. Allowing players to choose which class of car they race next was also a good move.
It's hard driving, though. There'll be no bouncing off the cars in front to cheekily steal a few places on the grid here. We quickly learnt to our cost that too much of this Gotham-style approach really does break the car and get you nowhere pretty damn fast. Instead, it's all about the racing line and taking corners the best way you can, because if you spin off the track, the dream's all over.
Thanks to a nifty little Terminal Damage Engine, the cars break and bend like you've never seen before. A selection of icons appears around the speed dial warning you that things aren't going well. Even the engine starts screaming in pain when you push it too much after a bump or two. You'll have to go easy, because if you haven't got the skills to pay the bills, your budding racing career won't get very far at all.
The sheer scale of the variety and handling system employed in TOCA Race Driver 2 is second to none. You can challenge friends and Live subscribers to every race mode from the single-player game. If you prefer your racing on the realistic side (and you like a challenge) then you won't go far wrong with this. It really is the ultimate racing simulator. Quite simply, this is the most detailed racer we've ever had the pleasure of taking on the track. A must for any racing enthusiast.
TOCA RACE DRIVER 3
The kind of four-wheel action that'd cause an even bigger bulge in Jeremy Clarkson's ill-fitting 1970s jeans
Racing - Issue 52 (February 2006) - 9.2/10
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toca3.txt
TOEJAM & EARL III: MISSION TO EARTH
A very enjoyable platformer for both newbies and veterans alike
Platformer - Issue 13 (February 2003) - 7.9/10
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Toe.txtRead Review
To some of you, toejam is little more than an Americanism for the icky black stuff that can be found residing in the nooks and crannies of feet that haven't seen a bath for a while. But to others, ToeJam was the three-legged rapping alien that alongside partner Big Earl was a surprise success on the Sega Mega Drive some ten years ago.
The original game saw the two aliens scurrying around earth searching for parts to fix their crashed spaceship so they could return to their home planet of Funkotron. It was a refreshingly different style of platform game rammed with off-the-wall humour, a great soundtrack, an original story and, most importantly, a style that was all of its own.
The sequel, Panic on Funkotron, saw the two having to capture stowaway Earthlings that had hitched a lift on their return journey to Funkotron. It was the same zany collect-'em-all platform recipe, but it was still funny so nobody cared and everybody loved it.
But like most successful double acts, the hapless duo eventually got put out to pasture as popularity shifted to the Next Big Thing. And poor old TJ&E were soon consigned to the Sega hall of fame alongside Wonder Boy and James Pond. But with this new outing, the boys once again step up to the mike and state their case. The question is, are we still listening?
If there were such a thing as the Ten Commandments of gaming, then written in stone just underneath "Thou shall not make poor quality licence conversions" would be the mantra that platform games need an original approach if they want to be a success.
Through no fault of its own, the genre just doesn't have the immediacy of first person shooters or beat-'em ups. Nor does it have the excitement of driving games or the competitiveness of sports titles. As a consequence, platform titles need to work hard to get gamers' respect. Characters need to be original and engaging. Gameplay needs to be as varied as possible. And each title needs its own unique hook to reel us punters in.
Mario had the imagination and playability, Sonic had the speed and the crazy tracks, and Blinx had the innovative time control feature. So what can ToeJam and Earl offer us in their new instalment ToeJam and Earl III: Mission to Earth?
In a nutshell: Playability, humour, a fun 2-player mode, downloadable content and a shining example of how an old dog that may not know many new tricks can still be good fun to have around if his coat gets a polish.
If you're new to the TJ&E universe then the storyline is a good indication of the kind of game you'll be getting yourself into. Lamont, the Funkapotomus and source of all funk in the known universe, is missing the 12 albums of funk. ToeJam, Earl and new female character Latisha are sent to Earth to hunt down the missing LPs. During their quest, they encounter a disturbance in the funk caused by their arch enemy, the Anti-Funk - the evil mastermind behind the missing albums.
The game is of the 3D "collect-'em all" variety and is split into multiple game zones, each with a different environment such as a desert zone and a snow zone. The maps are a collection of aerial islands that can often be traversed via bridges or teleports. To unlock zones you have to win Gate Battles that either involve battling an anti-funk villain or completing a typically wacky objective like funkifying giant chickens.
In order to enter a Gate Battle you need to have a certain number of microphones, which are only available by successfully completing missions, of which there's a handful in each zone. Missions (that also tend to involve either collecting or unlocking things) can be accessed by collecting keys, which can be found in each general zone area and are also earned from the missions themselves.
Sound confusing? It's not really, as the items you need to collect are often very clearly displayed, even when there's a lot happening on screen. But what can be mind-boggling is the number of presents you have at your disposal. Presents can be collected or bought, and act as tools to help you on your quest. As the game progresses, you will collect dozens of different types of present that can be selected from a menu option and are often a ton of fun to use.
But what makes TJ&E feel unique is its style. From the gospel choir cutscenes that mask the loading times and harmonise the forthcoming mission objectives, to the sandwich board clad muscle-man who berates you for not beefing up the game with downloadable content via Xbox Live - TJ&E III has a very strong personality. In fact, it's something approaching a cross between Ali G and James Brown on laughing gas, as the humour is all "a'ight" or "feel the funk". And with strong personalities everywhere, you'll either love or loathe them.
Graphically, TJ&E is very pleasing to the eye. The textures are highly detailed and are complemented by atmospheric lighting that accurately reflects time passing from day to night - which brings out a whole host of different bad guys to deal with. The game is filled with nice touches and the multi coloured reflection of a sunrise over a frozen lake in the snowy zone is an example of how this old-fashioned game has been given a proper next-generation polishing.
Handling is very intuitive, with an independent camera that can be used via the Right thumbstick. The two-player option works well, with both characters sharing the same screen when in close proximity and then switching to split-screen when further apart.
But the experience, though generally enjoyable, stumbles over the old hurdle of gameplay repetition. The variety of presents, different characters and enemies, and the overall TJ&E style can't fully camouflage the repetitive mission objectives. It may be a little unavoidable in this genre, but you'll find that after a while it all starts to become a little too similar.
But the repetition isn't a game-breaker and doesn't stop this from shining as an enjoyable and highly playable platformer. Looking for innovation? Look elsewhere. But looking for a stylish and playable platform game? Let ToeJam and Earl funk you up.
TOM CLANCY'S RAINBOW SIX 3: BLACK ARROW
Looks stunning, sounds ace, and it's amazingly atmospheric. Massive multiplayer potential and great level design
FPS - Issue 33 (September 2004) - 9.0/10 - Xbox Live features *****
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TomR632.txtRead Review
By the time you read this review, you should have already gunned your way through our exclusive playable demo and eyeballed every single sentence to death in our Exclusive Access feature in last month's issue. Rainbow Six 3 has got everything Tom Clancy's famed Ghost Recon series hasn't, which you might think is not a lot, but let us assure you that this is where the future of squad-based action lies - especially online or over System Link.
Little has changed in the final version compared to the build we hammered last month. There's a lot more vocal activity in there now, especially from the hostages and terrorists. Hostages will now shout at you not to leave them alone after you've secured them and the area, while terrorists scream and shout like a bunch of teens in an American horror movie. Granted, terrorists only scream like girls when you blow holes in their bodies, so we'll forgive them for that. Even your team-mates shout out to let you know what's going on, and more importantly where.
The game's setup is similar to that of Ghost Recon. You can choose to play through a meaty campaign with a politically themed storyline, or opt to play a variety of quick missions with the usual variables such as map type, game type and difficulty settings. Three difficulty levels (Recruit, Veteran and Elite) are also presented in the Campaign mode and as you've probably already guessed, it's quite a challenge whatever level you choose (nothing compared to the rock hard PC version, mind you). Easy isn't easy and Hard doesn't come anywhere close to doing this level of difficulty justice. But a Clancy game just wouldn't be the same without the pain. You love it and so do we.
As team leader Ding Chavez, you get to command an elite squad of special operatives against all manner of terrorist foes. Usually they come clad in really bad Hawaiian beach bum shirts, or sport George Michael stubble and shades. This makes you want to hit them more though, which is good. Because you play the role of team leader, if you get it in the face, it's game over. No one else is skilled enough to lead the charge, so make sure you don't get shot. Sending in your guys first and mopping up the dregs is a class tactic. There's no shame in hiding. Controlling team-mates is as simple as pressing A in the direction you want them to move.
The third instalment in the series takes you across the globe, visiting locations from London to the Cayman Islands and everywhere in between. The overall goal is to stop a madman (dead) in his tracks before his doomsday plot is realised. Some of our favourite locales include the meat factory, oil tanker, and a very wealthy CEO's house. The variation in settings is truly amazing and helps keep the game nice and fresh. You never feel like you're covering the same ground twice.
Each level is pretty linear and straightforward. You won't ever find yourself getting lost or not knowing what to do next. Objectives are continually updated and a handy little map labels where your next target is - be it a bomb to defuse, a hostage to secure or a phone to bug. If you just follow your nose, you'll always find more trouble to deal with.
During the pre-mission briefing you can opt to pick out your own weapons and accessories, though we found the standard weapons for every level very entertaining and this way you get to know each weapon of massive destruction. There's also a shipment of different grenades to choose from that'll bring tears to the eyes of your enemies and blind them for life. Over the course of the game you'll have to defuse bombs, capture key members of the terrorist organisation you're up against, hack into laptops to steal information and rescue hostages caught in the crossfire.
There's never a dull moment in the single-player game, and this translates beautifully into the multiplayer arena. There's no split-screen action but those of you with access to System Link, or better still, Xbox Live, will lose countless hours of your life never to be found again. You can team up against each other or the terrorists, in modes such as Mission, Survival, Terrorist Hunt, Team Survival and Sharpshooter. All of which pretty much do what they say on the tin. You'll also be able to download new maps soon after the game's gone on sale. Bonus.
Rainbow Six 3 is the ultimate package for fans of realism-based first-person shooting. It looks great, sounds incredible and the action is relentless. It holds a great single-player game but fire up multiplayer and you'll be in FPS heaven. It's the best shooter of the year. Go! Go! Go!
TOM CLANCY'S GHOST RECON
Confident and addictive. The strategy/action benchmark
Squad-based shooter - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 8.9/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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TomClancyGR.txtRead Review
You're on your belly trying to read a map. The rain's coming down hard and visibility is so poor your sniper can't see 15 feet in front of his face. You move forward a few yards to try and get a better vantage point from the ridge ahead. Big mistake. All hell breaks loose. Bullets ricochet in the dirt around you, and the sickening thud of a round making contact with flesh and bone makes you fire blindly in panic. You need to do something quickly. You've got one man dead and another wounded - the wildlife will eat well tonight if you stay here any longer. Your other squad is a few clicks to the west; can you get them to provide cover quick enough? Welcome to Ghost Recon, the only Xbox game that has so far managed to capture the action, suspense and strategy of modern-day guerrilla warfare - and then made the whole experience Xbox Live-compatible. Bye-bye social life, hello Alpha team.
And now Recon returns as a stand-alone mission disc, meaning you don't need the first game to play this new instalment. Out goes the ultra-nationalist Russian scenario of the first offering, and in comes a near future vision of Cuba. In 2006 Castro smoked one too many cigars and turned his toes up; since then a succession of thugs have been in charge but now democracy has started to take its first few tentative steps, and with a full-blown election around the corner your job is to ensure the people have the right to be heard without gunfire drowning out their freedom of speech.
For any of you unlucky enough not to be familiar with the first title, here's a quick overview. Ghost Recon is a first-person squad-based shooter where you control two three-man teams who can either be individually switched between or controlled as a unit by the use of a map screen. This means if you have split objectives to the east and west of the playfield, you can command one team yourself while sending the other squad to clear out the trouble on the other side. The mix of strategy and action works extremely well as you won't be spending any longer than a couple of moments in the map screen before resuming your role as a first-person killing machine.
Island Thunder provides an eight-mission single-player campaign where you'll travel between the jungle, the beaches and the city during your Cuban tour of duty. The multiple mission objectives are the same as the first title, as is the gameplay - go there, kill bad guys, grab an item or secure an area and skidaddle, sharpish. But it's not always a meal for one. You can also play split-screen, System Link and ultimately Xbox Live - where this title is transformed from a solid off the shelf release into an insanely addictive online experience. Many of the new additions are tailored towards online play, including eight new multiplayer maps and four favourites from the original title - so you won't be missing out on the most popular maps if you don't have the first game. We'll have more to say on online play when the game hits the high street and we can really get in the thick of it.
This mission disc does what it says on the tin. It's the same game with some promising online bells and whistles. But if the original left you cold, so will this. The graphics are pretty much the same with slightly better character detail and a bit more colour, but the playfield textures still lack the level of polish we expect to see at this level. But thanks to fantastically atmospheric sound effects the illusion of tense combat is never broken. It's a testament to the excellent gameplay that the visuals are really an afterthought when wrapped up in the whole combat experience. And the punchline? It's 20 quid - half the price of many games that are only half as good. Go buy it.
TOM CLANCY'S GHOST RECON: ISLAND THUNDER
Atmospheric with online play
Squad-based shooter - Issue 21 (October 2003) - 8.5/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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Recon2.txtRead Review
Crouching on our knees in dark corners while flanked by three uniformed men isn't usually the kind of thing we go in for here at Official Xbox Magazine. But, in the case of the Tom Clancy tactical shooter series, we're willing to make an exception.
Set during a fictional conflict between a mad North Korean general and the West, Ghost Recon 2 signifies something of a departure from the slow-paced, tactical gameplay we have come to expect from these games. For starters, you can play from an all-new third-person perspective (though you can still play in first-person if you prefer), while the faster, more arcade-orientated action is caught somewhere in limbo between the gritty realism of its predecessor (Issue 21, 8.5) and the Rainbow Six series, and the more forgiving and frenetic skirmishes of Conflict: Vietnam (Issue 34, 8.5).
But does it work? Well, yes and no. While this new direction may well appeal to a wider audience, its execution is more suspect than a convicted murderer called Bill the Butcher standing over a corpse with a bloody knife crying, "The bastard had it comin'!"
Typically, there are three different types of missions on offer in the campaign. First off are the squad-based infiltration levels, where you and your team must enter enemy-held territory and either blow up key targets or rescue captured/crashed comrades.
Things start well enough as you creep silently through the crumbling, smoke-spewing (though graphically unimpressive) cities of Korea, or its rural locales, your eyes straining in their sockets as you seek to identify the slightest hint of enemy presence in your grainy surroundings.
However, as soon as you take down a couple of enemies, things really start to kick off, as countless more enemies flock towards you and begin raining down a maelstrom of lead on your position, barking orders and warnings to each other as they try to pin you down.
You fight back, taking down enemies with precision shots and watching them slump realistically to the ground, while issuing orders to your squad on the fly with the excellent new context-sensitive command system, or via voice commands with a headset. The battle swings violently back and forth as your men and the enemy intelligently seek out cover and lay down suppressing fire. What's more, if one of your soldiers gets injured you can now heal them on the battlefield.
But suddenly, without warning, your entire squad is wiped out by an unseen attacker. You reload. It happens again. And again. Then it dawns on you. You've stumbled upon a spawn point. Enemies materialise out of thin air, behind you, in front of you, giving you no time to react. Of course this would be bearable if the game's damage model reflected its new frenetic approach. Sadly, neither you nor your men can take more than a handful of shots before you drop, making moments like these utterly infuriating. It also totally negates any carefully planned tactics you may have employed.
Solo infiltration missions are just like the squad-based ones, only even harder (because you have no backup, obviously). In order to level the playing field a little, you're kitted out with the revolutionary Integrated Warrior System (IWS), replete with a machine-gun that lets you fire round corners without exposing yourself and kick-ass grenade launcher. It also proffers you with the added bonus of being able to call in airstrikes.
These missions are the highlights of Ghost Recon 2, oozing tension like a ruptured dam and testing your reflexes, tactical awareness and shot accuracy to the max. With no backup to rely on, you're forced to think about every move and its consequence and, when faced with multiple enemies, a keen understanding of your surroundings will prove invaluable. Especially if you don't want some Korean conscript's niece using your intestines as a skipping rope before the day is out.
Conversely though, the shortcomings of the squad-based missions are amplified here, necessitating constant reloads as seemingly endless waves of enemies charge at you, even when you're well hidden. But the enemy AI isn't consistently this good, oh no, no, no. Sometimes it doesn't see you at all. Even if you're standing right in front of it. Waving a red flag. Dancing the Macarena.
Last and definitely least are the defensive missions. Brainless to the extreme, these task you and your squad to defend a base by moving from one trench to the next while gunning down endless droves of advancing enemies and immobilising the odd tank and APC. It's the kind of archaic, by-numbers, lazy level design that would leave a lobotomised chimp feeling patronised.
Of course if you don't fancy trawling through the campaign, you can embark on single missions in a variety of game modes including Lone Wolf (you're on your own but have access to the best weaponry) and Firefight (kill every enemy in the entire level). But regardless of which one you choose, the same problems still abound.
Fortunately, the rather patchy single-player game is redeemed somewhat by its diverse and entertaining multiplayer options. Cram yourself and up to three mates in front of your TV or link up with up to 15 other players over Xbox Live and revel in the joys of co-operative or competitive play, shouting abuse or praise at each other through your headsets. Ah, the joys of modern technology.
Ghost Recon 2 is a game with a severe identity crisis, clearly trying to appeal to the action-loving masses while attempting not to alienate fans of the slow-paced gameplay of yore. Problem is, it's unlikely to truly grip either group, and may well estrange many core fans. Suddenly, the idea of being stuck in those dark corners protecting our rears simply isn't as appealing as it used to be.
TOM CLANCY'S GHOST RECON 2
As frustrating as it is rewarding. Best enjoyed with friends, though you'll still have to endure the erratic AI
Squad-based shooter - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 7.4/10
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TomClancyGR2.txtRead Review
We're not going to mislead you. We've been waiting ages for this game to sneak into the office - under the cover of nightfall - patiently lying in wait for us to arrive the next day. In reality, the game actually turned up courtesy of a grumpy courier, but that's pretty much the only disappointment Ghost Recon has delivered in its tour of duty of our HQ.
The first Xbox game to roll from the typewriter of a certain Mr Tom Clancy is a spectacle indeed. Set in the not-too-distant future (2008), the premise is a tried and tested Clancy narrative involving Russian ultra-nationalists looking to rebuild the long-defunct Soviet empire by reclaiming independent territories as their own.
As the title suggests, you play the lead in a specialist team of US Green Berets nicknamed 'Ghosts' - not because of their tendency to run around in white sheets like modern-day Caspers, but because they move swiftly, silently and are practically invisible to the enemy.
Invisibility is a skill you will wish you had mastered at Ghost school, because throughout this game you'll be kissing the ground more often than the Pope on a field trip. You take control of a group of six soldiers, split evenly into two teams (imaginatively called Alpha and Bravo). At the touch of a button you can quickly switch from one man to another, and prior to beginning a mission you can chose the speciality of each soldier - Sniper, Rifleman, Support (heavy weapons) and Demolitions. Each soldier type plays a key role in your chance of mission success, and in this game variety is not just the spice but indeed the necessary requirement of life.
Tactical squad shooters usually either pass or fail largely depending on the control mechanics and ease of squad management. As far as control goes, Ghost Recon hits the target dead centre. Sure, no controller will beat a mouse in terms of twitchy FPS response but, in truth, Red Storm has done a sterling job in translating a keyboard/mouse mechanism to a pad.
In-game control is sensitive, fluid and intuitive, which means you won't be standing rigidly upright in a hail of bullets for very long before instinctively dropping to your belly, zooming in and squeezing off a few rounds.
Squad management is also a relatively simple affair. Previous PC-based Clancy titles had the tiresome trait of having to spend a lot of time pre-mission in planning your teams' direction and objectives. Not so here - all planning can be done on the ground through a pretty simple map and management screen.
Ghost Recon's variety of commands is fairly limited, but in our view the simple approach doesn't detract from the action or hamper the strategy involved in commanding two teams that could be achieving mission objectives on opposite sides of the playfield. Admittedly, you may need a third thumb to navigate through a few of the command options and occasional pathing problems crop up, especially in enclosed spaces like buildings, but in general the right balance is struck between action and strategy.
The main meat of the one-player experience is found in the story-led Campaign mode. The missions are quite diverse, or at least as diverse as you're ever going to get in an army game. Rescue hostages, take out camps, clear out a cave network to grab a valuable prisoner - the variety of stuff to do and the generally expansive environments in which to do it ensure you don't get bored of the gameplay.
Visually, the game is like a wannabe model - good looking without being a stunner. The attention to detail of the soldiers is excellent and all the squad members look distinctively different and are animated well. The only gripe is really with the maps. They can be a bit sparse at times, and there is more than enough fog travelling over some levels to hint at a little inadequacy on the draw distance front. But this title doesn't need to break new graphical ground in order for it to be a success; it's all about tension, suspense and controlled aggression.
If you fancy an instant, gratifying hit, then Quick missions are available that come in four possible flavours: Firefight, Recon, Mission and Defend. There is also a split-screen two-player mode, System Link play and the glorious possibility of Xbox Live.
As far as Xbox Live is concerned, well, as we said in the first sentence, we're not going to mislead you. Although we have our shiny new Live kits, we're not able to play online Recon just yet, so we can only guess at how good it is.
But there is no reason to think that online play will be anything less than an added advantage to an already compelling, challenging and competent strategy shooter. We'll be taking a retrospective look at Live-enabled games once the network is fully up and running; so lock and load, boys and girls.
TOM CLANCY'S GHOST RECON ADVANCED WARFIGHTER
Tactical shooting Clancy-style - so realistic and absorbing you'll be ducking in your chair
FPS - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 9.0/10
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reconaw.txtRead Review
In 2013, Mexico City becomes a sun-scorched battlefield where death lurks around every corner. Armed terrorists in dark alleys and on rooftops fill the air with a tense, sinister mood as you creep cautiously through deserted city streets, ready for a deadly shootout at any second. This is Ghost Recon Advanced Warfighter - an ultra-absorbing FPS that will really take you there.
Terrorists have seized the city and kidnapped the Mexican president, turning the whole place into a warzone. Obviously, the Ghosts are the guys called in to clean up this mess, and that's where you come in. This game grabs you by the scruff of the neck and yanks you into its world. With the inside-the-helmet view, you can see the dirt on your soldier's visor, and you can hear his breathing and heartbeat. When your man gets shot, you can almost feel his pain as the visor flickers and becomes grainy, and colours go a washed-out grey. After the arcadey feel of Ghost Recon 2 (Issue 36, 7.4), which had you running around in third-person blasting big guns without a care in the world, Advanced Warfighter pulls the series back to a gritty level of realism, but without the tedious strategy and dreary pace of the original (Issue 21, 8.5). It's like a hybrid of the two.
The pace of levels balances subdued caution and stealth with frequent moments of high-octane shooting and large-scale destruction. You advance through the urban environments with extreme care and observation. Open city environments mean hostiles can come at you from any angle. Dark alleys aren't your only worries - with ladders opening access to rooftops, you have to search high as well as low in your hunt for danger. As always, Ghost Recon is unforgiving of careless play - you can be shot dead in a second, sometimes before you even see your attacker. It's harsh, but that's what makes Advanced Warfighter so tense.
The game uses lighting to further enhance this tension, with particular focus on the intense sunlight. Remember, Mexico City is close to the Earth's equator. The sun's glare can sometimes be blinding, making it difficult to see enemies in the distance. You can't cheat and turn the brightness down on your TV either, because this burning light is contrasted by incredibly dark shadows. It a bit like when you walk from a sunny outdoors into your house and everything appears extra dark. This makes overcast alleys just as blinding as the sun's glare, and an ideal hiding spot for sneaky terrorists.
It can be tough going, but you've more than enough technology to help you out. The game's 2012 setting allows the makers to throw in some cooler gear along with the usual rifles and body armour. In previews of Ghost Recon, Ubisoft spoke proudly of the technology used by soldiers in GRAW, and it got us quite excited. Weapons are based on real military prototypes - they're lighter, more accurate, hold more rounds and have a quicker rate of fire than today's weapons, which is very cool. Admittedly, when you're playing you forget about all that stuff, but you have to respect its realism.
Your high-tech helmet is the hub of all your abilities as an Advanced Warfighter. It's linked to an advanced satellite system that provides two functions. The first, and most useful, is a detailed radar located at the top right of your screen. This shows the layout of local buildings and tracks any enemies you or your squadmate have seen. This is what makes scoping out your surroundings so important - if you haven't physically seen a hostile, your radar won't detect them. But this is nothing new - GRAW may go to the effort of explaining the superfluous technology behind it, but it's essentially just a radar as seen in countless videogames before.
Your satellite technology also provides a small visor on the right of your screen. For most of the game, this displays your squad-mate's point of view, which is interesting enough, but its practical use is limited. If your squadmate goes missing you can take a peek at what he's getting up to, but that's about it. The visor is too small and too grainy to any enemies he's focused on, and they'll all appear on your radar anyway.
But Advanced Warfighter makes more constructive use of the visor in missions where you control a remotely operated reconnaissance drone. A small spy camera relays a video feed directly to the visor on your HUD, enabling you to inspect hostile-infested areas and gather intelligence from a safe distance. The visor also allows you to communicate with choppers, tanks and sniper units that occasionally offer their assistance. You just aim at the target you want made dead and hit the D-pad to send the order through. But you will only have such helpful assistance in specific parts of your missions. For the rest - the large majority of of the game - you'll have to make good use of your squadmate to survive the harsh battlefield.
Unlike previous Ghost Recon games, you only have one partner to attend to (as opposed to a whole team as before), so you can concentrate your efforts on using him to his full potential. Controlling him is easy - knowing how to use him effectively is trickier. Before you move anywhere it's a good idea to order him to go on ahead to test the water before you jump in. If it's hot, his gunfire (or violent death) will alert you to the danger that awaits.
As well as telling him where to stand, you can also switch your squadmate between Stealth and Assault modes with a simple tap of the Y button. But you have to analyse your situation to use this function properly. When you've multiple enemies to deal with you'll want him in Assault mode, which makes him attack any hostile upon sight. He's smart enough to lob grenades when necessary and use fixed gun turrets where possible - although he can sometimes get a little carried away and wander off to do some headhunting. If you don't order him back quickly he usually ends up biting off more than he can chew.
But when the situation calls for a more subtle approach, you'll want your squadmate in Stealth mode, when he'll try to stay low and only shoot when shot at. It adds an extra layer of strategy to the game, without being overly geeky about it. But generally, the main strategy is all about caution and positioning. When things are quiet, it's all about keeping your eyes peeled and your back covered.
Then the game picks up the pace and you have to make some quick strategic decisions. Your corporal radios in and tells you that you have an enemy convoy inbound on your position. Where do you stand? Do you crouch behind a wall? Hide down an alley? Do you scramble around in search of a ladder to get to a rooftop? A high position is always good. But you've not got long - the convoy will get there soon and if you're not ready for them, they'll put more holes in you than a cheese grater.
The single-player campaign is one tough cookie - you're looking at a good 15 hours of skilful stealth and sharp-shooting to get through. And you'll be happy to know there's a big old multiplayer mode in there too, which includes all the stealth tactics of single-player. To start with, you can play through the entire solo campaign co-operatively with a friend via split-screen, System Link or online over Xbox Live. It works really well because, of course, the second player takes control of what would otherwise be the AI-controlled soldier, and you can work your way through the open environments via separate routes, flanking enemies everywhere.
Over on the battle side of things, you've got 12 arenas - mostly in city streets but a park and a couple of warehouses add variety to the selection. Split-screen gives you two modes: Sharpshooter, your standard deathmatch, and Last Man Standing, which gives everyone a single life per round. That's not all either - Advanced Warfighter also packs an impressive ten multiplayer modes in System Link and Xbox Live modes. Assassination mode sounds particularly cool, having one team trying to kill a VIP within a time limit while the other team do their best to keep him alive.
We really enjoyed playing the new Ghost Recon game, even if the whole 'Advanced Warfighter' thing turns out not to be that advanced after all - the radar isn't really any different from other shooters in the past, and the little video visor is of hardly any use. But when it comes down to it, GRAW is brimming with atmosphere, has brilliant, open levels and challenging AI that will put your shooting skills to the test. Combine the 15 or so hours of single-player action with the heaps of fun to be had in multiplayer, and only one other shooter is hefty enough to contend with it. So give your Halo 2 disc a break for a few hours and check this out. Go on, you can do it.
TOM CLANCY'S RAINBOW SIX 3
The ultimate package for fans of realism-based FPSs
First-person shooter - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 9.4/10 - Xbox Live features *****
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TomR63.txtRead Review
Unless you've been living in a fallout shelter for the last year, you couldn't have escaped the phenomenal success of Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six 3 (Issue 23, 9.4) when it flashed and cleared its way onto Xbox last November. Even if you didn't get to sample the devilish delights of controlling the world's premier counter-terrorist squad, chances are the TV/Tube/billboard campaign percolated into your subconscious. But Ding and co didn't cruise to notoriety on the crest of a marketing rainbow, because their first Xbox outing was a storming squad-based FPS. Aside from looking the bomb, it incorporated an involving single-player campaign and a fantastic multiplayer that remains one of the most popular Xbox Live games to date.
If you're a Rainbow virgin (shame on you!), a comprehensive tutorial will quickly bring raw recruits up to speed on movement and weapon techniques. For the veterans out there, a more accessible front-end menu makes jumping into the game a cinch and, once you do, it's all comfortingly familiar.
The single-player campaign takes the pleasingly simple route of the first title, with players reprising the role of hard-as-nails Rainbow commander Ding Chavez. A loose plot involving shady terrorists, nuclear plutonium and a kidnapped scientist (can't these guys ever look after themselves?) ties together ten varied maps and objectives (mostly involving eliminating terrorists, defusing bombs, eliminating more terrorists, rescuing hostages and shooting some more terrorists). But although these missions sound a bit similar, intelligent level design always keeps the action fun and fresh. Making much more use of the vertical plane, players need to be constantly on the lookout for rooftop snipers and Molotovs raining down from mezzanines above. You're given much more freedom to explore levels as well, with the addition of lots more ladders and stairways to gain the upper hand.
To complement this, the enemy AI has been significantly upped, eliminating any trial and error gameplay complaints of the original. Repeatedly try to work through a particular area and, far from remaining rooted to the same spot time after time, foes will move from cover to cover, take hostages and set up ambushes, all in the name of countering the Rainbow boys' efforts and keeping gamers on their toes. Try playing on Veteran or Elite difficulty settings and assaults must be planned even more carefully. Utilising the rest of your team is just as crucial, and the slicker, intuitive method of issuing a host of varied orders (along with the returning, fantastic voice-activated commands) means you'll be Opening, Flashing and Clearing before you can say, well, Zulu. That said, certain missions require Ding to make the final objective alone, inciting some exciting, solo Rambo-esque running and gunning.
But enough of the single-player mode; there's no 'I' in team so hook up with a bunch of mates and settle into the true essence of Black Arrow - the absolutely fantastic multiplayer options. For counter-terrorist twosomes, a split-screen co-op mode makes its debut and offers a surprisingly tactical experience. Choosing between Practice Missions (complete with different objectives) and Terrorist Hunt (eliminate all enemies throughout the single-player maps), each player lacks the option to control the rest of the team, but must still put valuable covering and sniping techniques to use in order to achieve success.
It's the new System Link and Xbox Live options that have made us really see the light however, because everything lacking from the original has been redressed. Co-op missions and Terrorist Hunt are still present, as is the frantic 16-way Sharpshooter much loved by the online fraternity.
However, the inclusion of a couple of additional game modes means this Arrow really hits the spot. We're sure everyone knows the ins and outs of Capture the Flag, but the intensified strategic element of Black Arrow elevates this beyond the norm of a mad dash. The great level design means each potential push for the flag must be a carefully voice co-ordinated operation and, believe us, this is as tense as shooters go. Capture the Point is basically King of the Hill, but yet again careful planning is the only way to ensure your team is the only one left standing on the hallowed ground.
And so, the burning question. What else does Rainbow Six 3: Black Arrow bring to the table over the original? Well, to be perfectly honest, not a great deal more. The graphics have been given a slight graphical polish, though don't look radically different. Gameplay is pretty much exactly the same, but then if the formula of mixing top-notch strategy and frantic FPS ain't broke, why try and fix it? As a standalone mission disc (meaning you don't require the original game to play it) at £20 this is superb value for money. And because it features such a wealth of multiplayer options and Live playability, you would need to have been shell-shocked by several Flashbangs to not want this in your life. Open wallet, Move to shop and Buy on Zulu. Outstanding, Ding.
TOM CLANCY'S SPLINTER CELL
Gritty, good-looking, exciting and amazingly atmospheric
Action adventure - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 9.0/10
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TomSC.txtRead Review
Don't know about you, but stealth doesn't really figure in our everyday lives at Official Xbox Magazine. Unless, of course, we're late for work (sorry boss), in which case we make the journey from the front door to our desks as unobtrusively as a sponge ninja. Who is invisible. In the main, though, we're not ones to keep quiet for long.
Not everyone can afford to be so astoundingly brash and brazen, mind. Sam Fisher, star of Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell, is one of these people. If he was to prance about like us, loudly impersonating Papa Lazarou from The League of Gentlemen, he'd be shot to bits in seconds.
We're sorry to say that you can't actually do Papa Lazarou impressions in Splinter Cell. What you can do, though, is pretty much everything that a stealthy, gadget-laden blokey like Sam would do in real life (we'd imagine).
Abseil down a building and through a window? Check. Flick off the lights, flick on the night vision, and bash some heads? Go on then.
Play through the game without being constantly interrupted by cut-scenes that last longer than most marriages? Blimey, you can do that too, along with loads of other cool new stuff.
What you can expect from a single-player stealth adventure has changed.
Yes, while the success of Metal Gear Solid and its sequel indicate that gamers like sneaking about, for every Solid Snake fan there's someone who can't be bothered with FMV clip after FMV clip. Those latter folks can now rest easy, because the stealth game they've always wanted to play is here. Sam Fisher has knocked Snake off his pedestal.
Splinter Cell is superb. The feeling of being on a covert mission and doing virtually anything possible to remain undetected has rarely been achieved to the extent it has here. The subtlety of the analogue control means that your actions become as careful and considered as they would be in real life. Staying in the dark and checking out your surroundings with thermal and night vision soon becomes second nature, as does slipping fibre-optic cable under doors and knocking out the lights.
Silently taking out enemies by grabbing them from behind and bashing their heads is a skill that you'll soon become frighteningly adept at. Fans of stealth will love the tense process of tracking a foe and choosing the right moment to attack him.
Happily, that's not all there is to the game. While stealth is always high on Fisher's list of priorities, there's significant variety in the gameplay, helping to keep the basic sneaky premise fresh throughout. On some missions, killing anyone results in failure, putting far more emphasis on remaining totally undetected. New equipment is also added to Sam's arsenal throughout; it's some time before his versatile rifle becomes available, for example.
Other neat variations on the traditional adventure missions include a kidnapping and a rush to defuse a bomb, forcing you to adapt your skills at a moment's notice. Tasks like these prevent the action from ever becoming stale.
The plot encourages progression, too.
Cut-scenes progress the basic plot between missions, with Sam's personal situation being neatly blended with news broadcasts relaying the 'bigger picture' to the world at large.
Relatively unusually for a video game plot (although not previous Tom Clancy games on PC), Splinter Cell's story is genuinely intriguing and mature, not to mention credible.
Perhaps the greatest indication of the story's success is that cut-scenes are welcome when they arise, rather than being something you just want to skip through to get back to the action.
The story is also intertwined in the gameplay. Sam can check computers he comes across and read data sticks dropped by enemies on his nifty Palm computer.
Taking the form of email exchanges between terrorists and often informing you of door codes, these little bites of information add a layer of depth and purpose to the action.
If you've ever played the ground-breaking Deus Ex, you'll understand how little things like this add to the overall atmosphere.
Splinter Cell's jaw-dropping visuals help in this department, too. This is easily among the most impressive looking games we've seen on Xbox and, therefore, ever.
The thermal and night vision filters are as amazing-looking as they are useful: the night vision goggles, in particular, make Sam's world look almost photo-realistic at times. Equally stunning is the lighting. Shadows are cast in an amazingly realistic fashion and are exploited to the full by the game's designers.
As well as looking simply gorgeous, the shadowing is something you'll need to exploit well to remain undetected. If GoldenEye made you constantly check for CCTV cameras whenever you went out, then Splinter Cell will give you an aversion to bright light matched only by vampire moles.
The locations illuminated by the exemplary lighting effects are hugely impressive. Every room looks exactly how you'd expect it to; offices feel like places of work and you can almost smell the Toilet Duck in the lavatories you come across. All this graphical realism adds enormous amounts of atmosphere and grittiness to the action, and the wide variety of locations means there's a hell of a lot of opportunity for showing off. And there's nothing wrong with that.
A trio of niggles stop Splinter Cell from being perfect. Each mission is interspersed with checkpoints, meaning that progression is steady for the most part. But you'll find you get stuck at some points for quite some time; if you get to a new checkpoint with little health and even less ammo, getting to the next one can be a nightmare. It doesn't happen all that often, but when it does, frustration can set in because trial and error is required to work out how to progress beyond these tricky bits.
Some patchy enemy AI contributes to this element of try and retry. It varies quite a bit, so that some guards are convincingly alert and others are simpletons that let you get away with murder (literally). It means that you're never quite sure how they'll react, although that does help make things suitably tense.
The game is rather linear, too. Perhaps because the levels look so realistic, it's easy to assume you are in a building and can go where you want. The truth is that your route through them is largely predetermined, as in a Tomb Raider game. Your freedom tends to be restricted to stealthy strategies rather than how to negotiate levels - we'd have liked a little more leeway to explore more open environments, especially given Sam's impressive repertoire of acrobatics.
That said, the linearity does have its benefits. It means that the game is perfectly paced and exciting, with a minimum of slack moments.
Thankfully, the niggles don't spoil things, mainly because Splinter Cell is such an overwhelmingly enthralling game to play. The combination of cracking scenarios, cutting-edge visuals and tense atmosphere is spot-on. It's one of those games where you tell yourself you'll play to just one more checkpoint before turning it off, and then you look at your watch and three or four hours have passed by.
What's more, it'll stand up to a lot of lengthy gaming sessions, because there are plenty of long missions in the game, with the promise of more to come, thanks to downloadable content via Xbox Live.
This slick, engrossing stealth adventure uses the power of Xbox to its full capacity, and has some of the most exciting moments we've experienced in a game of this sort. This game should be part of your collection.
TOM CLANCY'S SPLINTER CELL CHAOS THEORY
Elegant, engaging and electrifying, Fisher mercilessly silences any competition. The best Splinter Cell yet
Screenshots - Action adventure - Issue 41 (April 2005) - 9.4/10
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SCchaos.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




Sshhh.You hear that? A rustle of cellophane. The sinister snapping of Amaray plastic. Then bam! We're out cold. That's what would happen, we imagine, if games somehow developed artificial intelligence, appendages and, erm, the ability to jump off the shelf and assault us. Well, Chaos Theory would at least. But put down the crack pipe, it's more than just belief in the surreal you'll need to suspend whilst playing Tom Clancy's latest stealth 'em up. Without doubt, this is one of the best-looking games we've ever seen on Xbox. Chaos Theory is the true successor to the groundbreaking Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell (Issue 09, 9.0), developed by the same studio that created the original. Pandora Tomorrow (Issue 27, 9.3) was a brilliant stop-gap, but a swift sticky shocker and sleeper hold later, and CT jumps in to relieve command and establish itself as the true sultan of stealth.
If there's one assumption CT does make, it's that the vast majority of its audience will have played, at some stage previously, one of its little brothers. The obligatory pretty cutscene opener details the latest international crisis tempting Sam Fisher out of retirement. Your cast of supporting team members, including no-nonsense tutor Lambert, simply informs Sam in the excellent standard of voice acting we've come to expect, which exotic location and sinister enigma he's being shipped off to visit next. Comprehensive Training videos immediately reiterate the Fishter's espionage ability for the rusty, and detail his incredible new array of skills and kills for everyone else.
Refreshingly, this cut-the-crap approach does allow players to tweak and tailor their equipment before each mission. Go underground like The Jam with sticky cameras and shockers in the Stealth option. And when the situation looks like it could all go Die Hard on you, pack extra ammunition and grenades with the trigger-happy Assault option. Catering for both ends of the patience spectrum, this is a great touch that adds healthy substance to the mix. Indeed, Splinter Cell Chaos Theory tries to pack in more diversity than a shelf full of Kellogg's variety packs, boasting multiple paths through levels. Granted, you'll ultimately reach the same funnel points, but CT's levels feature a myriad of routes through, each posing different puzzles and setpieces to conquer. It makes the original look more railed than London Underground.
Like a Chateauneuf, Sam Fisher has definitely got finer with age. We're not making any slanderous accusations of Botox or Just For Men to hide the ravages of time, but the visuals in CT are truly enlightening. Gorgeously lit levels create some amazingly atmospheric - and realistic - shadows to lurk in. The cod liver oil's been doing the trick too, as Sam's slinky, cat-like movements are animated in a stunningly believable way. For a party with a happy atmosphere, CT delivers like a sticky shocker to the nether regions. Aside from utterly astounding visuals and lighting, the brilliant score perfectly accentuates the immersive atmosphere; subtle and almost unnoticeable during more clandestine moments, rousing to heart-pounding intensity during firefights. Turn up the 5.1 and you'll be jumping out of your pants (what better lone attire is there to play games in?) as bullets crack and ping around you, shattering glass and plaster with frightening realism.
To complement his visual makeover, Sam packs some killer moves too. If Pandora Tomorrow provided the whistles (Black button), Chaos Theory sees Sam boast killing ability with bells on. Entice a guard to your secluded spot and tap the R trigger to execute a no-nonsense, silent kill even Tom Berenger's Sniper (One Shot, One Kill, One Crap Film) would be proud of. There's no gratuitous gore, just a slick, satisfying feeling of getting the job done. It doesn't pay to be quite so knife-happy all the time however, as CT continues to press home the fact that stealth gives wealth. Of information, that is. Grab a guard, interrogate him, and often he'll cough up (before the blood) some very handy info pertaining to the mission, be it door codes or hints on how to navigate tripwires and traps. You'll occasionally get the same information by eavesdropping on a conversation (instead of blithely barging in, frag grenade in hand), yet this doesn't compare to the titillation of hostage taking.
Enemy AI yet again pushes the boundaries beyond what we've previously experienced. Guards often patrol in groups, and lone gunmen aren't afraid to immediately call in their mates if they spot anything untoward. Instead of merely investigating the problem and then promptly disappearing (Stolen, put this dunce's hat on and go sit in the corner), they'll remain in the area till you either discreetly dispatch their number, or evade the now doubly complex patrol patterns. The point of 'Stealth First' is hammered home even more succinctly here. In the previous games, guards would elevate their alert status by progressively donning body armour and helmets. Here, the paranoid perps will suit up quicker than a chauffeur caught with his boss's wife, ultimately fortifying their defensive positions once the alarm stages reach level four. Face shots only here folks, and frickin' hard ones at that. However, this is finely balanced with the welcome addition of a Noise meter, where the varying level of detectable noise you're permitted to make is displayed.
Failing that, your cool thermal vision soon points an accusing finger at heat-emitting Mercs and the like, giving Sam the ability to snipe from a safe distance through their thinly veiled cover. Solid cover isn't a lot safer either, as superb physics see bullets penetrating, pinging off objects and cannoning into enemies. Once again, great AI sees them take up intelligent firing positions, though short, controlled bursts will keep their heads down long enough for you to figure out just what the hell you should do.
In a pleasing bid to make the game more accessible, players can carry on even after they've triggered alarm after alarm, as long as the primary objectives are met. Another huge improvement is the new instant save feature, sure to see a significant drop in heart conditions; no more scraping to the next checkpoint, ammo dry, and with only spit balls and foul language to get by.
The new streamlined interface is less clunky than previous games, and makes selecting weapons and attachments for your SK-20 easier than ever. Gone is the so-last-year PDA system, replaced by a one-touch button menu, but this now means you have access to a brilliantly useful, fully interactive 3D map. Your objectives are clearly displayed, so there's no confusing (read: bloody irritating) backtracking through levels if you've lost your way. Emails are the new data sticks, and when coupled with the odd loud-mouthed guard, provide a perfectly paced drip feed of information with which to complete the mission.
Dispelling the myth that all gruff-voiced, reluctant action heroes like to work alone, CT now offers the superb option of two-player co-op. If Pandora Tomorrow opened the closet doors for dressing in black rubber and lurking in the shadows with fellow espionage enthusiasts, then CT will quite literally blow them off. It's the addition of this fantastic Co-op mode, coupled with seriously innovative features that genuinely enhances the gameplay experience, that makes CT more than just another sequel.
Sod frantic shooters, the subtle craftiness of Chaos Theory has reignited our passion for the precise, methodical approach, something that's been frustratingly absent from a title since, well, Pandora Tomorrow. Awesomely exciting and heart-stoppingly tense in turn, Fisher and co prove the law of diminishing returns completely wrong, and deliver the most complete and cool stealth 'em up we've ever seen. You're never too old for hide and seek when it's as good as this.
TONY HAWK'S AMERICAN WASTELAND
The Hawk-man finally hits Xbox Live - and it's the best one in years
Action - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 8.8/10
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TonyHawkAW.txtRead Review
It's a bit like learning how to walk again after a tragic skateboarding accident. Every year we have to remind ourselves which button is for grind, relearn exactly how many spins we can get in before smashing into the side of a building, and generally work on the old reflexes so that they can cope with more Tony Hawk. It is, after all, one of the videogame world's finest and fastest inventions.
And once you've got yourself up to speed, this year's offering - which is Tony Hawk number SEVEN if you've been keeping count since 1999 - is right up there with the best that the skateboarding series has managed to produce. You can count the number of new moves on the fingers of a hand that's been caught up in nasty industrial accident, but this year's Hawk sees a streamlining and change in emphasis since last year's THUG sequel. American Wasteland has got rid of all the MTV Jackass stylings, replacing them with a simple Story mode, featuring five generic skater dudes and a fit goth chick called Mindy.
In the game's Story mode you travel to Los Angeles, hook up with skanky aspiring cartoon illustrator Mindy, and set about trashing the city and stealing bits of scenery so you can build the 'ultimate' new skate park in the Hollywood Hills.
The biggest change to this latest Tony Hawk is the way it's joined together. The first area has a busted subway in it, which you eventually open once you've pulled off a few tricks and impressed the right people. This then leads you to the next 'level', which is accessed by skating down the subway. This unlocking system gradually gives you access to all of Tony Hawk's Los Angeles at once, letting you skate from the last level to the first in one long, seamless journey.
This is a great change. There are buses and cars dumped throughout the game that serve as teleport jumps if you want to get from the skate park to Beverly Hills in a few seconds, so there's no need to worry about there being lots of travelling between the different levels. You're in a nice, complete little world, and you're ever so gently forced to learn it really, really well. Which means you get more out of it in the end, rather than scraping the bare minimum to unlock the next one and moving on, as you did in the Hawks of old. Each area's a little different as you'd expect, but there are no jarring leaps from, say, Alcatraz to a cruise ship and then back to a city carnival, like we've seen in the past. It's loads better this way.
Entirely separate from all this are two very different and welcome sections - Classic mode and Xbox Live play. The Classic bit is the good old progressive, level-based Tony Hawk's, featuring familiar levels from previous games polished up and jigged around. Here you skate around Minneapolis and Chicago from the first Tony Hawk's game, doing the usual tasks - collecting SKATE, earning Stat points to make you better and finding hidden video tapes. All very nice, but it's a shame there are no new levels to enjoy.
Custom mode does have one quite superb ace up its torn and dirty old sleeve, though - split-screen play. Now two players can simultaneously battle to achieve the goals, which, when combined with Xbox Live play, makes this by far the most sociable Tony Hawk game yet. And as you'd expect from a series in its seventh year, the behind-the-scenes customisation options are immense. You can edit tricks, morph skaters and create your own custom skate parks, with vast potential for building your own amazing skate zones and a huge variety of ways to make American Wasteland your own personalised skate heaven.
But a lot of the old cheats and minor flaws exploited by experienced players have not been ironed out. In Classic mode, simple Natas spins and easy button-mashing, lip-trick and rail combos let you beat any high score challenge on your first attempt, while the Story section tends to start off with simple tasks before suddenly giving you impossibly complex missions that'll have you frustrated for hours on end.
But then all the last six Tony Hawk games suffered from this, and they did all right for themselves. What you're getting here is a classy set of new levels, Xbox Live play for eight people and a few old classic levels remade for old time's sake just because they can. It's a bit like a director's cut of Tony Hawk's that gets rid of all the rubbish and tightens up the winning formula. It may simply be going through the motions, but they're bloody good motions.
TONY HAWK'S PRO SKATER 3
The biggest and best skateboarding title in the world
Extreme sports - Issue 2 (April 2002) - 8.8/10
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Tony3.txtRead Review
There's a good reason why the Tony Hawk's franchise has done so well on every system it has graced. When it comes to extreme sport video games, Tony is the man.
More people have scraped his face across the tarmac than any other plank-riding madman, and now we get to do it on Xbox.
Everything you've heard about this game series is true - Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 is one of the most immensely playable games around, thanks to brilliant level design and a smart, intricate trick system.
Every one of the 10 main levels has been constructed in such a way that you can perform ludicrous combos and chain together astronomical point scores.
Almost every piece of scenery, whether in the ramp-happy stunt parks or the more unlikely airport lounge level, slots together to make a skater's paradise.
Any curved surface can be used as a launch pad to grab some excellent air. Any edge can be used to pull off a grind, and the manual and revert techniques allow you to thread your tricks together.
Once you've eased yourself into the slick, simple control system and acclimatised to the warp-factor speed of play, each stage becomes a freestyle playground where time is spent mixing together ultra-combos for pure satisfaction.
The airport level, for example, is filled with a series of rails that span the entire stage, beginning at start of the customs corridor and looping all around the departure lounge.
That is, of course, after you've wrung every last challenge, stat point and hidden deck out of the career mode. And then, if you're still gagging, you can build your own little skate Lilliput with the park and character editors.
The option to create your own soundtrack using the Xbox tune-ripping facility is a real plus, because the licensed soundtrack for the game is the weakest (Motrhead excused) so far in the Tony Hawk's series.
As is the case with Amped (Issue 01, 8.7) and Project Gotham Racing (Issue 01, 8.9), throwing your own favourite tunes from your prized CD collection into the mix makes the game a far more personal experience. After all, what developer could possibly cater for your own music tastes?
The only significantly annoying aspect of the gameplay is the presence of a few glitches. There are a few invisible trip wires - times when your character will suddenly decide to dismount at an awkward angle or collapse arse-over-tit for no reason whatsoever.
Although they are relatively rare (so far, we've found fewer of them here than in the PlayStation 2 version), they're still there and are an unfair fork-in-the-eye, especially during the later levels when the stakes are raised and your trick-scores are as big as lottery jackpots.
To a lesser extent, it's worth mentioning that the tasks have little consequence - they do little to modify the level, and occasionally open up new sections, but that's it.
Everything about THPS3 is pure entertainment - from your first cigar-worthy 100,000-point combo spectacular, to the carrot-snap crunch and smear of blood that follows a tumble.
It's also one of the very few video games around where you can see and feel your skills improving with practice. During your first few shaky goes you'll awkwardly frown at the telly and controller as you struggle to keep your buttocks off the bitumen; the later career goals seem stupidly unattainable. A week later, you're holding your own, your stuntman slapping the combos together like a tasty stir-fry.
After earning your wings by completing every single challenge and besting every competition, you'll go back and do it with another character, exploring the now-familiar parks with a whole new trick-set. Then you'll try and conquer every level goal in a single two minute session. It's possible...
Tony Hawk's 3 takes days to master, but months to truly savour. Whether you're a fat-panted skate loon stereotype or not, that's something well worth playing for.
TONY HAWK'S PRO SKATER 4
Silky trick system. Absolutely tons to do, and then some
Extreme sports - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 8.6/10
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Tony4.txtRead Review
Just about every town in England has a public square or meeting place where you'll see groups of skateboarders gathering to show off their skills. But often, you won't see any actual skateboarding at all; instead, they'll all just take turns to stamp on the ends of their boards before falling off.
But don't mock them. They keep falling off because skateboarding is ankle-twistingly, ligament-wrenchingly tricky, with proper tricks reserved for a super-elite group. Yet these near-mythical heroes, capable of (gasp!) actual skateboarding, are still completely rubbish when placed alongside Tony Hawk. He's a brilliant skateboarder, and he features in brilliant skateboarding games.
Improving Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3 (Issue 02, 8.8) was always going to be a tall order - that game represents the pinnacle of the extreme sports genre, with a brilliant trick system and tightly designed levels combining to make a truly enjoyable, great game.
It's therefore a brave move by the game's developers to introduce such sweeping changes for the fourth instalment. These changes are mainly structural - gone are the two-minute runs on smaller levels, replaced by sprawling areas of the kind found in Aggressive Inline (Issue 07, 7.7). The time limit has also been dropped, so you can now skate about for as long as you like.
The objectives are still here, though. By approaching a person with a convenient large arrow above their head, you can try a variety of tasks similar to those found in previous Tony games (perform a specific trick, beat a score, collect S-K-A-T-E - you know the sort).
Happily, there's a whole bunch of new objectives, too. Some involve being dragged along by a car or other vehicle and keeping your balance using the standard manual balance meter for an allotted time, while others demand that you race from point to point within a tight time limit. There are also new C-O-M-B-O challenges, plus challenges that demand that you master the new Spine Transfer move.
Despite all the changes, though, for our money THPS4 doesn't quite match up to its predecessor for a number of reasons. One of these concerns the objectives themselves, which vary in quality. Some are top-notch, either with an excellent mini-game feel or just a solid, fair test of your skills. But others can be irritating - the task that asks the player to collect a series of 12 pink elephants is very fiddly for a challenge on the first level, for example, as is the objective where you must use the Spine Transfer between moving carnival floats.
There are a few tasks like these that require you to do the same thing over and over until you nail it - and, because they're rather fiddly, it can be more frustrating than fun. That said, the open structure of the game does mean you can saunter off to try something else for while.
If you're new to the series, you might find THPS4's learning curve frustratingly steep. The game seems to assume a familiarity with the basic controls and throws you straight into tasks that require a fair knowledge of stringing combos together. This may seem a bit presumptuous if you've never played a Pro Skater game before, so be warned. For those of us who have spent hours perfecting our trickery in the past, however, it means we can get stuck straight in without having to perform insultingly simple challenges from the off. There's certainly lots of challenge for seasoned players.
The only other complaint is that the game's new structure has resulted in much larger levels. Admittedly, this is a matter of preference, but the smaller areas found in THPS3 were, we think, better. They seemed tightly designed and rewarding to play, and cramming everything into a smaller space meant that you could know every layout like the back of your skateboard.
That's still theoretically the case with this version, but the larger levels feel a little flabbier. Some parts still demonstrate an admirable level of complexity - the more intricate areas of Alcatraz, for instance - but there are quite a lot of duller areas with nothing more than a few funboxes and kerbs dotted about, too. It's closer to the kind of area you might skate in real life, basically, and how you feel about that will probably dictate how you feel about the new sprawling areas. We prefer the all-out 'game-ness' of the levels in THPS3, though, so ner.
But regardless of the debate over the new game structure, Pro Skater 4 cements the series' reputation as the finest extreme sports game available. The trick system is the best out there, by miles, and stringing together an almost offensive number of tricks is joyful. And, once mastered, the Spine Transfer allows you to negotiate the scenery even more effectively.
The third in the series is still our favourite, but it's a very close-run thing - and regardless, there are hours and hours of high-quality skating to be had here. So, our Tone's pulled it off again - but he's really got his work cut out for the next one.
TONY HAWK'S UNDERGROUND
Refreshingly different and diverse. Hop off and explore!
Extreme sports - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.6/10
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THUG.txtRead Review
Urban skaters - despite the efforts of the authorities to move them on from the town centre every Saturday afternoon, and Daily Mail readers' anguish when they show up on interestingly shaped street corners, they're persistent little buggers and somehow fade away and reappear as soon as a disgruntled back is turned on their experimental antics.
Tony Hawk is a leading evangelist in this concrete church. Not only is he one of the most well known and respected extreme sportsmen of all time, but the phenomenal success of his previous four signature video games has introduced an army of armchair athletes to the four-wheeled wonder of skating.
Tony Hawk's Underground, aka THUG, sees a return of the birdman, but is a huge extension of the previous titles. Skate culture eschews mainstream society for restricting creative freedom, and THUG has capitalised on this by allowing the player freedom to hop off of their board at any time (be it midway through a combo or atop a huge electrical pylon). You can now run around, climb onto roofs, and reach what appear to be completely inaccessible areas. This massively expands the playable environments, and genuinely adds a breath of fresh air to the stagnating series.
There are loads of returning pros to play with - all of Tone's mates, in the game as a favour, and surely not just for the huge licensing fees they get paid. However, this time round the Create-A-Skater lets you customise your on-screen persona's sex, body shape, facial details and garb. There are tons of different clothing options available for each part of your skater, and you can choose the exact hue, shade and tint of each garment.
Anyway, we digress from the game itself. You can play as a pro, as before, through free skate levels, and post high scores to unlock bits of video and increase your stats. The real meat of things, however, is in the story mode. Use said created skater, and lead your frowzy friend out of the streets of New Jersey. You've got no money, drug barons are after your mates, and all you want to do is skate. Salvation can be found, though, through running errands for local gangsters in return for favours, and hope flourishes when Chad Muska pays the area a visit. Impress him, and he'll give you your first pro set-up. And so begins an epic journey, whereby impressing cameo pro riders, in various international cities and competitions, will earn you success and pave the way for global superstardom.
The better you get, the more your stats will increase, and the more tricks you'll learn. All the favourite moves are present, and gradually unlock more equipment and decks, eventually culminating in that elusive pro model.
The create-a-park option makes a welcome return too, along with the addition of create-a-trick. Decide what, how and where you grab, bone and spin in the air, in an elaborate and incredibly hard-looking, but stupidly easy executable that'll have your mates going "Whoa, bra!" Or something.
Multiplayer options again make an appearance, and the inclusion of System Link means all the popular cool kids can play together, although criminally there's no Xbox Live play.
As always, the graphics and animation have been given the odd tweak, and the game world is denser than ever. The story mode and free roaming feature genuinely add a bit of flavour to a tried and tested formula, though the car driving sections are a bit lame and frankly unnecessary. Like its real-life counterpart, THUG continues to push the boundaries of what's possible in extreme sports. A real winner.
TONY HAWK'S UNDERGROUND 2
Not much progression in gameplay, but still an excellent, totally enjoyable sports outing that is two games in one
Extreme sports - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 8.5/10
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THUG2.txtRead Review
This 'Don't try it at home' thing is all getting a bit out of hand. Rocket-airing off the church roof may require some form of precautionary warning, sure, but wheelchairing up an air vent while wearing a leg cast, spinning a 720 chair-flip and acid-dropping onto a Berlin art gallery from a height of 40 feet? Come on, only a fully trained kamikaze airhead would be ready to commit himself to that one. But then, that is exactly what this game is all about.
If anything, the new Tony Hawk's game has taken things to the next level of extremity. Rather than restricting control to your custom-created skate punk, the main Story mode lets you alternate between recognisable pros (Rodney Mullen, Chad Muska et al) and mystery guest stars. These range from go-kart riding Aussie natives to Jackass mentalists on mechanised bulls. It all makes for a game that is marginally more fun and out-there than previous entries.
The quest begins with Tony Hawk and loud-mouthed Bam Margera leading two teams of upcoming pros (some fictional, some real, some from Jackass) on a World Destruction Tour, with the losers forking out for the entire competition. Gulp! You'll start off in Boston, before flying off to sample the delights of Barcelona, Sydney, Berlin and more. This makes for the familiar gameplay of skating around the city, nailing fixed goals (grinding specific routes, setting cops' heads on fire etc), picking up extra challenges and unlocking goodies.
The twist comes in the additional ability to control both your pro team-mates and a bevy of new characters, with less obvious extreme sports vehicles offering alternative handling but similar stunt capabilities. The best - the wheelchair-bound maniac Paulie (whose voice is very suspiciously Cartman-like) - zips along at such an unbelievably fast rate, you'll be bouncing, spinning and grinding across rooftops like a pigeon with its backside on fire. It certainly ramps up the series' humour, whilst also milking its Jackass connection for all its worth.
But the new Tony Hawk's Underground (THUG) experience doesn't end there - Neversoft has generously complemented the new levels with a Classic mode. This revisits the time-limited gameplay of the Pro Skater games, giving you two minutes to complete a number of much-adulated tasks like collecting S-K-A-T-E, smashing sick scores and finding the hidden video tape. Crack the early levels and you'll unlock environments from Pro Skater games 1-3 too, such as the legendary warehouse. With the addition of all your new tricks (like jumping off your board) and the improved grinding skills, beating Classic mode is considerably easier than it used to be. Still, you're essentially getting two games for the price of one.
So something for everyone, then. However, in spite of the gratifying additions, you can't help but feel THUG2, even in Story mode, still plays very much like its predecessors. The controls are virtually identical (if it ain't broke, don't fix it), the skaters perform mightily similar manoeuvres (even aboard a lawnmower) and, stylistically, it's an unnoticeably touched-up affair. In fact, for all its free-roaming environments and Jackass-style humour, at the core remains an experience as close to Pro Skater 2 and 3 as you can possibly get without risk of passing infection. Which is, to be fair, great. Unless you're bored rigid of the greatest extreme sports series known to man, of course.
There are some minor downsides too. The city settings could certainly be larger and more varied. Some feel noticeably restricted in size, while others appear as lacklustre extensions of the previous ones, sporting similar buildings, landmarks and vehicles to trick off. A day and night rotational cycle simply annoys because the lighting is predominately basic (compare it to the forthcoming Midnight Club 3, which is stunning), and the split-screen multiplayer (there's no Live support) is horribly claustrophobic on anything other than a huge TV set. Fortunately, the rest of the game is typical Tony brilliance.
With the reintroduction of the old-skool game, this is certainly the most complete Tony Hawk's offering yet. It may be more cartoon-like than its predecessors, but provided you haven't grown tired of all those boomerangs, kick-flips and boardslides, it is certainly the one to get.
TOP SPIN
Incredible detail. Hands down this is the best tennis game in the world
Sports - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 9.0/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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TopSpin.txtRead Review
Wimbledon fever might have passed us by but we've finally got a tennis game to keep us gagging for strawberries and cream all year round. But we've not just got 'another tennis game', oh no, Xbox is now host to the richest, deepest, most accessible tennis experience ever, and yes, that does include Sega's once mighty Virtua Tennis. In fact, we would go as far as to say it's even better than the real thing. And that's coming from a genuine fan of the sport.
Since the launch of Xbox we've had to endure some simply shocking attempts. FILA World Tennis (Issue 09, 2.6), Tennis Masters Series 2003 (Issue 10, 3.0) and Pro Tennis WTA Tour (Issue 07, 1.9) weren't worth the grass they're played on. Why quality tennis games are so few and far between is beyond us, but we're thankful to PAM for giving Xbox a tennis game to not shout 'fault' at.
Every button on the controller is vital in making your Grand Slam dream reality, but if you've never played a tennis game before, you'll be acing opponents in no time thanks to the A button. This is basically your safe shot. It won't go like a rocket but you're assured a shot that will get over the net. A good starting point.
Once you've got this licked, you can bring in the other buttons to spice up your rallies. The B button is your top spin shot. Timing this perfectly produces a fast low return of the ball and if you get the angle right, it can be turned into a clean winner with a little practice.
On the other side of the court is the spin shot (X). This can be used to return a ball slowly over the net, allowing you to get back into position ready to receive. Once you've improved your character's stat points, you'll be able to slice and curl the ball left and right, which really annoys a human opponent.
The Y button is the classic get-out-of-trouble shot, otherwise known as the lob. If your opponent's dominating the net, just hit this and watch them run backwards swinging at the ball like it's a pesky fly. On the other hand, you can flick the Left trigger to perform a drop shot if you're getting pummelled from the base line.
Pressing and holding down any button causes your player to wind up his shot before letting rip, while a quick tap produces more of a reflex shot. After playing a few games you'll soon be using your favourite shots in your favourite situations.
But there's one extra level that'll truly separate the men from the women and that's the Risk shot. Hitting and holding the Right trigger serves up a small meter with a line across the middle. The idea is that as another horizontal line moves up and down the column, you have to let go of the trigger when the line's in the middle. Release it perfectly and you'll hit a clean winner, miss the bar and you'll miss the court. It's your choice but it's worth it when you get it right.
If you're not hooked up to Xbox Live, don't worry, there's plenty to see and do in the single-player game. It's a bit slow to start, as you begin as a rookie vying for attention at the bottom of the leader board. Win small-time matches for cash to buy equipment or travel the world to enter bigger tournaments. Earn even more cash from completing training tasks and landing big-name sponsors and you're halfway to becoming the next Pete Sampras. It's more like a role-playing game than a tennis game, but you'll come out the other end a champion. Over Xbox Live you will be able to whack your mates' balls in both singles and doubles tournaments. You really couldn't ask for more. Top Spin has the lot.
TORINO 2006
You won't find any crazy physics or special move fireworks in this plain vanilla sports sim
Sports - Issue 52 (February 2006) - 4.9/10
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torino.txt
TOTAL CLUB MANAGER 2004
Impressive, accessible management sim. Play out the matches with FIFA 2004
Sports - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.4/10
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Total2004.txtRead Review
Sitting somewhere between the accessible LMA Manager 2003 (Issue 10, 8.0), and
the statistical overload of Championship Manager 02/03 (Issue 11, 8.1) comes EA's Total Club Manager, with all the fun of running a team from the comfort of your living room.
Pick a team from the 50 leagues on offer, including an astounding 30,000 pro players. Raise that unknown team from the French second division to the dizzy heights of European glory, or just plump for the Premiership side of your choice like everybody else does.
Menus are the staple diet of footy sims, and there's more on display here than in a square mile of Chinatown. But the user-friendly interface makes a daunting task relatively accessible, as the level of detail here is phenomenal, allowing you to fine-tune every aspect of your team.
Set individual training regimes and team talks with all the players and adjust their personal skill levels, as well as the customary tinkering with formation, tactics and transfer market throughout the season. You're rated on a points system, which is affected by your squad's performance, and both the team and fans' morale. The decision to fine a player after a hotel-wrecking rampage, or giving the wrong answer to a reporter all have a significant effect on morale, thus affecting your overall rating. There's a huge amount of freedom on the practical side of things too, from the stadium to the club's marketing.
As befalls many football management sims, the relentless menus and stats can overwhelm the actual excitement of the season. And this is where the most intriguing feature of Total Club Manager 2004 comes into play. Pick a team for your next fixture, and just jump to the end of the 90 minutes for a predetermined evaluation of your performance.
Alternatively, watch a 3D rendered, accelerated version of the match, issuing tactics and commands via the D-pad, in a bid to change the outcome. The most interesting thing, however, is the Football Fusion option. If you own FIFA 2004 (Issue 23, 8.7) you'll love this. Arrange the fixture, then pop in the FIFA disc. All the match details will be there, so just play out the match then swap discs again for the result to be included in TCM, massively expanding the playability of the game. Clever, eh?
The rendered matches do take an age to load, and the graphics (based on a very basic FIFA engine) aren't great, but otherwise TCM is a pretty innovative way to move a rapidly stagnating genre. Liquid Football.
TOTAL CLUB MANAGER 2005
Stands out as an accessible title in a fairly niche market. Compatible with FIFA 2005
Sports - Issue 35 (November 2004) - 8.7/10
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Total2005.txtRead Review
As deep and involving as they are, management games require a lot of patience. To its credit, Total Club Manager does everything to make this as exciting an experience as possible. Banging menu music grabs you by the lapels of your sheepskin and drags you kicking into the game.
Pick a team from the multitude of worldwide squads on offer (yep, take that obscure second-division Portuguese side to European glory and beyond), and immerse yourself in the almost incomprehensible number of squad options, from buying, selling and training players to taking care of the day-to-day running of the club.
After prepping your team to the best of your ability, match days roll around quicker than Lady Chatterly. Skip a game and an instant result is available, calculated on the relative strengths of each game influencing the random nature of a football match. But we'd much rather participate than spectate, and TCM allows players to view a real(ish)-time game, with the ability to significantly affect the outcome. Watch the game comfortingly surrounded by menus of player stats and possible dugout shouts. Simple, intuitive commands like Attack and Defend are complemented by more complex shouts like Pressing and Play Dirty. But utilise the fantastic Football Fusion option and you can take total control. Pop in your FIFA 2005 disc, and you can physically play through the virtual fixture. It may be a bit of a faff swapping between discs, but aficionados won't find a more immersive football experience.
TCM stands out as one of the more accessible titles in a fairly niche market. It might not have the technical weight of its PC counterpart, but it leads the league of management sims on Xbox.
TOTAL IMMERSION RACING
Original ideas and solid visuals, but slow with unspectacular AI
Driving - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 5.7/10
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Total.txtRead Review
As I write this review, Total Immersion Racing is already on sale. Normally when that happens, it's a sign that a publisher suspects less-than-decent reviews and wants to shift a few copies before punters are wise to its iffy status. But that's not entirely the case here.
TIR's special twist is its AI - each driver has some sort of personality, dictating how they'll react to certain situations. Each car also has a meter above it (turn offable with the B button) that shows their current attitude to you - keep cutting them up or crashing into them, and it'll fill up with red mist. The idea is to add a more dramatic, human element to the action that could ultimately see you develop rivals who'll take you out in the last race of the season because you called their Mum a bad name several races ago.
It's a nice idea, but in practice it doesn't really add a vast amount of depth to the action. It is noticeable that some of your fellow racers are more happy than others to push you off the circuit, but it doesn't really feel much more sophisticated than that.
So, the AI isn't as spectacular as we'd hoped it might be, but TIR's main problem is the handling of the cars themselves. It's very difficult to get them around anything but the shallowest of corners without slowing down to a pedestrian pace. They don't hold the road, and keeping them on the track means driving slowly. Which doesn't allow for much excitement. The cars feel floaty too, with no sensation of them having any meaningful contact with the road. Later cars address the speed problem, but you never feel you're in a race with a souped-up car, caning it for all you're worth. The speedo might say 100mph, but it rarely feels like more than 40mph.
There's something likeable about TIR though, despite its failings. It's solid but unspectacular, basically, and once you accept the handling it provides some pleasant enough moments. And there are some nice ideas other than the narky drivers, such as the Challenge mode - which is a series of 30 different driving challenges that unlock new cars and the like as you progress through them.
TIR isn't a revelation, then, but neither is it a total failure. The slow pace and uncomfortable handling detracts from what could have been a good game. As it is, you'll only be waist-deep in the immersion stakes.
TOTAL OVERDOSE
Fajita-flavoured blasting madness! Tony Hawk's meets GTA meets Burnout in this mental arcade shooter
Action - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 7.6/10
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TotalOverdose.txtRead Review
Let's get straight to the point. Shooting people is fun. But before the moral outcry, we mean shooting people in videogames. And before the letters come flooding in about how little Jimmy is being corrupted by the evil of videogames, we're referring strictly to titles with an 18 CERTIFICATE. Total Overdose makes no bones of its content (apart from those of your enemies), and revels in unabashed violence. The comical Mexican flavour sits well with the ultraviolent action, and the affectionate pastiche borrows heavily from every fajita-flavoured film of the last few years.
Killing is more than a necessity in the game - it's an art form. Total Overdose is all about racking up style points. Points mean more than just prizes; each milestone (every 5,000 points or so) unlocks new weapon abilities, health upgrades, and more importantly, more stylish ways of dispatching enemies. Hold the Left trigger and hit any direction on the Left thumbstick, and the old bullet time kicks in while your hombre dramatically dives all over the place. Take an enemy down during this window of opportunity, and you'll amass points - the more outrageous the move, the bigger the bonus. Bounce off cars, flip off walls; there's tons of fun to be had learning and performing a wealth of murderous moves.
Every time you dispatch an enemy, a combo timer starts counting down. You're encouraged to take down another opponent before it resets, at which point it begins again. Chaining kills together is both challenging and fun, and the desperate race against time to find another victim and be as creative with him as possible is a right laugh.
Pull off a particularly spectacular kill, and you'll be rewarded with a Loco move. Mapped to the D-pad, activate one of these and a special ability kicks in - momentarily you'll pull off one-shot kills, gain the powers of a Raging Bull, or summon the help of a fat, very angry wrestler, or the grenade-launcher wielding Sombrero of Death.
Quite... Again, it's all executed really well, and the humour stays strictly tongue-in-cheek. The AI of these CPU team-mates isn't as hot as it could be, but they can still seek out and kill opponents of their own accord well enough. The environments are essentially free-roaming, but the city settings aren't very expansive and can easily be traversed on foot in a couple of minutes. Vehicles are present, but due to the size of the urban environments (and occasionally tricky handling), they aren't crucial to the game.
It's the top mix of crazy humour and frenzied action that elevates Total Overdose above every other generic actioner out there, though. Sure, the action could be seen as mindlessly repetitive, but then to an extent you're only limited by your own creativity. Just kick back and lap up the theatrical gunplay in this sizzling shooter, and you won't get burned.
TOUR DE FRANCE
Great idea, but everything about it is sub-standard
Racing - Issue 6 (August 2002) - 4.6/10
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Tour.txtRead Review
In the absence of any cycling games, Tour De France, a bike-racing title focusing on strategy and conservation of energy rather than leaving skid marks that can be seen from Venus, is a good idea.
In fact, the closest we've come to a title like this is the gladiatrocious Circus Maximus (Issue 05, 3.5), where you had to avoid knackering your horses while still keeping the speed at a premium.
The key to winning races in Tour De France is patience, and effective use of the slipstream provided by packs of competitors around you; a feature that works very well. A slipstream looks like a cheap firework is being held to your face, but it shows in what direction the slipstream is in effect and how you should overtake. It's key to the idea of pacing; riding a slipstream lets you get your puff back, meaning that, when the time is right, you can make a break for the next pack of riders in the distance.
This travelling from group to group is what Tour De France is all about and, while it's a novel idea, it's just a bit uninvolving. Besides looking like a PS2 game on a bad hair day, the bike handles in a twitchy manner.
Rising through the pack is an absolute nightmare due to the unsubtle collisions. The infuriating, untouchable syndrome that often plagues kart games is present here. If you even so much dare as brush against a competitor, they continue unfazed while you're knocked away into a lower position. It even happens if one of them nudges you from behind.
Accelerating is unresponsive, too. You have to hammer the A button to pedal faster, yet it could have been so much better if the analogue controls were employed. As it stands, the triggers are wasted on gear changes and the right thumbstick is unemployed.
If someone were to build on the shaky gameplay of Tour De France and make a better title with push bikes, we'd gladly give it a whirl. As it stands, we'll stick with the motorbikes of MotoGP (Issue 04, 8.9).
TOXIC GRIND
A few imaginative tracks can't disguise the lack of flair or polish
Extreme sports - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 4.8/10
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Toxic.txtRead Review
Nobody likes alarm bells. An alarm bell nearly always heralds the arrival of something bad or unpleasant - anything from waking up on a cold Monday morning to evacuating a burning building. Alarms are bad news, trust us.
The OXM office has a special alarm reserved for suspect games. In the case of Toxic Grind, it first went off when we received word of an extreme sports title that's main claim to fame was that it was the first BMX game to incorporate a storyline. A storyline in an extreme sports game - surely that can't be as important as graphics, handling, playability and excitement? Well, according to THQ and Blue Shift, it can be.
In the future, BMX riding is illegal. It's a crime punishable by having to compete in a series of extreme challenges for a reality TV show called Toxic Grind. Unfortunately, the culling of many BMX riders has resulted in the bad guy, Dixon Von Blass, resorting to time travel to snare fresh meat. And as an American hotshot BMX champ who gets zapped from the present to the future, that's where you come in.
The purpose of this patchy plot is basically to present a BMX game in a different light. But if developers are going to diversify from the core skills of making a competent extreme sports title, then they really need to have mastered the fundamental requirements first.
Ultimately, a BMX game - with or without a story - is still a BMX game. As such, it needs to have responsive handling, playability, an authentic feel and heaps of excitement as its cornerstone, long before getting into the bells and whistles of a plot. The plot in this game basically consists of different settings to do the same standard biking stuff of having to pull off enough tricks to survive the level or out-trick an AI opponent - it doesn't really offer anything new.
Toxic Grind fails because it hasn't really paid enough attention to delivering a worthwhile BMX experience, instead trying to smokescreen the issue with a poor story that may as well not be there. The collision detection is unstable - with wheels occasionally sinking into the track, fortunately not resulting in a crash. There is little sensation of fluid play and you never really achieve the same feeling of zipping along, as you do in the Tony Hawk's Pro Skater series - even though you're in charge of a much faster vehicle than a skateboard.
There are a couple of nice touches, such as a few imaginative power-ups and a couple of visually appealing tracks, but it doesn't disguise the fact that Toxic Grind is just a very average game. If two-wheeled grinding and verting is your thing, check out Dave Mirra Freestyle BMX 2 (Issue 02, 6.9) instead.
TRANSWORLD SNOWBOARDING
A looker, but boredom sets in once the views have been admired
Extreme sports - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 6.1/10
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Transworld1.txtRead Review
Those of you not so keen on the realistic snowboarding offered up by Amped (Issue 01, 8.7), will have been keeping an eye on TransWorld Snowboarding over the last few months.
Not only has every one of its preview versions looked amazing, exploiting the graphical grunt of Xbox to the full, but it has also taken the arcade approach to snowboarding action, with a number of goals to attain on each stage. Beat a certain score, bust a certain trick in a certain place - you know the drill.
Much of the beauty of the screenshots is present in the finished game. The way the sun gleams on shiny groomed snow and dapples across thick powder is lovely, and highly evocative of the real thing.
And, unlike Amped, the slopes are crammed with incidental detail; lickle snow hares jump about, reindeers stand around grazing and snowmobiles buzz around the place. A particularly nice touch is the way your goggles fall off if you land on your head. We like this kind of thing. But the visual wonderment is let down by occasional juddery slowdown and the game is a teeny, tiny bit glitchy.
The way objects react when your 'boarder hits them is odd. Smashing your way into and through a herd of deer (come on, we had to try it) results in the animals dispersing as if made of fibreglass. It might not seem like much, but there are a handful of things like this that detract from the solidity of the game. It's a shame, because so much work has clearly gone into making it.
The main problem with TransWorld Snowboarding, though, is that it's too easy (as noted in Issue 08's Exclusive Access). If you've ever played another extreme sports game, you'll breeze through this like a veteran on the nursery slopes. It's almost impossible to fall over without trying really hard to do so, but this does mean that you can effortlessly put together the combos needed for the serious scores.
Keeping a massive combo going for ages is fun, but the excessive simplicity of play means there's little satisfaction in nailing a big one. Odds are you'll feel rather nonplussed after seeing most of what the game has to offer after a few goes. This probably won't see you through the long winter months ahead.
TransWorld Snowboarding isn't terrible by any means. But it is average in the extreme, and can't compete with Amped, unless you like your snowboarding really simple.
If you must have another arcade-style snowboarding game, you will get some entertainment from this. But there's months of play to be had from Amped.
TRANSWORLD SURF
Some really great water effects but not enough variation
Extreme sports - Issue 2 (April 2002) - 6.1/10
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Transworld2.txtRead Review
Tucked away in its deepest depth, the blue planet contains all of Mother Nature's maddest secrets and gonky rejects - fish that look like coathangers, for example. In comparison, there's not much happening on its surface.
Well, there are waves - big crashing swells of water perfect for propelling some free-spirited daredevil about on a slice of plywood. And that's where Transworld Surf comes in.
In structure and spirit, this follows the excellent Tony Hawk's blueprint. Choose a dude from a line-up of surfing's A-list bigwigs, then carve your way through several levels of challenges and competitions using an elaborate trick system, stringing together lady-impressing combos as you go.
When it comes to actually completing these challenges and competitions, though, it's an acquired taste. Controlling your rider is cumbersome and frustrating.
It may be an accurate reproduction of the sport, but it's nowhere near as rewarding as the masterclass of freestyle stunt expression that is Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 3. The tasks are a bit lame, but that's what happens when you stage a game on the lip of a wave - there's not going to be that much to do outside of board-based water wiggling.
A serious oversight is the lack of a tutorial level, a training mode or any kind of on-screen prompt. Having to read and learn all the moves in the manual is a real downer, and you're reduced to progress via trial and error.
The showcase effect for a title like this has to be the water, and it's a strangely mixed bag in TWS. As the camera zooms in from its aerial view of the entire bay, straight into the thick of the action, it's gorgeous. The briny in the sunny levels looks stunning - you can almost taste the spray as waves billow, swirling the barrels. But when it's cloudy, the sea becomes an oily slick that looks like a lake of liquid metal.
This may be an authentic and fairly deep take on the sport but, as a game taken on its own playable merits, Transworld Surf is average at best.
TRON 2.0: KILLER APP
Tron 2.0 was probably a better PC game than this Xbox version. Good to see such a comprehensive multiplayer side
First-person shooter - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 6.8/10
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BV00102W)
Tron2.txtRead Review
Tron 2.0 is all about computers, perhaps to a greater extent than Climax intended. Unlike most Xbox FPSs that feel like they've been tailored especially for the console, or at least heavily optimised for it, this game plays like a PC game. It's no coincidence. It came out a year ago on PC and despite a tenacious smattering of Live features, hasn't been significantly updated.
Abundant load screens are the most obvious culprits. Most levels are short but loading times often still break the 20-second mark. Frustratingly, the level also reloads after each death, just when you want to jump straight back into the action and get revenge on the virus who de-rezzed you.
Our other major 'glitch' in the system is the targeting. It'd feel more at home on a mouse and keyboard than the Xbox pad. When throwing your lethal disc, the margin for error is tiny, thanks in part to the minuscule crosshair. You need the kind of accuracy only a mouse can provide. It doesn't help that the disc is the only weapon worth using. Most of the others cause a severe drain on your energy and the burden of backtracking to recharge nodes is bigger than the perks of wielding them.
Although the combat is far from inspiring, we are very impressed by the ability to transform into a light cycle. This really shines in multiplayer, where you can both run around on foot or instantly rez up some wheels and mow through the opposition. Alternatively, it's possible to set the game to light cycles only, transforming Tron 2.0 into an extremely fun throwback of the 1977 Atari game Surround. The object here is to force your enemies to crash into your light trail. Racing around the immense, tiled arenas is fast, colourful and plays better than ever in 3D. Ironically, this retro-skewed game mode is the most fun part of the entire experience. It's equally surprising that the graphics are so appealing, even though they're based on a film about 20-year-old technology. We guess it's a testament to the vision of the movie that the settings and characters still seem fresh and interesting today. Cool graphical effects including light-bloom also helps.
We also particularly like the upgrade feature which works in a similar way to Deus Ex: Invisible War's biomods. Downloading new abilities and choosing which ones to upgrade means that two players could end up with vastly different characters at the end of the game. It's a shame the upgrade interface is so fiddly.
Tron 2.0 offers plenty to shout about in multiplayer, particularly complete support for Xbox Live 3.0 features including voice messaging. Overall, the multiplayer game modes are far more engaging than the story mode, whose biggest failing is a lack of variety. One for Xbox Live maniacs only.
TRUE CRIME: NEW YORK CITY
The gangsters are back, ruder and nastier than before - and with an incredible looking NYC to terrorise. This kicks LA's arse...
Action - Issue 51 (January 2006) - 8.0/10
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AV06902E)
TrueCrimeNYC.txtRead Review
You know a few years ago everyone was going on about games being like movies? But then all that happened was games got stuffed full of rubbish movie clips and got more boring and worse. Well, we've got some good news about that - True Crime: New York City does a fantastic job at shovelling Hollywood production values into Xbox.
The cut-scenes, characters, acting and general presentation of the action here are all quite superb, with top-drawer Hollywood actors and a stylish, cool and a very enjoyable plot being told between True Crime's many shooting bits. Sadly, the plot is that same really old, rubbish one about people getting killed, finding out who did it and unearthing a conspiracy, but the way it looks and unfolds is Triple-A Hollywood through and through.
The New York City part is equally polished and big-budget. The streets are rammed with cars, pedestrians and suspiciously flimsy lampposts to send cartwheeling through the air, giving the town a buzzing atmosphere. Central Park is packed with people that you can drive over or help, depending if you're going for a good or bad cop day.
The controls are way better than those of 2003's Streets of LA. Marcus has a lock-on auto-aim for shooting ease, plus a press of a button kicks in manual override and lets you aim for yourself if you'd prefer. Fighting is simpler and easier with less emphasis on bullet time and martial arts skills, and more importance on hammering A and X. Simpler, but it makes the game more instantly playable.
The whole tedious idea of training your character through Streets of LA's lengthy dojo sections has been obliterated, in favour of letting you buy new skills or, better still, the game just giving them to you when you rank up. It's an easier, friendlier system that removes much of Streets of LA's boring bits.
Also new for New York is a collecting angle that encourages you to clean up the streets to earn money, whether by honest means or by planting drugs on housewives. Each mission starts back at the precinct, and from here you pick your clothes and car for the day - or until you die and have to start again. Instead of just stealing cars you now have an underground garage of cop and civilian vehicles you've unlocked and bought, which lets you drive what you like without having to bank on stumbling across the right car to steal outside.
Buying cars means you're forced to complete random street crimes for the money, making the game a much bigger proposition. The only downside to this precinct business is that you have to start there whenever you load a saved game, so the process of picking a car, selecting your outfit and cashing paychecks does start to drag after a while. Damn paperwork!
What remains, though, is an extremely tight and linear plot. There's not much deviating from the story, with failed missions dumping you into straightforward alternative play sections where you get yourself back on the main story arc. If you play it solely to follow the plot, and ignore the bonus missions that pop up as you drive about the city, True Crime: NYC will be a rather short experience.
The whole good/bad play angle remains to boost longevity many times over, with you able to make Marcus a goody-goody nice cop or have him steal, plant evidence and generally rough up the citizens. It works, makes the street crimes worth solving and gives you a reason to go back to it long after the gangsta plot has been resolved.
Despite all the murders, New York's a great place to be - and the game's better as a result. The city is more interesting than LA and easier to get around thanks to the subway. The story is clichd 'gangsta' nonsense but extremely well presented, plus the good/bad cop city-cleansing missions are a huge challenge that'll have you busting human scum for months. New York kicks LA's arse.
TRUE CRIME: STREETS OF L.A.
Decent attempt at encompassing driving, fighting and shooting, but it can't beat GTA
Driving - Issue 24 (XMas 2003) - 8.2/10
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AV01407E)
TrueCrime.txtRead Review
Picture the scene. The sun's shining, the radio's loud, and you're cruising round the city in a requisitioned car, stopping every so often to rough up a suspect passer-by or two. You'd be forgiven for thinking that you're a hardened thug from Grand Theft Auto 3 (soon to be released on Xbox) and not an officer in the LAPD. And whilst not the most morally sound of professions, the criminal life certainly has its financial benefits. That is, until a multi-clich?d, washed-out cop, Nick Kang, the star of True Crime: Streets of L.A. is called back in for one last job.
Nick Kang is the latest in a long line of loose cannons, with a bag of chips on his shoulder and a van-load of vendettas to see through, recalled to the LAPD's Elite Operations Division to combat the rising level of Triad and Russian Mafia-related violence. The orphan of a disgraced cop, Kang went to the school of the streets and learnt a martial art or two along the way. So, having reluctantly rejoined the boys in blue, he's on a one-man mission of revenge.
But enough of the bastardised cop drama screenplays, True Crime is the real deal. First up and a prerequisite of any big title is a quality voiceover, and the developer hasn't scrimped one bit with the stellar range of talent on display; Christopher Walken on the narrative, Gary Oldman, Michael Madsen and Michelle Rodriguez as characters and Snoop Dogg and Ice Cube on the soundtrack are present, although they struggle with a cheesy script.
Quality's got to have some quantity to back it up, and there's no shortage here. Over 240 square miles of Los Angeles have been accurately recreated, paving the way for a possible 100 manic missions to drive, fight, or shoot through (either via a first- or third-person perspective). There's an impressive amount of freedom here, as our hero is able to commandeer any vehicle he comes across, la GTA, only this time in the name of solving crimes, not carrying them out. So dig out those string-backs because driving plays a big part in this game. Maniacally drive across town (using the handy bottom-left map for navigation) to thwart a robbery or pick up a witness before the bad guys get to them. Be cautious of taking out innocent bystanders though, as while each vehicle handles quite differently, they all have a tendency to slide all over the place when cornering, and public genocide has some very bad consequences. But more of that later.
If the morning rush hour all gets a bit too much, Nick is free to jump out of his chosen vehicle at any time with a quick pull of the Left trigger. You'll spend a lot of time on foot, with two modes of combat to defend Kang against the scourge of society. Hand-to-hand combat is achieved via simple one- and two-button combos, with special moves available once learned in the friendly neighbourhood dojo. Gunplay, however, is far more exciting. Draw twin pistols with a quick Right trigger tap, and handily pick up more powerful assault rifles or shotguns left behind by recently departed foes. Fire again using the Right trigger, but holding it down will engage first-person mode, where time momentarily slows down to make that all-important headshot a little bit easier. Frequently though, you'll accidentally enter this perspective in a haze of quick-fire bloodlust, which can be very frustrating and off-putting during heated gun battles.
Normal cruising sections, (far from letting Kang pick up random guys on street corners, and occurring at the end of each story episode) allow you to freely roam the titular streets of L.A. resolving crimes, alerted via your trusty police frequency. Pursue by car or on foot to apprehend the lowlife, and attempt to successfully bring the suspect down. It's crucial that you use minimum force (and significantly more challenging).
Now why would a badass cop like Kang want to use fists when guns would be easier? Well, pivotal to the game is your good cop/bad cop rating system, typified by the on-screen Yin Yang symbol. Carry out good deeds, like the use of non-lethal force to rescue a mugging victim, and you'll earn good cop points. However, needlessly kill criminals, or run over pedestrians during driving stages, and you'll clock bad cop points. Badge points are also awarded for admirable conduct, and these can be exchanged for street races or training sessions at the gym or shooting range, thus earning upgrades to your car, fighting skills and weapons. The gym and driving challenges are relatively easy, but you'll need frequent use of the 'cover' function (the A button) to get through the tricky shooting tasks.
And so this leads us to the most intriguing aspect of the game... that the multi-branching storyline is seriously affected by your behaviour throughout the levels. Good or bad performances result in different outcomes and, leading into the next varying mission, differing cutscenes. By following multiple paths through the storyline, you'll see a whole host of different characters and the replayability factor is greatly increased. However, nice guys certainly don't finish last here, as although you're meant to have total freedom during the game, a bad cop rating will just lead to several plot dead ends, which could have been exploited a bit more. Thus a good cop status is required to get through most of the story.
A couple of fundamental niggles like these, with occasional camera flaws, unfortunately prevent True Crime: Streets of L.A. from being a truly great and groundbreaking title, but it's still a relatively successful achievement of a very ambitious project.
TUROK EVOLUTION
Disappointing sequel. Feels older than the dinosaurs it features
Action/Shooter - Issue 8 (October 2002) - 6.6/10
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AC00402E)
TurokEvolution.txtRead Review
The Turok series carries a bit of baggage. The first game, Turok: Dinosaur Hunter, was a super-expensive Nintendo 64 launch title. Acclaimed for its lush visuals and atmospheric dinosaur shooting, it also attracted criticism for its irritating platform sections.
Then came a big-hype sequel, boasting an OTT armoury (including the famous, head-emptying Cerebral Bore), gaps between save points that could be measured in light years and not much else. It's fair to say that Turok 2: Seeds of Evil was something of a disappointment.
Two more so-so follow-ups came and went, and now there's Turok Evolution with its new muscular protagonist Tal'Set in another world of outlandish weaponry, big lizards and lush jungles.
Dive straight into the first mission with high hopes of a Jurassic lark, and you might be a little disappointed. Back on N64, the jungle of T:DH was foggy, but it was atmospheric, sweaty and claustrophobic. On Xbox - a console that could have the N64 as a snack between meals, let alone for breakfast - the jungle is a bit gaudy, and poorly textured.
In this day and age, we've come to expect good lighting as standard, and that is noticeably absent here. Without it, the resulting cartoon-bright, plastic look of the daytime levels feels odd in a game like this. The later night levels veer uncomfortably close to N64-style brownness, and the texture quality is poor.
After the first set of levels, the game switches to a third-person, flight-based shoot-'em-up, with you in control of a pteranodon equipped with missiles and guns. It's the first time the Turok series has taken a departure from first-person gameplay, and it's okay once you've tamed the rather unwieldy beast.
However, players keen to shoot dinos in the first person (the reason many people invest in a Turok) might not be too impressed. It's a nice idea that hasn't been implemented well enough to improve the overall experience.
Wade through the first jungle and flying sections, though, and you'll find things get much more interesting. An ascent of a mountain path is livened up with a natty sniper pistol, and interesting new weapons start to present themselves as you progress.
There's some variety in the gameplay, too, with one set of levels requiring Tal'Set to infiltrate an enemy camp under cover of darkness. Yes, it's stealth time, and it works well. Shooting poison arrows into enemies and then ducking for cover while the poison does its work is tense and satisfying.
Turok, though, is all about the weapons. If there's one thing that distinguishes this series of games from other first-person shooters, it's the long list of devices that you can kill things with. This instalment is no exception.
From the sniper pistol onwards, the weapons get better and better as you progress. The accompanying effects are great: from the heat-haze explosion of the rocket launcher and flame-thrower to the excellent remote control spider mine.
These cool new toys encourage progress, providing a strong incentive to get to the next area, but they also highlight the old-fashioned nature of the game. Guns found early on in the game are pretty much redundant when more powerful weapons are found later.
And for some reason, the handy, quick select weapon wheel of previous Turok games has been ditched, so that you now have to cycle through weapons to find the right one. It's a very annoying task in frantic situations.
An equally grumblesome feature is the poor enemy artificial intelligence. While foes will duck for cover on occasion, nearly all opposition creatures are dense cannon fodder.
It's not that they're not fun to fight against - many of the pitched battles can be very satisfying - but you never find yourself completely swept up in the game world. Enemies never seem to consider their environment at all.
Things have moved on, but Turok Evolution hasn't evolved as much as it maybe likes to think it has. In the light of advancements made in the FPS genre, this game feels as primitive as some of the lizards you have to shoot, especially when dying leads to a lengthy trip back to the start of a level.
The game does pose a stern challenge, with teleporting enemies and longer levels being used to prolong the experience the further you get into the game. Sadly though, it's the kind of toughness that tests your patience as much as your skills, since enemies are always in the same place each time you play. Players keen to see the end must be prepared to put in some hard, frustrating work; often, it's only the urge to see the next weapon that keeps you playing at all.
The multiplayer mode is shoddy, with a low frame rate, muddy and indistinct graphics and some uninspired arenas preventing it from being a genuine contender in the multiplayer FPS stakes.
Ultimately, the frantic, flashy battles in Evolution do provide some fun. But in the wake of Halo, and with plenty of other big-name shooters Xbox-bound, it does feel as though the series has run into something of a dead end.
Turok fans may find that this works its way into their consciousness like a Cerebral Bore. For the rest of us, the unadventurous, old-fashioned gameplay is likely to be a different kind of bore altogether.
TY THE TASMANIAN TIGER
Not just for kids. There's plenty here to challenge older gamers
Platformer - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 7.6/10
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EA04101E)
Ty.txtRead Review
'No worries, mate!' is a phrase you'll hear over and over again during
Ty the Tasmanian Tiger. It's a constant reminder of the fun and carefree attitude that runs through the game.
Deep in the Australian Outback, Ty must collect five magical talismans to rescue his parents from suspended animation. Evil dodo Boss Cass has sent his minions - lizards, razorbacks and crocodiles - to thwart the Tasmanian tiger's rescue attempt.
If everything sounds a bit cute and cuddly so far, well, it is. All the characters are bright and colourful and the world Ty inhabits is lush and full of detail. The opening hub level is full of cartoony touches like harmless wallabies hopping about and ants crawling across the dusty plains.
The scale of some of the levels, including Rainforest, Coral Reef and Snowy Mountains, is surprising. They're non-linear and you can have fun exploring without getting lost, thanks to a useful in-game map. Thankfully, the map doesn't give away all the secrets.
Aside from searching for the five mystical talismans, you also have to locate Golden Cogs, rescue Ty's Bilbie friends and find Thunder Eggs, Rainbow Eggs and boomerangs. Such a wealth of items to find would normally be a good thing but it's all thrown at you right at the beginning. You don't really know what all these things actually do until you've collected them.
Ty is easy to control. Initially, he can deliver a powerful bite and throw his boomers. Later on, he discovers boomerang upgrades and plenty of other new skills. This helps to keep the game fresh in the latter stages. Aiming the boomerang is nice and easy, thanks to a useful first-person crosshair activated with a press of the Left trigger.
If there's a single major criticism of Ty, it's the shameless borrowing from Rare's benchmark platformers, especially Banjo-Kazooie. But Krome Studios could not have had a better role model, and has incorporated the finest qualities of the platform genre into this game.
Describing this as 'just for kids' is wrong. While the fun and colourful characters will keep nippers entertained, there's plenty here to challenge older gamers. Ty won't hold your attention for as long as the sublime Blinx, but this is still a worthy addition to any platform fan's Christmas list.
TY THE TASMANIAN TIGER 2: BUSH RESCUE
Far too generic for hardcore platform fans but younger gamers will love it. Pass if you're over 12, though
Platformer - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 5.7/10
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EA09902E)
Ty2.txtRead Review
No sniggering at the back! Bush Rescue is a GTA-style kiddies' romp starring the entire catalogue of Australian animals. And despite the dubious name, you won't see a beaver anywhere.
On initial contact with Ty The Tasmanian Tiger 2: Bush Rescue, you'll roll your eyes and mutter something about 'bloody platform games', or 'generic ballsy rodent game character rip-off sequel'. Both would be correct - this is a platform game with another not-quite-as-cool-as-it-thinks-it-is leading character, and there are gems to scramble around collecting, but it's the GTA-style mission structures that give some breadth to the otherwise paint-by-numbers gaming, just as it did the original.
You'll be bombing around on the back of a Yute, diving through billabongs and interacting with all manner of Aussie inhabitants, just like in the first Ty title (Issue 10, 7.6), but this time the action has been cranked up a notch. Ty can now leap into the cockpit of giant clunking mechs or behind the turret of a mounted mortar gun in an attempt to broaden the scope of gameplay. And although it does so, the whole thing still feels as though you've played it in its entirety before.
The sub-missions which see you walloping stray crocs in the sewers or testing out battle arenas for your mad professor friend are fine distractions, but nothing other than distractions. They're certainly not awe-inspiring slices of innovation.
Where Ty 2 does push back the borders of banality, it does so with small touches and incidental things. Many levels are filled with beautiful blink-and-you'll-miss-them moments such as the Koala RAC going about their business hauling a car to safety after plunging from a bridge, or old inhabitants of towns stopping for a chat with their friends. It may not actually add anything to the game, but its endearing nonetheless.
Ty's rack of boomerangs is back and fired up too, ranging from the standard 'rang' to the kaboomarang (guess what that does), the infrarang, x-rang, and the megarang. Each has its own attribute, be it the ability to destroy metal crates or, in the case of the x-rang, be able to spot bad guys in disguise who'd seek to sabotage your do-gooding.
Despite these blips of interest, despite the cute animals going about their business and the cute things you're asked to do with your 'rang (we could think of a few), Ty 2 remains flat. It feels as though it's been designed by people who market rubberised cheese in the shape of string under the pretext that's it's somehow cool. A Tasmanian Tiger needs more than just a 14-year-old's haircut and 'tude to make him a platforming icon. Look at Crash - he never utters a word, yet is infinitely cooler.
But what's the point in splitting hairs over which marsupial has more cred? Ty 2, for all the effort (and don't get us wrong, a lot of effort has been applied), retreads such a familiar path, and feels so utterly vacuous, you might just as well look at the box and consider the game completed. A solid attempt, but nowhere near as inventive as it needed to be.
UEFA CHAMPIONS LEAGUE 2004-2005
Enjoyable but by no means essential. Pro Evo 4 is still the footy title to own
Sports - Issue 39 (February 2005) - 7.8/10
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EA11201E)
UEFAChamp.txtRead Review
Well, they've certainly managed to get the referees right. One-nil down to Maccabi Tel-Aviv in the opening qualifier, the clock ticking down to 90, you steam into the penalty area, only the keeper to beat, you shimmy, dribble, pull back the trigger, and then - WHAM! A stray right leg pole-axes you ferociously into the muddy turf. "Penalty!" you scream. "Play on!" retorts the referee as your Champions League aspirations vaporise in one blurry instant, and the vultures start composing tomorrow's headlines: 'Mr Bastard Sacked as AC Milan Crumble At First Hurdle'. Oh, it's a ruthless, ruthless game...
More than anything, UEFA Champions League prides itself on dodgy refereeing decisions, like the kind you get in the real world. Borderline offsides, ridiculous red cards and penalties for fouls so far outside the box, they may have well been committed in the car park up the road - this one's got the lot. We're even expecting a two-yards-over-the-goal-line 'goal' to be ruled out as soon as we draw Manchester United. But hey, UEFA Champions League is actually quite realistic in other ways too. In fact, it's surprisingly quite good.
It's essentially quite similar to FIFA Football 2005 (Issue 35, 8.9), but tailored like an action adventure. The main Season mode doesn't let you view domestic league tables, transfer players when you want, or even kick off every match at 0-0. Instead, it often sets up scenarios, shoving you in a match 30 or so minutes down the line and challenging you to overcome various deficits. It's all about bounce back ability - being able to turn on the style when the pressure's on; defying the odds and achieving even more unfair objectives set by your fascistic chairman. Of course, you can still customise your own tournaments and leagues too, and the Season mode does let you enjoy many 'full' matches. But the onus on this game is its storytelling feel, something that gives UEFA a unique twist.
But let's talk about the main footballing action and to be fair, it ain't half bad. Developed by a new team up at Vancouver, it's solid, playable, enjoyable fare. The animation is good, the passing generally crisp, and a neat addition to the controls is the ability to decide when to send nearby players on forward runs. Sadly though, it just isn't Pro Evolution. As hard as it tries, the responsiveness can feel a tad sticky, and your players are also erratic - sometimes they lose the ball the instant they receive it; other times they flashily turn an opponent, which totally catches you unaware. And some of the movement just feels too predictable.
Still, if you're a massive football fan and enjoy European Cup action much more than domestic league drama (i.e. you don't support West Ham), UEFA Champions League is worth the effort. Amongst other things, it's got Live tournaments and decent multiplayer. But to everyone else (and it's a bit of a clich), Pro Evo 4 (Issue 35, 9.4) is still by far and away the essential footy title to own.
UEFA EURO 2004
Xbox's most realistic and technical football sim, let down by limited team options and no Live play
Sports - Issue 29 (May 2004) - 8.4/10
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EA07409E)
UEFA.txtRead Review
With the customary all-day drinking sessions, seasonal armchair supporters and giant national flags hanging from every bedroom window, the Euro football championships always spark a wave of municipal momentary madness, and although Codemasters may have jumped on this like David James would smother a withering daisy cutter, EA didn't want to miss out on the party either.
Already home to the fantastic FIFA 2004 (Issue 23, 8.7), it's no surprise that Euro 2004 is the FIFA engine in an away kit with a couple of neat new skills. Focusing, unsurprisingly, on all of the European international teams, there's the usual match choices of Friendly, Tournament, Practice, Penalty Shootouts and Fantasy, where players pick their ultimate Euro dream teams. The mediocre Career mode involves taking a team through the Euro qualifiers to the knockout tournament, and ultimately the Euro final itself. Once again there's an impressive lineup of customisable options, from formation and tactics to the direction and precise positions your squad will assume for free kicks and corners.
The gameplay itself is again a fantastic balance of team-based fluidity and individual player skill. Passing is measured and responsive, and the one-two manoeuvre, a staple of fast, attacking football, is easier than ever to pull off with a quick double-tap of the A button. In fact all three methods of passing are very intuitive, and mixing up short accurate passes and weighted lofted balls is an authentic and satisfying experience. The opposition AI is both attentive and realistic; defenders will press and close down attackers when necessary, yet also track back at the appropriate times. Because of their intelligent positioning, more often than not it's vital to use the through-ball option on every attack, playing the ball into your striker's path as opposed to directly to his feet. The individual player skills return, accessed via the Right thumbstick, which sees your prima donnas jinxing back and forth, dropping shoulders and nutmegging the opposition. Aside from looking ace, this radically enhances gameplay as along with getting out of a tight spot, it allows the individual merits of each star to shine - making dribbling and turning infinitely easier. The brilliant, albeit somewhat tricky 'off the ball' option also makes a welcome appearance, where players, when in possession, can select specific receivers for pinpoint passes
So what's not to love? Well, along with a bit of graphical gloss (although the characters still look a bit rough around the edges), we're pleased to say the game plays better than ever. Calmly play into the opposition's half, and they'll mark and move in a measured way. Sprint through however, relying on skill and dribbling ability, and the AI team shift up a gear and significantly up the pace of the game. A couple of great new features compound this. Along with a new Free Kick mode, budding Beckhams can now precisely deliver crosses and chip keepers by using the X and B buttons respectively, in conjunction with the Left trigger.
However, when you get to the real core of the game, Euro 2004 has unfortunately got less meat to it than what's between most Premiership players' ears. Four-way multiplayer is a brilliant laugh, but if you take away most of the chuffer teams, there's the option of only five or six decent squads to play with. This is reflected in the single-player game too, as there are only so many times you can play through the Euro championship, and this makes Euro 2004 look limited compared to the expansive likes of FIFA 2004. And whilst we're on the subject of multiplayer, we know it's getting tiresome but the lack of Xbox Live play with EA games really makes Euro 2004 suffer in light of England International Football, the first Live playable footy sim.
Euro 2004 slots home a tidy little game, which plays brilliantly and includes loads of great little touches. The emphasis is on 'little' however, but a lacking single-player game shouldn't detract from the fact this is four-way footy at its best, and almost grasps Jules Rimet greatness.
UFC: TAPOUT
Brutal two-player fighter but a bit one-dimensional if it's just you
Beat 'em up - Issue 3 (May 2002) - 7.4/10
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US01301E)
UFC.txtRead Review
Ultimate Fighting Championship, for those of you not into American extreme fighting franchises, is the most brutal, bloody circus of men-in-pants violence you can imagine. Psychopathic rednecks kick and punch each other until they pass out, or one of them begs for mercy by slapping the floor - the 'tapout' of the title. Of all the sports in the world, this is the one you'd really want to have a doctor's note for.
All of which makes it ripe for a video game adaptation. It's not hard to see the appeal of smashing a lairy muscleman in the face, and here there are none of the life-threatening consequences you'd get in real life. UFC: Tapout features 27 real-life UFC thugs ready to belt one another around the chops, and like the sport it simulates, it's savage.
It feels like a hybrid between a hulking, grapplesome wrestling game and the faster fisticuffs of something like Dead or Alive 3 (Issue 01, 8.5). Each of the four main buttons is assigned to a different limb, allowing for some swift left-right-kick combos. Pressing buttons together allows for grapples and counters - both of which are essential techniques if you want to leave the ring with an intact face. It's also an intuitive system that lets you get stuck in quickly, and also learn new techniques as you go on.
As you get into the game, you'll find yourself guffawing and wincing in equal measure as you smack a scumbag's face into the canvas, splashing his blood all over the place - it's like Jerry Springer, but without all the intrusive morality. But once the initial amusement (or horror) at the violence has subsided, what's left is a playable, if unspectacular, fighter.
The uncompromising violence means that bouts don't tend to last long. Each fighter tries to wear the other down with nose-splitting punches and shin-crunching kicks before grappling them to the floor and bludgeoning them into unconsciousness. Fights lengthen dramatically once you get the hang of the counters, letting you turn practically any attack against the aggressor.
But despite the generous amount of fighters, there's not a huge amount of variety in the way they play or look.
Whereas a beat-'em-up like Soul Calibur or Dead or Alive 3 provides wildly differing characters and outlandish moves, Tapout is constrained by its realism. Although the combatants boast different fighting disciplines like wrestling or kickboxing, they don't really feel that different to one another - meaning there's a lack of variety in the combat.
It's a mixed bag in the looks department, too. The characters are well done - never have thick-necked men in pants been so lovingly modelled and animated. They all look just like their real-life counterparts (check the amusing mugshots in the menus), are packed with plenty of detail and they move smoothly. But this graphical excellence doesn't extend to the fighting arena, which consists of a drab canvas and a dark, almost black background. It looks like it was cobbled together in a hurry.
There are other annoyances, such as the TV-style presentation, which attempts to show grapples from a ringside view. Occasionally it uses an angle that puts a fence-post directly between the camera and the action. When it happens, it's all too easy to lose the bout because you can't see what the hell is going on - which is very frustrating. Capping it all off, is the poor presentation. The menu screens are functional enough, but they look cheap and nasty.
But for its faults, the game achieves what it sets out to do - provide remarkably vicious fights by the ambulance-load. The punches and kicks that you rain down upon your opponent are solid and painful, and successfully flipping an opponent onto their back and punching their lights out is satisfying in a primal way.
The fighting core of Tapout is very playable, and matches between two players familiar with the counters and grapples can be a lot of fun. Single players may get bored quickly thanks to the lack of variety, but with a friend to fight, UFC: Tapout becomes something much better, letting you bash one another to pieces in a pleasingly violent fashion.
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN
The Spider-Man and people-eating nemesis Venom make a big mess of New York in this 'comic-inked' extravaganza
Action - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 8.5/10
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UltimateSpidey.txtRead Review
The saying 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it, but cover it with spangly new visuals' might not exactly roll off the tongue, but it must surely be circulating around Treyarch's offices right about now.
The third Spidey game to hit Xbox in as many years needs a gimmick since it isn't based on any movies, so developer Treyarch, presumably eager to keep the flame alive, has looked to alternative influences - namely, the Ultimate Spider-Man universe. Created in 1990 and looking a little elasticised, the Ultimate Spider-Man comic series is a retelling of the webbed wonder's history, told through the eyes of a young Peter Parker. It's a series of tales rather than a single story, so that means Treyarch has been able to cram just about every character ever conceived into a web of storylines. Want to see Wolverine brawling with Venom in a seedy New York pool hall? It's all there.
Fundamentally, very little has changed from Spider-Man 2 (Issue 32, 8.6) The physics have remained the same for Spidey, and the free-roaming cityscape of New York is back, but a few tasty extras have been lovingly ladled out too. New York is now huge, with Pete having to swing back and forth between Manhattan and Queens as he runs errands for Aunt May, goes to college, or collects his pay cheque from his grumbling editor J Jonah Jameson. The random city tasks, such as stopping muggers and clobbering felons, still pop up on the map from time to time to keep you busy, but it's clear this Spider-Man game is focusing on a younger Peter Parker. He's gangly and awkward at the beginning of the game, learning later on to focus his movements and become the hero he was born to be. He also has a complex relationship with Eddie Brock, his one-time friend who becomes his mortal enemy when he's transformed into Venom - the second playable character.
Venom quite literally chews up and spits out the scenery whenever you get a chance to play as him. He can leap buildings in a single bound, eat pedestrians to maintain his energy levels, slam his fists into buildings to climb them, and whip out his gooey tentacles to smash cars and people to bits. He's the anti-Spider-Man - and everything Spidey can do, Venom does better and twice as hard. Their stories run parallel to one another, with one causing panic in the streets, and the other unsure why mysterious scientists in flying machines are stalking Manhattan's roof tops. Don't worry, we won't give it away.
Perhaps the most startling new aspect of this Spider-Man game is the way it's told. A series of comic-book panels illustrates every cut-scene (and some actions scenes) perfectly, with characters climbing out of the pages, or punching people right through the panels into new areas of the story. It plays like a giant, interactive comic-strip, and with Treyarch's 'Comic Inking' (that's cel shading to us) so tastefully illustrating the whole shebang, you'll wonder what the appeal of the first two Spidey games ever was in the first place. It's a great achievement to make a sequel of a sequel, and yet give it so much life and colour it feels like an entirely reinvigorated franchise. We really can't wait for Ultimate Spider-Man 2!
UNREAL CHAMPIONSHIP
This sets a new standard for multiplayer shooters.
First-person shooter - Issue 10 (December 2002) - 9.2/10 - Xbox Live features ****
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UnrealChamp.txtRead Review
Unreal Championship has been one of the most highly anticipated Xbox games since it was announced in 2000, for three very good reasons. One, it's the latest game to emerge from the well-established and hugely popular Unreal universe.
Two, it has been created from the ground up specifically for Xbox and the Xbox Controller - this is no conversion of a PC game made to fit on a joypad. And three, it's the flagship multiplayer shooter for Microsoft's high-speed online gaming service Xbox Live, the first phase of which, Test Drive, launches on November 30 (see www.xbox.com/uk for more details).
It's this third reason where this exclusive review of the game runs into a small technical problem. Xbox Live doesn't launch until November 30, and even though the option to play online is there on the opening menu, no-one is playing Unreal Championship on Xbox Live and we didn't get the chance to test it using the Test Drive service. (Basing our review on the early Beta testing phase of Xbox Live would not give the correct impression of game or service.)
What you're about to read is how the offline game fares. But don't worry, it still gives you a valuable insight into the game's features: its weapons, controls, maps and various game modes. We'll review the Xbox Live component of the game as soon as we can. Until then, offline is all you need.
Digital Extremes worked on Unreal Championship for well over two years under the careful eye of Epic Games, the company which created Unreal and Unreal Tournament for PC. As with Tournament, Championship is a dedicated multiplayer game, but one that a single player can enjoy immensely. There's no story to follow or cut-scenes to show you what's lurking around the next corner; this is a game of accuracy, timing and speed.
The opening menu presents several different options: Single Player, Play Live, Instant Action, Tutorial, Profiles and Settings. You can jump straight into a game under the Instant Action option; just pick a game style and map and off you go. Think of this like a quick race option in a driving game, only without the accelerating and braking.
If you're new to the whole thing of playing a dedicated multiplayer shooter or wanting to know more (people do take this kind of game really seriously) then hit the Tutorial option to learn the basics.
Skip it and you'll be left wondering how your opponent dodged the rocket that you thought couldn't miss...
Guiding you through your introduction to the brutal bloodsport is a computerised female announcer, who also provides commentary during each game of death.
A new and very important feature of Championship is the Adrenaline system, which gives you the option of using one of four abilities when your character's Adrenaline level reaches maximum. These abilities can come in very useful during the various types of games.
Before you start shooting though, you'll have to set up your profile. Pick a name, a team of five characters from the extensive list given, choose your team colour from red or blue, then select your difficulty level from one of four levels: Novice, Skilled, Masterful and Godlike.
Novice is definitely for beginners as the bots (CPU-controlled cannon fodder) aren't too aggressive or accurate, but playing the game on Godlike difficulty setting is as hard as nails, if not harder. It almost feels as if the bots are programmed not to miss, regardless of their position on the map.
The single-player game is broken down into an order of five different types of game (all of which are playable online): Team Deathmatch, Capture the Flag, Double Domination, Bombing Run and Survival, with the slightly odd number of seven rounds in each mode.
After you've won the first two rounds of a specific mode of play, the next one will be unlocked. When you've completed and won all seven rounds, you'll be awarded with a gold statue for your trouble.
For anyone who's played a multiplayer shooter before, the Team Deathmatch mode shouldn't present any surprises, as this is the simplest type of game to play. Two teams of five characters battle it out until one of them hits the kill limit, which varies from 10-20 depending on your position on the ladder.
Capture the Flag is another favourite of the multiplayer shooter fan and Championship's stab at it works perfectly. Each team has a base with a flag in it, and the object of the game is to infiltrate the base, pick up the flag and return it to where your own flag is in your base to score.
Your flag needs to be on its spot in order for you to score and the first to five wins. Unlike in Halo, you can actually shoot while carrying the flag, which makes a lot of difference because in Bungie's game the standard bearer is cannon fodder for his opponents.
Double Domination is a frantically paced game that sees teams attempting to secure two separate points on a map for ten seconds to score a point - first to five emerges victorious. Points A and B are on different sides of the map and players have to run over the icons to turn them the same colour as their team. Holding the icons while the female commentator counts down from ten, and the opposition is firing its way towards you, is a rush - especially if you take them out before they make it to the icon.
Bombing Run is more of a sport with guns than any of the other modes as it features a bomb as a ball. Players must be in possession of the bomb when they pass through the opponent's goal to score. Both teams begin in their bases and the bomb spawns in the middle of the map.
Players holding the bomb can pass it to their team-mates but cannot shoot, meaning that support is crucial as you advance towards the opponent's base.
Only when the above four modes of play have been completed does Survival mode become available. This is basically team deathmatch without the team. It's a one-on-one fight to prove yourself as the ultimate champion.
The variety and style of maps in all modes is nothing short of amazing. Each has been designed to suit the particular type of game that it hosts.
Some of the deathmatch arenas feature tight maze-like corridors with several flights of stairs, ramps and lifts while Double Domination maps often feature huge indoor and outdoor areas perfect for team assaults.
Each map has also been created with an astonishing eye for detail. You'll sometimes just want to stop and admire the surroundings.
Maps range from huge ancient temples with tunnels, streams and corridors running underground to complex industrial structures with several lifts arriving at multiple vantage points perfect for sniping. In the vast outdoor jungle arenas, fireflies hover around the action.
Every map will impress you in its own right as each has its own unique feel and characteristics. Some you'll get the hang of straight away while with others it'll take some time to figure out the best routes.
Playing the game with bots isn't the same as playing with human players, but the AI of UC's bots will gladly help you pass the time until Xbox Live is launched.
We did occasionally come across the odd team-mate bot stuck on the scenery or others who just stand around as if they're waiting for Christmas. A quick rocket up the backside soon sorts that out though.
Your team of four bots will carry out the simple commands you issue to them. Pressing the Y button brings up a list of four commands: freelance, defend, attack and taunt. Once you've used them a few times it becomes second nature to quickly issue commands during a frantic firefight.
Our biggest fear was that the game would be so fast and frantic that it would be impossible to improve skills. While the game does run at an incredible pace, it's still possible to aim for the all-important headshots.
Practice does make perfect, as they say, and there's a deep level of accuracy and timing to get to grips with.
Digital Extremes has managed to make the controls as simple as possible while at the same time making them feel solid. Using the Chain Gun is great fun, as the whole screen shakes while the pad rumbles with a vengeance. The overall selection of weapons is also good. But you'll quickly find your own favourites and stick to them. Each one does have its own use though.
Unreal Championship played as an offline game with bots is great. But the prospect of playing in teams on Xbox Live with the Xbox Communicator is mouth-watering. All signs point to it being nothing short of stunning.
UNREAL II: THE AWAKENING
A good, solid conversion of a great shooter. The multiplayer mode has real legs
FPS - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 7.9/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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Unreal2.txtRead Review
Xbox is fast becoming the new home of first-person shooters and Unreal II is the latest in a long list that includes Doom 3, Half-Life 2 and Halo 2. We've also got the world's best online console gaming service to play with. There are almost as many shooters to choose from as there are racing games, which is a very good thing if you like shooting and driving. Good job we do then.
February 2003 saw the PC version unleashed on the public and fly straight to the top of the charts, which gives you an idea of the huge community behind the Unreal games. Not bad considering there was almost a revolt when the PC game was originally released with no multiplayer options whatsoever. It's like releasing a football game with no two-player options in sight. It doesn't bear thinking about really. Good job then, that Atari and Tantalus saw fit to include full multiplayer support straight out of the box for our version. You won't like us when we're angry...
What this Unreal has over the last one to grace the Xbox (Unreal Championship, Issue 10, 9.2), is a story-based single-player game that whisks you off through space to fantastical planets looking for ancient but very powerful and mysterious relics. They're all the rage and it's up to you to find and grab 'em before the various races that populate these planets figure out what you're up to. After a quick training course (that should only be taken if you've never played a shooter in your life ever), you hop on board your little ship and jet off to the first location on the treasure hunt.
First stop is an abandoned factory facility. There's one survivor, trapped inside the command tower, and he can only see you via the cameras scattered around. He'll open doors for you and point you in the right direction, if you agree to save his bacon. The facility might be abandoned by humans, but there's something else lurking in the shadows. The survivor calls them 'monkey freaks' and when you clock one you'll know why.
This is where Unreal II lets itself down. You'd sooner laugh at the monsters (if you can call them that) than run away screaming. Their animations are terrible. It's almost as if the developer created four different frames for them and programmed a line of code to flick between them in rapid succession while making gargling noises. You'll laugh or cry, but scared you certainly won't be. And we have to mention the spiders. Why are we still shooting little spiders? They just get in the way of the bigger things in life, like the daddy spiders. God didn't give us rocket launchers, assault rifles and flame throwers to deal with household pests. More action - fewer spiders, is what we say.
Rant over, because on the whole Unreal II is a very enjoyable FPS. The controls fit onto the Xbox pad perfectly and if you're familiar with Xbox shooters, your fingers will feel right at home. Aiming and shooting is straightforward, but the manic movements of your enemies don't help the situation. If in doubt, just run up to them and fire the shotgun right into their faces at point-blank range - it never fails.
Speaking of weapons, Unreal II packs a serious arsenal. You get to dish out pain with a couple of handgun models, a hefty shotgun, explosive rocket launcher, electric blue shock rifle, grenade launcher (various ammo types), sneaky sniper rifle, rapid assault rifle and even a few organic ones towards the finale. Each weapon has an alternate fire mode so you can cause maximum damage and destruction. It's a shame that with all this firepower under your belt you can't destroy the scenery. Only explosive barrels and crates are on offer.
Certain sections require you to guard areas or objects by placing field generators and rocket turrets. You've got around two minutes before the first wave of enemy forces comes knocking on your door. In that time you must construct a couple of field generators around the landscape the way you see fit and position rocket turrets where you think the enemy's most likely to come from. After you've dealt with the first wave, you get a few moments to repair any damage before the second strolls along. These setpieces make for a nice break in the walk-shoot-find-key-progress process. This feature could have been expanded a little, bringing a slice of real-time strategy into the FPS equation. Maybe next time.
For the most part, the single-player game involves more walking than shooting. This isn't helped by the fact that the assortment of environments - while stunning - is massive. Each level could host a game in its own right and features the trademark level design the series is famed for. More enemies pouring over the hills and stampeding towards you would have notched up the excitement a little. Instead, you get two or three enemies bunched together that don't take long to deal with. Less walking, more shooting in future, please. Still, the levels are truly gorgeous and clearly inspired by sci-fi films such as Star Wars, Aliens and The Matrix.
As your journey around the Unreal solar system progresses, you meet more and more NPCs. And that means the dreadfully overacted dialogue can't be avoided. Just about every sci-fi and action film clich? ever created is in here and at times you can't help but laugh - even when the roof is falling in and the person you're supposed to protect has just kicked the bucket.
Thankfully the background music and ambient noises genuinely add to the occasion. There's even a hint of techno-rock waiting to kick in during some of the more serious firefights and especially when you come face to face with boss characters. And these bosses might look mean, slimy and green, but you can deal with them without breaking into a sweat. The same goes for most of the enemies you face. Playing the game through on the Normal difficulty setting is easy. You rarely die and if you do it's because you've fallen too far. Experienced shooters should jump straight in with Hard for a better challenge.
One of the biggest draws of the long-awaited sequel (if not the biggest for hardcore FPS fans), is the XMP multiplayer mode. This feature missed the PC version but has since become available to download on the web. For the Xbox version though, it all comes in one tidy online-enabled package. XMP is the name of the game and it's all about teamwork - ganging up and going head to head on some very lavish deathmatch maps. Some have been inspired by levels from the single-player game while others have been designed especially for multiplayer carnage.
The best feature of XMP is the vehicles. If you've played Halo (Issue 01, 9.7), you'll know what we're talking about. If you don't know, go find out. There are three classes of soldier to suit up as and each has unique equipment and abilities. Remember when we said we'd like to see the building mini-bases feature expanded a little? Well, it has been in multiplayer. We'll never tire of gunning around in tanks and jeeps, mowing down anyone who stands in our way.
Unreal II certainly isn't a bad game. In fact, it plays very well and looks great in parts. But we can't help feeling that this conversion doesn't do the Unreal universe or Xbox justice.
If you never got round to playing it in all its visually accelerated glory on a cutting-edge PC, then pick it up. Hardcore fans will chew it whole then spit it right out.
UNREAL CHAMPIONSHIP 2: THE LIANDRI CONFLICT
Seamlessly blends traditional first-person blasting with frantic third-person action. Superb
Screenshots - Shooter - Issue 40 (March 2005) - 9.2/10
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UC2tlc.txtRead Review
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We fear change. Especially when powerhouse franchises like the Unreal series are involved. And especially when a game moves away from its established roots and dares to be different. Take Ghost Recon 2 (Issue 36, 7.4) for example. A firm favourite amongst FPS fans, the shift in perspective from first- to third-person alienated the majority of sniping spectres and lost some of the comfortingly familiar characteristics we knew and loved. So we were wary of UC2. As in, lock your doors, stay off the moors, we-don't-like-your-sort-round-here wary. The original was a local game for local people, and we liked it that way.
It came as nice surprise then (read: bloody massive shock), when we got to grapple with Liandri Conflict. At first glance it seemed like any other Unreal title; a slick, smooth game engine, meaty weapons that feel immensely satisfyingly to wield, and the return of all our favourite characters. Yep, UC2 ticks more boxes than pubic lice. Dig a little deeper however, and you'll discover this sequel has evolved far beyond its now seemingly encumbering predecessors...
We kicked off the impressive single-player campaign with Tournament mode. Seven Unreal characters are immediately available, and players follow their individual career ladders through the bloodthirsty, Liandri Corporation-sponsored conflict. The default difficulty setting informs us we're 'Experienced' at the game, though with later settings confidently described as Expert, Masterful and Godlike, you can tell, as is characteristic of the series, that UC2 isn't going to be an easy ride. This sets a precedent for the majority of the game; sneaky camping and sniping gets you nowhere, as frighteningly astute AI will suss your tactics and overwhelm your position in no time. UC2 makes no bones (apart from yours) about its punishingly hard difficulty. Skilful dodging, nerves of steel and faster twitching than an electrified ornithologist are the only way to make progress. Your head's pounding, sweat's dripping down your face and the taunts of your last slaughterer are ringing in your ears. This is brutal, in your face blasting, and we love it.
All our favourite Unreal weapons return, complete with primary and secondary modes of fire. Before each match there's the handy option of assigning your character weapons from the familiar arsenal - one Explosive (rocket launchers, ripjacks, flak cannon and all-new grenade launcher) and one Energy weapon (shock and sniper rifles, bio rifle and stinger gun). This option allows players to really learn each weapon's combos and strengths; the downside is you may ignore the less-appealing (though just as powerful in the right hands) weapons, like the bio rifle.
Each Tournament rung features different game modes for all the characters involved. It's great fun to experiment and master the ton of different Adrenaline powers on offer. Deathmatch and Capture The Flag are obviously present, but also on the roster is the brilliant Overdose. A bastard child of Bomb Run, different coloured orbs will sporadically spawn on a map. Players fight opponents to collect them, then endeavour to leg it to the corresponding reception points. Deposit orbs at the distant, corresponding-coloured gates, and you'll earn six points, or wuss out and go for the nearer, opposing-coloured gate for three. Equally, the longer the player holds onto an orb the more their radiation levels build up and, when they reach the relevant coloured gate, result in a huge 'overdose'. Adrenaline powers are instantly assigned, and you'll temporarily become an unstoppable killing machine - great for barging your way back to the next orb spawn point. Brilliant fun, this game mode sits particularly well with players not inclined to the strategic co-ordination of CTF, and should be an absolute blast online.
Just when you think it can't get any better... hit the B button. You'll instantly be yanked out of the immersive, enveloping first-person view and seamlessly transported into third-person mode - it's quite an out of body experience. And this is when the hammer hits home. Epic, in a masterstroke, has created not only a worthy successor to Unreal Championship (Issue 10, 9.2), but also an innovative new direction to take the series in. And it's absolutely feckin' brilliant.
The great Training mode soon puts any uncertainties to rights. Following the tale of Unreal fave Anubis's pre-match nerves, close buddy Sobek educates players in the ways of moving, jumping, and taking advantage of your new-found liberation. Increased spatial awareness means players can now vault around like never before. Wall jumps are an essential part of getting out of a tight spot, yet would never have worked in first-person mode. They're great for evading enemy fire, too, so hone that 'wall-sprung dodge technique' [groan - ed]. One of the biggest things we noticed was the amount of time we actually spent playing the game in third-person - about 95 per cent of it! Unreal Championship die-hards may baulk at the thought of neglecting the familiar first-person view, but as sacrilegious as this may seem, it's actually more enjoyable than the now-oppressive normal view. Sure, it's great to go all FPS when charging up the sparking ripjack or to get a better view with the sniper rifle, but the lure of our new-found freedom was just too much to pass up.
The other reason for the switch in point of view is the introduction of the fantastic melee combat. Each character has the ability to unleash a close-up attack using their character's weapon of choice (be it staffs, swords or good old-fashioned fists). Faster, weaker attacks complement slower, more powerful moves, though mis-time a lunge from a distance (jump + attack) and a rival player will punish you. Melee combat opens up a huge amount of brilliantly bone-crunching gameplay variants. Holding both triggers creates a shield to protect from range attacks, whilst tapping the Left trigger reflects back an opponent's projectile. It's immensely satisfying to precisely deflect a sniper shot right back at a camping foe, though you'll need nerves of steel to continually bounce back a barrage of rockets raining down. These defensive options really balance the gameplay, and as a result there's no discernable advantage between the safety of ranged weapons and getting up close and personal with your claws. A lock-on function (click down on the Right thumbstick) is available, and though useful for range attacks, is vital when you're going toe to toe with a hyperactive vampire like Janus.
For the ultimate in stylish slaughtering, UC2 takes a leaf out of Midway stablemate Mortal Kombat's book, and introduces incredible finishing moves. Nimble fingers are definitely needed to pull off the tricky combos required to execute them though. Another improvement is the fantastic level design. Whereas UC offered relatively flat and two-dimensional arenas, the killing fields of UC2 boast verticality in spades. Sumptuous cinematics pave the way for some seriously gorgeous visuals, and don't be surprised if you find yourself continually de-rezzed because you're gawping at the beauty of your surroundings. Getting around involves some Prince of Persia-style wall jumping to reach the upper echelons, and every individual character animation is impressive, from the sprightly springing of Selket to the heavier-footed, ungainly gait of Szalor. Power-ups are generously distributed throughout, though due to the frantic pace of the game you'll need to make like Michael Johnson to snap them up, particularly the brutally powerful Unreal Damage icons. Although single-player mode doesn't involve strict missions per se, each stage is elevated above the 'yet another Deathmatch' monotony thanks in part to the unrelentingly good enemy AI, and to the abundance of intelligently designed maps to learn. And even though Anubis is the only character with a complex back story, there's still enough variation in each match to keep the ADD divas happy.
The assorted Challenges are awesome as well. Described by the developer as "near-impossible", they are achievable but will definitely separate the Gorges from the boys. Variants of all the regular modes, they throw players into viciously difficult situations. You could find yourself overcoming the deficit of being 15-nil down in the middle of a Nali Slaughter match, or ten kills down in a team Death-match against three mean robot snipers, with the clock almost up. Though significantly tougher than the main game, players are handsomely rewarded for sweating blood and tears with the wealth of unlockable extras. Game modes, multiplayer maps, alternate versions of each character and even the great Raiden himself are all available once you've mastered these ball-breaking tasks.
But for all its lone gunmen attributes, the heart of the Unreal series has always been its multiplayer capabilities, and UC2 delivers like a rocket to the face. Up to eight players can frag it out over System Link or Xbox Live, in more than 40 stunning arenas. We would've liked to have seen provision for up to 16 players, but then again the frenetic pace of the game means you're never more than a lunge attack away from another opponent. Overdose, though an individual (i.e. not team-based) game only, provides some spectacular edge-of-the-seat moments, and there's nothing like co-ordinating a well-timed flag snatch with double Adrenaline powers in CTF.
There are enough customisation options to fill a Juggernaut's battle armour thanks to the brilliant Mutator game options. Featuring an almost incomprehensible amount of game-changing variants, players can tailor each game to their exact specs, from health and weapon restrictions, to the type of bots and specific match rules. For the die-hard there's even the chance to play as the original UC intended - no third-person view, no melee attacks and old-skool Adrenaline powers only.
You'd think all this bouncing around and blistering pace would cause some slowdown, but not at all. The engine runs super smoothly, and displays some seriously impressive visuals, particularly when you combine several Adrenaline powers like Speed (a blurry screen akin to playing with a bottle of vodka in your veins) and Energy Burst (like throwing a box of Swan Vestas into a fireworks factory) at once.
We feel really guilty about loving UC2. Dirty, almost. We have been so faithful to the traditional FPS over the last few years, never questioning or wanting more. Other first-person floozies striving for our attention also started wearing the alluring guise of innovative powers (Project: Snowblind), but couldn't sway us. Then UC2 sauntered into the room and our jaws dropped. This new shooter in town didn't just impress us, it blew us away with its gorgeous looks, balanced weaponry and unbelievably fun gameplay. We're now scarred by this illicit encounter, and no FPS experience will ever be the same again. For a reality check on the future of shooters, look no further.
URBAN CHAOS: RIOT RESPONSE
Teach evil street thugs to respect the badge. It's the urban crime game where YOU are the law!
FPS - Issue 55 (May 2006) - 8.6/10
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urbanchaos.txtRead Review
If you think British football fans are rowdy when their team loses, you've seen nothing yet. Urban Chaos: Riot Response's brutal, cold-hearted violence and bad language makes GTA seem like a Disney game. We can tell you right now, this is definitely not one for the kids.
No, Urban Chaos is a proper no-messing first-person shooter. You work for the police - but there's no paperwork to fill out or rights to read here. Large gangs of masked, murderous psychos (called Burners) are causing havoc on the streets, lobbing Molotov cocktails all over the place, setting fire to buildings and generally swearing a lot and causing trouble. These scumbags need to be taught a harsh lesson in justice, and you're the policeman who gets to pull the trigger...
Urban Chaos's hard-hitting, face-smashing brutality is so much fun it will please even the Grand Theft Auto generation of gamers, who prefer to shoot at the Five-O rather than join them. You're not just any old cop on the beat, though. You're a member of a zero-tolerance justice squad named T-Zero. The kind of macho specialist unit that gets called out to clean up the mess when the brown stuff hits the fan. Urban Chaos is all about using hefty guns, and more uniquely, your trusty riot shield, to splatter punk brains over walls. The word 'Chaos' in the title is most fitting.
As is the word 'Urban'. The opening scene sets the tone perfectly for the rest of this manic game. Dozens of Burner gang members are attacking a police station, and T-Zero is called in to help. The scene opens with two crazed rioters sprinting down the street clutching bloody meat cleavers. Suddenly the T-Zero van bursts onto the scene, crushing two Burners and skidding to a halt outside the station. Your view jumps to the eyes of your player in the back of the van, and you see one of your partners kick open the van doors before emerging into a scene of utter madness.
Evil punks are everywhere, climbing over walls and running over cars, hollering the S-word. And sometimes even the F-word! As parked patrol cars get raked with bullets, Molotovs are flying in every direction - bursting into flames as they hit the ground, shaking the whole screen violently and leaving you dazzled. In the background, entire residential blocks are ablaze, with flames roaring out of the windows and smoke billowing into the air. You barely get a chance to take it all in when suddenly, a dumpster truck crashes though a wall, exploding and killing three cops. That's just the first mission.
The textures are blurry and the 3D models lack detail, sure, but it's the sheer volume of pandemonium that makes this game look so amazing. It's the kind of on-screen bedlam that will give you a genuine kick of adrenaline. It'll make you squeeze the trigger harder than you usually do, and grit your teeth aggressively as your bullets batter anything that moves. And that's the moment you realise that this isn't Black (Issue 53, 8.4). Your overexcitement will get the better of you, and careless run-and-gun tactics will result in death every time. The Burners are everywhere, so you've got to pick your cover spots, watch your back and, most importantly, use your riot shield.
It's easy to not bother with the shield at first. After all, taking cover behind objects in the environment is a skill you've honed to perfection over years of FPS gaming, so why bother with a shield? It's almost cheating. But you'll soon learn to love it, and use it regularly. Holding the Left trigger brings it up, guarding you from bullets, axes, petrol bombs and whatever else enemies hurl your way. It's see-through too, so you can block an attack then whip out your gun and put a bullet in his head.
Not only is the shield a defensive tool, but also a brutal melee weapon. If a smelly punk gets too close for comfort you can tap the Right trigger to wreck his face-bones, leaving a satisfying bloodstain on your shield. The shield can also be used in more innovative ways - to protect against explosions as you navigate through a burning building, or to get past a jet of flames coming from a crack in a gas pipe by holding it towards them as you pass. Later, you can upgrade to a new shield that's lighter and a more effective melee weapon, but you'll have to complete special objectives to unlock it.
Optional mini objectives are not uncommon in shooters. But when all you get is a few lousy extra per cent on your 'game complete' score or a crap developer video, they're hardly worth the hassle. Urban Chaos has some of the coolest unlockables you could hope for, though, which tie into a clever upgrading system that makes you a more lethal killer as you progress. Simple side-objectives like getting 20 headshots or making five non-lethal arrests with your stun-gun will earn you medals. These medals unlock much-needed upgrades, such as increased weapon power, stronger body armour and loads more. Some upgrades will even change the way you play the game, like the long-range stun-gun which makes non-lethal arrests easier and saves ammo.
You're sometimes given the optional objective of bringing in a gang leader alive. If you do, police will get intel from him which opens new bonus levels - or Emergency Missions. These Emergency Missions are more than just a bit on the side - completing them unlocks new weapons that you'll be able to use from that moment on.
All this upgrading and the clever unlocking system makes Urban Chaos somewhat like an RPG, in the sense that the more effort you put into it, the more you get out of it. You can ignore all the bonus objectives if you want, but if you want to blag those shiny new guns, you'll have to try hard to complete everything, which adds massively to the game's replay value.
But Urban Chaos seeks to ensure that you stay hooked to its gory violence for months after you've finished the main campaign, with some really cool team-based multiplayer action. Players can split into two teams - one playing as T-Zero and the other as Burners - and compete in good guys vs bad guys gameplay scenarios. In one, T-Zero players have to defend an armoured truck that the Burners team are out to destroy before the time limit. And a king-of-the-hill-type mode sees both teams competing to control a specific location for a set amount of time.
But our favourite is the Counter-Strike (Issue 24, 8.0)-style hostage game where the T-Zero team have to sneak or shoot their way into a Burner-controlled building and escort three AI-controlled hostages to safety. The urban levels are well designed, with multiple routes in and out of bases, and there are heaps of potential strategies you can adopt. It's a shame there's no split-screen multiplayer, but we can't wait to see what this is like over Xbox Live.
We were getting worried about Urban Chaos - with long delays and numerous name changes, you can only fear the worst. But now the finished game is finally here, and Rocksteady Studios has turned out a highly polished title. The missions, although basic in design, play incredibly well, with plenty of variety from one stage to the next. One minute you're fighting to retake control of a police station under siege, the next you're rescuing civilians from a burning office block, or rushing to save a VIP hostage from a horrific gang execution.
The clever incorporation of valuable unlockables tied to bonus objectives really gets you playing missions properly, too. You won't just sprint through it like you would with most shooters, because you'll want to earn those big guns, and you'll need that stronger armour. It also adds a great sense of progression, as you see the fruits of your extra efforts come into effect and feel proud of the super-soldier you've created.
Package all this with the solid multiplayer and you've got one superb shooter on your hands. Being a new, unrecognised franchise could prevent Urban Chaos from getting the recognition it deserves - a situation not exactly helped by the three name changes it went through during development. But as a dedicated reader of OXM you're lucky enough to know all about this gem of a shooter, so get out there a give it a go. You won't be disappointed.
URBAN FREESTYLE SOCCER
Terrible gameplay, awful dialogue, shooting too easy, passing too laboured, appalling charactersy
Sports - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 2.0/10
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Urban.txtRead Review
Picture the scene. A group of suits having a brainstorming session at a developer's studio. "Kids love football, right? So why don't we make a football game cool, like adding some hip kids spouting street speak, give them a bit of attitude, and garnish it with popular music. It'll make a great game, won't it?"
That's where all hope for this title ends. Teams of four woefully misguided, stereotypical urban youths (including Skater Boys, Hardcore Honeys and the Taggin' Crew) apparently 'battle' things out in ghetto-style five-a-side courts, complete with those mythical cheering crowds that stand in for pikey kids nicking your kit bag.
The ball control, for one thing, is atrocious. We know this isn't the most accurate footy sim out there, but severe gluefoot makes dribbling ridiculously easy. Your team-mates' AI is just as bad; when you pick up the ball, they'll run everywhere apart from towards the opponent's goal. Apparently street soccer is all about showing off, and the more passes and skill moves are put together, the more your power meter fills up. Once full, you can unleash the 'virtually unstoppable' Netbuster shot, but restrictive gameplay severely hinders this.
Pass to an AI team-mate, and by the time they've finished flicking the ball (instead of passing back to you), they've been tackled and the opposition have scored. Scored, because shooting is ridiculously easy. There's no skill required, just holding shoot from pretty much anywhere will result in a goal, thus negating the entire Netbusting idea. This is compounded by the ineptitude of goalkeepers, as you have no direct control over them until the ball is in their hands. This is an even rarer occurrence though, as while they'll parry nearly every shot into the oncoming path of the opposition's striker, this is punctuated by the occasional save-then-dribble-into-your-own-net lark. Very, very frustrating.
If you can stomach all of the above, there are several modes available, like Turf Wars, Street Challenge, Freestyle and Home Turf. Movies can be unlocked too, and are worth watching for the pure comedy factor of kids trying to act all hard while looking like plonkers.
At the final whistle, UFS started as an alternative take on a football game, but through dire execution and truly laughable presentation, it ends up missing the mark wider than a Gareth Southgate penalty.
VAN HELSING
Run-of-the-mill, yet reasonably enjoyable adventure. Accompanies the film well
Action adventure - Issue 30 (June 2004) - 7.0/10
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VanHelsing.txtRead Review
Vivendi is quite keen on its movie blockbuster/ comic book adaptations. First came The Hulk (Issue 18, 7.5), now there's some beastie bashing based on the Hugh Jackman/Kate Beckinsale film of the same name. Inspired by the mythical exploits of a 19th-century vampire hunter, the game follows Van Helsing as he traipses across Transylvania in search of Dracula, the Wolfman, and other assorted nasties that conspire against his employer, the Church.
Being a hyperactive hero, Van doesn't hang around. So, after a stylishly lit cutscene, it's straight into tearing chunks out of Dr Jekyll's Hyde, giving players the chance to fully get to grips with our hunter's combat, which is a brutally simple mix of melee attacks and impressive Gothic gunplay. Then hi ho, it's off to darkest Transylvania we go, where a village besieged by evil entities seeks the slayer's help. Gameplay involves players working through the ancient streets, cemeteries, castles, a few more streets and some more cemeteries. The scenery may be on the repetitive side, but the waves of varying enemies, including skeletons, gargoyles, ghosts and goblin-esque servants, keep coming thick and fast, so the action never lets up.
As well as supernatural abilities and strength, Van counts on an impressive arsenal to aid his holy war including twin revolvers, pump-action shotguns, electricity cannons and a cool crossbow. Ammo is limitless too, so there's no need to scrimp on the silver bullets during your demonic destruction. Our hallowed hero also packs some fun saw blades and kitana swords as melee weapons. As with most adventure titles, collecting objects is a key feature, as fallen enemies release both health and power-up orbs, the latter of which can be used to buy upgrades.
Although the environments may be invisibly walled imitations of each other, VH offers plenty of replayability, as players gradually discover more powerful weapons throughout the course of the game. These can be used to revisit completed areas and unlock bonuses. Several enjoyable secret time challenges are also available, accessed through finding scattered Easter egg keys and matching them to the corresponding statue. All of Van's weapons have an alternate ammunition mode that's more effective against certain enemies (silver bullets for werewolves, explosive-tipped crossbow bolts for gargoyles), and this adds strategy and replayability to the missions.
It doesn't break any nefarious new ground, but VH isn't a bad movie tie-in. Like its lead character, the game looks a bit rough around the edges, and the automated camera sometimes becomes an issue, often getting confused during hectic, life-draining fights. It's not the longest game in the world either, but Van Helsing should keep fans entertained until vampire-vanquishing fever wears off.
VEXX
Darker than your average fare. Fun, absorbing and distracting
Platformer - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 8.0/10
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Vexx.txtRead Review
When an elderly relative pops their clogs, you'd expect your inheritance to be something dull and, if you're lucky, a little valuable. Some nice brass ornaments, maybe, a cake tin or even a blunderbuss. The last thing you'd expect, or even want, when your grandfather shuffles off this mortal coil, would be a set of glowing all-powerful gauntlets, that carry with them a highly hazardous world-saving quest for vengeance. Can't we just have an ivory backscratcher or something instead?
But hold on. Don't be so quick to try and sell off such an accursed inheritance on eBay. These aren't just any old metal gloves, y'know - they're razor-sharp talons of war, useful for clambering over all manner of obstacles and duffing the crud out of anyone who so much looks at you funny, as well as exacting revenge on the evil-doers who slaughtered your grandfather. And thus the scene is set for Vexx,
a platformer that tries to scale heights other platformers can't hope to reach by equipping the lead character with some enchanted fistwear. These enable him to go hand-to-hand with all manner of nasty beasties in between bouts of high-wire jumping and item collecting.
It's a game that follows neatly in the footprints of 3D platformers gone by. Your main goal, therefore, is to collect special objects - Wraith Hearts, in this instance - in order to unlock themed levels based around a central hub and progress on to the ultimate showdown. Each Wraith Heart requires the completion of a fairly imaginative task to unlock it. On the first level alone (the pastoral Timberdale, a valley filled with waterfalls and sheer cliff faces) you've got a variety of goals to get stuck into. These goals can be anything from taking on the might of a fat-ass mutant sumo wrestler to scaling your way to the very top of a series of floating, sky-high boulders.
There's a good mix of things to do, depending on a combination of fighting and leaping to get things done, and plenty of imagination has gone into the objectives. Some of them do occasionally feel a bit derivative, and you can't help but feel a twinge of d?j-vu as you dodge/long jump your way to the top of yet another platforming assault course. However, there is a whole grab bag of cool ideas, as opposed to the usual fun-size pack, to explore. These include mini-games, set-pieces, and quirky, fresh objectives, such as an impromptu game of football.
The levels have a refreshing, unique look, and are packed with some great colours and detail. Although it never really manages to outrun that twinge of dej-vu we just mentioned, they do make for some cool playgrounds to run about in. And that's really what it's all about - platformer fans are going to love all the exploring.
Vexx himself is a neat little mover, and the wide repertoire of moves is very responsive and straightforward to pull off. The only slight irk with the handling is that he feels a little sluggish where inertia is concerned, changing directions without enough lope.
As far as gameplay is concerned, the difficulty level sometimes makes your adventure pretty taxing. The tasks you're asked to complete are occasionally a little too demanding, but not enough to make you quit. Granted, it has got a difficulty curve like your average Tony Hawk's vert ramp, but don't let that put you off. While Vexx isn't going to revolutionise the genre, it's enjoyable enough for anyone who relishes a challenge. Bagging a Wraith Heart feels like an achievement, and there's a genuine pang of desire to see how you'll get your gloved hands on the next one. And that is how it should be.
Vexx isn't going to be crowned the king among platforming games, but that doesn't stop it having pedigree and feeling like a right regal little game. It currently stands as a very good platformer on Xbox - although the competition is fierce, with plenty of potential candidates to chose from. It's colourful, imaginative and dark to boot - it has a slightly more gothic feel (Vexx wears eyeliner, the lush!) than your typically twee and cartoony platform adventures, and is all the more refreshing for it. Give it a go (give the trial version on last month's demo disc a damn good outing first, if you like), and give it a chance. It's got everything a generic jump/thump-'em-up adventure should have, but it's also kitted out with enough decent ideas and cool tasks to make it into something more than just another wannabe. Vexx may just surprise you.
VIETCONG: PURPLE HAZE
Rugged, robust FPS that sometimes suffers from a stuttering pace but has fantastic multiplayer
FPS - Issue 34 (October 2004) - 7.7/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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Vietcong.txtRead Review
Cruising up the Da Nang river on a tide of Vietnam shooters, Vietcong got called up for the draft on PC last year. Just when it thought its tour of duty was over, it got recalled and shipped over to Xbox, but we're not complaining.
It's 1967, and Vietcong obviously paid attention in military college (rather than getting distracted by the copious amounts of drugs and promiscuous sex that were all the rage), because careful tactics are the order of the day to complete the standard objectives of rescuing pilots, reaching Landing Zones etc. Simply blazing through a level will see you dead quicker than a baby fox during hunting season.
Although not as complex as other squad-based shooters, simple orders can be issued to your team, like disperse, follow etc, and individual members can be asked to carry out unique functions. Moving from cover point to cover point slowly and surely is, well, the way forward.
Each level and multiplayer map is a fair old size, which, when playing online, is a godsend. When working through Campaign mode though, the maps sometimes suffer from a very stop/start turn of pace. Your squad will often creep for a few minutes without spotting an enemy (though mindful of booby traps), engage in a fierce firefight, creep for a few more minutes, have another brief firefight etc. It never becomes a major problem, but a more continuous pace would have been appreciated.
But that's not to say the stages aren't challenging. Top-notch enemy AI (way smarter than your Yank counterparts, who often need prompting to continue following you) ensures players can't simply sit tight and mow down approaching opponents. Nope, these VC will actively seek better cover, try to outflank you and get the hell out of the kitchen to alert others if the heat gets too much.
This is soon put to rights through the brilliant multiplayer. You can play co-operatively over Link or Live on any map against hordes of tough-as-nails VC. It's great fun working through these maps with
a bunch of mates, although Deathmatch comes mighty close. Up to 16 soldiers can fight it out over the expansive maps on offer, as VC vs US Army. There's no real difference between teams (save for starting weapons), and although the character animation isn't the smoothest ever, it all runs at a cracking pace, and picking up weapons is quick and easy - exactly the way multiplayer games should be.
Even coming down from this multiplayer trip, Vietcong remains an entertaining and absorbing shooter in single-player. More than just a straight PC port, it provides no-frills solo action mixed up with fantastic multiplayer options. Although you could overdose on Campaign mode, true hallucinogenic happiness lies in teaming up with a bunch of buddies for a real jungle boogie.
VIRTUAL POOL: TOURNAMENT EDITION
A rough and ready pool sim that's strictly for the die-hard potter fans. And we're not talking boy wizards either
Screenshots - US Sports - Issue 46 (September 2005) - 5.8/10
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Vpool.txt
VOODOO VINCE
An accomplished, instantly involving 3D platformer with dark humour
Platformer - Issue 22 (November 2003) - 7.9/10
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Voodoo.txtRead Review
The Bond film Live and Let Die traumatised me as a young kid. I loved the theme tune, but the movie featured the terrifying voodoo priest Baron Samedi, who caused me to spend many years sleeping with the light on, constantly in fear of a wide-eyed face-painted fiend jumping out at me.
Voodoo has featured in many a film over the years, but not so prominently in the world of games. Now an unlikely hero makes his console debut in the latest release from those crazy folk at Beep.
If the Xbox is guilty of one thing, it's a dearth of decent platformers. Blinx (Issue 09, 9.3) is of course a standout classic, but the rest are either mildly entertaining or unoriginal ports from other formats. Voodoo Vince dares to be different - a cartoon platformer not necessarily aimed at younger gamers.
Madam Charmaine runs a funky voodoo shop in downtown Nawlins (that's New Orleans to you), and has in her possession a large quantity of Zombie Dust. This magic powder has the ability to animate all manner of strange objects and creatures. Evil type Kosmo The Inscrutable has sent a couple of heavies to steal this dust from her shop in a bid to rule the world. During the raid, Madam Charmaine is kidnapped, and the Zombie Dust spilt all over the place. Vince, her third-best voodoo doll, is brought to life, but not before reality is warped and strange creatures have appeared. Now it's up to Vince to travel around various locations of the Deep South in the hunt for his erstwhile mistress.
From the outset, it's obvious that off-the-wall humour plays a big part in this game. As soon as Vince starts to move, look out for the quizzical glance to his non-existent nether-regions, then a resigned shrug to the camera before cheerfully ambling off. Leave the controller alone for a while, and Vince will absent-mindedly remove his eyeball and begin polishing it. Quality.
The main concept behind the game is highly original. Inflicting a world of hurt upon Vince will result in those around him feeling the pain as well, thus beginning an interesting twist on an established genre. Controls are pretty standard stuff, with jumps allocated to A, punches to X and so on. The camera is manipulated with the Right thumbstick, and there is a handy, often lifesaving, option to invert the camera both left and right and up and down.
The driving force behind most platformers is the importance of collectable power-ups, and Voodoo Vince is no different. Destroying enemies results in the release of red and purple orbs. Red boosts your life meter and purple increases your voodoo power. Once full, this enables you to unleash a voodoo attack, by way of jumping and holding both triggers. Poor Vince will inflict a nasty injury on himself, resulting in all enemies on screen suffering a similarly lethal fate.
As you progress through the game, collecting purple skulls enables you to learn more extravagant and humorous ways of masochism, from a chainsaw slicing him (and all surrounding monsters) in half to our favourite - an electro-magnet squashing Vince between a cooker and a fridge.
The game plays surprisingly well. You'll face increasingly difficult puzzles, but none so challenging that they frustrate. The warped sense of humour never falters, from the wacky characters you'll meet on your travels to the sarcastic asides from Vince himself. He's an unlikely hero, but a great character nonetheless.
An early level sees you in a madcap dash, trying to stay alight in order to destroy a troublesome petrol pump, accompanied by old-fashioned chase music. But it's not all jumping and collecting, as several levels require Vince to ride a bucking rat, fly a bi-plane and commandeer a shrimp submarine. These provide a welcome break from the routine and, unlike other titles that try the same tactic, are equally as entertaining as the main game itself.
The settings, from downtown New Orleans to a backwater bayou, have all been lovingly created. Despite the cartoonish feel, everything is covered with realistic textures. Apparently the Main Square and rickety sidestreets were exactly replicated from film footage of the city.
The levels are both numerous (there are more than 30 to complete) and non-linear, so there's loads of exploring to be done around the extensive environments, and finding every collectable will test even the truest platformer fan. The laid-back jazzy musical score really adds to the atmosphere, too.
But as the voodoo religion dictates, good and bad must always be balanced. Whilst not quite sacrificing itself at an altar covered in goat's blood, Voodoo Vince does have some bad points. The concept is original and refreshing but you get the feeling that something's, well... not as good as it could be. The icons you collect limit the way Vince can unleash voodoo attacks, and interactive use of the environment - giving greater freedom and creativity in the manner of these attacks - would have been greatly appreciated, enhancing the gaming experience no end. As a result, the action can get a little repetitive, and when you strip away the gloss and skewed humour, there remains a run-of-the-mill platformer. The addition of cutscenes is vital to relating the storyline, but the option to skip through them would have been welcome.
However, on the whole, Voodoo Vince is a welcome addition to a relatively sparse area of Xbox games, and one that will entertain both kids and adults alike.
V-RALLY 3
Good car damage and framerate, but tracks can be a bit mundane
Driving - Issue 16 (May 2003) - 6.4/10
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VRally3.txtRead Review
There's a bit of a running joke that Xbox is turning into a car park for motor sport games. It seems that every month we're offered further opportunities to get behind the wheel, put our collective feet to the floor and burn more rubber than an arsonist in a PVC factory. We're not complaining though - especially considering the number of high quality titles that have skidded into view in recent months.
Premium rally racers like Colin McRae Rally 3 (Issue 10, 8.9), Rallisport Challenge (Issue 01, 8.5), and Rally Fusion: Race of Champions (Issue 10, 8.0) are the frontrunners in their field. So any newcomer such as V-Rally 3 has to make sure it flies off the starting grid like poo from the proverbial shovel if it wants to compete with the leading pack.
V-Rally 3 is Xbox's first taste of the long-running series and its debut trades largely on its previous success on other consoles. It's a driving title so the setup is fairly standard stuff. You create a driver, take part in time trials to win a place on a constructor's team and then compete in various rallies across the globe in the hope of elevating your team's position in the rankings. You naturally start by being invited to join the less successful teams (with the dodgier motors) and if you achieve goals set by your team manager (finishing above a certain position, for example) you will be invited to try out for some of the bigger outfits.
But what makes a racing game succeed is a subtle combination of handling, realism, sensation of speed and detailed graphical flair. And it's never more prominent than in a rally game where the only opponent is the ticking clock and you're not being distracted by a streamlined convoy of AI opponents waiting for their chance to make you eat their dust. And it's on some of these disciplines that V-Rally 3 starts to lag behind the leaders.
For a start, the handling is not as good as it could be. The car feels incredibly light to control and doesn't have the earthy relationship with the ground that a rallying game dictates. This can be best demonstrated when you're slipping and sliding from side to side - crash into an obstacle and your car will almost float in slow motion before coming back down to earth. It doesn't happen all the time but it does happen enough to dispel the illusion that you're playing a realistic racer.
Rally games naturally have the disadvantage of not being able to race through gorgeous, gleaming cityscapes and instead rely on more sparse rural terrain, so it can be more of a challenge to provide alluring trackside eye candy. But this should give the opportunity to provide stunning vistas and really show off the scenery, as was the case with World Racing (Issue 14, 6.8). Instead the V-Rally 3 backgrounds seem very basic with the standard cardboard cut-out crowd and disappointing landscaped textures. The nice little touches are there: dust clouds, screen water splashes when you occasionally drive through streams and the odd glimpse of dappled sunlight filtering through a forest level all go some way to rectifying the generally drab-looking maps you have to race around.
The damage is also pretty neat with lots of stuff falling off the car. Windscreens get smashed, bodywork gets dented and bumpers hang precariously before being discarded. You can even lose a wheel and limp around the remainder of the course with sparks flying from your axle rather than face retirement and lose valuable season points.
Each race consists of five stages and you only get a couple of chances to repair your car during a rally so you'll often be carrying damage to the next stage, which can dramatically reduce your performance. This adds a valuable strategic element because you can only make repairs inside a set time limit, so you need to choose the most important components to fix in the time provided.
There's also an incentive to keep playing by being able to progress from driving 1.6L putt-putts to the meatier 2.0L beasts. This makes a significant difference to the gameplay because the greater power makes up for the very similar handling of all vehicles in any one particular engine class.
V-Rally 3 is like a souped-up Ford Mondeo: an average racing vehicle that doesn't really excel in any category. It's not a bad game, but it doesn't do anything particularly well either. The rally games we mentioned in the introduction are all more competent, but if you're a rallying fanatic who must own every title then you can do worse than add this to your collection.
WAKEBOARDING UNLEASHED FEAT. SHAUN MURRAY
Outrageous arcade action
Extreme sports - Issue 17 (June 2003) - 8.6/10
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Wakeboarding.txtRead Review
It seems any sport that lets you risk breaking your head is given the O2 treatment these days. Now that little-known wakeboarding has entered the equation, what could possibly be left on the publisher's list? Base-jumping? Synchronised skydiving? Maybe Jackass-style shopping trolley racing?
Wakeboarding, as you'd probably expect by its relative unfamiliarity, is a bit of an oddball. Like Aussie rules football mutates soccer, gridiron and rugby, this high-flying pastime takes elements of surfing, skateboarding and water-skiing and rolls them into one sweet package. Imagine being dragged along by a speeding boat, soaring through clouds like a ragged human kite and bouncing off waves with the intensity of a ball bearing in a pinball machine.
The game itself is rubber-stamped firmly with the familiar O2 print, but with several neat twists to give it a feel all of its own. In fact, despite a similar handling setup, even ardent Tony Hawk's pros will probably require a crash course before executing 100,000 point combos without having their face embedded in the sea floor. A activates jump, X and B prompt grab and air moves, while Y will see your dude embark on a dangerous slab of boardsliding. Gaining speed is perhaps the most sim-like part of its design. As the opening tutorial level generously explains, swinging your boarder towards the centre of a thundering wave, and timing jumps with perfect precision is the key to success and extra height.
Okay, so that's the basics out of the way, now here's the really interesting part. As well as clinging onto your boat, your rider also has the ability to temporarily depart from its guide for a slice of solo venturing. This allows for some short, scenic journeys through obstacle-infested environments. Static boats can be used for tricking off, rocky canyons explored, jagged ridges jumped and dilapidated houses bravely leapt. Winding rails, broken jungle branches and, believe it or not, even aquatically themed rollercoasters all offer perfect opportunities for recording that stat-breaking, injury-defying epic boardslide whether you're alone or in tow. And with practice, you'll soon be able to leave your legions of fans with their jaws on floors. Why not try spinning away from your vehicle, sliding through a spooky graveyard, 'somersaulting' 12 feet up into the air and grabbing hold of your boat's trailing rope just for added effect? That's sure to impress 'em.
In terms of goals and aims, the variety of challenges included in the main Career mode is massively testing. There are the usual level objectives such as notching up an Insane points score, pulling off successive three-move combos or tipping cows (eh?), but there is a huge wealth of strange challenges to be unlocked too. Some of these are truly extraordinary, such as the Deliverance-influenced 'duelling banjos' in the Bayou swamp (trust us, all becomes clear as you play) or rescuing animals in a speedboat.
Now all of this would be a total waste if the game doesn't play. But it does. Oh boy, does it play. For a start, the water physics in Wakeboarding Unleashed are absolutely stunning. As your boarder gains momentum, the waves rock and curve with so much lifelike authenticity it's almost frightening. The controls are fluid, the onscreen movement even more so and the size of scope, challenge and excitement, positively unnerving. Sure, it's just another extreme sports game, which means that it probably won't be flavour of the month for everyone. And for all its stylish twists, subtle improvements and individualities, at heart, the overall experience does not dramatically differ to what's already been promoted in previous O2 games. But don't let that put you off - most of them were pretty good. In fact, we're gonna be hard pressed to recommend a better sport to play this summer. Get this and get drenched.
WALLACE & GROMIT IN PROJECT ZOO
Perfectly rendered characters, huge levels and addictive gameplay
Platformer - Issue 22 (November 2003) - 8.2/10
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Wallace.txtRead Review
Union Jack boxer shorts, The Great Escape and bulldogs aside, for me Wallace and Gromit epitomise everything that's British. A no-nonsense, cheese-loving, slightly eccentric inventor and his faithful companion get into all manner of scrapes and adventures, end up saving the day and are always home in time for tea.
The brainchild of Nick Park and Aardman Studios, and the greatest claymation duo since Morph and Chas, Wallace and Gromit's first outing in the gaming world finally arrives in the form of Project Zoo.
The first thing that strikes you is the graphical quality. Nick Park worked closely with the developers, and his babies are perfectly recreated on screen. The intro graphics are stunning, with great real-time lighting and a high polygon count giving texture to the characters.
The storyline is straight out of an episode too, with the pair's arch nemesis Feathers McGraw imprisoning all the baby animals in the zoo, and enslaving their parents to mine the rich hoard of diamonds buried underneath. Slipping past his guards in a Trojan penguin (seriously), it's now down to our intrepid duo to liberate the incarcerated youngsters and rescue their parents.
The game kicks off as a standard 3D platformer, but as you work your way through each level, the true scale of each environment strikes you. The stages are huge, and thoughtful level designs see the action progressing vertically as well as horizontally, as you travel through the jungle, underground mines and Arctic regions in your quest. Gromit is well animated, and has a series of jumps, kicks and punches to aid him on his way. Simple button combos result in some very funny breakdancing moves too, whilst health is replenished via a supply of Jacob's crackers. Wallace is always a wolf whistle away, and by collecting nuts and bolts he'll fix and modify any broken machinery you come across into helpful gadgets such as Banana Guns, Spring Boots and Gyrocopters.
The game's funny too, shot through with the same sense of humour as the TV shorts. The environments are hugely detailed, and each level also gives you access, by solving simple puzzles, to bonus levels containing more power-ups and unlockables. The downside of this is that these levels must be completed in full before you can return to the main game, which sometimes proves infuriating.
Aside from this and the occasional skewed camera angle, Project Zoo delivers a polished platformer which oozes humour and personality, as well as proving that wearing tank tops can be cool.
WALLACE & GROMIT: THE CURSE OF THE WERE-RABBIT
A fun, faithful and playable movie tie-in. Pretends to be a kids' game, but it's fun for adults and young 'uns alike
Action Adventure - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 8.3/10
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W_G.txtRead Review
Let's get one thing straight. W&G are far from mere kiddie-fodder. And so, pleasingly, is this tie-in sequel. Curse of the Were-Rabbit is a far more liberating experience than the previous Project Zoo (Issue 22, 8.2). Whereas before you'd enter a room, solve required puzzles, advance to the next room, and repeat ad infinitum, this sequel gives you the chance to explore the twosome's distinctive home town, acquiring missions along the way. Not quite on a GTA scale but it's a welcome feature. The upcoming film makes for decent source material, and you couldn't ask for a more faithful or inventive game.
Running Wallace's humane pest control company Anti-Pesto means you get to pick and choose from a satisfyingly diverse range of tasks for the town's inhabitants, opening up a fun range of side missions and mini-games. It's not confined to generic time-based platforming dash-and-grab challenges either - there are more imaginative challenges too. Some involve shepherding pesky bunnies into specific areas using both characters and their different abilities (real brain-scratchers); others have Gromit playing football, or controlling a huge, stuffed dancing were-rabbit. And it may looks like a kid's title, but the action is punishingly tough. What doesn't help at all are the dubious physics of the game. We're not expecting Half-Life 2, but when you're trying to roll a barrel down a hill within a tight time limit and the damn thing either rolls off in a random direction or won't react to your guiding nudges, it's very annoying. Factor in a camera that occasionally just won't rotate as quickly as you sometimes need, and these are slight blemishes on an otherwise top adventure.
There are lots of NPCs going about their comically clichd, small-northern-town business, and though the context-sensitive controls used for conversing with them aren't as sharp as we'd like, they do provide frequent chuckles and some entertaining dialogue. You can instantly flick between playing as Gromit, Wallace and new addition Hutch with a flick of the Black button. It's a definite improvement being able to use the inept inventor yourself to co-operatively solve puzzles with Gromit, instead of him merely being a slow AI sidekick as before. The game looks pretty enough too; visuals are slick and the character animation impressive - the smooth, claylike appearance of each character is perfectly recreated here. The film hadn't come out as we went to press, but judging by previous efforts this looks the business.
Once you've amassed enough reward cards, the duo can turn day into night, and here's where the game really steps up a gear. The were-creatures come out to play, and missions become a much more exciting mix of melee combat; not only does this feel more rewarding, but you also get to play as Hutch, a mutated rabbit who's a much more combat-competent ally than Wallace. It's a shame you have to endure such a large amount of to-ing and fro-ing in order to sample this part of the game, but this is still a worthy accompaniment to the series. That's just grand, lad.
WHACKED!
Shows how a party game should be done. Fun to play
Party - Issue 11 (XMas 2002) - 7.5/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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MS03901L)
Whacked.txtRead Review
Multiplayer party games might be a bit of an acquired taste, but the variety, pace and visuals of Whacked! should appeal to many. The first game of this type to land on Xbox was the average Fuzion Frenzy (Issue 01, 4.5) which failed in all aspects to show how much fun a multiplayer party game can be. But here, even when playing in single-player against the computer-controlled characters, there are enough laughs to keep you wanting more.
Which says nothing of the promise the treats the Xbox Live aspect holds in store.
Whacked! is the name of a TV show presented by over-the-top host, Van Tastic, who walks you through each stage of the show armed to his big white teeth with a gag for every occasion. Some are genuinely funny while others are scraping the barrel, to say the least.
Gameplay in Whacked! is split into two different modes. There's the single player Gameshow mode, and there's Battle mode for multiplayer matches played either split-screen, via System Link or on Xbox live. Should you want to hone your skills first, there's also a Theatre mode that shows you the basics. But as the controls are pretty simple (one button to attack and one button to jump) you won't be at a huge disadvantage if you leap in at the deep end. But before you can play either you'll have to select your character from the four very different personalities open to you at the game's start.
There's Eugene, a geeky-looking green penguin; Toof, a creature that defies all description; Lucky, a permanently angry rabbit; and Lucy, a cheeky female dressed only in stockings with nothing but little strategically placed bars over her private parts. And no, you don't get to see her fully naked, even though she tries her best during the show (Van Tastic just won't allow it). Four hidden characters are also in there waiting to be unlocked.
Once you've chosen your misfit it's off to the selection room to choose your first game. A game of Whacked! comprises three stages, and to complete each, nine matches have to be played. You can play these in any order you wish, but you must complete all of them before moving onto to the next stage.
Whacked! features six different game types. Most of them pit all the contestants against one another in manic slap-'em-ups to the death. But one of the first games you'll come across is played purely solo - Chicken. This dumps you into an arena on your own, and to win the round, you have to collect a set number of silver stars by destroying chickens. Each rooster you destroy nets you a star. Collect 50, 100, or 200 (depending on which stage of the show you're at) and you're through to the next round.
Combat is a free-for-all where the first player to collect the set number of stars wins. Grab 'n' Run sees you having to hold a trophy for a certain amount of time to win, while the others throw everything that comes to hand at you to make you drop it. Dodgeball finds you all dodging huge, red, bouncy balls with the last one standing winning. In King of the Hill it's the first person to accumulate three minutes of time by standing on green swirls that appear around the level. And last but not least is Fragfest, where the player with the most kills once the timer has run out wins.
What's surprising about Whacked! is how playable it is given the amount of chaos going on. The Left stick moves you around the level, while the Left and Right triggers are used to strafe. This allows you to easily zigzag around collecting stars, weapons and power-ups. Only two buttons are used - one for picking up and firing weapons, and one for jumping.
The levels are brimming with elements the player can control, such as a super-weapon that, provided you've collected a battery, takes you into first-person mode for some serious cartoon carnage. Handy when you're lagging in a game of Fragfest.
Also impressive is the variety of weapons, as each level you complete unlocks a new one. You'll get to play around with plunger missiles, cluster ducks, mallets, staplers, pitchforks, beehives, cannons and freeze guns to name but a few. Whacked! is a simple game to play, but winning can be anything but, especially on Xbox Live where you'll always be able to find a bigger fish. But at least you'll have fun trying.
WHIPLASH
Involving with an off-the-wall sense of humour. Great fun with a novel combat method
Platformer - Issue 27 (March 2004) - 8.1/10
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Whiplash.txtRead Review
Here at OXM, resident veggies Vanessa and Ben L (the rest of us are all ardent carnivores) are positively disgusted at the thought of animal testing, but the rest of us concede it's necessary for the furthering of medical science and, more importantly, the development of better cosmetic products.
What's not acceptable, however, are wild experiments involving the frighteningly titled Genetic Recombinator on over-the-hill, post-laboratory animals, whereby new species are created from two existing ones. This predicament is the ominous fate that awaits the two intrepid heroes of Eidos's new platformer, Spanx the weasel and Redmond the wise-cracking rabbit. They've been chained together, caged and are sadly destined for an unsightly end in the laboratories of the evil Genron Corporation, but manage to escape at the last minute.
Both characters are introduced through comical bullet time sections in the opening cutscene (which is cleverly styled like a corporate promo vid), and this is the first evidence of the warped, totally off-the-wall humour underlying the game. Poor old Spanx has had a bit too much electro-shock therapy, and Redmond sports some permanent remnants of cosmetic testing. However, the tethered twosome manage to use their arrangement to their advantage, as the overuse of the experimental DuraSpray on Redmond has turned his fur harder than Watership Down's Fiver, making him rather handy as a makeshift mace.
Players must navigate the huge Genron Corporation building, all the while guided by a mysterious, ethereal voice that, as Redmond remarks, sounds remarkably like the guy from movie trailers. While Spanx stays completely mute throughout the game, it's the frequent quips from Redmond that keep things interesting, as the alternative humour gets cranked up a notch.
We assume the standard platforming routine from here on in, of running, jumping, whacking, collecting, ad infinitum, back to start and repeat. The levels are both expansive and make good use of available space, but there does still remain a 'flick switch in room A, go to room B, flick another switch, return to room A, flick different switch, go to room C...' mentality. This can become a bit tedious, but is countered with the well-measured escalating difficulty of each puzzle, though your omnipresent guide is never far away should you get stuck.
Combat centres around attacking enemies with the aforementioned (albeit constantly protesting) Redmond. X and B, when used in conjunction with jump (A), enable Spanx to unleash numerous whips, smacks and beatings. This provides a humorous and very effective method of fighting which adds a bit more variety to the gameplay. But his usefulness doesn't stop there, as Spanx can employ Redmond in a number of ways. The rock-hard rabbit can be a grappling hook, or used to clog up machinery and block toilets, all in the interest of both characters' freedom. This skewed sense of humour really makes Whiplash stand out from its platforming peers.
Another novel idea is the concept of each character levelling up, as for every enemy defeated, they'll give up small bags of treats, or Hypersnacks. By amassing totals of these, and deciding precisely where to assign them (between Spanx, Redmond and the reserve pool), players can increase the strength, stamina and attack capabilities of one or both characters. Completing all the goals on each level will garner you a bonus Boon, or level-up option. This definitely adds a strategic element to the title, more akin to an RPG than a platformer, but significantly increases both the depth and replayability of the game.
However, why is it so often the case that developers obviously put a lot of time and thought into the development process (as here) only to let a frustrating, unpredictable and hindering camera ruin the experience (definitely as here)? So many titles feature random zooming in during combat and the obscuring of certain angles that results in blind leaps of faith. Unfortunately, Whiplash is guilty of both. Certain levels require players to hop aboard giant gun turrets (that fire flaming chickens, naturally), but the camera suddenly decides to invert. And not only on the vertical axis, but on the horizontal axis too. Which is very, very frustrating.
Whiplash could have been an outstanding game were it not for the glitchy camera but, if you can see past that, it's one of the better platformers out there and whips its contemporaries into shape.
WINBACK 2: PROJECT POSEIDON
The war on terror boils down to a game of hide and seek in this old-school shooter
Action - Issue 56 (June 2006) - 6.9/10
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winback2.txtRead Review
If all the names a cold-blooded terrorist might use against those trying to take him down, calling someone a "wussy" like it's a scrap in the school playground probably isn't in the book of top 100 insults. There are plenty of words that would be more appropriate, most of them with four letters in. But getting branded a wussy is something that'll happen to you a lot in Winback 2, with your anti-terrorist team members spending 90 per cent of their time hiding behind cover. Well, it's the only sensible alternative to getting shot to bits.
You see, there's only one tactic that works in Winback 2, and that's propping yourself up against a wall or a solid object and popping up when there's a break in enemy fire to unload a few shots yourself. Save for running out into the open guns blazing and dying an inglorious death, it's the only tactic available in Winback 2. This is a one-trick pony of a game that gives all it's got to offer in the first level, but does it well enough and gets the difficulty balance just right that by the time it's all over you'll at least feel like you've earned the right to see the end cut-scene.
Any given shootout goes something like this: you enter a small room, a handful of enemies scramble to various cover points, and you have a few seconds to get behind cover yourself before they open fire. While in cover you can move the crosshair to target an enemy before stepping out to fire, which is crucial to your survival. Emerge too soon while an enemy is still firing and any bullets that hit you actually knock you even further into the open, leaving you more vulnerable to any fire from other enemies.
It's a game that demands perfect timing and accuracy. Timing the moment to open fire when enemies are either reloading or moving to another cover point, and being accurate enough to take them down in the small window of opportunity. Fortunately, you can target individual body parts such as the head, arms, legs or torso, with one headshot being all it takes for an instant kill and two shots for anywhere else on the body. Hitting his right arm causes an enemy to drop his weapon, while shooting his left arm removes his grenade-throwing ability. If you really want to earn the best score at the end of a mission, a second shot that hits either the arms or the legs of an enemy results in him dropping to his knees and putting his hands on his head, which signifies an arrest.
Although this is pretty much the entire game in a nutshell, Winback 2 tries to mix things up with a so-called 'Route' system, involving two out of the three playable characters in any one mission. At the start of every level you're given a split-screen view of two operatives who begin the mission in the same building but at different spots. You're then handed control of one character and must complete your objectives as normal until the mission resets and you play through it again from the other character's perspective.
The idea is that the first character spends most of his time either clearing out enemies so the other has a relatively safe passage, or unlocking doors and deactivating security lasers located in his team-mate's route. And to a degree it works rather well, with many of the 'Assist' and 'Unlock' objectives pitting you against a pretty severe clock. There's also the occasional neat moment when you can spot the first character in action while you're playing as the second.
That said, the entire concept isn't half as clever or original as developer Cavia seems to think, and for the most part it actually feels underdeveloped. The actual objectives you complete to help your partner are no more imaginative than finding a switch or a computer panel to unlock a door; you can go as far back as the original Doom to get an idea of how many times this kind of puzzle has been done to death. It doesn't help that there's no discernible difference between any of the three characters in terms of their weapons, abilities or even mission objectives - even the second character's route involves finding yet more switches and control panels to operate. Yawn.
You can't help feeling that the game would have been much better and far more interesting if you'd had to use two characters strategically by switching control between the pair more often. Their unique abilities could have been called upon to solve specific puzzles in real-time and work in tandem, instead of playing through a big lump of the game at a time before replaying it with the second character.
At least the first character's success does have a bearing on the second character's progress, beyond being able to enter previously locked doors. Points are awarded based on how quickly you complete the time-sensitive objectives, collect certain items and avoid getting riddled with bullets, which are then carried over to the second character in the form of health. On anything but the easiest difficulty setting, it's vital that you lay enough good groundwork or it's virtually impossible for the second character to get anywhere.
Despite the one-note gameplay, lousy graphics and criminal lack of Xbox Live multiplayer (there are only four split-screen games for up to four players), Winback 2 somehow manages to remain pretty compulsive. There's something very satisfying about popping out from cover to cap a few terrorists in the head then ducking back again before the others can return fire. As simplistic as shooting gallery games like Time Crisis, but just as enjoyable.
WINGS OF WAR
Satisfying arcade fun, but not particularly engaging for long periods of time. SWON and Crimson Skies are better bets
Action - Issue 34 (October 2004) - 6.2/10
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Wings.txtRead Review
At the outset of World War I, aircraft development was still very much in its infancy. Barely ten years had passed since the Wright brothers' inaugural flight and so even high-tech military planes were, for the most part, constructed primarily from wood and canvas. So it comes as something of a shock to discover that the rickety, wooden bi-plane you're saddled with at the outset of Wings of War is able to carry up to 50 rockets and bombs at once. Historical accuracy clearly isn't part of the game's remit. Nope, this is knockabout arcade flying where the ammo's unlimited and upgrades and power packs can be claimed by simply blowing stuff up. Before long you'll be flying the fastest and most heavily armed bi-plane never to have graced the skies during WWI.
Never mind, because Wings of War is all good fun. For at least the first 20 minutes anyway, until the missions start to feel repetitive and the grainy terrain below begins to grate on the eye. There's no System Link/split-screen multiplayer or Xbox Live support either, so you're limited to battling AI foe in single-player. Still, it is only 20 quid, so you can't really complain too vehemently if it's a little unglamorous or rough around the edges, can you?
There are two main gameplay modes on offer: Campaign and Instant Action, which are both exactly that. Campaign mode is how the best planes and weapons for Instant Action are unlocked, so it makes sense to give this option a fair go before launching into the one-against-all or team dogfights of Instant Action.
There are 70 missions in total that take place over the course of 13 sorties in different locations. These missions are packed full of exactly what you might expect; shooting down planes, bombing installations and taking pictures of enemies from above. It's action-packed all the way, with swarms of enemy planes to engage, as well as land- or water-based targets to bomb. The difficulty level can be set at the beginning and auto-saves along the way save any lengthy back-tracking.
Flight controls are simple and intuitive enough; the Left thumbstick controls the plane's pitch and roll, the Right acts as your eyes within the plane to give you a 360û view of the skies. The triggers control acceleration and brake, while the buttons zoom gun sights, fire the machine-guns and drop bombs or rockets. For precision bombing and aerial reconnaissance missions it's possible to call up a magnified under-sight. Dive-bombing is obviously loads more fun though.
There's a narration to the Campaign mode featuring a typically stiff upper-lipped RAF commander, but it's hardly Oscar-winning material. This is very much a budget game: not particularly beautiful (but not wholesale ugly either), and not particularly engaging for long periods of time, but satisfying arcade fun nonetheless.
WITHOUT WARNING
Generic gun game with a 24-style same-story-from-different-perspectives thing going on
FPS - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 7.0/10
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WWarning.txtRead Review
They say to get to know someone you'll need to walk a mile in his shoes. Well, the Odour Eaters better be on hand for Capcom's latest blaster Without Warning, because you'll get the chance to play as six different people, all experiencing the same terrorist takeover of a chemical plant.
You've got all out blasting with the Special Forces soldiers, on-foot action with the cop, and a bit of sneaking and stealthing with the TV reporter and trapped scientist. Your actions while playing as one character have no consequences further down the line, though - it would have been great to have a bit more of a branching storyline. Level design doesn't help either; impassable two-foot-high walls make for a very on-rails experience, offset by the inclusion of many pointless, empty rooms. Weird.
The 24-style clock ominously counts down the minutes between stages, and the game does a decent job of ratcheting up the tension. To hammer home the point that it's all happening at the same time, you'll hear the same dialogue from several different perspectives. There's too much repetition though, and it ends up coming across as a tad lazy.
Although gameplay is fast and frantic, missions are a relentless barrage of respawning enemies, doing their darnedest to stop you obtaining yet another keycard or defusing the umpteenth bomb in a level. Controversially, there's no checkpoint system either; bite the big one and it's a long slog through the same slew of generic enemies. The third-person camera that zooms in and out to accommodate the action is a good idea, but close-up firefights can be confused and annoying affairs.
It's a refreshing premise, but it isn't executed as well as it should be. Approach with caution.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP POOL 2004
Comprehensive pool sim. Benefits immensely from numerous mini-games and Live play
Sports - Issue 26 (February 2004) - 8.3/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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World2004.txtRead Review
Pool has often been regarded as snooker's poorer, slightly seedier little brother. Whereas hanging around smoky snooker halls has a certain East End gangster kudos to it, sticking 50p pieces into pool tables in a smelly youth club definitely does not. Plus the endless variations of regional rules and the unfamiliar US version of 8-Ball, means it may alienate potential potters. Luckily for us, we can now enjoy playing with balls in the comfort of our own living rooms thanks to Manchester-based developer, Blade.
Coming from the same people behind the excellent World Championship Snooker 2003 (Issue 18, 8.4), WC Pool 2004 retains the look and feel of its predecessor, and this is by no means a bad thing. The same basic gameplay mechanics apply, though things have been given a white-gloved polish, as all the balls now boast more impressive reflections than ever. Driven by superior ball physics, they now behave exactly as they would do in real life, meaning subtlety is just as important as power when playing off cushions and the like. They sound very authentic, with differently pitched 'clacks' matching the intensity of impact.
Playing pool requires just as much positional forward thinking as snooker, so use of the handy aiming aid is invaluable and, for the majority of shots, vital. They precisely dictate where the object ball will go once struck, and equally importantly, where the cue ball will go after it's struck the object ball. All other factors that determine the type of shot, like top spin, side, screw-back and pace can all be fine-tuned, and holding down the Left trigger will adjust these within millimetres, making for an absorbing and immersive simulation experience.
There's no tutorial as such to ease into the cuing action, but the inclusion of a Free Table option allows you to hone your technique and not worry about the constraints of a competitive match before the main game. The self-explanatory Pool option lets you compete in 8-Ball and 9-Ball matches, along with the customary Career mode, where you can create a player then lead them from obscurity to World Champion. Several of the top-ranked players are licensed to the game, and while you may not recognise Earl 'The Pearl' Strickland or Francisco Bustamante, you may recall our very own Steve Davis, who lights up the pool world in his own inimitable way.
The rules of pool may be unfathomable to some, but thanks to the handy commentary and intuitive controls, things quickly fall into place. We're more familiar with 8-Ball as Brits, where one player is spots and the other stripes, determined by whoever makes the first pot. Once all a player's balls are sunk, they must pot the black (8-Ball) to win. Alternatively, 9-Ball involves the first player to sink a ball, pot the rest in numerical order, and regardless who has potted the most balls, whoever sinks the 9 wins.
Coupled with the regular game, there's also a multitude of trick shots and mini games to spice up the felty fun. Multiplayer is of course included, though there's no doubles option, a common category of international competition. Compensating for this however, is the inclusion of Xbox Live play, where you can take on fellow hustlers in both
8- and 9-Ball matches. Specific rules can also be effectively customised to suit any regional preferences, so there should be no arguments with the Yanks about where the white should go.
But WC Pool 2004 isn't without its flaws, like the way more emphasis has been placed on ball design rather than character animation, resulting in ugly players (that bear only a remote resemblance to their real-life counterparts) jerkily making their way around the table. But although pool may not be to everyone's taste, you'll not find a more comprehensive billiards sim out there. Ball-busting bliss.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP RUGBY
A great arcade game. A brutal and very playable treat. Stat jugglers steer clear
Sports - Issue 28 (April 2004) - 8.0/10
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WorldRugby.txtRead Review
After a stunning display of national pride on top of a double-decker bus comes the official game of the England rugby team. And just in time for the Six Nations too! Since the World Cup everyone's opted for double PE instead of German when it comes to GCSE options and World Championship Rugby is bound to capitalise on all the current swell of rugby mania. At its core, World Championship Rugby is an excellent arcade replacement for the real thing. It somehow manages to capture the essence of rugby and completely disregard it at the same time. It's the rugby Diet Coke.
World Championship Rugby is the official sequel to the widely respected Jonah Lomu Rugby, something the developer Swordfish Studios is happy to draw comparisons with. And rightly so. WCR has the same beautifully simple take on rugby that strips away complicated rules and procedures, replacing them with an intuitive, instantly playable game. Even a novice with neither the knowledge nor interest in rugby will be able to grasp the fundamentals of the game within a few minutes. Shortly after that, they're guaranteed to start enjoying it as well.
Basically, every move you need to perform can be displayed on screen if you feel you want a nudge in the right direction. Left and Right triggers operate passes, A is for kicks, scoring tries, and tackles (because you'll never do all three at once), and just click the Left stick for a sprint. It's as easy as being floored by an All Black. All that's then left to do is to cover yourself in mud, blood, and sweat, and hit the field for a full-on brawl.
The learning curve, once you've got to grips with the handling, is just on the right side of tough. So, although you may know how to pass and tackle, there's no way the All Blacks will stand idly by cheering you on as Dallaglio and co land try over try past the line. The opposition are a tough, intelligent bunch who swarm around you, forcing you to relinquish the advantage you may have gained, but the controls are responsive, and passing the ball is like dropping a buttered baby, so you should find chinks in their defence after just a few goes.
After scoring a try comes the conversion, and if the simple nature of the gameplay falls flat anywhere, it's here. You simply have to position an arrow in the direction you want to kick and press A, without a power bar in sight. Surely an ounce more depth wouldn't have made the game any less arcadey than it already is. Just because it's fun and simple, doesn't mean it has to be brain dead.
There isn't much jiggery-pokery to be had either, apart from renaming some of the players. You can't custom build your own teams, nor can you alter kit, or play as any team other than internationals. Just about the only outside influence you have is over camera angles but some are just plain stupid. One is so far removed from the pitch you're left feeling like you're watching bacteria multiply really quickly in a petri dish.
World Championship Rugby is a no-frills, man's man of a game. It cuts out the namby-pamby gristle of team stats, league scores, and customisation in favour of pure, bone-crunching, ear-bruising arcade thrills. If you think you can handle rugby that concentrates on the game, and only the game, then you're looking at a brutal and very playable treat, but you have been warned. Stat jugglers steer clear.
More could have been made of the multiplayer options (maybe even four-player options like FIFA 2004) but two just about does the job. The action looks great on screen and thanks to its nice and easy arcade approach, even fans new to the game since the World Cup will be slugging it out in no time at all.
After an initial delve into the rules, it all becomes pretty clear and straightforward. And look at that, we didn't make a single gag about funny-shaped balls.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP SNOOKER 2003
Deeply immersive. A wealth of extras and sprawling career mode
Sports - Issue 18 (July 2003) - 8.4/10
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CM01301E)
World2003.txtRead Review
Most ball sports have had their intricacies recreated in video game form at some time over the years and snooker is certainly no exception. It allows gamers to peer through upside-down spangly virtual glasses, step into well-polished shoes and don bow ties in the privacy of their own homes, without fear of public ridicule.
World Championship Snooker 2003 is the first professional snooker sim on Xbox, but it's actually the third game in the Codies series. Right from the off it's clear that every moment of the game has been finely crafted by the kind of snooker fanatic that stares intently at BBC2, immovable for hours on a Sunday afternoon. Make no mistake, WCS 2003 is the definitive snooker simulator and if you have even a vague interest in smacking coloured balls into pockets you need this game in your life.
In fact, the package is so stuffed to the Crucible with extras that you can not only experience world championship level snooker, but also eight and nine-ball pool, a frameload of mini-games and a Trick Shot mode complete with its very own cuddly John Virgo.
First stop for the virgin virtual cue handler should be the stupendous coaching session, which sees you play a table under the watchful and slightly boss eyes of the mighty Dennis Taylor. Rather than setting out a series of challenges for you to work through, Taylor will actually give you training and advice on the fly as you create your own scenarios through clearing the table.
If you are the kind of player who ignores the instruction manual, skips over training modes and leaves option tweaking for another day, then WCS 2003 has news for you. Just like the real thing, this game is both tough and slow moving. If it's arcade thrills you're looking for then you are probably not of the considered mature disposition to handle this game. Training exercises are mandatory to begin to understand the intricacies of the game and learning how to spin, curl and adjust your angles for optimum snookering opportunities is essential if you are to get past even the first China stage in Career mode. Fools rush in and those who do will find themselves sloping out of the arena with a bruised ego and their cue between their legs.
WCS 2003 is a serious re-creation of the sport and doesn't pull any punches when it comes to playing the main Career mode. One mistake will see your opponent capitalising on the opening and you can frequently find yourself watching incredulously as he works his way around the table, leaving you twiddling your thumbs with rising bile for ten minutes. That's not to say the game is not exciting. In actual fact, the levels of elevation, finger-biting anticipation and deep despair are rarely rivalled in other games to date.
This is one of those titles where the highs are truly high and the lows are joypad-smashingly low. When you are wowing the crowd with shot after shot of pure brilliance, inspiring cheers from the audience and replays set to a glowing commentary from Dennis Taylor and John Virgo, you will feel like this is the best game ever created. Conversely, when you make a silly mistake that you, the commentators and everyone watching knows was your fault and your fault alone, you will hate the game with the kind of passion and voracity usually reserved for animal molesters.
Angle aids can be removed and the game's difficulty is set accordingly. Sadly, the package is let down by the lack of Xbox Live play, which frankly is a crime. Online snooker here would have been fantastic. Another reason for the game just missing out on Elite status is that it lets the side down graphically, too, simply not up to Xbox standards. The visuals are as boring and workmanlike as Stephen Hendry's play. Snooker fans will adore the game but many will simply steer clear.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP SNOOKER 2004
Brilliant for anyone with a remote interest in snooker. Pure tension
Sports - Issue 31 (July 2004) - 8.8/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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CM04201E)
WorldS2004.txtRead Review
The Crucible is swathed in a deathly hush as nearly 1,000 people hold their breaths. Potting balls was a formality in the beginning, but when one ball will seal the championship, it's never been so tough. Will you sink the black and the glory or will you lose your bottle and the title along with it?
World Championship Snooker 2004 certainly isn't for people with nerves of jelly. You'll sigh with relief rather than disappointment that this is much more than the gentle update you expect from most annual sports games. It's a freshly laid baize of graphics, presentation and sound. In fact, the only familiar feature is WCS 2003's (Issue 18, 8.4) trademark cueing control.
Motion capture is the 147 break of this fourth series entry. Players walk around realistically and bridge to cue from each and every point on the table, as long as it's physically possible. Last year's Mr Potato Head faces have gone, replaced with detailed and easily recognisable players from the top 16 and beyond. Only a few of the 128 players still look like identikit photos from Crime Watch, but then again we haven't been to our local snooker hall for a while...
Speaking of snooker halls, there's a mass of potting pavilions. Along with a relaxed and gorgeous-looking pool hall and qualifying room, there are nine real-life, licensed venues including Wembley Lakeside and the Sheffield Crucible.
WCS 2004 is so convincing, you might have to check the TV hasn't switched over to BBC 2. Alan Hughes appears to introduce the players as they walk through the curtain and the ref prowls around the table, eagle-eyed for a dusty cue ball. Dennis Taylor and John Virgo don't miss a beat with their commentary either. You won't want to blunder unless you're a fan of stinging criticism - that's what they're best at. They're also good at 'remembering' and if your safety has been poor or you've been potting one colour like you had a vendetta against it, they'll speak their minds.
Potting can be as easy or as tough as you like. Guide arrows point out the ball paths for novices, but the hardcore will want to turn them off completely. It's a pity you can't glance left or right while leaving the shot setup stationary, but otherwise executing a shot is extremely intuitive. There's also a solid range of opponents to test your skills against. Amateur AI players come from the Chuckle Brothers' School of Snooker while the top 16 professionals are as tough as the real thing.
Admittedly, it's a little frustrating to come up against Ronnie or the Grandmaster in LG Tour mode only for them to score a 147 against you. Unless you practice obsessively, you're unlikely to ever beat the top-flight players.
Even if you do, you won't win a cash prize or a sexy girlfriend, but there are still plenty of incentives to try. The players' lounge is a virtual trophy cabinet, stuffed with treats. Potting multiple reds in one shot, getting a century break or winning tournaments are just a few of the tricks to unlocking videos, secret characters, new balls and even new tables.
With the bonus of Live support, WCS 2004 is the Shangri-la of snooker. It's a game that pulls out all the stops to satisfy the snooker-loopy while offering a style of gameplay that will also satisfy more casual players. If you own a cue, snap it in half and start re-spending your misspent youth on Xbox.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP SNOOKER 2005
Not too many new features, but WCS2005 has enough in its pockets to keep snooker fans going potty for ages
Screenshots - Sports - Issue 41 (April 2005) - 8.2/10
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WCS2005.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




Shhh. Listen to the silence. You might as well get used to it, because if you're planning on pocketing World Championship Snooker 2005, you'll be hearing a lot of, well, not a lot at all. The sound vacuum is occasionally burst by the clack of balls, the mellow murmurings of the commentary team, and the occasional overweight old codger in the back row coughing up a gobbet of lung. Just like real snooker, then.
Thankfully, that's not where the similarities between WCS2005 and the sport itself end. You really couldn't hope for a more accurate Xbox representation of snooker. The player roster has been boosted to over 100, and all the 2005-2006 tournaments and venues like The Crucible are present and correct.
More importantly, WCS2005 plays smoother than a Ronnie O'Sullivan 147. You line up your shots using adjustable aiming arrows and a variety of camera angles, then tweak your power, spin, and cue position. There is a new Tiger Woods-style analogue stick-powered cueing method, but the standard old button press is much more reliable. There's even a brilliant coaching mode, and the spot-on physics engine mean you'll go from ripping the cloth to nailing monster breaks in no time.
Once you've got your tip chalked, you can jump into a quick exhibition match or embark on a full Tour. Winning unlocks bonuses like video clips and classic players, but there's a stack of cool stuff to muck around with from the start. Pool, billiards and some crazy tables add variety, and a selection of John Virgo-style trick shots hone your skills.
As you improve, the strategy of snooker really starts to ooze from the baize. You'll be thinking five or six shots ahead, and casually controlling the position of the cue ball like a waistcoat-wearing wizard. Rather than a plain old sports title, WCS2005 suddenly develops into an extremely addictive and deep puzzle game that values planning, patience and precision over rowdy razzmatazz. Against AI opponents it's compelling - against your mates or across Xbox Live, it's war.
For some, this will sound as appealing as having chalk dust rubbed in their eyes. Aside from a couple of niggles it's hard to find fault with the game, but the snooker-filled silences will definitely only appeal to fans. But that's fine. Playing World Championship Snooker 2005 is a strangely relaxing experience, like being wrapped in kittens and fed tranquillisers, and the spot-on potty action will keep you coming back for more. It may be quiet, but for WCS2005, silence is golden.
WORLD POKER TOUR
A great way of playing online poker for free, but as an offline method of poker practice it's merely okay
US Sports - Issue 50 (XMas 2005) - 6.2/10
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PokerTour.txtRead Review
Poker. It's everywhere at the moment. TV, newspapers, magazines. And why not? Not only is it the king of card games, but there's tons of money to be made playing it against drunk, rich Americans on the internet.
Of course, playing for real money can be intimidating, which is why, on the one hand, World Poker Tour is great, allowing you to play a few rounds of Texas hold 'em across Xbox Live without losing any real pennies. The interface is simple, the graphics are far better than anything you get on real internet Poker sites, and the presentation and options far outstrip anything seen in nearest Xbox rival Bicycle Casino (Issue 42, 3.6).
But if you don't have Live, World Poker Tour is little more than a glorified game of cards against the computer. It does put a lot of effort into catering for the single player, with a full career mode and several real-life players to challenge, but it won't take long for any half-decent player to figure out how to exploit the somewhat basic AI. A nice little package overall though, with plenty of tutorials, and decent enough for getting some practice in before you hit the money tables for real.
WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP POKER 2
Xbox poker raises its game in this ugly but feature-packed gambling sim
US Sports - Issue 55 (May 2006) - 7.2/10
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wcpoker2.txtRead Review
Without the benefit of any kind of official tournament licence, World Championship Poker 2 is forced to do something that other poker games have singularly failed to do until now. It has to innovate. It has to do more than simply present you with a game of cards against the computer. And, much to our surprise, that is indeed exactly what it does.
On the one hand, it's a perfectly decent poker simulator. You can play it on your lonesome, or against other Amarillo Slim wannabes over Live. There are plenty of different rule variations to fiddle with for those adventurous enough to go beyond your basic hold 'em, and, crucially, the computer AI is sharp enough to give you a convincing game. With so many previous poker titles falling down thanks to computer players making ridiculous bets on mediocre hands (last issue's 4.3-scoring World Series of Poker being the most recent culprit), it's something of a relief to play against AI characters that actually know the difference between holding and folding.
World Championship Poker 2 also features a decent range of tutorials, taking you step by step through each of the different poker variations on offer. They're not perfect, and they're a little text-heavy in places, but just having them included instantly makes this a better, more approachable game for poker virgins.
So far so good, then, but it's the single-player career mode where things really begin to take off. Starting out as a rank amateur in your parents' dilapidated basement, you must work your way around the world, entering increasingly higher-profile tournaments. No change there, then. But rather than simply picking your way through a generic list of poker tournaments, never feeling as though you're really getting anywhere, here you get to plough any cash you win straight back into your basement, transforming it from a dirty squat into a veritable palace of cool. As a visual pointer, it's certainly the nicest career-progression system we've seen in a poker game on Xbox.
But it's the unique, interesting twists on the standard poker format that really win it for World Championship Poker 2. Make a bold bluff, or bet on a really strong hand, and you'll be switched to an analogue stick-tweaking mini-game, where the aim is to keep your 'poker face'. Start winning tournaments and you'll even gain experience that can be spent on abilities such as automatically calculating pot odds, or being able to read if your opponents are bluffing or not. These are great, novel little touches that show some real thought has gone into making a decent career mode.
Sadly, the same thing can't be said for the presentation. Graphically, this is the weakest of all the poker games we've played. It looks rubbish, to be frank, and the range of character types and backgrounds isn't much better either. You're better off turning the sound down too, as the grating lift music and speech samples are almost enough to incite violence. Okay, so none of this will matter to you if all you're interested in is the cards, but 30 is a lot to spend on something that looks and sounds this feeble.
Presentational quibbles aside, though, this is a really good game. A bit more polish (and by 'a bit' we mean 'a lot'), a few more career options and some recognisable licensing and this could become an essential purchase for poker fans. Enter EA stage left perhaps?
WORLD RACING
Good technical racer, but a bit sterile. Nirvana for Mercedes fans
Driving - Issue 14 (March 2003) - 6.8/10
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WorldRacing.txtRead Review
Lucky Xbox owners certainly aren't short of racing games to quench their need for speed. All tastes have been catered for, from rallying titles, arcade racers, technical challenges and even biking games. With the exception of Lotus Challenge (Issue 11, 6.5) though, there haven't been any driving games based around one manufacturer's product range. World Racing (previously known as Mercedes Benz World Racing) is here to change that.
If the game was judged on pedigree alone, then you'd have a strong contender for the next Crufts Championship. This title boasts more than 100 different types of Mercedes to unlock and play with - everything from vintage models that look like they've been driven from a museum exhibition to bonkers prototype cars that drive so quickly you expect to engage in a spot of time travel.
To compliment the cars you have some expansive and (above all else) incredibly long tracks to play with. If you choose to, you can go off-course at certain points and drive for miles. The tracks are diverse, encompassing cityscapes, a Mexican rainforest, the typical alpine pass, test tracks and off-road pursuits to name just a few. In fact, there's a bucketload of tracks - almost as many as there are cars, although many of them are variations on existing maps. Don't expect to be overwhelmed by new and exciting landscapes every time you rev your engine.
The map size and the manufacturer's brand are the key selling points to a racer that's already fighting for space in a crowded starting grid, but there are also loads of play modes available. There are more than a dozen different championships to compete in, missions to unlock and accomplish, multiplayer catering for up to four drivers (no Xbox Live though - boo!) in conjunction with the standard single race and free drive game types.
But this is where things start to go rusty, because the level of sophistication shown throughout this title is actually to the detriment of the game itself. For example, the menu system is an overly confusing and convoluted mess of multiple options that stands to hamper and confuse the casual player when they're just trying to get a race together.
After starting a race it quickly becomes apparent that this game takes a different approach to many of the norms of the genre. For a start it's not just winning the race that counts - you also get judged on your skill, discipline and fair play among other criteria. This means that every time you ram a car to gain an advantage you may get marked down, or every time you perform a good handbrake slide (which you'll need to do a lot of) you earn Brownie points for skill. This can be offputting when you're going hell for leather for the finishing line.
Handling is also a formidable task. It's not that the physics are wrong, the cars feel weighty enough and the illusion of track traction is evident, but it can just be plain hard to keep the cars trackside without them bouncing off a barrier or spinning into the distance.
This isn't really an arcade-style driving game that lets you make too many mistakes and get away with it. Although to World Racing's credit, there is an adjuster between Simulator and Arcade that allows for slightly less stringent driving physics - if you can find it hidden in the menu screens.
But the overriding problem with this title is that it just isn't as much fun to play as it should be. It feels more like an interactive advert for Mercedes. You can hardly damage the cars, a few dents on the bumpers and a hint of damage to the bodywork is not what 100 per cent damage should look like. It's obvious that Mercedes didn't want to see their shiny pride and joys look in any way tawdry and this does little to benefit the thrill of driving.
The opponent AI is also a real letdown. The competition is tough enough but the other cars follow the racing line like lemmings on a road trip and rarely show any personality in their very rigid manoeuvres. You also get a very poor choice of cars to start with and in order to get to the better motors you need to invest hours of game-time in successfully completing races.
Graphically, there are no complaints. The cars are highly detailed and the tracks have enough going on in the background to keep you interested. The framerate also nips along adequately but it just doesn't disguise the sterile nature of the game when there are many more exciting racers to chose from.
Dedicated Mercedes fanboys will undoubtedly be polishing their bodywork with glee, but the rest of us will certainly need to think twice before spending the money on this technically competent but rather mundane racing experience.
WORLD RACING 2
A richly detailed, well designed racer that throws it all away with some truly abysmal handling. Polished turd, anyone?
Driving - Issue 48 (November 2005) - 5.3/10
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WorldRacing2.txtRead Review
This isn't half as bad as we thought it was going to be, save for one teeny, tiny point - the handling. Your classic case of Achilles' Heel syndrome, World Racing 2 features some dazzlingly quirky extras such as handy nitrous bursts for jumping over broken bridges, or fully damageable licensed cars, but when the handling goes and screws everything over, no amount of fancy padding can save this.
It's a shame really, especially for a game that sets out to put "the fun back into driving". It does so on so many levels too. Debris stays on the track no matter how many laps you complete, everyday traffic can often cause stonking pile-ups, you can ram through short-cuts, perform death-defying leaps of faith, and smash just about everything on screen to pieces. So why then do the cars have to literally ricochet around the course? It's almost like they left the steering out and made a rubbish version of Burnout by accident. There's so little grace or fire in the belly of the cars, you're practically skating about with bricks for wheels.
This is a great pity. The courses, from Egypt to Hawaii (and just about everywhere in between) are richly detailed and well designed, as are the 40 or so real-world car models, which are all up for a good crunching. The first-person perspective is one of the best we've seen in a racing game too, with true belly-flipping moments of terror when you squeeze between the oncoming traffic. The physics aren't half bad either, with rival cars spinning out and plummeting into buildings or off cliffs. But, what's the point when the driving's so awful? You can wrap a turd in the finest filo pastry, sprinkle it with fresh fruit, icing sugar, and melted Belgian chocolate, but you still wouldn't eat it.
WORLD SERIES OF POKER
Squander your virtual pennies in Activision's cheap and cheerless poker game
US Sports - Issue 54 (April 2006) - 4.3/10
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worldpoker.txtRead Review
Poker: it's the new rock 'n' roll. Everyone's playing it. Everyone! It's not cough sweets and booze Pete Doherty and his band-mates are getting smashed on backstage - it's a pair of Queens and Jack high straights. Don't even think about coming to our party unless you've brought your cards with you. Because poker's hot, hot, hot right now and it's about to hit Xbox in tsunami proportions.
Which means that, as the first and cheapest of this spring's flood of Xbox-based poker titles (Take 2's World Poker Tour (Issue 50, 6.2) having now been put back to April), it's tempting for card fans to simply rush out and buy World Series of Poker. After all, one card game on Xbox is going to play pretty much like another, right?
Well, that's where you're wrong. And in this case, very wrong. Because given that you're paying cold hard cash for something you can just as easily play for free over the internet, it's not unreasonable to ask that Xbox poker games are (a) attractive and well presented, and (b) at least put up a decent fight with believable computer AI.
Unfortunately, World Series of Poker falls flat in both these areas. Presentation-wise it's rudimentary in the extreme, with a mere six poker variations on offer. The graphics are basic, the commentary crude and there isn't even a tutorial mode to help new payers pick up the basics. The only thing really going for World Series of Poker is the control setup, which does a pretty decent job of turning the analogue stick into a wand of money-squandering power.
As for the computer-controlled goons you'll face on a regular basis, we've seen more lucid decision making in a mental institution. For the most part the computer sharks play aggressively, even on stupid hands (situations where AI chumps risk all their money on low ranking cards like a pair of fives are common), to the point where it's impossible to tell if the computer's making a bold bluff, or simply being monumentally thick. It makes playing an intelligent game virtually impossible.
We'd like to say the real-life pros that appear later in the game are better, but we didn't even make it that far, such was the savaging we received from the 'crack-bots' in Career mode. And while we're on the subject, what a lacklustre career mode it is, offering the bare minimum of tournament structures and a hopeless reward system that simply involves collecting commemorative chips and bracelets that can be viewed on a trophy screen afterwards.
You can always play over Live, but as we've said before with poker games, not being able to play for real money takes the shine off things, especially since World Series of Poker doesn't even offer any kind of online leaderboard or ranking system. Don't let the cheap price tag fool you - you're better off folding on this weak effort.
WORMS 3D
Very funny with loads of maps and mad weapons, but no System Link or Live
Turn-based strategy - Issue 22 (November 2003) - 7.3/10
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Worms3D.txtRead Review
"Leave me alone!" This cry rang out around countless living rooms to much merriment when the first Worms game appeared on PC and consoles nearly ten years ago. What started out as a comical, turn-based combat game quickly became a global success and spawned several sequels. Now, the title has evolved from its 2D roots into glorious 3D. By my rudimentary maths, it's gone from two to three so this game should be 50 per cent better, right?
The premise is simple. Control a team of plucky, military-trained earthworms, and use outlandish weapons to obliterate the opposite team. It sounds simple, but the real challenge comes in the art of firing the weapons. It's completely down to the player to correctly judge the aim, trajectory and power of their attacks, taking into account wind direction and speed. It sounds tricky, but soon becomes second nature, and you'll enjoy discovering the characteristics of each weapon. A wide arsenal is at your disposal, from the standard (Bazookas, Grenades, Cluster Bombs), and the devastating (Homing Missiles and Air-Strikes), to the downright ludicrous (Banana Bombs, Sheep, and Exploding Old Ladies). This isn't your standard warfare strategy.
Although the original games gained notoriety as multiplayer titles, at the heart of W3D is a very comprehensive single-player mode. Form a team of worms, and lead them to glory. Start with a handy tutorial, play a quick game against a CPU opponent, and then it's on to Campaign mode with more than 30 maps to conquer.
There's a strong vein of off-the-wall humour, typified by some of the mission names, such as 'Take My Cherry' and 'In Space, No One Can Hear You Clean'. Add to this a huge Challenge mode, where you can unlock weapons, maps, soundbites and secret missions, and you've got a pretty complete one-player game. With random positioning options, customisable levels and weapon distribution, the game provides millions of different permutations, so you should be at this one a fair while.
The gameplay is, like the game itself, a novel yet simple concept. Each level can be played a variety of ways, and most areas are accessible. The 3D environment expands the strategic element, and a fully deformable landscape offers great scope for creating caves, shelter etc.
Multiplayer is usually the forte of the Worms series, but it's here that Worms 3D falls short. Up to four gamers can play, controlling a team each, but all sharing a single pad. This may promote a more social side of things, but it feels antiquated. With no System Link either, just giving the players a pad each would have been something, even in a turn-based game. Also, the PC Worms games were extremely popular online, and Worms 3D has missed a great opportunity. Xbox Live would have been an ideal platform to support cross-continent worm warfare, but alas it wasn't to be.
The camera is the only other main gripe. It's inverted during normal play, but then reverses when zoomed in. This can get really fiddly and frustrating, particularly when you're trying to select your weapon, aim and fire all within a 60-second time limit.
Worms 3D provides a good deal of fun and frolics but fails to be the great multiplayer game it could have been.
WORMS 4: MAYHEM
Stripped down to its component parts, this is the best Worms game yet, but the series is starting to whiff of 'perennial sequelitis'
Screenshots - Strategy - Issue 45 (August 2005) - 8.4/10
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Worms4.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




If you cut a worm in two it most certainly does not grow into new worms. It'll spurt its greyish guts everywhere, convulse a little, ooze out a strange dark-green substance, then die. We know, we tried it when we were kids. Andy Davidson was having much more fun when he was a kid, though. He was creating Worms between sitting exams, just so he could destroy them in more inventive ways. Who'd have thought we'd be sitting here all these years on with Worms 4: Mayhem on our lap, experiencing the closest a current-gen console has ever come to creating the thrill of the original Worms?
Much has changed along the way. If the worms weren't dressing up as Vikings, they were building forts. All the construction and fancy dress stuff was in danger of overshadowing the point - Worms isn't about building, it's about demolition, and that's precisely what you get with Mayhem.
The basic premise of Mayhem is virtually the same as every other Xbox Worms title - tit for tat turn-based violence using household implements and members of the clergy as weaponry. Banana bombs are so passé, darling! Actually, as well as the usual suspects (banana bombs included), the range of weapons on offer is the biggest yet seen in a Worms game. They aren't varieties of similar weapons dressed in different guises either, but distinctly new ways of offing the enemy, such as the inflatable Scouser. Send the moustachioed menace ambling towards a worm and once he makes contact with them, he'll stick to them, inflate, and the whole permed caboodle will ascend high into the clouds. If you need to make sure you know where your enemy is at all times, just ram rusted masonry nails through their tails. They wouldn't be able to move even if there was a five-year-old stood over them with Mum's best cutlery. And if the default weapons aren't your bag, you can always make your own.
The customisation aspect of Worms 4: Mayhem doesn't stop there either - it's fun to create bouncing eyeball bombs packed with explosive pork-chops, but there's so much more tinkering to be done. You can now alter your team's physical appearance, adding hairstyles, hats, glasses, and a veritable whore's handbag of other knick-knacks and accessories. Want to see a pissed-up Scottish Jock worm sporting bunny ears and tarty lippy? Who doesn't? How about 'doing a God' and creating and uploading custom-built maps for all to experience and share? Team 17 has catered for that too. You are now the sole architect of your worms' fates, and you can do with them as you please.
There's still a story element with Mayhem, though - you're taken on a spot of time-travelling with Professor Worm, as he absent-mindedly drops pieces of his craft through various time periods. You have to knock Persian worms into jail using baseball bats, or run the gauntlet of a deadly obstacle course of an evil vizier. It's ideal for breaking up the endless procession of turn-based wormicide - as good as that happens to be, we've seen it all so many times before.
Worms 4 might be like your standard EA-style sports update - fundamentally the same as the previous incarnation, just sporting new features, such as curly turd-bombs dropped from helicopters. But strip away the gameplay and you'll find some natty new touches that have been punched into place, namely with the terrain. It now sustains a considerable amount of damage depending on what surface is struck. Whole buildings have to be levelled in some missions, with construction worker worms crushed under mounds of falling debris, or suddenly finding themselves flapping in thin air before falling to earth with a squelch. Not all environments crumble though. Inexplicably, whereas some blocks collapse with those around them, we often saw the dust clear to reveal a sole, surviving worm stood smugly waving on one of those weird, hovering pieces of scenery that remain suspended when all about it is rubble.
It pays to plant the TNT too, as the destruction of certain areas and walls reveal Aladdin's caves of treasures and treats. Bizarre worms also lurk in areas of the story modes too. Find these easter eggs during a mission and they'll reward you with an abundance of gold coins. These can then be taken to the shop to buy various odds and sods with which to kit out your team.
Extra outfits, voices, and game styles can be bought at the shop, but most importantly for the discerning worm, there are ingenious weapons to be added to your arsenal. We recommend the sniper rifle or new poison arrow, both of which are precise in their purpose and far more effective at killing than, say, a 200 pound comedy cow.
At its core, Mayhem is a leaner, less confusing entry to the Worms universe than Forts Under Siege, returning the series to a time when worm-killing was simple and death came in the form of an exploding sheep. With Live as standard these days, it's what Worms 3D should have been a couple of years ago. It's just a shame it's taken so long to get here.
Worms 4 is far from a revelation for the Worms games, and it's far from anything remotely resembling groundbreaking, but by wisely shrugging off much of the baggage that has tied the series down for so long, out of the mayhem comes something bordering on compulsive wet weekend gaming. Worms of the world, go grab yourselves a pint of mud, you've done yourselves proud.
WORMS FORTS: UNDER SIEGE
More worms, more strategy, more fun! Real world locations and periods in history make it even better. Live, too!
Turn-based strategy - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 8.4/10
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WormsForts.txtRead Review
Ringworms, roundworms, tapeworms and hookworms... fish 'em out and fire 'em up because Team 17's wriggling warmongering classic is back. A call to arms for everything without a spine, Forts: Under Siege is Worms 3D (Issue 22, 7.3) but with a more devious repertoire, a brand new strategic angle, and 50-stone canaries.
As you have no doubt guessed from the title, this is Worms with fortifications. Where the aim of the game was once to survive the longest, you're now required to beat back the enemy and indulge in a little Barrett Homes building at the same time. Think of it as Worms gone Populous. There's even wrath of god weapons this time too.
By expanding your encampment into enemy territory and building on map hot spots known as Victory Locations, you earn bigger building structures. These can then be mounted with vast weapons capable of obliterating an enemy in one fell swoop. Developing the best buildings in the best place is obviously the key to success, as is firing off the excellent Rhino weapon now and again. The more Victory Locations you secure, the greater the range of building until, if you're lucky, you'll have hospitals and weapons factories spewing out worms and ammo faster than you can use them.
If you think the inclusion of forts is a gimmick you're sorely mistaken. It's a dynamic move that adds a layer of depth and intricacy to gameplay that feels just a little bit naughty. You know Worms should be nothing more than tit-for-tat retaliation, but with brains it's so much better.
Then of course, there's the Xbox Live play. Our collective gasps of shock when we all found out Worms 3D would not be playable online were obviously heard. You can play against your friends, you can communicate tactics and taunts, and you can undertake vast campaigns against intelligent opponents who'll do everything to employ craftier tactics than you. To say Live play adds life to this title is an understatement.
But, surprisingly, the biggest shock to the system is the wealth of new weapons. Want to trundle around with a massive explosive canary held above your head? Of course you do. What about firing off a giant hippo with dynamite strapped to its back? Be our guest. How about smothering your enemy in flaming hot Chilli Con Carnage? Go grab a spoon and do your worst.
These weapons, plus around 50 others (look out for the fridge bomb which opens up to scatter its explosive contents everywhere) are complemented by the environments this time too. Not to mention the destruction you can rain down on them... Real-world locations have replaced the trippy, otherworldly arenas of Worms 3D and lend themselves brilliantly to the slimy retelling of history's finest moments. Whether you're rescuing Helen of Troy or setting sail across the seven seas only to be attacked by pirate worms, it makes for a far more engrossing experience than any alien worm attack ever did.
It's not without its faults though. Time limits on some levels end up being the biggest opponent and where you'd like to employ flanking manoeuvres and explore your surroundings, you're forced to do otherwise. Slight scenery glitches see the camera sometimes swallowed up by the occasional wall, and the failure-to-success ratio will infuriate some players. But, if you still consider turn-based games a valid concept, and don't mind that you find enjoyment in such a simple game (albeit with a god-sim twist), you'll be in your element. Forts is probably not for everyone, but those of us with hearts as squishy as the loveable mud-chewers themselves will be in seventh heaven.
WRATH UNLEASHED
Nice idea but too basic and uninspiring to deliver. Potentially fun at first, but the fighting is repetitive
Turn-based strategy - Issue 26 (February 2004) - 5.0/10
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Wrath.txtRead Review
It reads like a fantasy fan's wet dream. A lateral, turn-based video game set in disturbingly dark lands featuring grumbling, hideous, mythological superbeings, all vying for universal supremacy and dabbling in unworldly magic and gentlemanly bouts of fisticuffs. Ideal, then, if your concept of fun involves a friendly game of chess with your brainiest chum and an in-depth analysis of Sauron's failed invasion of the city of Gondor in The Lord of the Rings.
For those of you who like your D&D-style shenanigans, Wrath Unleashed is best described as part tactical board game, part one-on-one fighter. Ally with an elemental force, take command of a motley bunch of genies, ogres, centaurs and unicorns etc, and do battle on a simple 3D battlefield-cum-board. It's as simple as that. You move your living pieces, engaging in punch-outs whenever two pieces vie for the same 'square'. Of course, the bigger picture demands the completion of specific aims, such as securing citadels and temples, all of which come with the extra bonus of rewarding your armies extra magic.
It doesn't end there, though. There are other little things to consider. For example, difficult terrain and minor disasters are liable to throw a spanner in the works, while certain powerful individuals can help turn the tide of a campaign by casting cheeky spells. Yep, thanks to demi-god leaders, not only can you change the shape of the land, but execute unfortunates with a click of the fingers. Surely that's just cheating?
Whilst the turn-based wargaming is no better or worse than playing draughts, chess or Monopoly (read that as you will), the 3D fighting action feels like something left over from the Dreamcast. Essentially, each monstrous oddity has several attacks, which makes for some of the most basic beat 'em up frolics since Ken and Ryu were trading blows in kindergarten. Soul Calibur II (Issue 21, 9.1) it ain't. While the strategic advancement of 'troops' has its rare moments (especially in multiplayer), the fun is marred by the fact that every major attempt to steal ground culminates in turgid punch-ups of the dullest kind. You'll groan, you'll cry, then you'll say "Screw this for a laugh" and hike it back to your local games store to trade it in for something more engaging. Like a 3D trump cards simulator. Possibly.
WRECKLESS
Awesome demo of what Xbox can do, but not enough game in it
Driving - Issue 2 (April 2002) - 7.5/10
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Wreckless.txtRead Review
Hong Kong needs your help! An evil Yakuza crime boss is bringing his dirty trade to the city's colourful streets, and there's only one way you can stop him - by getting in a fast car and smashing the crap out of everything! No subtlety here, it's just all-out, high-speed, big-bang blockbuster carnage, with you at the controls of a bunch of souped-up autos carrying a licence to wreck.
As you'll know if you've had a look at this issue's Game Disc, Wreckless: The Yakuza Missions looks absolutely incredible. Abso-freaking-lutely in-freaking-credible, to be freaking honest. We've tried our best to capture its amazing look in our screenshots but, while some of them may look great, it's only when you see the graphics in motion that they really look special.
The city in which the whole game is set (a semi-accurate, stylised Hong Kong) is enormous and completely believable. It's made up of individual districts, massive, solid buildings, tiny market stalls, vehicles and pedestrians going about their business.
Everything is bathed in lighting of a kind you've never seen before. The glare of the sun bouncing off shop windows, casting shadows across the streets and neon signs buzzing luminous colours onto everything in their vicinity give the whole game world a thumpingly solid feel. The car you drive looks amazing as well, and even reflects the scenery in its bodywork, as in Project Gotham Racing (Issue 01, 8.9).
Plus you can use said car to smash the crap out of everything in the aforementioned city, with bits and pieces of everything shattering, bouncing and exploding all over the shop in spectacular, ludicrously colourful style.
Special effects by the dozen are then smeared on top of the entire game to give it a televisual quality - things in the distance appearing out of focus, heat haze from your engines causing the scenery to shimmer, virtual views wobbling to give a hand-held camera feel.
Most of these effects have been seen on their own in games before, each time standing out as a title's defining visual element. Wreckless does everything at once, and it makes you sit up and notice just how much of a step forward from other consoles Xbox is making, in terms of raw processing power.
But why go on about the graphics so much before talking about the actual game itself? Because the way Wreckless looks and the way its virtually living city moves as you plough through it, means that the visuals practically are the game.
There are two storylines to follow, one featuring two dizzy female cops and the other featuring two dizzy male spies. Each path is made up of a bunch of missions involving defeating the evil Yakuza gangsters.
Missions come in two forms - racing around the streets smashing up Yakuza cars and scenery, or guiding your vehicle around a tricky series of tunnels, pathways and ledges, much like a platform game.
And there's really not much more depth to it than that. The storylines are nonsense, with cut-scenes establishing the plot via the medium of gibberish scripts and rubbish jokes. Even the mission explanations themselves are worthless.
"Somebody's stolen something and is planning to do something-or-other with it! Stop them before they get to somewhere-or-other or something will happen!" Yeah, whatever. In other words: "Smash the crap out of everything with a red mark around it before the timer runs out."
The thing is, deep, movie-like plots and revolutionary gameplay ideas aren't always necessary. As long as something's fun, we're happy. Unfortunately though, quite a few of Wreckless's 20 relatively short missions fall on the wrong side of fun. They end up on the side marked 'frustrating', in fact...
Negotiating an underground passage full of twisting ledges and moving platforms in a heavy sports car is just plain fiddly, and when there's a great big puddle of magic water waiting to send you back to the start of the section if you mess up, it just gets annoying. You'll find yourself simply battling through just for the satisfaction of never having to play the level ever again.
There are other things that test your ability to remain calm. After eventually working your way to the top of a massive construction site, dodging ram-happy Yakuza cars on the way up, you've only got a few seconds to make it across a little bridge to the next section.
You carefully edge your car forwards, looking around for more danger. And then you fall through a hole you couldn't see because what you were actually supposed to do was go across the bridge quickly, thus falling all the way to the bottom of the building only to watch the timer tick helplessly to zero. Will you be able to stop yourself throwing your brand new Xbox controller at the floor?
Unfortunately, these frustrating bits feel unnecessary - as if the game wasn't completely finished and someone didn't have the time to tidy things up properly.
So the platform bits don't really work too well. A shame, but is it really the end of the world? Thankfully not. Wreckless's other component - speeding around smashing the heck out of everything - is tremendously good entertainment, especially when it looks and feels as great as it does here.
Throwing the vehicles around the city, ploughing through scenery, sending civilians scattering for their virtual lives, setting off chains of explosions and causing massive pile-ups is fun. Brilliant fun, actually.
All the vehicles are great in their own way, and trying to track down the hidden bonus-mobiles is very satisfying. Finishing the piffling 20 missions isn't much of a challenge at all, providing you can be bothered to battle through the frustrating sections.
But going back into the city in a new-found tank and causing mass destruction before watching it all again in the utterly astounding replay mode is something that a sane person can never tire of.
And that's basically what Wreckless is - a beautiful playground in which to indulge your action movie fantasies. It's rather like a high-tech version of ramming toy cars through home-made cereal-box buildings off cardboard ramps.
A lack of features makes it feel quite empty. There's no 'free roam' mode, no way of watching replays in slow-motion, no way of placing scenery and cameras where you want them and no way of turning the timer off.
But the overall look and feel of Wreckless: The Yakuza Missions make it the best thing for showing off the fact that, with an Xbox under your telly, you own the most powerful console available to man.
WWE RAW
Completely out-of-date roster, lack of modes, sluggish gameplay
Sports - Issue 8 (October 2002) - 5.3/10
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WWERaw.txtRead Review
Vince MacMahon's World Wrestling Entertainment (formerly Federation) began its domination of the sport in the mid-80s, when it started to shift the emphasis from violence and aggression towards fun and freedom of expression. Think The Jerry Springer Show... but in tights. But play WWE Raw for any length of time and you'll realise that the fun's starting to fade, and that WWE is taking the whole experience far too seriously.
Everything in the game certainly looks and sounds authentic. Chris Jericho's ring entrance is just one example of the realistic graphics and excellent motion capture. Undertaker also looks great as he drives his Harley down the ramp to the grinding riffs of Limp Bizkit's Rollin'.
Unfortunately, there is an equal number of details that will annoy the hell out of hardened wrestling fans. Not least the completely out-of-date roster. The appearance of ex-stars like Haku and K-Kwik (and a certain beer-drinking baldy redneck with the initials SCSA) just compound the absence of current main-eventers like RVD and Booker T.
A distinct lack of freedom also limits the action. If you played No Mercy on Nintendo 64 and enjoyed running away, performing high-flying and double-team moves, climbing a cage, beating up the referee and even fighting backstage, you'll feel restricted here. An interference system where random wrestlers interrupt your match is a good idea but it happens too often and without any apparent motivating factor.
Everything moves so slowly and the steep difficulty curve - especially when doing reversals - drains the excitement and tension from each match. It's a shame because the match-winning system in WWE Raw is a good 'un. Instead of an energy bar, each wrestler has a momentum meter that grows as they perform impressive moves or taunt their opponent. This approach means you can never be over confident - one mistake can swing the momentum against you.
WWE Raw's create-a-wrestler mode pales in comparison to the detail and diversity of Legends Of Wrestling (Issue 05, 6.0). Although the menu is more user-friendly, you can't design logos and the choice of clothing designs is limited, although extra items of kit can be earned by punching them off opponents in bouts.
Realistic graphics aren't enough to save WWE Raw from its other faults and grappling fans will get much more out Legends Of Wrestling. Let's just hope that the inevitable WWE Raw 2 learns from and improves on its sadly limp predecessor.
WWE RAW 2: RUTHLESS AGGRESSION
Graphically great, ace multiplayer season mode, but sluggish gameplay
Sports - Issue 22 (November 2003) - 7.3/10
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WWERaw2.txtRead Review
Why must people put up with ridicule for liking something? Vanessa suffers every day for her love of hideous metal tracks and furry animals. Likewise, my wrestling fervour is another source of amusement for the office's second-rate football supporters.
Raw 2 tries hard to move beyond the usual formula of a few different match types and a large superstar roster. The first ever multiplayer season mode allows you and three friends to compete across Raw, Smackdown!, and all the pay-per-view events in a season.
Between matches, you can set your superstar wrestler some extra-curricular activities. These include attacking another player or NPC in their locker room, stealing one of their treasured possessions, or forming an alliance with them. There are around 20 actions in total. It's a gripping way of improving your success rating without always having to win matches. When all four players are causing trouble behind the scenes, it's a lot of fun. The only real downside to all this mayhem is the vast amount of menus to wade through.
Competing in the matches can be a bit of a chore, too. Expect the same sluggish movement and occasionally erratic collision detection as last year's Raw. On the plus side, it's much easier to reverse grapples and execute those spectacular finishers. We were also impressed that you hardly ever see the wrestlers' heads and limbs passing through their bodies.
The game physics are a lot better, too. You can execute any special move on top of the Hell in a Cell and both players will go crashing through to the mat below. You can climb up the ladder and jump outside the ring onto another superstar as well. Unfortunately, the table matches let the realism leak out like soup in an envelope. You can't seem to make your opponent lie prone on the table, and trying to grapple them upright here is nearly impossible.
That's disappointing, but you certainly won't be despondent with the create-a-wrestler mode. It's the most comprehensive character builder to date, especially when it comes to designing entrances, taunts and moves. I certainly had bags of entertainment making my own character and taking him through Season mode. It's going to be even more fun to build a wrestler of Phil and smash his face in.
Raw 2 is by no means perfect, but there's enough slapstick violence and WWE authenticity to entice most grapple fans. On the flip side, those who prefer pure beat 'em ups should stay well away from the canvas.
WWE WRESTLEMANIA 21
Much better than the Raw games. Good selection of wrestlers and match types, plus decent voiceovers, but suspect collision detection
Screenshots - Sport - Issue 42 (May 2005) - 7.3/10 - Xbox Live features **
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WWE21.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




The good news first: WrestleMania 21 is the best WWE game on Xbox. Definitely. Okay, so it's one of only three WWE games admittedly, and it's fair to say the first two - Raw 1 and 2 - were absolutely atrocious. Well, okay, Raw 2 (Issue 22, 7.3) was good at the time, but it's aged really badly.
What WrestleMania 21 isn't, however, is the finished article. At least, not yet. New development team Studio Gigante may have had a good crack at bringing a credible wrestling game to Xbox, but it's clear there's still some way to go before we get anything to rival PS2's excellent Smackdown series.
On the plus side, there are plenty of areas where WrestleMania 21 really shines. In the graphics department for instance, this boasts some of the most realistic wrestlers we've ever seen in a squared circle game. Not only that, they all display masses of utterly convincing animation, along with some of the most painful-looking explosions of blood and sweat this side of a historical war movie.
There's also a pleasingly comprehensive list of match types to plough through. Standard one-on-one and tag matches, cage matches, hell-in-a-cell, ladder, table and chair scraps, plus the ever-popular Royal Rumble and bra and panties events. Okay, casket and buried alive matches still aren't in yet, but surely that's just a matter of waiting until WrestleMania 22, right?
As for the meat of the single-player game, you're talking Career mode, and it's here that WrestleMania 21 goes back to basics. Create your own wrestler and take them to the top of the WWE. Simple. But rather than bewildering you with the unfocused, open-ended approach of Raw 2, WrestleMania 21 unfolds through animated cutscenes, each one voiced by the actual superstars involved. Admittedly the plot-driven nature means it gets a bit linear on occasion, but there's no denying Career mode makes you feel like you're part of the weekly Smackdown and Raw shows.
Where WrestleMania 21 starts to struggle, however, is in the ring. Never a good sign given this is where the bulk of the action is supposed to take place. Control-wise, WrestleMania uses the face buttons for strikes and grapples and the shoulder buttons for reversals, the trick being that a correctly timed reversal can block any other move in the game. Which is fine, if you have the patience to learn the often absurdly quick timings needed for reversals, but thanks to the frequently sketchy collision detection that's much easier said than done. The moves are easy enough to pull off when you're on your own, but in an actual fight things can become worryingly unresponsive, especially when your opponent continually rains the smackdown on you and refuses to let you pick yourself up.
It's not bad enough to be unplayable, but the fact remains: the WrestleMania series needs plenty more polish if it's to become anywhere near as smooth and responsive as, say, DOA Ultimate's.
But the real letdown with the current incarnation is all the silly little errors that stink up WrestleMania 21 like sweaty jockstraps in Triple H's laundry basket. Inconsistencies such as the out-of-date player roster (why are Jazz and Nidia still there, yet characters like Heidenreich, William Regal and Torrie Wilson aren't), the fact that only four wrestlers are ever allowed on screen at once (why not six, or eight?), and that the list of unlockable legends is limited to say the least (no Hulk Hogan!). As big WWE fans, we'd be mightily disappointed if it wasn't for the half-decent Live mode.
XBOX MUSIC MIXER
Music player and karaoke for your Xbox! 20,000 downloadable tunes and fun for all the family!
Party - Issue 25 (January 2004) - 7.0/10
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XboxMusic.txtRead Review
Karaoke. The pastime of Japanese businessmen and girls on the razz, it's normally reserved for the relative anonymity of bars. But all that's about to change with Xbox Music Mixer, bringing shame and derision to friends and family in the comfort of your own living room.
At the heart of the game is the Music Player. Coming complete with 45 tracks to listen to, you can import tunes from CD and add these in too. And because Xbox Music Mixer is fully PC-compatible, masterly musicians can transfer MP3s, WMAs and JPEGs over from a home computer using the (freely downloadable, and simple to use) Music Mixer PC Tool. So kick back and Let The Music Play.
Set interactive Visualizers to your various soundtracks to get the right sort of look to accompany your sounds. A 3D version shows various animated characters - the most comical of these is a Dancing Queen who looks like she's being electrocuted. These can be manipulated on screen to change their dance style, clothing and backgrounds. The regular 2D psychedelic backgrounds can also be changed to look even more mind-bendingly weird. At the end of the day though, it's just the same repetitive graphics playing over and over again, and no amount of messing around makes this any more interesting.
However, Take A Chance on the karaoke option, and you'll discover the real Heart And Soul of the title. Fifteen tracks are already present, including sing-a-long faves I Will Survive, Love Shack and YMCA. Words (blue for boys, pink for girls) appear on screen, preceded by some rather obvious statements: 'Papa Don't Preach, sung in the style of Madonna.' You don't say. Pop in one of your own CDs, then Bring It All Back as you import them onto the player. A neat option lets you strip the vocals from any track, thus letting you sing along unaided (which is not necessarily a good thing) to your favourite songs. You'll need the inlay cards though, because unfortunately the lyrics won't magically appear on screen.
Additional features like the Rave mode (create a custom soundtrack/playlist and set it to pre-recorded video) do little to enhance things, especially when 'Rave sample 1' kicks off with an indie track. A photo viewer is also present, whereby digital photos can be uploaded and set to music, or, if you really want to bore the pants off your mates, add a running commentary.
Xbox Music Mixer obviously won't appeal to everyone, and although the microphone
isn't the best (any further than two inches from your mouth and it doesn't work), there is the option to download further tracks via Xbox Live from a choice of more than 20,000 tunes. However, if it's pure party entertainment you're after, you won't do any better than this. My girlfriend was dancing round in front the telly after only five minutes. Me? I Blame It On The Boogie.
XGRA
Futuristic bike-racing game. Fast, but the weapons system is clumsy
Racing - Issue 21 (October 2003) - 6.5/10
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XGRA.txtRead Review
So what do you get if you take the excellent light-cycles from the classic Disney movie
Tron and mix it with the stomach-churning maps of WipEout? The answer is XGRA - a game that's been saddled with such a clumsy name that it doesn't so much roll off the tongue as crawl clumsily out of the mouth.
Think Quantum Redshift (Issue 09, 8.0) without quite so much graphical splendour, level variation and general coolness. In fact, think of any futuristic racer you've ever played and you'll get a taste of the brew that XGRA is serving up. Except Pulse Racer (Issue 15, 1.9) - don't think about that at all, please. Official Xbox Magazine will not be held accountable for any homicidal tendencies...
The silly name is actually short for Extreme G Racing Association - which has been the cornerstone for a series of games that's had many an incarnation over a number of different consoles before finally getting a place on the Xbox starting grid. It's got all the necessary ingredients, breakneck speeds, multiple weapons, tracks that make your guts feel like they're on a Blackpool big dipper and the obligatory kick-ass dance soundtrack to reinforce the feeling that yes, you really are playing in the future. But in this case, it doesn't all add up to a good game.
For a start, it's difficult to get any real momentum going because you'll often be too busy ricocheting from side to side like a psychotic pinball on wheels. Airbrakes are in effect, and you can even manage braking severity through a workshop option, but the handling is still too light. There'd probably be more control if the vehicle was a ship rather than a bike, giving you more opportunity to bank instead of brake, but that's not the case.
Then there's the weaponry - it's not a simple case of collecting weapon-specific
power-ups. Instead you have to collect a series of orbs that then increase what weapons you can use - so without looking out for these power-ups you're not going to be getting any righteous firepower... not very useful when trying to navigate an unpredictable course at warp factor nine.
To its credit, XGRA does try hard. It generally looks good, especially when you're tearing through a tunnel while following a colourful array of light trails from opponents' bikes. There's certainly enough mission variety to keep the action interesting too, as your success is not always based on coming first, but rather on fulfilling contracts - for example, beating a certain opponent or killing a set number of your fellow racers.
But repeatedly bouncing off walls whilst negotiating snaking tracks that make even Graham Norton look straight will only take you so far and, as a result, XGRA offers a diversion rather than a compulsion. One that perhaps will only be truly appreciated by the lightspeed freaks out there.
XIII
Unique, stylish and captivating. You can't afford to miss this superb FPS
First-person shooter - Issue 23 (December 2003) - 9.0/10 - Xbox Live features ***
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XIII.txtRead Review
Prepare for a reality check. XIII is about to suck you into another world completely - that much-underrated sphere of the imagination. It's a risky business, but one that raises this first-person shooter off the scale. As you'll soon discover, the freshness extends far beyond the beautiful cel-shaded graphics.
Cel-shading is rarely used, particularly in this genre, but there's a good reason for using it in XIII. Everything is tied into this distinctive look, from the character's origins (a Belgian graphic novel) to his special 'sixth-sense' abilities.
Although he's an amnesiac at the start of the game, it isn't long before the oddly named XIII discovers the skills that once made him the ultimate assassin. Simply by standing still for a few moments, he can start to sense the enemies around him. You not only hear the bad guys approaching, but actually see the tapping of their footsteps in the form of on-screen onomatopoeia, making it possible to anticipate their movements even when you can't see them. Try lurking around a corner, then jumping out behind your enemy as he passes by. You can either take him hostage, thwack him with a blunt object or slip by unnoticed. Stealth or slaughter, it's completely up to you.
Also tied into the sixth sense are the pop-up boxes that let you see events taking place in other parts of the level. This varies between watching enemies bump off civilians to friends having important conversations.
Pop-up boxes also give you a better view when throwing grenades. Chuck one over a high wall and you can see if your shrapnel attack has been successful. That's not to mention all the pop-up animations for spectacularly gory.
Innovations like this make for great gameplay and even better storytelling - XIII has appealing characters and a gripping plot. Waking up on a beach at the start of the game, Steve Rowland - aka XIII - is accused of assassinating the President of the United States. His friend and mentor General Carrington has been imprisoned in the Arctic wastelands and a guild of conspirators known as the XX are after their heads.
It sounds straightforward enough, but as the game progresses, you start to doubt whether Stevie-boy is a real American hero after all. Remarkably, it's only the acting of David Duchovny (of X-Files fame) that lets the character down. It's lucky that XIII is the strong, silent type because his dialogue is flat and uninspired. With that exception, the voice acting is superb, especially the defiant Major Jones who has bad attitude in spades.
And spades are just one of many household items you can use as a weapon. One of the best scenarios in the game is where XIII is institutionalised in a high-security lockup. The wardens try to batter you in the showers, but you can grab bottles and broomsticks and teach them the real meaning of prison brutality.
Ashtrays, chairs, pieces of glass and loads more items can be wielded to deadly effect. Obviously, there are plenty of real weapons to use as well. GoldenEye fans will be overjoyed that XIII's arsenal is almost identical, but there are two important differences. All firearms have a secondary fire mode and come accompanied with comical onomatopoeia like "Blam!" or "Baoom!!" Sadly, a major flaw with the multiplayer game is that the weapon set for each level is pre-configured and can't be changed. This is especially disappointing when one of the major appeals of the story mode is the huge arsenal and high-tech gadgets.
One of the best gadgets available in story mode is the grappling hook. This device can be attached to certain points in the level and comes with a remote control to ascend and descend. Hanging from the rope with one hand, you can whip out a rifle and rain lead on your foe below. A feature we've never seen in an FPS before is your ability to take hostages. Sneak up behind any daydreaming villain and grab them around the throat. You can then parade around and some enemies won't attack. Brilliantly, this is never mandatory for completing a mission. You're just as free to unholster your gun and start blazing away with the protection of a human shield. Room to do things your own way transforms XIII from a linear experience into a single-player story with bags of replay value.
While the multiplayer levels are compact, there are enough hidden routes, crawlspaces, balconies and ramps to keep things interesting. Along with Deathmatch, Team Deathmatch and Capture the Flag, there's also a romping Sabotage mode. Similar to the multiplayer missions in Return to Castle Wolfenstein, one team must defend three strategic points while the other team have to destroy them. We can see the fast and frenetic gunplay being a welcome addition to Xbox Live, especially with eight players on the go. Failing that, you can always rely on the sophisticated AI bots for opposition. Downloadable content including new multiplayer maps are promises worth holding onto.
Few FPSs on Xbox deliver the single-player goods as well as XIII. Gripping story, appealing characters and unique melee weapons are all united perfectly by a graphical appeal and some astute gameplay innovations. You don't need a sixth sense to tell that Christmas 2003 just got a whole lot bigger.
X-MEN: THE NEXT DIMENSION
Awkward controls, sluggish pace and uninspiring visuals
Beat 'em up - Issue 12 (January 2003) - 5.0/10
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Xmen.txtRead Review
The beat-'em-up is one of the oldest video game genres there is. We can deduce two things from this; firstly, gamers like beat-'em-ups. Secondly, because it's been around so long, the humble beat-'em-up has had more time than most to evolve. It's been refined and honed into the kind of slick, lightning-fast playable scrappers typified by the Dreamcast's Soul Calibur and Xbox favourite Dead or Alive 3 (Issue 01, 8.5).
The X-Men are great characters to put in a beat-'em-up, as well. They're distinctive, and have loads of outlandish special moves that perfectly suit the bombastic nature of a damn good bundle. Which is probably why Capcom put a load of them in the Marvel vs. Capcom series to great effect.
In X-Men: Next Dimension, though, the heroic mutants get the whole game to themselves. And unlike in the Capcom title, they're fleshed out into 3D. With 25 characters from the comic series, there are a lot of interesting moves for fans to find, too. Famous sorts like Wolverine and Gambit mix it up with less well-known characters like Toad and Nightcrawler. Fans of the comics will be interested to see how their favourite mutants shape up in the game, and the fact that there are quite a few is a definite plus point. Their moves are well-chosen and reflect the characters well.
The combat itself takes its inspiration from many different beat-'em-ups. Some arenas are reminiscent of Soul Calibur, with limited room encouraging thoughtful use of space. Others allow the player to knock their opponent out of the arena, with the action continuing after an ungainly fall to a lower part of the level, as in Dead Or Alive 3.
This being the X-Men, though, you also get a few pyrotechnics - projectile attacks are common, exaggerated effects abound, and large hit counts are totted up and congratulated, as in the Marvel vs. Capcom series. The ideas are all solid, tried and tested in some of the greatest beat-'em-ups ever made.
Good ideas need to be executed very well to reach their full potential, however,
and that's sadly not the case with X-Men: Next Dimension. In fact, the fighting system's actually a bit sloppy in some ways. The characters feel slow and unresponsive to your controller input, effectively ruining the game from the off; the amount of time it takes for them to respond to your instructions is simply too long, making it feel like you're playing through an interpreter at times. There's none of the glorious fluidity that you get in Dead Or Alive 3, none of the swift grace that beat-'em-up fans expect, just awkward, clunky movement.
Similarly damaging to the game's prospects is the complete lack of feeling of contact when you land a blow upon your opponent. What's the point of controlling the super-powerful Juggernaut, or the blade-wielding Wolverine, if whatever moves you perform don't convince you that you're inflicting any damage whatsoever?
Not only does it not feel like you're hitting anyone, but the action's pretty glitchy on occasion, too. At one point, my character was behind his opponent, who was facing away from me - yet his forward-facing attacks still registered on me. That's a bit poor, isn't it?
As if a dodgy fighting engine wasn't bad enough, X-Men: Next Dimension features some poor graphics. In places, they're little better than something you'd expect to see on a PSone game circa 1997 - only a slightly higher resolution might convince you this isn't a re-issue from Sony's first console. Scant detail, bland textures and clunky animation all conspire to make this look a bit poor when placed next to other Xbox games. Some arenas are much better than others, but like it or not, this is going up against DOA3 - and despite the nice moments, it looks and feels ancient next to Tecmo's stunner.
One other annoyance is the fact that you can only walk about the arenas Soul Calibur-style by using the analogue stick, but then you can't jump. If you use the D-pad, you can jump, but not walk around properly - only sidestep. So you can't even use all the moves from the D-pad or thumbstick, you need to switch between the two.
X-Men: Next Dimension isn't the worst beat-'em-up we've ever played, and there are some nice X-Men moments for fans, but the fighting action just isn't as slick or satisfyingly intricate as much of the competition.
X-MEN 2: WOLVERINE'S REVENGE
Entertaining action title. Plenty of challenge and lots of levels
Action - Issue 17 (June 2003) - 7.4/10
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AV00801E)
Xmen2.txtRead Review
Retractable, foot-long Adamantium claws shooting from your knuckles is a cool trick. With half the OXM team currently dosed up on antibiotics, a nifty self-healing ability could also come in handy. Unbreakable bones? Well go on then, if you insist. But we'll pass on the enhanced senses, thanks - nobody really wants to smell Ben's fear.
And so the shopping list of special abilities introduces another superhero to Xbox. After a cameo appearance in sluggish beat 'em up X-Men: The Next Dimension (Issue 12, 5.0), Wolverine - the character that resembles a sordid dalliance between a hairy trucker and Freddie Krueger - grabs centre stage in his first solo Xbox outing, X-Men 2: Wolverine's Revenge.
But rather than opting for the standard superhero beat 'em up shenanigans found in the likes of the previous X-Men title, Wolverine's Revenge offers the chance to maximise the hairy one's abilities through exploring a scrolling action/stealth game. But before memories come flooding back of recent licence disappointments such as Dark Angel (Issue 15, 4.5), relax - Wolverine's Revenge is a breed apart.
So why is the grizzly fella out for revenge? Well, apart from needing to hunt down his hairdresser (he's got bigger sideburns than Supergrass), Wolverine has to find a cure for a mysterious virus that's been dormant in his system for years but has suddenly become active and given him 48 hours to find an antidote.
The action is often of the 'beat the bad guys and find the exit' variety, but it's the manner and method you choose to dispatch the opponents that makes this game a little different from the endless conveyor belt of similar titles available. For a start, you have the rather cool mutant sense mode. With a squeeze of the Left trigger the screen turns a radioactive orange (which represents thermal imaging), producing an almost cel-shaded effect that allows you to detect the scent trails of enemies - you don't have to be seen in order to strike. You can also spot hidden traps and objects (vital when negotiating a booby-trapped room) and unleash a different array of attacks via a stealth attack. The change in style helps take the level of mayhem down a notch or two from carnage to controlled aggression and does an admirable job of fluctuating the pace of the game.
The attack system is similar to Dead to Rights' (Issue 12, 7.0). You have your basic single-button punches and kicks, and if enough of them are thrown together successfully a strike message appears. This allows you to hit the B button and begin an automated killing bonanza. There are four special strikes available and further attacks can be unlocked depending on the number of stealth kills you perform.
Die-hard fight fans will no doubt sneer at the simplistic combat system, but for the nature of this mainstream action romp it works well. The style enables casual gamers to see some pretty spectacular kills without needing to do button gymnastics, while still allowing greater sophistication for players that want to unlock every strike sequence. These become increasingly harder to perform due to the number of buttons that must be pressed.
The action isn't all about mindless baddies following you around a map either. The developers have come up with more than a few interesting twists to keep the game fresh. One level will find you needing to beat soldiers senseless before hoisting them above your head and feeding them to an invincible mutant (Wendigo) that's blocking your path. To counter, another mission will involve you using all your stealth abilities to pass through an area undetected before having to find your way through a pitch-black mine. The imagination gland of the game designers has at least been lightly tickled allowing for a more enjoyable experience than the usual mundane 'punch and run' style action games.
With no difficulty setting, some of the action (especially the various bosses) has an old-skool trial and error feel about it that can often result in our tough-as-nails superhero dying a little more frequently than one would have hoped. The control can also be a bit hit and miss. Your opportunity to create a strike is down to split-second timing and sometimes when trying to wall hug - la Metal Gear Solid - the controls offer a clunky response that wastes valuable seconds when needing to hide.
But these worries can be put to one side because Wolverine's Revenge doesn't pretend to have ideas above its station. It's not going to blow you away with ground-breaking design and it's probably not a game you'll be playing a year from now. But it does provide an interesting twist to a veteran genre that ultimately makes the game more enjoyable than other comparable titles.
With a solid sense of control over Wolverine's abilities (even down to deciding when to unleash his claws) the game makes you behave how the character would - resulting in a better use of the X-Men licence than we've seen before. And that's all the reason you need to play it.
X-MEN: LEGENDS
Great mix of beat 'em up and chin-stroking character customisation. Fantastically addictive comic book caper
Beat 'em up - Issue 36 (December 2004) - 8.5/10
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AV03001W)
XmenLegs.txtRead Review
For all the sexily sleek styling of the two recent (and undoubtedly ace) movies, the X-Men have actually been knocking around for quite a while. 1963 saw their inked entrance, and it's a testament to the imagination of creator Stan Lee and the endearingly human side of the characters that they've managed to percolate their way into our consciousness so successfully.
We've had a couple of mutated meetings with the X-Men on Xbox, with X-Men 2: Wolverine's Revenge (Issue 17, 7.4) being the best of the two. But Raven Software has flown in this time around, and the end result is refreshingly different from your average beat 'em up. For a start, it's mixed with brilliantly accessible RPG elements.
Following the exploits of troubled teen Alison Crestmere (who later becomes hottie Magma), players get the chance to play through numerous story missions with a group of up to four spandexed superheroes. As Alison explores the Xavier Institute and encounters more mutants, they too become available for the next mission.
RPG elements are evident in more ways than picking a merry band of mutants, though. Combat is determined by hit points, but because of the real-time nature, this feels more like a frantic beat 'em up. Each character has a wealth of melee combos at his/her disposal, and you can make use of their fantastic special attacks. Holding the Right trigger brings up a menu of available powers (depending on experience and energy in your Special bar), and enables you to choose a unique attack.
Each enemy defeated results in your characters amassing the staple of every RPG - XP (experience points). After set totals are amassed, players can allocate Level Up points to certain attributes of each character. Brilliantly, this can be done at any point during the game (even during a manic fight), keeping the gameplay fresh and involving.
Although this may sound more complex than Cerebro's blueprints, the intuitive controls ensure that, even during a pitched battle, players can instantly flick between characters with the D-Pad and inflict all manner of bashings. Combos are hugely satisfyingly double acts performed when two or more characters unleash complementing attacks on an enemy, and result in multiplied XP. Worrying about your charges isn't a problem though, because your team-mates' AI is really spot-on. Every time you execute a special attack, one of the other three characters will perform a complementing attack at the same time.
There's a hefty strategic undercurrent running throughout the game too. X-traction points are dotted around levels that, as well as acting as handy save points, allow players to interchange characters in and out of their team as the situation may necessitate. Encountered a chasm with no viable way across? Simply enrol the help of Ice Man, and the silver surfer will conjure up a polar platform for team to cross. Some enemies can resist certain attacks too, so when Wolverine's claws have little impact on bad guys resistant to Physical Force, swap him out for the likes of Cyclops and Jean Gray who'll destroy the enemies with alternative powers.
We haven't really got too much to find fault with in X-Men: Legends. The cel-shaded graphics are an obvious choice for a comic book adaptation and, although lacking detail, work surprisingly well. The combat, despite being based on HP, is as fast and frantic as any beat 'em up out there, and the four-way multiplayer is an absolute blast. We could gripe about the occasional scarcity of save points, forcing players to replay large chunks of levels time and time again, but this is a forgivable niggle when you consider the involving gameplay and massive amount of character customisation and replayability. Suit up for one of the best superhero romps on Xbox, believers.
X-MEN LEGENDS II: RISE OF APOCALYPSE
Another world-saving RPG effort from comic-land's best-dressed mutants
RPG - Issue 49 (December 2005) - 8.5/10
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X-Men2.txtRead Review
X-Men Legends (Issue 36, 8.5) was a pleasant surprise. Rather than simply churning out yet another half-arsed third-person action-adventure game, as is often the case with these things, Activision instead produced a solid, action RPG based on the old Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance (Issue 08, 8.5) format: 20-odd hours of supremely satisfying dungeon crawling with a novel, comic book twist.
And that's exactly what we have again: 20-odd hours - plus the same again thanks to the significantly beefed-up story and level sizes that dwarf the original - of old-school exploration, stat-tinkering and monster-fighting. X-Men Legends II might not be the most groundbreaking of adventures, but what it does it does very well.
The major hook for X-Men fans this time is the ability to take control of not just the X-Men, but the Brotherhood as well, the rival mutant faction led by Professor X's nemesis, Magneto. The reasoning behind it is all a bit contrived, to be honest (and you'll need to be a real X-Men buff to get the most from the plot), but the amount of new characters and special powers the unlikely alliance opens up is frankly bewildering. It's almost too much at times, trying to keep track of the experience and equipment set-ups of well over a dozen different characters at once. That said, RPG fans will love the insane amount of stat-fiddling on offer.
Plus, never underestimate the power of a decent online co-operative mode, and developer Raven has duly obliged. It doesn't add a great deal in terms of how you play, but this is the sort of game that comes alive when played with friends. More of the same then, but it's still a good same.
X-MEN: THE OFFICIAL GAME
Three killer mutants and three ways to break faces in this action-packed movie tie-in
Action - Issue 57 (July 2006) - 7.0/10
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AV07001W)
davinci.txtRead Review
Tom Hanks as a videogame star? Nah. Can't see it, especially not at the age he is now. Fleshy jowls are appearing where his cheekbones used to be, and the kids probably wouldn't go for it. Frankly neither would we. Great actor, but digital hero? Pull the other one.
That's probably exactly what developer The Collective thought, because Hanks' likeness as the reluctant hero, university symbologist Robert Langdon, is nowhere to be seen. Some aspects of the movie have crept into the game, such as a couple of the locations, but The Da Vinci Code is more of a companion to the original paper incarnation of the story rather than the celluloid one (actually, the movie's been filmed entirely digitally, but you get the point). Unfortunately, it also means the gorgeous Audrey Tautou, who plays Sophie Neveu (another '-ologist' of old stuff) in the movie doesn't get a look in.
Funnily enough, given all the hoo-hah surrounding the book's originality, the game instantly feels strangely familiar. The deliberate pacing, the leisurely approach to exploration, the string of complex puzzles... Come to think of it, it's all reminiscent of another languid mystery-adventure, Broken Sword: The Sleeping Dragon. So has The Da Vinci Code been sneakily nicking all its ideas, like some lazy videogame tea-leaf? Well, no, not really. Broken Sword's creator, Charles Cecil, was responsible for many of The Da Vinci Code's new puzzles, hence the huge sense of dj
vu. Even some of the conundrums described in the book have been reworked to better fit the game.
And it's the puzzles that really make it. They occur frequently - as in the novel - as Langdon and Neveu try to discover the secrets of the code, and they provide a hefty challenge. But while you may find yourself having to break out the Panadol every now and again to stop your head pounding, the plot's next twists and turns lie tantalisingly beyond a tricky lock or encrypted message. And the game at least provides you with all the information you need to overcome them; thing is, you've got to figure out which bits to use.
Every bit of significant information you come across during the course of the game is logged, and before long there's an almost bewildering library of facts and trivia, which can be called up by pressing the White button. Finding a crucial piece of info can be almost as difficult as the puzzle you're trying to solve because you need to wade through a series of lists and links, but at least the solutions aren't handed out on a plate.
Some of the set-pieces aren't quite so taxing, involving more obvious solutions such as warding off snarling guard dogs by throwing chunks of meat to them. The mental test offered by The Da Vinci Code is deep and varied, and passing each one and getting closer to the game's climax is very satisfying.
The Collective always said it would stay true to the spirit of the original story, and to a large extent it has. The game has a rich atmosphere, helped by being set in lots of big moody cathedrals and art museums with rubbish lighting, but unfortunately it's certainly not a looker. Character models are on the basic side, moving jerkily and looking unnervingly vacant even when in conversation, and it's a shame that just as the plot begins to get a grip on you, you're stopped from becoming too absorbed by the game's visual shortcomings.
Then there's the way the plot itself is delivered. All the story exposition business is handled through conversations, and we must warn you: they don't half drag on. The central characters talk so much there's a real risk you could end up trying to stuff rolled-up socks into your telly's speakers in a desperate attempt to shut them up. Luckily, you can skip through all the chatty bits if you want, and you will want to. The danger is that by doing that you'll probably miss a vital clue (although you can always retrieve it using that White button function).
Even worse, if you've got the subtitles on, half your screen will be obscured at times because of the sheer amount of text that has to be delivered. To be fair, there are few games that attempt to convey such a large plot, although Broken Sword was able to deliver a big story with much more efficiency. But at times you'll be tempted to forget about the story so you can simply get back to playing.
You may get fed up with listening to people jabbering on about hitting things, but thankfully the game provides some relief there - it is billed as an action-adventure, after all. There are all manner of robed weirdos, nosey coppers and secret society types stood between Langdon and Neveu and the secrets of the Priory of Sion - the organisation with the means of finding the Holy Grail - and there comes a time when creeping about and quietly collecting clues takes a back seat to the simple pleasure of lamping someone with a dustbin.
Except that there isn't anything simple about it, not at first, anyway. Compared to the more measured bulk of the game, scrapping it out is a slightly clunky and chaotic affair, which will often result in game-over until you've got it licked. Luckily you're allowed to change the difficulty setting as and when you need to, so if a fight proves impassable you can take some of the heat out of it, knock seven bells out of an enemy and move on.
The Da Vinci Code has been developed with a lot of common sense. It's regularly highly challenging, yet there's rarely anything that'll halt your progress for too long thanks to clue-hoovering. The mechanism for clue-hunting is solid, too - on examining a body, painting or anything else of interest, a first-person perspective is entered and the screen can be panned around to fully inspect it for nuggets of information.
But other areas let the game down a little - the wooden character animation, the often tortuous dialogue and the sometimes overly relaxed pace (one area in which the game differs from the book). If you're a newcomer to the phenomenon of all this Jesus-themed, impossible code-breaking malarkey you'll find parts of The Da Vinci Code pretty bloody annoying. However, you'll find more to like, especially if you enjoyed Broken Sword.
YAGER
A decent, enjoyable blaster that falls a wee bit short of greatness
Shooter - Issue 15 (April 2003) - 7.6/10
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Yager.txtRead Review
Phew! It's a good job that our parents don't get to choose both our first name and our surname when we're born. If they did, we might all end up with names as humourlessly cheesy as the current batch of gaming heroes, TOCA's Ryan McKane and Yager's Magnus Tide. Or even as silly as 'Gavin Ogden'.
Magnus Tide is a wise-crackin' freelance pilot with an ego to match his spiky hairdo. That's you, that is. As Magnus, you'll play through a series of 22 missions, the majority of which place you in the cockpit of his posh new Sagittarius ship. As a freelancer for Proteus, a trade organisation that effectively governs half the planet, you get to go on dangerous missions in return for cold hard cash. Bunce...
Of course, this is all an excuse for a good old-fashioned blaster. And Yager ticks off quite a few of the boxes any self-respecting shooter needs to if it's to impress the Xbox crowd. For a start, many of the sights you'll see from your lofty perch are truly lovely. The digital brush has been dipped into almost every section of the Xbox colour palette to produce some of the dreamiest skies and dusky vistas we've yet to see in other games.
All this is seriously colourful stuff, and it makes the world of Yager a very appealing place in which to fly about - even though the draw distance isn't as big as some.
Striking design doesn't stop at the evocative scenery - Yager's got some of the most impressive explosions this side of the Big Bang. The way enemy ships go up in smoke always looks good and is sometimes spectacular, with bits falling off the ship, sparks flying and the final, terminal explosion ripping the vehicle apart. Even better are the ones where a hit from your laser sends an enemy ship into a death plunge, and you watch it spiral full speed into a hillside. That's gotta hurt!
The effect of these kabooms might make your ship feel ultra powerful, but curiously this impression is diluted by the weedy weapons Magnus has at his disposal. You get more as you progress, but even the increasingly powerful hardware never feels quite as destructive as you'd like. Regardless, the explosions in the game are among the most satisfying we've come across since our first ejection of an Elite from his Banshee in Halo (Issue 01, 9.7).
The overall experience of piloting your ship is well thought out. The Sagittarius has two modes of flight - Hover and Jet - which you can switch between with a click of an analogue stick. Hover enables you to aim more accurately and pick up munitions, but makes you a sitting target. Jet is better for dogfights, as long as you're skilful enough to keep a flighty enemy in your sights.
The control scheme works well, but as with the weedy weapons, there's something that prevents it from feeling quite right. The Jet mode is supposed to turn the ship into a speedy killing machine, but it fails. Even when you're flying at full pelt with an additional boost power-up the Sagittarius feels too sluggish to be truly exciting, as it is in Deadly Skies (Issue 03, 5.2).
Even so, Yager manages to provide some hectic moments. The action starts getting pretty tricky after a few missions and you'll really need to master the ship's controls to make it to the end of the game. When three or four enemies are out for your blood all at once and you've got only limited ammo, getting through the situation demands plenty of skill. Accordingly, it's satisfying when you complete a tough mission - and there are plenty of those later on.
Magnus Tide is one of the game's problems. As with this month's racing character, Ryan McKane (from TOCA Race Driver), and despite the grand name, Magnus fails to captivate. He's also more irritating than Ryan and his cringe-making quips are way too frequent for his own good. Magnus totally misses the mark as a character to whom the player is supposed to relate, and sometimes he even manages to make the entire package feel rather sub-standard. A crying shame given that the action deserves a whole lot better.
It's not Magnus that prevents the game from achieving Elite status though, it's the rather puny feel of the weapons and lack of speed. But while it's not a must-buy, in terms of free-roaming flight combat, it's solid, fun and sends a few heat seekers up the exhausts of games like Deadly Skies, Reign of Fire (Issue 11, 5.0), Fireblade (Issue 12, 2.8) and Defender (Issue 14, 6.6).
If cruising around picturesque islands and downing baddies in spectacular balls of flame sounds like your kind of thing, then ignore Magnus and give Yager a shot.
YETISPORTS ARCTIC ADVENTURES
Bland, tedious, poor visuals, totally uninvolving, and nowhere near as fun or addictive as the Flash version
Screenshots - Party - Issue 45 (August 2005) - 4.0/10
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Yetisports.txtRead Review
Screenshots:




If, like us, you wasted countless hours on the furiously addictive 2D Flash game that provided the inspiration for this £19.99 Xbox title, it may come as a bit of a shock that this is truly, truly abominable.
On the plus side, at least this Xbox version won't get you fired for wasting your company's time (in this PC-crazy world isn't that classed as 'stealing' nowadays?). On the downside, the regular Flash version was much more fun. Seriously. Surprisingly long load times (for what exactly? The visuals are more reminiscent of a PlayStation 1 title) punctuate not only each different game, but the length of time between each go is also annoyingly large. At least the PC version allowed instant flipper-twatting fun.
Single player mode involves familiar sub games such as Penguin Baseball, Penguin Golf, Penguin Darts (you can sense a theme developing here), Halfpipe Race and Seagull Drop. The controls for these feel clumsy, and the switch from 2D to 3D feels shoddy and contrived. One difference is that your projectile can now be controlled, both in the air and while skidding along the ground. Bonus icons that can be collected for increased points/speed/time that add a little more playability to the otherwise woeful proceedings, but not enough to really save it from the plunging into the icy depths of monotony.
Up to eight players can battle it out through Tournament mode, but you have to take it in turns to play one at a time, on the same screen. And after you've sat through the third round of Penguin Darts for the sixth time, the novelty and 'party' atmosphere of this really starts to wear off. Very quickly. Xbox Live scoreboards are on offer, but who wants to compare points totals when playing against each other would have been a lot more fun? This is sure to instantly melt away in this hot summer of blockbusters.
YU-GI-OH! DAWN OF DESTINY
Utterly confusing to anyone other than fans. Steer clear unless Yu-Gi-Oh! Is your idea of top Saturday morning TV
Puzzle - Issue 37 (XMas 2004) - 5.0/10
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YuGiOh.txtRead Review
Some things will always baffle adults. The blissful ignorance of youth deems jumping in muddy puddles, smearing your face with chocolate and playing with dog shit to all be perfectly acceptable pastimes. Adults seem even more confused by the obsession many kids have with the trading cards that symbiotically exist with a phenomenally successful cartoon. And if you've ever woken up stupidly early on a weekend (or stumbled in at 8am after a heavy night out), you'll have no doubt seen something of the Yu-Gi-Oh phenomenon.
Little YuGi discovers a mysterious pendant in his grandfather's trinket shop that gives him the ability to use various magical powers whilst battling against fellow opponents in his favoured monster card trading game. A virtual version of a real card game will never be as interesting as the real thing, but Dawn of Destiny does provide a more involving experience. This is partly due to players trying to make sense of the game, thanks to the annoying absence of a tutorial. Basically a trumped-up version of, well, Top Trumps, players must use their deck of monsters to defeat opponents based on their attacking/defence attributes.
You can set each card to defend (horizontally, face down) or attack (vertically, face up). Spell cards can be stacked behind the Monster cards to enhance their abilities, whilst Trap cards can cancel out a foe's attack. As soon as a fight is picked, the two creatures will face off dramatically, only for the declared loser to instantly disappear in a puff of smoke/bolt of lightning/uninspiring way. Very disappointing. Each player has a Life Points total, which is depleted every time a monster is defeated, then it's match over. Erm, and that's about it as far as gameplay goes. Multiplayer is available through System Link only which makes for a bit of a lonely experience, though game modes remain the same as the single-player game. If you can make head or tail of the multitude of minor rules and spell/trap combinations, or already enjoy the cartoon, check this out. Anyone over 12, dig out that old algebra textbook for some more interesting bafflement.
ZAPPER
Horrible controls, repetitive levels, but multiplayer provides laughs
Platformer - Issue 16 (May 2003) - 5.0/10
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Zapper.txtRead Review
Not all games want to be groundbreaking masterpieces. Some set out with modest aspirations and are happy to achieve their goals. Zapper falls at least partially into this category, in that it has modest ambitions.
You play the role of a cricket called Zapper who's on a quest to rescue his brother Zipper from Maggie the magpie. Maggie is a bit of a tea leaf who collects all shiny things (including Zipper) and gets so excited she drops her drawers and lays random magpie eggs. Hence our hero has to rescue his stricken bro whilst collecting the eggs scattered throughout each level.
Zap's mum must have been playing away with Kermit next door, because this little fella has all the hallmarks of veteran amphibian character Frogger. And the chief characteristic is his inability to move any great distance - which may be exciting when dodging lorries on busy dual carriageways but is ultimately incredibly tiresome in any other game.
Zapper is a very basic linear platformer consisting of four worlds split into small stages and secret areas that are about as hidden as a paratrooper squadron landing in Trafalgar Square. With fireworks. There are 17 levels in total and what it lacks in sophistication it often makes up in frustration.
It feels like a platform game from the (very) old skool where your success is based entirely on timing, thanks to your very limited movements. Mother Nature never planned on crickets wanting to make diagonal jumps and it's too easy to fall off a platform just by trying to get from A to B, as you must use the triggers to change the direction of your character.
But solace may be found by some gamers in the multiplayer modes. Up to four crickets can partake in a multitude of games including deathmatch, last man standing and zipper ball (kind of like an insect version of rugby). These games are by no means great, but do offer a welcome distraction from the more mundane single-player effort.
Zapper's problem is that it fails to really address either of its intended audiences. It's too frustrating to hold the attention span of younger gamers and doesn't offer enough reward for more experienced players. It's pretty enough to look at and the music is surprisingly good - a blend of Latin, samba and drum and bass, but that's about it. And for a retail price of around £20 the adage that applies is "you get what you pay for".
ZATHURA
May we interest you in a generic film tie-in platformer? Duller than playing snakes and ladders with a corpse
Platformer - Issue 53 (March 2006) - 3.2/10
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zathura.txtRead Review
Zathura makes no sense. The younger of the two boys you control in this drab puzzle adventure can kick and break wooden and metal crates. But he can't break cardboard boxes. The older boy can't kick at all. He has to find a spanner before he can smash the crates that block his path.
It's a prime example of the stupid logic in this game. And it only gets worse. You walk into a room where three turrets are firing lasers at you. You're told you can repel the lasers by hitting them with your spanner. What? Maybe this kid is Luke Skywalker in disguise. We wouldn't mind so much if it worked, but it's near impossible to hit back lasers without taking most of them in the face.
This defective, totally useless play mechanic reflects the overall quality of Zathura: it's shoddy. There are lots of large, platform-filled rooms with pre-fixed camera angles so useless you'll struggle on the simplest of jumps. The totally rubbish gameplay doesn't help, with clumsy controls and really weak jumps. It's this sort of game that results in the death of innocent Xbox controllers. Luckily, when you die the game tends to respawn you at the entrance to the room in which you perished, so you don't have the added torture of playing through large sections of levels over again.
But you'll still get a feeling of déjà-vu as you wander from one identical looking room to the next. Unbelievably, the exact same room is used multiple times in a single level, with nothing but a few repositioned crates and a different enemy to distinguish one from the other. And there are no clever puzzles either - just kill a few enemies, press a switch and be on your way.
This lack of variety is slightly made up for by changing gameplay scenarios. As well as the two young boys, you also play as a robot that jumps higher and can fire lasers. A mix off different events means that one minute you'll be shooting down little flying saucers, the next plummeting down a deep chasm firing at rocks as you fall.
Unfortunately, every gameplay scenario handles about as well as a car with one wheel. When manning the gun turret, more UFOs charge at you than you can possibly shoot. The bit where you fall down the chasm is pointless - hitting the rocks is easy and even if you miss they don't kill you. But the worst bit is when you have to run away from a wall of fire, avoiding explosive barrels that are hurled your way (as stolen from 1983's Donkey Kong) - although it's impossible to tell where they're going to land. After dying a lot, we discovered the secret was not to dodge at all, just crouch and wait for most of the barrels to miss. Playing Zathura is like being force-fed Saddam Hussein's skidmarked underpants. And we find that kind of thing really upsetting.